Feng Shui Bad Neighbor Hell? What can you do when you can’t move, but your neighbor is an Energy Vampire? Thankfully, there are techniques. If you’re speed reading this and looking for a solution, here is the short version. Put a line of salt along your threshold. It’s old school, but it works. It is like the castor oil pack of House Witchery.
Dear Mystic,
I had a massive falling-out with an (ex) friend before Xmas. Unfortunately, she lives next door to me: Our front doors face each other, and our doormats are less than one foot apart. She leaves her door open all the time. I love my qi flow too, but also like my privacy and like to respect others. I am doing my best to avoid, be zen, ignore the pass-aggro acts, and not react, but it is internalizing and driving me mental.
I am a pretty intuitive Cancerian, and she is a scary-psychic Pisces. We are both mega sensitive and reactive with lots of fire and water in our charts. We both smudge and use crystals etc.
My gut feeling and intellect tell me this person is mega-needy, manipulative, and plays games if things don’t go her way. She seems to get what she wants after tons of drama.
Cutting to the chase: I am a bit scared of doing a “Get fuq’d and stay fuq’d” type chant as I don’t want to wish her ill-will or create a lousy karma situation for myself. I want her out of my (previously) peaceful life and home environment, out of the flat next door, off my doorstep, and out of my head. A friend suggests I need to be okay with her being there. I’ve tried, but it’s hard. Any advice?
In other situations, I would cut my losses, pack my bags, call the removalist, and find another place, but I don’t have the luxury or the energy. And I was here first; this apartment is one of the best things that has happened in my life after years of moving frequently and not having my own space. I’m also recovering from significant health problems, to which stress was a contributing factor, and don’t have any more energy to waste on this situation. That said, I have learned some MASSIVE lessons through this drama (with the help of my psychologist) and am working on gratitude.
Cancerian In An Eclipse
Dear Cancerian In An Eclipse,
I understand the stress of this and how frustrating to have found a place you like but now this! It would perturb anyone, but your Power-Lair is extra-vital as a Cancerian, and it seems to be threatened. Or is it. Let’s look at some of the better facets of your dilemma.
You are in a place you love. Imagine if you loathed it but, for practical reasons, could not move.
Additionally, it is better to have a powerful woman living next door to you than a skeevy gentleman or a person you knew was mean to their children or pets.
So don’t put up anything that says “dispelling dark energy” – like a gargoyle or even ba gua mirror. They can reverberate in bizarre ways if you are not completely sure of what you’re doing or if you’re regaining your vitality after an illness, as you are!
This scenario you are conjuring makes me think of two potent witches living side by side or Bette Davis and Joan Crawford in Whatever Happened To Baby Jane. Not that either of you is decrepit or bitter, more the concept of two powerful females at loggerheads but with, deep down, an affinity.
Strategically, to be Machiavellian about it, being the person reaching out to resolve this eloquently puts YOU in the power position. You’re playing to your worst Cancerian tendencies by holding the grudge, and you could inadvertently feed the situation.
Have you considered visiting her on a day with a diplomatic Moon or fabulous astrology in general and tinkling around some charm? Don’t linger – have someplace to go – but arrive with flowers, chocolate, or fancy incense and simply be light. If there is an actual rift due to a particular reason, acknowledge it but signal that you’re moving on.
You can maintain diplomatic relations with a person/country without necessarily approving of everything about them/it. And you can limit your engagement to a level you are comfortable with. Or are you saying that this person is one of those All or Nothing people?
Magic-wise put a discreet line of salt across your threshold and a small deity statue or image representing the ruler of your Home sector in the birth chart. So if your 4th House is – say – Taurus, make it a Venusian vibe.
You could also look at the Flying Stars Feng Shui for the year? Is it possible that a harmonious entry star has been affected by a yearly influence? You could get a Feng Shui consult or figure it out via a flying star calculator online.
Rather than concentrating on your Piscean neighbor’s perfidy or poxy personality, elevate your vibe – you, the house, everything. And, if she does harbor horrible intentions toward you or is an etheric grifter, the line of salt should flush her out!
What does everyone else think?
Yo, I’m having neighbor trouble and here’s what waiting for me in the archive recommandation post slot (and since Mystic changed them to only one on mobile — this ish feel xxxxxtra magical!!)
I had sent this to MM as a review about a year ago but it really bears repeating :
« The MM Archive is like a black hole spitting out high-velocity, straight-from-the-Source Astro-relevant info at anyone who dares look at it. Powered by the Collective Unconscious and fast fiber, obvi. »
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I love this!
