Valentines Day Horoscope For Grinches

Single or pair-bonded, you will not be compelled into force romance just because it’s a day.

Astrologically Valentine’s Day is always 24 degrees of Aquarius, not an especially goo-goo part of the Zodiac. Twenty-four Aquarius is more superhero in disguise normcore composure, aloofness and a quiet preference for solitude.

So it’s not like the astrology is going to inspire sentimental gestures. Why join the dining dead in restaurants across the country? If your relationships in trouble, Valentine’s Day dinner is a formula for terseness, tears, and existential crisis.

The variety of loneliness you feel when you’re out or in bed with someone supposedly your life partner is far worse than anything you can experience when you’re alone.

Feeling isolated but crowded is an experience unique to jails and unhappy marriages. If you’re super in love, you’ll be just as happy staying home together and waiting for a tremendous astrological date to celebrate your fabulous union.

Check the Moon Calendar for one of those or get a Love Warp 9 report with all the best Venusian times on it.

If solo, your Valentine’s Day Horoscope is simple. Relish your freedom and recommit to a healthy relationship with yourself. The ability to be happy alone with yourself is an indicator of spiritual health.

We can fake many things in this life – longer hair, interest in a tedious conversation to be polite – but intimacy must not be one of them.

87 thoughts on “Valentines Day Horoscope For Grinches”

  1. Hahaha.. Mystic I ain’t gonna try and out ‘grinch’ you but I’m certainly going to concur. Yes.. that’s all I have to say. I’ll read everybody else’s comments tomorrow or not (no offence) because ultimately I couldn’t give a toss about this overly focussed day on a forced dose of prescribed love for the primary gain of all business (and yeah, sorry to small local biz) or to heighten the have/have not view or to [insert anything else I’ve omitted]. Hmmm.. where was I….?? Oh, that’s right, done 🙂

  2. Just walked home from my yoga class thru the local cafe strip. The Dining Dead (thankyou Mystic, spot on as always) were out in force. Bogan couples as far as the eye can see. I love love and romance and all that but for fuq’s sake, my Leo rising/Mars in Virgo say, if you’re gonna wear sky-high strappy shoes a) learn to walk gracefully in them and b) pumice

  3. Nah I feel exactly the same Mystic! Load of bollocks! Can’t stand the commercial crap. Just as well anyway as bf completely forgot until I reminded him jokingly – at least we’re on the same page with that.

  4. My Taurus Husband was The Grinch. He didn’t start off that way – it just kind of developed over time. Eventually he realised how hurtful his attitude (and pompous speeches on why he doesn’t have to bend to society’s will and participate in celebrations of any kind) could be, and last year he actually had a dozen roses delivered to me on my birhday and gave me some lovely jewellery at Christmas.

    This morning he said that he knew I wasn’t really into Valentine’s Day (which is true) but he was sorry he hadn’t organised anything and just held me. I was very surprised and delighted just the same. It isn’t about the material things – it’s about showing love and affection. My Grinch seems to be finally getting it!

    1. Join you in a mo Thiisisme. VD bah humbug! ‘All I get is sweet text from a lovely man I’m not interested in. We had the “I just wanna be friends” talk about 2 weeks ago but it didn’t work obviously. I got a ” I’m all alone’ return tex from him’ aaaaagh talk about cringe.
      I am on the other side of the fence being persured by an unsuitable suitor while my heart yearns for another who is not valentine orientated. oh well to the couch I go

  5. Self love all the way and a big open heart w love for all beings : ) especially the most challenging ones, I’m too busy on the mars in Virgo tangent to even notice Valentines this year, though my novel has a gorgeous romance that I simply can’t wait to read every night : ) big love atchya xxx

  6. I wouldn’t call myself grinchy as much as unaware or genuinely disinterested? I didn’t even realise it was Valentine’s today until I had to write the date on something for work lol.

    Not loved up atm but definitely not bitter at not having someone. In fact, when I was loved up I tended to get annoyed at Valentine’s not for the commercialism or anything but because the presents I got were token things like flowers and chocolates and I’d always look at them and smile but really, *really* wish they’d been something I actually wanted like books or a trip somewhere or… well, anything remotely relevant to me!

  7. My objection to Valentines day as it is now, is that it perpetuates the heterosexual couples myth. And I don’t agree that only people in those relationships are happy, an they only way they can express this is through insincere declarations of love. It mandates the way love can be expressed. And it sets people (mainly women) up for disapointment when their significant other (usually men) get it somehow “wrong”. Saying this however, on my lunch walk today I saw a couple sharing a picnic with glasses of bubbles in the city botanic gardens, and they were laughing and talking and enjoying each other. They looked gorgeous. Conversely, I was greeted upon entry at work this morning by a bleached babe handing out heart shaped chocolates to everyone coming into the building…. WHY??? WTF? Fortunately is was good quality choc. Or I’m so prementrual I just don’e care….

