Inconvenient Truths Of The Zodiac

Twelve Vital Zodiac Facts

Because barely anyone wants to acknowledge them, the inconvenient truths of the zodiac get very little air-time.  Let’s change that.

*Aries are irritating – the pushiness, their self-centered anecdotes – but they’re practically always courageous.

* Virgos outnumber every other sign.  September 9 –  when the Sun is 16 degrees of Virgo –  is the most popular birth date on the planet.

*People saying they’re Ophiuchus are Sagittarians craving more esoteric cool or who were aiming to be Scorpios.

*Aquarians will only ever get quality empathy or support from other Aquarians – everyone else categorizes their conduct as either “aloof” or “crazy.”

Capricorns Are Judging You

*Capricorns are judging you but it’s for your own good, to fine tune your integration with them and ensure that any advice offered fits your needs.

*Taurus people are excellent in bed – if you don’t mind the crumbs – and consciously use that to cover for deficits in other areas.

*Dampness affects Sagittarians more than any other sign, regardless of which hemisphere they were born in and responsibility can bring them out in an actual physical rash.

*Leos always have an ‘invisible audience’ in mind – not in a pathological way, it’s just part of their process – and yes they care about that more than you.

Scorpios Know 70% More About You Than You Think

*Scorpios will only reveal 30% of their information dossier on you – the rest is classified. No, there is no ‘freedom of information’ request.

*If you’re dealing with a Gemini in any scenario whatsoever, diversion is nearly always the most effective tactic.

*Librans – followed by Cancerians – are the most likely signs to become billionaires and nobody knows why.

*Pisces people have the power of prophecy but they’ll tell you they read it in some reputable journal.


Image: The Tenant – 1976

34 thoughts on “Inconvenient Truths Of The Zodiac”

  1. Libras and Cancerians – arguably the best networkers. That plus the cardinal energy for the big bucks. Libra is king of negotiating. And cancerians don’t own those crab claws for nothing.

  2. My gorgeous bro was born September 9th, he would have rolled his eyes so hard to learn it is the most common birthday. Just one more way he would blend with the wall paper, like always! But then it became a life skill. In truth his Scorpio Moon kept everything classified because his Aqua Asc already had him being regarded as aloof and crazy. Eg. his successful strategy when trying to get away without a ticket on public transport was to bore the ticket inspector to death. He would mumble really quietly a long story about how he thought he had his wallet etc etc. until after asking what he was on about and him politely rambling they would throw their hands up in the air and walk off. Actually this post enlightens me to a few things about him!

    1. Yes it’s given me insight into my brother too. We all grew up swimming everywhere we could find water – creek, ocean, *drains* – not healthy but we didn’t care, except my Sagg bro who hated water and was later, I believe, traumatised by being thrown into the sea for survival training in armed forces, then locked in solitary in Washington state in Winter with periodic hose downs. We are lost to each other now, he is veering hard right as he ages and I’m going the other way. It makes me sad.

  3. You know what I find to be an inconvenient astrological fact? C.P.E. Bach, Mozart and Beethoven ALL have Moon in Saggitarius! What IS this genius magical, music Moon? Why Saggitarius? Is it so athletic a business to write music? So much fire in these great composers.

  4. If any other Aquarian would like to chat, drop a message below. You’ll never be judged for being crazy, haha. I married an Aqua rising, and our conversations would make even the most die-hard nerd think we were weird.

  5. Virgo: because Christmas, new year & alcohol.

    Taurus: great in bed unless they’ve included drugs along with their hobnob habit ..

    (Experienced on both counts)

  6. Laugh laugh laugh reading my sun, rising and moon – correct and funny, thanks Mystic for brightening the air! Xxx

  7. It’s just easier to say it’s from a reputable journal a) people tend to be more open to ingesting it if it’s from “proven science” and b) as Sophia says below, they then won’t pay too much attention to us. A pisces worst nightmare is being locked in a padded cell or being experimented on in a lab. Gotta keep up appearances of being 100% a-grade human.

  8. Fantastic bit of levity (albeit true, so true) to lighten my morning. Now, off to hustle for some of those billions… Thanks Mystic 😀 X

  9. “Pisces people have the power of prophecy but they’ll tell you they read it in some reputable journal” .

    See we do this in order to lessen the gaze on us while we quietly watch as people become freaked out.

  10. Have to say your appraisal is bang on for this Leo. I frequently refer to myself in the third person and my friends call me on it. I tell them it’s branding.

    Something about that photo really speaks to me.

  11. I have an aqua Leo rising as my significant male. I’ve never felt that he loves me. He’s way too in love with himself first and can’t be arsed with the mundane ‘love you” crap. And my daughter the cappi has judgement as her first name. It was her second name but she changed it to more reflect her personally.
    and me.. a billionaire. Hahahaha. I’m still working on that.

  12. Fuq! i must be doing something seriously wrong – i’m a Crab with Libra Rising & my finances are shrinking out of existence.

    1. Yes I snorted my coffee at that. Oh would I love a million or possibly a few hundred of them in the bank. But my NN is in Taurus and that I’m afraid is where this life’s work is. Try try try try. Fail fail fail fail. Try try try. Fail fail fail. Talk about rollercoaster.

      1. My SN is in Taurus and I’m all, can I please go back to whatever cake-abundant existence was wealthy, roomy, sexy, luxurious and draped in velvet at all times? Instead I have to transform and confront my demons on a daily basis in a sixth-house existence with my Scorpio NN.

      2. Oh dear, let’s just hope your ship comes in soon, emg. My friend with NN/2nd House, is also always financially challenged at every turn, despite being a very capable & qualified person too.

        I have NN Libra/12H. All I want are the simple things in life, in style. Is that too much to ask for, ffs?

  13. I agree with the inconvenient truths of a Gemini, diversion will get you everywhere with a gem 😏

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