How To Understand A Virgo Male?

Mystic advises a multiple conjunct Aries who is having problems deciphering the intentions of a Virgo male she is (sort of) seeing.

Dear Mystic,

Please help – I am completely confused by the actions of a Virgo man I have just met. He has nearly every planet in Virgo, and I am a multiple conjunct Aries.

He lives abroad, and I’m moving overseas in three weeks (I met him literally on his last night in town), we held hands and kissed.

When we met he had been flirting with me all night very obviously and when he had to leave to go back to his friend’s house. He blurts out that I have to get a layover in Germany, and upon realizing that wasn’t possible decided immediately he would fly to me wherever I was as soon as possible.

Which is, I guess, NOT Virgo-like at all, but I could be wrong. All I know is, we were kissing, I felt this weirdly pure, perfect feeling, told him this (“I can’t stop kissing you”) then he mumbled, “This is getting out of hand,” and quietly disengages himself, refuses to look at me, lets go of my hand last, and bolts.

Anyway, this was about two months ago, and since then he writes to me… every other Sunday. On-the-dot. I think one day he’d forgotten because I got an email from him at what would have been 3 AM Monday, 9 PM Sunday mine.

I’d tried writing him spontaneously in his language even, off-schedule, to try and spur something out of him… Nothing. I suspect he’ll be writing to me in a few days, as this is an “every other Sunday” week. If he doesn’t, then that’s that.

How do I deal with this? I’m 100% on a schedule. He still talks about visiting me; his last letter was REALLY heavy on that. If he sparked when we kissed etc., I’ve honestly no idea at this point. I’ve never been pursued in this way before. I’m used to Cancers, or any fire sign in the chart, or… hell, even Pisces. Gemini.

But what is this Virgo doing? Is he just feeling me out obsessively? Is he serious?

Aries Amazon.

Dear Aries Amazon,

This seems to me to be blazingly obvious. Of COURSE, Virgo likes you. You have made his schedule!Β 

If you wanted someone, you would swoop in Aries The Conqueror style to capture his heart and set out the parameters of his new life in the Ariesarchy, but Virgo peeps are different. They don’t like to seem vulgar, forward, or like they are assuming anything.

I know Virgos who don’t wear scent because they don’t like to impose.Β  So why not just say you will be at X Destination on a specific date and suggest you meet? I think you should wait till April when Mercury has cleared this Retrograde in his opposite sign.

You don’t want to be part of his funk; you want to be part of the solution.

The Virgo male hates to assume. I think he is waiting for a “go” signal. That or he is interested in having pen-pals, which seems odd.Β 

And Venus currently aspecting Uranus, Jupiter, Saturn, et al. (see your Horoscopes for more deets) makes now till Fri epic timing for such a strongly worded hint.

What does everyone else think?

124 thoughts on “How To Understand A Virgo Male?”

  1. WOW~~ similar story here!!!
    i met this Virgo man couple mths ago… he was in my city for Biz trip…. we had an instant attraction!!!!!!!!! just like what u exp….!! I wasn’t going to let myself get too involved (i’m a rational Taurus!) until his biz trip turned into a mth thing… so.. I let myself go… we had an amazing time… he’s sweet, caring, fun n charming!! Then when i asked him “is it just for fun, or could be sth serious?”… he said “let’s just enjoy it…”… can’t say i wasn’t all emotional abt it, but i accepted it… then he left, out of touch for like 3 weeks n not really replying my msg…
    THEN…….. he visited me beginning of this mth…. unexpectedly… said he wanted to have a vacation… if he could visit n stay with me….my city is a stop over to his travel destination (my hometown), and he would like to get some tourism tips from me in person…. hmmmm…. I agreed n we again had a great time together….. I even made an impulsive decision to travel to his city to visit him in the coming week…. !! he’s happy abt my visit… he made plans for us already~~ so… let’s see how it goes… but he’s NOT very communicative n responding my msgs…. usually takes him days to reply me!! πŸ™
    I told him clearly that i liked him more than fds….. he just said his “whereabouts” is a concern n doesn’t really show me his feeling too much… thou he likes to cuddle n kisses me a lot… CONFUSING virgo!!
    His very virgo – Sun, Mercury, Venus… and Moon + Mars in Cancer!!!
    Good luck with ur Virgo man!! πŸ™‚