    1. That will be my excuse too should I get handed chocolate today. I will be hoarding it and taking it for “medicinal purposes” to help my PMS this week. And if I don’t get any (which is far more likely) I plan to make myself some fudgy raspberry brownies either way. 😛

  8. I’ve decided NOT to be grinchy – but to subvert this consumerist pair bonded event in to something that is meaningful and relevant to me.

    Today I’m celebrating having developed enough self love to only feel a fleeting moment’s anxiety about not having a ‘partner’.

    I’m celebrating the love I have to give – and the variety of ways that I can manifest that without a partner – with friends, relatives, pets and even complete strangers.

    I’m celebrating self approval and the gift of independence that my grandmothers would have killed for.

    I did succuumb to consumerism – I bought myself a beautiful bunch of cream and pink tinged roses. Better than chocolates. I’ll head off to the gym and work on my physical fitness tonight – but after 47 years of feeling a ‘lack’ in my life because of being single – today I celebrate the richness and fullness of my single life and the fact that finally I don’t want to be anyone else but me.

  9. The only good thing about Valentines is sending secret I fancy you like crazy cards (heaps of scorpio in me). The rest of teh time we should just come out and say it (ie the next daya!)

  10. I don’t care enough to Grinch it up this year. I really don’t. I’m just going to go fucking hide. Just wake me when it’s over.

    I look forward to expensive Valentines candy like Godiva being marked down to half off in 2 more days.

  11. Perhaps if the date was moved to July or September or even April it may resonate better.
    A day in Aquarius for declaring romantic love was poor planning.
    More likely just a product of commerce wanting to extend xmas spending period into the financial 3rd quarter.

    Love the term Dining Dead!

    And 🙂 to you falling in love , MM. You deserve such beautiful things . Xx

  12. don’t read this if you’re a romantic please…

    this morning i woke up feeling more like Valdemort about Valentine’s Day…

    the night before i was reading Barbara Watters’ Sex and the Outer Planets and what she said about Neptune, how it can sometimes promise more than it delivers in the end…and was then thinking about the whole fantasy of romance, how it captivates the human soul and my own so, but while doing so, conveniently blocks out so much of real world issues of relationships and real give and take in relationships that work

    my ideas about traditional long-term relationships are pretty well shattered, especially now that i’m also reading Sex At Dawn by Ryan and Jetha…it’s all good though…my ideas about relationships are in the process of being calibrated on new paradigms i would say…

    Was feeling a bit of a lonesome illusion this morning…got nice flowers from ex of all people and a card saying happy valentines ‘friend’…was kind to him anyway like usually am…

    then saw gay Pisces friend who’s been unceremoniously dumped by Aries gay girl lover…Absolutely heartbroken she is because she thought she’d found a life partner…Going over tonight to keep her company, she had no idea it was coming and was only telling me a week or so ago how fabulous she felt her life was now, after having so much grief and heartache in her life and losing her adult son too…

    I don’t feel the slightest bit sorry for myself at all…To love is to suffer indeed, sometimes, maybe always, it’s just deferred by time.

    Anyway, still doesn’t stop me from being invincibly happy no matter what, life is good, very good mostly…i don’t need Valentines…just my friends and my health, food and shelter and well, living with something worthwhile to do that’s beautiful in some small way.

  13. I loathe people’s smugness, waving their cheap crappy VD items in your face…like they WANT you to shove them up their arse!! I hate weddings too.

    I try & hide if the cheesy stuff is given to me, I’d rather a meaningful kiss or cunninglus.

    1. Savannah.. Saggi if I recall correct? I’m Saggi.

      So.. I wasn’t going to read/post after my mini download but I saw this.. ‘waving their…… VD items’ .. and I lost it!! 🙂

      Yes.. I’ll happily take either of the options you’ve thrown up for consideration provided I won’t be waving a VD item around shortly thereafter!! LOL!

  14. Great post Triple Air Gem!!

    “I find it sad that we have to be so anti the sentiment of being loving towards others!”

    Well said! 🙂

  15. Im grinched up… I got pseudo dumped 2 days ago and then today said jerk tells me im his Valentine….. THEN another ex calls to tell me his is engaged and maybe i should try being a Lesbian…. I just sent a msg to all my Fab girlfriends saying ‘Fuqin hate valentines BUT love you all’….. feel like smashing something!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    1. wtf??? an ex calls you the day before valentines to say he’s engaged and you should try being a lesbian????
      Douche bag.