With all that Cancer I have to say this sounds like a Pluto transit to me. You are going to have to do a lot of shadow work and work with projections. It sounds compulsive to me which says Pluto to me. Rough. But you’ll learn at the end of it.
If you don’t already have it Mystic recommended Howard Sasportas Gods of Change in a prior article. Life changing read for me on the transits of the outer planets.
Good luck and solidarity, chica.
Im a Virgo with Cancer Moon. It’s weird because it’s true to me too. I guess I can make a sure-fire assumption that for those having Cancer essence; privacy and property is EVERYTHING. We will pinch back to whoever try to disturb our lair.
“two potent witches living side by side or Bette Davis and Joan Crawford in Whatever Happened To Baby Jane …”
Oh, YES!
Very respectfully, may I ask if, perhaps, this is more your issue, and that difficult, but fine practice of letting go may be more in line here? Again, I don’t know the situation completely, but I have found that when I attend more to MYself in my own space that others become less of an issue. I wish you peace. <3
I’ve successfully “frozen out” many toxic people using a basic freezing spell (write their name on a piece of paper, place in ice cube tray with water, literally freeze in freezer, chant that they are out of your life and cannot affect/influence you in any way which is not for your greatest good etc) literally when I do this spell people begin to treat me like I don’t exist it’s FANTASTIC because you do no harm to them it’s just like you’ve been vaccinated against them.
Secondly, read “The Work” of Byron Katie. Trains you in the ability to rise above and literally not care about stuff like this. Trust me it’s hard but it does work.
i have to say feng shui is mad science beyond my comprehension, so i can’t speak to that. what i ~can~ speak to is qi vampires, and my own recent experience in banishing. i had an energetic attachment which doing deep comtemplative magic revealed i was drawing in as much as it was robbing me of my life force. two words: cord cutting. it can be painful, but clears your personal energy field of any attachments to the other entity (human or otherwise). after cutting cords, as has been mentioned, lots of clearing, sage, black salt. if she’s pisces and you have heavy water in your chart, water banishing like ritual baths and hoodoo floor washes would imho be most effective. (if you can’t make your own i would get some good quality florida water) a nice witches bottle buried in the yard can’t hurt to deflect any potential incoming negative energy, but it sounds like it’s more on your side, where the cord cutting and clearing will be most helpful. if you can wait until after the full moon when we are in a waning cycle again, you’ll get more bang for your buck. best of luck to you!
Lol. Succinct.
Aries mercury doesn’t have the time or patience for that. And Leo rising likes to have her say.
Rah, rah, rah, rah…
Ooh, this is hard!! You are clearly very sensitive and I hope you are putting a big golden net around your home after every cleanse to keep the negativity away.. I have a situation with someone in a different but similar way and I don’t handle it well.
Trying really hard to take note of my Gem’s attitude as he is super fluid when he wants. He has no expectations, lets go immediately and focuses on his own well being and happiness first.
It is easier said than done.
Maybe set up a visualisation board of hope? Build it in the astral and eventually it can manifest in the physical realm. The ideal house, the ideal living situation and the ideal neighbours you would dream of… intend it all and don’t get concerned about how it can occur. Leave it to your higher self to work it out.
Whoa – & also any other roosters sleeping to the west? I have been for a few months & It’s not been great, lol
I am and I do. It’s the only arrangement that works in my bedroom.
Except for my perimenopausal hot flashes waking me up, it’s been fine.
oh dear, I have a sort of conflict with my housemate and I just moved my desk where I spend quite a bit of time (the moving of the desk in some ways relates to the conflict). I am a year of the Rooster person and it is now facing North-West, should I be concerned?
Hey,
I hope my story might be of use to you: I moved into my dream flat (bought it, theres no moving out in a hurry) only to discover that my immediate neighbour has a domestic violence issue. At first I felt like I couldnt stand it, I was sensitive, felt like I could feel the awful through the walls. But what has worked for me is a growing sense that everything stops at my front door. My home is my refuge and now I feel like once that door is closed everything else stays outside. I have a lovely home life, use my ear plugs when necessary and otherwise ignore it (this is the reality of the world we live in, whatever dysfunction or sadness exists, we need to find a way to be at peace with living near/with it).
The way you describe the situation reminds me of me in that all your focus is on her, and on protecting your space from her – in the end its still all about her though. Having the world stop at your front door might give you the space to feel relaxed and have some polite but cool relationship but not driven by an obsession to get rid of this awful feeling in you about your relationship with her. Make a boundary from the world, focus on yourself, make her into a minor detail in your life. it will eventually cool. Bring the focus back to yourself and your great life, boundaries will be much less fraught from that angle.