    1. My Virgo man who lives 8971miles apart from me stays in contact with me through texts and Faeroe. He is not that responsive with text messages But he talks a lot on facetime. He confuses me Sometimes because he is very possessive and domineering emotionally, I had asked for a break up before But apologizes and put in effort to be more communicative and loving through texts and Facetone. It’s hard to understand a Virgo’s moods

  2. Oh my gosh reading this gave me goose bumps! When I met my Man it was instant but so unlike anything either of us had experienced. We met while I was on holiday and we didn’t even kiss but there was something. Do exactly what Mystic said. Let him meet you in April. Oh my gosh I’m so excited for you! And in the meantime, from the moment I met my Man I had this voice clear as God in my head saying “Be cool Mel, be cool.” so I pass it on, “be cool” not as in cold but you know, be the cool, sexy, amesome Aries you who knows that everything that’s meant to be works out perfectly! Woo hoo! So excited for you!

  3. i went thro the virgo wringer ONCE. that was enough. it took a long time to get over it. The one i knew was emotionally dishonest and adept at pinning it on me as a form of defence. this guy is not even in the same country as you and the writing is just another form of fuqing you over emotionally.

  4. hiddendragonqueen

    this all gives me so much insight into virgo moon man whom i scared off with impatience and impulsivity. i’ve been so sad about it, but in actuality, it’s for the best. because truly, how is this behavior in any way ok in the slightest? it’s really, really not.

  5. I was married to a virgo..they do things on their own time which to us regular fold is a lifetime..
    plus are you sure you can deal with this kind of thing for too long, what with all that aries fire?
    it is gonna be hard because he is most likely sexy, earthy and an awesome lover! But, you will want out eventually, I suspect..

  6. “you made his schedule”

    I knew it was love when my 4 planet virgo leo ex (merc conjunct saturn, venus conjunct mars) made me my very own colour in his scheduler. I was the only person that thought this was deeply romantic.

    1. Wow!

      I’m dating a 4 planet virgo, Leo sun, too! He’s not that organized as to live by a schedule but he calls his parents on Sundays like clockwork and gets scared when I’m not home “on time” from the gym or work.

      To deal with Virgo, I feel as if you have to have the patience of a saint but in their weird quirky way they are worth it. Super caring in a practical mother/father kind of way.

      What can I say? I have Virgo in the 4th and multiple Kataka. They’re a little irritating in their slowness to things (I have a full first house) but I really do appreciate their calculated concern.

  7. I had my heart hurt by a Virgo man. His non committing intentions revealed after sexual consummation. very loyal to those already in his life, not able to be loyal to newcomer me.

    Also I am multiple Virgo. I once told my live in partner I would not wait for him if he did a 3 month internship interstate, as I need the daily togetherness.

    Also, I would never define FORTNIGHTLY contact from a man as courtship. FORTNIGHTLY! = grooming you for dirty weekends maybe? . A Virgo would not pick someone for long term who is not a very good practical fit, surely?

    Or maybe you’re about to have a true romance. Let us know.

  8. Has a 2 hour telephone interstate telephone call with Virgo first boyfriend
    (from when 17 years old – 22) yes,we are still in touch, every 2-3 months and have a glass of vino & spliff whilst talking, one way to have a ‘date’ i guess.
    Said he was going to South America next week for a month, visiting Manchu Piccu. Jokingly said STAY THERE and i will meet you there.
    He replied ‘well if you were still with me you would be going’.
    Since his inheritance, HE’S the one travelling O/S yearly, dammit.
    BUT Virgo’s & Sagg don’t really get along stunningly, still says i’m too fast, talk too much. Yes..criticism, subtle put downs, competitive almost.
    Wanted to give me his schedule btw πŸ™‚
    But hey, he pointed Jupiter out to me, after my sadness about friends and said ‘go outside & look to the North, and that’s how he won me aeons ago by explaining how starlight reaches earth.
    Asked me once if he was the reason i never married (ego huh?), actually YES…lol.