    2. if you feel like smashing something go to it with crockery in a car park on concrete floor! pound em plates into the ground. car parks echo – so the smashing really gets the crap out; crockery on concrete gives a fabulous smash. i haven’t done this, virgo friend has though.. i usually just exercise – running.


  16. Well…actually…..they’re very expensive and delicious chocolates, and it’s a RED heart-shaped box. I told my Saggo friend I wanted some and I’d use his money. ‘Cuz Valentine’s Day is about love: love of chocolate, love of self, love of other people’s money.

    I told him I’d share.

  17. Piscean Closed for Renovation

    uh, hello? not in love with anyone. there, since i agree with you one everything else, I just out-grinched you. (It’s my competitive venus in Aries y’see) xx

  18. I’m guessing it’s the The Knight of Pentacles from a few cards picked a while ago – a young Toro perhaps, and Congrats on falling in love Mystic .. xx

  19. I’m with you TAG. Multi-Gem here.

    Usually I’m comfortably in the grinch camp for all ‘the days’ (Christmas, Mothers’, Fathers’, Val’s etc), but I’ve noticed this tendency to dis them doesn’t really feel that good either.

    The supermarket shelves and shop windows definitely get under my skin, but staying away or focusing elsewhere is not usually all that hard.

    Perhaps some people need a kind of ‘permission’ to express their love (that these designated days provide). And if it makes someone else’s day, great. Maybe it could even give them a taste of something … different?

    Anyway, here’s to openheartedness – all year round!

  20. Whether i am in a happy relationship or not, i have always felt kinda indifferent about valentine’s day. I think it’s superficial … forced … a money makin business strategy that has worked out quite well for hallmark.

  21. Valentine’s Day *can* be a great excuse to revel in pretty red things (hearts, flowers, sunsets) & life-giving relationships, with or without the consumerism, as one so chooses. Or it can suck. The key is, as so many have said, to make it one’s own. Or not. 🙂

  22. “Oh and LOL stupid astrology for Valentines Day: Moon in Scorpio with Venus square Pluto. Sexy as fuq but total Grudge Flashpoint so good luck to peeps hoping a few mouldy chocolates in a heart shaped pink box & gypsophila wreathed scent-free roses.”

    my natal placements. some people don’t know how to work gravitas. LOL

    And no, I am not a Valentine’s grinch. I treat it like any other day…a day to show my dear that I love them.

  23. I can’t even grinch! I want to be in a happy, healthy relationship that celebrates St. V’s! Not sure why, though. My Aqua Venus doesn’t seem to agree with the idea of wubby holidays. Or maybe it’s become so normal to hate St. V’s that I’m being a free-spirted non-conformist in love by adoring it? 😉

    1. Also – lol – I’m starting personal therapy on Valentine’s Day. Nurturing and appreciating the best relationship, I say optimistically.

  24. I think Valentine’s Day is a lovely day when you’re with someone awesome… But I think many of us, through good old life experience, have lost that fairy tale view of relationships and are more realistic about things (and I think in the end this is a good thing)… It can feel great to be with someone, it can feel mediocre to be with someone and it can feel sh*tty to be with someone. Relationships are tricky things to be good at!

    I will admit that a while earlier I wished my ex and his new gf would each get a big ole steaming turd for VD Day 😉 But I am going to disentangle from mass consciousness views that I should be lonely today, eat a bit of chocolate and have a nice day 🙂 You can be alone and not be lonely. For now, I will relish my freedom to do whatever I want whenever I want. And google Ryan Gosling and daydream 😉

  25. Too funny….
    Valentines Day is yet another of ‘those’ days on my cynical Scorpy Sh*t List.
    Yet today Leo ex rocks up outta nowhere all goo-goo eyed and whatever – “can’t we just do the friends with benefits thing again…?”
    AND an e-mail from the ghost of cyber-crush past…

  26. My Sag friend posted on FB that this was the first Valentine’s Day in 6 years on which she would be without a man, and she was thanking one of her many male friends (who’s probably obsessed with her) for the flowers and candy. I wanted to throw a pie in her face.

    The object of my Valentine’s Day obsession is a Famous Actor and his absurdly funny tweets….THERE IS NO OTHER FOR ME.

    How’s that for grinchy?