Thats my best effort at helpfulness! all the best
All i know is its not always about mirror mirror. There are chi vamps out there thats for sure. I am still recovering from the latest solar eclipse cleaning out my 11th house. As saturn rules my 11th had couple of lower pluto type bitches who were always after what i have.to the point of causing me a breakdown.
The iching confirmed it too.
But she was a master at having such a friendly and caring mask. Meanwhile shes always rubbing it in type; put down comments; milking you for things ,eating your expensive organic food whilst only contributing old sprayed vegies or cheapest frozen potatoes, hoki fish (im vego!).
She took the slogan “i use” for capricorn very literally and milked her way around.
But i have pisces rising so ive finally at 50 stop now being anyones doormat!
.
Neptune squarin my mars natal( in this case) actually means i have Seductive Enemies!she is bisexual and tried once but i not interested!
This one above who is kind of stalking i been mixing with her for the last 10 painful years on and off. I was blinded by neptune!
Her astrology a fatal mix of capricorn/scorpio pluto sq in her 1st leo is a formidable opponent.
She always got the better of me so im having to regroup. As other said where mind goes energy flows. But taking all my energy.
definately need flower essences though!
Ooh- flower essences are a great idea.
You’ve got to be careful that in manifesting what you want for yourself, you’re not interfering with her journey. I do hear your desperation and understand why you want her gone but perhaps it is not your right to demand that, or to use sacred practices to achieve it.
Sometimes it doesn’t matter how much we visualise, cast, declare, smudge, journey…life is life and people are people. Like12th House Virgo pointed out, sometimes the discomfort is the lesson.
I have my own version of this story and it’s been running in my life for 6 years. The only way I can get away from this monad (FASCINATING autocorrect…I actually wrote “woman”) is to leave my husband, and so far I haven’t chosen that.
You have several points of power here.
You can seize this as a monumental opportunity to explore the shadow aspects of self that she activates in you, and that you observe in her. Integrating these and accepting your role in the drama (even if all you’re responsible for is feeding it energetically) will strengthen you enormously. One day you might send her a prayer of gratitude for being one of your greatest teachers.
You can ground deeply into your self and rather than using your magic on this woman, use it on yourself to empower you. Focus on you, not her. Sometimes we overuse protection and it reinforces a victim archetype that we really don’t want to express. Strengthen your light so you don’t need protection. Just KNOW you are untouchable. KNOW your abode is impenetrable.
Recall all of your energy because it sounds like you are energising the situation at the moment. The moment you focus on her, you let her in. Let her be nothing to you.
Make peace with her, if only in your heart. That heart resonance will defuse and dismantle the dark matrix that has been constructed. Use the Ho’Oponono whenever you think of her.
And finally, obviously, if the entire situation is intolerable, use your skills to manifest somewhere even better to live, and…leave. Because although you don’t want to do that, you can! Power.
I hope none of this sounds preachey honey. I really do empathise. It’s been a roller coaster for me and everything I’ve written to you, I wish someone had said to me 6 years ago.
xxx
Ho’Oponopono!
Oh that hopononono is very strong and swift acting if all my attempts can be considered. Amazing shifts within 24 hours. Peace and progression.
Good stuff Lioness!
I must be missing something too, because to me it sounds like a simple personality conflict. Why are you giving this so much of your energy? Whenever I dislike someone, they’re basically dead to me – IDGAF where they are or what they do; I’ll walk right past ‘em as if they aren’t even there rather than dignify them with a nano-molecule of my annoyance or contempt. You would have to fuq me over *royally* in order for me to harbor any kind of resentment over the situation, and from what you have disclosed thus far it really doesn’t sound like she merits the reaction you are giving her.
Whenever we point the finger at somebody else, we have 3 others pointing back at ourselves – mirror, mirror….Perhaps whatever it is you find irritating about her is actually triggering you on a deeper level and you’re having this severe reaction because underneath it all it might remind you of someone else. IMO, this is mainly going to be an inside job – anything else would be naught but a superficial band-aid. I will say, though, that I differ re: the Venus Rx advice – I look at this time simply as a cease-fire so you re-evaluate whether it’s worth continuing to hold onto your anger regarding the relationship in question. I think with Venus retro in Aries, you do not yourself initiate a reconciliation but let the other party do it and offer the olive branch first if it’s meant to be. Relationships that manage to reconcile under Venus Rx have no guarantee of longevity and certainly not with Aries being the sign of Venus’ detriment. If you truly do decide you want to “forgive and forget”, wait for Venus back into Pisces for that.