    Not the best person to give advice re the Virgins.

  9. Hon, you don’t need a man that talks about seeing you. You need one that just does it. He’s seen enough to know how gorgeous you are. But is rightly reticent that your life plan doesn’t appear to include him at the moment.
    Sure, you can do the slow build, but that should be more like spontaneous communications with no mention of visits given you are in different places for now. His controlled communication is torture to an Aries.
    I would just stop writing to him and see if he comes back in the future. And what’s with all this writing. Phone at least. God, definitely torture an Aries. Action and results please.

  10. Ummmm why don’t you just ask him why he sends an email bang on queue every second Sunday? Why not just ask – hey where is this going, are you married/in another relationship? Ask directly why’s he’s being all evasive and if he continues to be so I’d just tell him to bugger off.

    Now … a dating question for you lot. I went on this date on Sunday – seemingly nice guy (Saggo with Cancer Asc, Cap Venus/Moon). Thing is I noticed his hands were shaking … like visibly!! Why would that be? Nerves? Amphetamine habit? Found it really odd as his outer personna seemed relatively confident.

      1. Yeah? I’ve never come across it before …at first thought perhaps I was doing something to terrify him. Major incongruency there …

      2. Pisces with Sagg Rising

        I knew a woman once whose hands shook constantly. I thought it was because she was highly strung but it turned out it was because of medication for migraines.

      3. Alcohol too as it drains the B’s for nerves, yet have noticed in the healthiest of peeps too.

        Hold his hand to stop the shaking is all you need to do : -)

      4. That was my first thought, alcohol dependence/withdrawal shakes – huge signpost prowls. Have known high achievers/perfect lifers with this symptom and later found out massive alcohol issues.

      5. Multiple Sclerosis, Parkinson’s Diseasse, Hyperthyroidism, and Hypoglycemia can also cause hand tremors. There is also a condition known as Benign Essential Tremor in which the cause for the shaking is not known.

        There are plenty of legitimate medical reasons for shaky hands beyond nerves and drug dependence.

        My hands have been very shaky the last few months (still waiting on a diagnosis) and I’m so self-conscious about people thinking I am a druggie or a nervous wreck, lol.

    1. Ummm, why don’t you just ask him? πŸ˜‰ If he’s a nice guy, you gotta go in for round 2, right?

      ps nice to see you here. I miss the old timers.

      1. rofl!!!! …. I promise I’m not at all scary in real life … well so long as you’re not put off by an extremely direct conversational styel and smarty pants jokes! πŸ˜‰

      2. Well I kinda met you once for real online, do you remember? (is that for real??). Anyways, you are not scary, just an awesome real person. xxo

      3. Course I remember! And yeah the alcohol thing was something I thought about but a. he looked way too healthy to be that much of an alcoholic and b. the date was an 8am breakfast on a Sunday. Could be asthma medication. Or just that I am so gobsmackingly awesome! hahaha

  11. If there is anything this double toro raised by a Virgo grandma is virgo’s : )
    My deep love virgo. Dear friends Virgo.

    He likes you man! He likes you alot. Virgo’s are socially elegant and refined. He is wooing you correctly : )
    He is not going to jump in like a crazed Aries ( : ) ) and have a passionate affair and then divorce (because things wern’t properly explored/ analysed or communicated authentically first) all in five secs…
    Hon I would listen to people suggesting you take it slowly coz a natural Aries could easily in your impetuousness lol fuck it all up… Breath!! this is romance!!!
    He wants to get to know you because he likes you. This is exciting lol so calm the fuck down so all us romantics can live vicariously through you!!!
    I would give everything to have the love if another Virgo! Enjoy!