    1. Haha! I think you’re on to something there SourPatch. FB is sorely in need of a “Pie in the Face” button. It would have so many varied applications. 😀

  27. Recently ended my 16 year marriage to a grinch who never believed in anything – not valentines, anniversaries, birthdays or christmases. He didn’t even aid my kids to buy cards or pressies for me, not even for mother’s day. 🙁
    He claimed he didn’t like being dictated to, but never attempted to be spontaneous nor romantic any other time either.
    Bah humbug to all that, I hate valentines too, but I am hoping the next man who comes into my life is in possession of a big heart and can show his love, not be afraid of intimacy and believe in romance because that is what I totally crave now.

    1. Know how you feel – the Aqua-Ex was a slackarse when it came to giving (and alot of other things!). One birthday I didn’t even get a card – my “present” was him giving the baby his late night bottle for me. Gee, thanks mate. Apparently he was too busy to buy a card. When he did make an effort it was very clear that he knew absolutely nothing about me. I think that’s the main thing with gifts – it’s not how much you spend, or whatever, it’s the thought that goes into it – and how unoriginal is flowers and chocs and red lovey things on VD (love it!). Everyone is told what they are expected to do/perform/give – a nice neat little consumerist parcel. 🙂

    1. I think MM needs a bio – I don’t even know her sign. Don’t want to take away the Mystery but would be nice to see your face.

  28. BTW i KNOW that the date is now saying Feb 15 when it’s not. This is the new ‘time machine’ feature of the site.

    BUT seriously, it will be resolved with the server migration so soz if it causes any cognitive dissonance

  29. I’ve never understood this day. More consumerism. Really really tacky consumerism that actually makes my stomach turn. Ex gave me a card one year that was all squishy squelchy lovey-dovey-bubsy-wubsy vomit and I swear I shuddered with revulsion.

    I’m a Happy Bachelorette at the mo and don’t need any of the cliched b.s. that my friends are inflicting on ‘loved ones’ or are being inflicted with. The really sad thing is that they feel SORRY for me! Me!! “Aww, you don’t have a boyfriend. You must really hate today. Do you want to have one of my roses?” Ahhhhh!

    Having a gal pal over for dinner (with me not even remembering the significance of Feb 14th) until she said “This is great! Now we won’t be alone for Valentine’s Day night!” Almost wanted to cancel just to prove a point.

    BUT just when I thought I had my grinchy-ness all sorted, my Scorp friend who found love last year (and is pregnant and blissfully happy and has been smothered in flower petals and chocolates and gourmet whatevers today) posted a simple declaration of love to her man on facebook – and i had a pang of envy!!! A horrid, gut-wrenching split second of weakness when I wished i had a Great Love (plus baby) showering me with cliched tokens of affection.

    Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! Spare me!!

  30. I’m in a failed relationship. It had been dying for years. I have only stayed for the love of my children. When she began cheating on me about a year or so ago, that is when the camel’s back broke.

    Today, I finally have enough to hire a lawyer and pay off some credit cards. Honestly, the most vindictive element of my Scorpio nature would love to serve her papers on Valentines day, and later be seen with a beautiful woman!

    What I will do is play it calm, cool, test the weather to see if a card will keep the peace. I will be visiting said lawyer soon, and may even be in a situation where she will not contest my terms(which everyone thinks are too generous). I just want it out and over with before I want to sting. More eagle than phoenix I think. Though I am trying to take the high ground. My children need a good father, and yeah they do need her. So I have to leave on at least decent terms with her.

    I’ll buy some chocolates and candies at the after-sale.

    1. Hang in there CRB. Sounds like you’re doing great.

      FYI – being a child in a family where your parents are together but miserable is more damaging than if they separate and are both happy. Provided they play nice re custody of course. Kids definitely need their Dad. Definitely.

      Keep going CRB

      1. I agree with Gemstar. My parents were locked in a horrid marriage and were horrid to each other which made my childhood horrid. Their bickering and misery ruined my life too. My brother and I wanted them to divorce and always said two happy homes would be better than one miserable one.

        Good luck to you! Your head sounds like it’s screwed on right!

    2. Gosh, CRB. I feel for you. Card yes. Chocs and Sweets, NO. Seriously? That’s like flogging yourself.

      Unless you’re lacing it with something…? 🙂 Kidding. Ok I know this is me and technically, I’m only half kidding. You’ll be ok, you’re right to wait and get your kids secure while you go through this change and who knows? By the time you cross that hurdle, you may be having way too much fun to even think of revenge. Or at least have to intend it.

      1. Have to agree with FA. A simple card, nothing overly mushy or romantic that has a kind message (especially when hand written) shows that you put in a genuine effort into trying to “play nice”.