“But don’t look back in anger, I heard you say…”
oh dear, you mirror each other. Stop focusing on her and look inside to see yourself. You are making this situation more strong by focusing on it. More energy you give it, the bigger it grows. Why you putting all your energy into her? Sounds like lots unresolved issues, and believe me I have been alive for a while, never met a better obsessor/grudge holder than Kataka. And you got a bit of snarky Kali Lilith killer Scorpio energy going that you are TOTALLY misusing.Scorpio can only use her sting once to defend then dies, you running round with your tail & stinger up screaming ‘HELP” me… Sounds like a power battle to me. Just move and stop making excuses and blaming her! Sell up, or exit lease, and go. Life is too short. And you are making yourself sick. I got bitten by a nasty Cancer woman a few years ago, who blamed me for something that was totally her daughters fault ( chip off the old block but a Leo bitch). 5 years later, I moved to another workplace and another town…she’s STILL after me FARQ. Every time I think of her (which I try not to) my inner Gordon Ramsay emerges spitting his trademark profanities. I am serious…best win is to not engage and go. Be happy
i like this, im kataka rising with scorpio saturn and pluto. Guilty as charged.
One of the first things I thought was to read up on the protection stuff from the archives, but it seems as though you have already searched out those options.
I also have a weird former friend thing that I’ve been learning from and dealing with for, my god, about a year and a half now. Off and on super stressful, she is dating my brother in law and there’s super creepy elements of jealousy and power ‘struggles’ between her & I and the two brothers. I have been with my husband for 20 years, just to add perspective. So I guess just be glad your vamp is not showing up to every family function and trying to alpha into every context you give a damn about.
We have a mutual friend who believes it’s necessary to be able to, without being friends again per se, be together for a brief period of time. Say, pour each other a drink and then go on our separate ways. Thing is, I do not know how to get to that point other than search my soul and continuously redirect the heavy, heavy energy to positive channels within myself and things I care about (home, family, interests, etc). I cannot force that moment, if it should ever come to pass, but certainly it would make life less complicated. I think all you can do is what you are capable of right now and then soul search for the next level. If you have health issues it is certainly important to not cause yourself extra undue stress in the process.
I’m a Scorpio rising with Leo sun & Sag moon. She’s a Leo sun with a Taurus rising & Scorpio moon. Our charts are flip flopped, basically. My brother in law is a multi Pisces, including sun & moon. Don’t know his rising.
You know, sometimes I think the discomfort is the lesson. You aren’t supposed to be or expected to be able to clean your environment of all challenges. No amount of mantras or forgiveness erases the often inconvenience and discomfort of living. You come to see you are strong enough to cope whether having to cope is just or not. But maybe that’s just my Chiron transit talking : – )
There is always an opening. Yes exactly this.
And Chiron coping and comprehension of limits too.
(Saving on comments by doing 2in 1 lol)
Chiron really is about pain and existential limits and – yes thank you 12 V – how we comprehend this and cope with the situation as it arrives with us. It is a burden and honestly it bows our backs even as it makes us stronger for bearing it.
(That might be a bit dramatic sounding but you know. It’s a growing-up planet.)
Speaking of Chiron, have you seen the movie Moonlight? The main character is named Chiron but in the movie its pronounce “Shy-rone.”
Feng Shui is complicated. West is my “good” direction.
Its hard to say what to do about the conflict without knowing the details. I am not one for fake apologies, especially when the other is batshit crazy. I had some conflicts at work over the past year – one with a Pisces male and one with a toxic female Pisces-rising Scorpio 8th house stellium – and it was extraordinarily uncomfortable but I decided to stay for various reasons. I never would have apologized to her crazy. I dealt by committing myself to do my best where there were openings (in other directions) and a year later, the offending individuals are gone or disempowered. There is always an opening. It may not be in the direction you want or expect, it may be humble or dull, but there is always an opening. If you are meant to deal with her aggressions, the situation will show itself. Otherwise, water what you want to grow.
This is great. I’m very cancerian and hold grudges so easily and enjoy it (for a time), but lately instead of holding onto them I am trying to hold onto possibility of something else…
am clueless re feng shui and am sorry you’re in this situation. psycho-fire pisceans with jealousy issues would be the pits. (hey, maybe lucky no one has Leo rising or moon? otherwise there would be publicity campaigns launched to defend ones position and status?)