        As a fellow Scorpio who’s been cheated on I can empathize with the struggle to be the Eagle and not resort to the urge to sting! Cause it’s there and it’s strong and despite our best intentions it’s not going away.

        Forget the after V-day candies as they will likely all be crap and already stale. If you have young kids get them something sweet and then treat yourself to something special.for taking the Scorp high road. Cheaters don’t deserve chocolate!

  31. LOL! Yes, the whole thing is kind of cringe worthy really. And it’s really annoying because it’s harder to get a seat at my fav wine bar when it’s Valentine’s Day. I’m like ‘It’s Tuesday! All go home! Now!’.

  32. Normally i am very grinchy, i haven’t been with someone on Valentine’s day for 6 years and even when i have been it was something I always played down. I also remember making an effort one year, new dress, dinner at an expensive restaurant and it was a complete disaster with us yelling at eachother before the meals arrived and me leaving in tears. Completely horrific

    This year I have to admit i’m a bit starry eyed. A new lover is coming over and i’m cooking him dinner. It’s the 4th time we’ve caught up in a week and a half and I’m really looking forward to spending time with him. I’m getting very domestic and having fun planning the details from dessert to sexy underwear.

    Also have to confess to oracle abuse, apparently he’s thinking sleazy thoughts about me and adores me but it may not be practical. Seriously, Indian from a well to do family and 13 years younger? Not practical? Sheesh. 🙂

    1. you know it’s very likely I’d be doing this tonight even if it wasn’t Valentine’s day- they cancelled life drawing classes this week. So maybe I still am grinchy?? 🙂

  33. I dropped a lover who took me out for a surprise Valentine’s Day dinner. At the door of the (very expensive – book months ahead) restaurant. When asked why: “Because I hate the whole concept of Valentine’s Day”. Nuff said.

  34. Mystic, I love you (whoops, not grinchy enough??). I’m a seething viper today thanks to this ridiculous occasion. I live in Australia. This absurd ‘holiday’ is supposed to fly under the radar in this country. It certainly has in the past. But no. Not this year. Not when I’m suffering from my first truly broken heart. In 2012, it seems that Valentine’s Day is on everyone’s lips.

    Speaking of lips, mine haven’t been kissed since my heart was broken last year by a Disappearing Uranian, who’s probably living it up with a smokin’ hottie today courtesy of a fickle heart and avoidant personality.

    1. Dear Curious,

      Ah, the broken heart we can’t do much with. I could go pithy with time heals all wounds blah blah.. which btw is only half true. Some wounds do not heal. Ever. BUT, it does not excuse you from addressing your un-kissed state.

      Distractions and dalliance won’t un-break your heart, not at all. Joy and delight however, can significantly crank up your pheromone production to where you can hither forth more worthy candidates who can little by little, patch up the said cracked little organ. Sigh. I have no pat answers, except to give Valentine’s day the finger.

      I just had this conversation with the Virgo Saxophonist I’m sort of seeing who confessed shame for having not got over his first major heart break almost a DECADE ago. Linger much? I can understand that. All I could say was that a broken heart is like a bloody red chair in the middle of an empty stage, you’ve got to get other characters and props in, in fact build a different world around it to put it in perspective. Until one day, it’s less bloody and just more robust.

      Uranians incidentally are total orbit fuqers. At least mine were. If you like this one, best you ignore him like it was your Ops Mission. For some reason, that’s like flipping catnip to them. Hmm. hugs.

      1. Brilliant advice FA, def something to think about. Ive been a la solo for a couple of years now post ex… and as tempting as the other fun props sound… im exploring building up rels with friends and fam to knock that red chair into orbit (well knock so fast it gets obliterated so that energy is gone once an for all)… so the stage is clear for a very fine performance.

      2. Hotsolutely, Lyouke! And may I just say that building rels with friends and fam is not mutually exclusive from entertaining fun props, when it arises of course.

        Love is an energy. I do think that when it comes to romantic love, we want it to be the whole ocean right away. Nothing wrong with long as we acknowledge that it can also come in waves. Sometimes we’re not quite ready for the big thing immediately and the Universe does find ways to prep us.

      3. Curious Cancerian

        Hi Fallen,

        Wow, thank you so, so much for your lovely words. They weren’t pat at all, and it means a lot that you put so much thought into them.

        I’m sure you’re right about bringing more props into my life, and I think part of the problem has been that this coincided with lots of friends moving away. But I have big plans for this year, so hopefully things will change 🙂

        Best of luck with your Virgo Saxophonist – I bet you’re just the woman to help him move on! Thanks again lovely xoxo

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