(I’m probably not above-it-all enough to say I haven’t been this person (fire fish, not Leo publicity stunt, although that’s skills I truly wish I had), although I think an earth moon and mars in an air sign probably helps me Not Be Too Psycho when it comes to actual interpersonal conflict IRL)
I am coming up with a theory – based on my own experience of insane quantities of envy about a Cancerian lately. This is not a neighbour or friend dispute. I’m wondering if with Neptune – south node – chiron in pisces, and Saturn squaring, that pisceans have actually been truly suffering a Crisis of Faith – in themselves. Cancerians, being cancerians and also undergoing pluto transits, and particularly those who have the scorpy strength added, might be acting as some kind of beacon or Cosmic Lesson (or Reward) for pisces who are seeking some kind of coming-home experience.
What we Fish need to understand however is that the emotional intelligence of Katakans is their – your – own, and to make it our own is not a case of destroying the teacher, rather it is something that we have to patiently and persistently (SATURN) observe (North node tr. virgo) and learn from (Saturn – earthly plane, Chiron – spiritual plane) in order to next-level and strengthen, fortify, what is truly ours – our own suns and identity. you might be onto something , triple kataka re the jealousy being hers,
one thing in these charts etc is not a lot of earth going on. Can Earth help you right now? Grounding and steadiness, I can imagine a Toro NGAF about the doom and just tooling around doing whatever toro’s do when they’re not fazed by fire-watery situ’s.
gotta go but thank you also for the immense stream-of-conscious lesson I juist received as well. XX good luck.
And super beneficial, higher consciousness grist evoking volley, Pi … thank you.
Pi, you have the sweetest, wisest voice. How on earth do you write like that? You ring clear as a bell.
Your suggestion of a Piscean crisis of faith in self is true for me. I don’t have any crabs close by, but am certainly observing the poise and satisfaction with self in others that I feel is lacking in me.
And I laughed sheepishly when I read your comment about psycho-fire pisceans. I am a fishy with triple aries and leo rising and do have to restrain myself when it comes to public campaigning. *cringe*
Thanks. xo
This is weird cause i have a slightly similar scenario. I scored this 60s holiday rental andlet my friend use it for 5 days as a office.
She loved the space so much tried to move in then kept visiting no time given to me to settle. I got grumpy with her next shes at the neighbors caravan trying to get my landlords number from hom to buy this caravan. She turns up yesterday acting like nothings wrong i am so pissed of. But not sure how to deal with it as she obviously is envious!
Bless her and bless all people who are struggling with neighbours. Bless the entire neighbourhood. Suburb, City, State…..XxXx
This too.. when we get caught up, breathe and imagine radiation of peace, forgiveness, and cosmic love, imagine this completely filling up the airspace between you and the Pisces and over-writing the scattered , spiky animosity or whatever the sentiment is. If nothing else this is a quantum re-set or neutralizing of our own psyches, well-wishing on all levels.
And (I’m sorry , mercury must be in overdrive atm) if this is tricky, sometimes I work with something like just imagining blissful sunshine, or a cool, salty sea breeze, anything that is free of “I want” and is a uniform field of something clear/peaceful/refreshing.
Can sympathise with you Kataka as i had 8 years of neighbour conflict. Live in a large house divided into 2 apartments. Me facing east, he facing south if that counts. Tried to alleviate it with acts of courtesy and kindness but that was met with more aggression.
As a sensitive it is so disturbing to your wellbeing to be around conflict as it seeps thro’ the walls being under the same roof. It creates severe anxiety, just hearing his voice even with much counselling from professionals. Alas it was only time that healed it.
Also a fantastic house i didn’t want to give up, tho’ looked at many options. Just had to wear it with help from friends and Myst’s adherents here.
It seriously screws with your Zen and sensitivity to them tends to amplify when no solution is forthcoming.
The visualisation that worked for me was to whitewash that part of the dwelling so it exists not every time it passes it the psyche also playing Mozart continuously or other classical music, using the i-pod when he was home, and Forgiveness mantra-ing on repeat.
The cliche ‘if it doesn’t kill you -it makes you stronger is real. You WILL look back on this. It won’t be a long time if you consider your entire life span.
Sorry only empathy to offer Sweetness.
“The cliche ‘if it doesn’t kill you -it makes you stronger is real. You WILL look back on this. It won’t be a long time if you consider your entire life span.” Truth!