  12. Well timed for me.. Met a Virgo recently and he is so confusing after my 2 long term libran relationships – I mean Libran men can’t communicate once you get into a relationship with them, but they leave you with no doubts when the chase is on in the beginning. The Virgo is so slow and unreadable, I keep thinking he is not that into me and bam he sends me another message and confuses me again. In person he is attentive and sexy as hell, and seems keen but seriously wtf Virgo boy.

    1. Capricorns are like this as well. I just don’t have the patience to deal with it. Come to think of it the only “Earth” guys I can deal with are Taurus … Kind of.

      I’d take a fire or air sign any day πŸ™‚

      1. Yeah I agree, not sure I have the patience either, but I gotta break out of the Libra pattern I have been on (i’m a Libra too, and it does not work)…so I am being patient…for now. I want to just say can we just either get on with this or move on..but maybe I need to learn patience instead of jumping right in there because that hasn’t been going so well either. In the meantime I am going (silently) crazy.

  13. I love this love story.

    But what is up with this every 2nd Sunday contact hoo haa?

    Regardless of sign, that is strange.

    As a fellow Aries this would annoy the crap out of me and send me into Love zombie land.

    Married or partnered up? Um, seriously hun maybe he is!! But then again you met through mutual friends you would of got some sort of scope into this – can you clarify for us?

    I’d definitely broaden my horizons and date/hook up with peeps in your post code. This scenario is classic for zombie tendencies.

    1. Well Sweetie, you got outta that one alive.
      Your intuition overrode your um er libido?
      Thou shalt remain unsullied till the Right Man (for you that is) comes a trippin’ by.
      If i were there i would be looking for a Red Cloud or a White Cloud from the Reserve. UNless Lynn Andrews took the choice Chief πŸ™‚

    2. Hmmm that nodal thing. Mean in 5th Taurus
      & of course south in Scorp.Not understanding
      or resonating with anything googled read.
      On chart north node is on top of Chiron right now.
      Should i read that as an omen? An explanation, it IS 11th house Chiron)
      (think i just answered my own question).

  14. I’m in a similar pickle…Met a guy online, finally met in person over week or so ago & it was AMAZING! Had the best date ever & I KNOW it was mutual…we are both toro (i’m gem rising, aqua moon & he’s pisces rising (TBC) with sagg moon) . His Mars in Aries his conjunct my Venus in Aries. His Venus is in Gem & my mars is in aqua. He has Uranus & Pluto in Virgo so reminding me of the VIrgo guy above in the contact stakes…I’m so blown away at how much I like this guy, for the 1st time in 7 years I’ve actually met someone who has it together & this has brought so much crap out of me that I’ve immediately dealt with (courtesy of an AMAZING kiniesiologist I saw on the weekend – have been looking at her site for over 6 months umming & ahhing & last friday I was all BAM! I’m caling) Anyway…Mr Toro is extremely sllllooooooow with the contact. I’m struggling as I want to see/talk with him & he’s taking his sweet assss time…I don’t want to chase this guy, I want to do things differently but … after reading the posts above I’m thinking perhaps I should… Mr Toro has told me up front that he’s crap at relationships, def not in a r’ship, sketchy, loves his life, never been in love. Whether or not he’s the man for me, who knows but dammit I just want to get this ball rolling to see where it goes…i’m chomping at the bit to get to know him and the waiting waiting waiting is annoying me (Mercury in Aries)

    *sigh* This patience thang is exhausting….

    1. Impatient Toro, you sound like you’ve been very patient. Lol, but sometimes… ugh Toro guys can be so slow with the communication part.. aaaaaah

      Question if I may ask…

      Which house is his sun and moon?
      and which houses are yours?

      1. Hi ABFAB, thanks for your response.

        He has sun (with Merc & Jupe) in 3rd house, moon in 10th.

        I have sun (holding hands with Saturn) in 12th, moon 8th.

  15. On the married or not/in a relationship or not question a number of peeps are concerned about: Here’s the thing, she really has no way of knowing at this point.

    Frequency of communication isn’t really a good indicator though it seems the most logical one. I’ve been Sewered (he was a HIGHLY communicative, almost always available emotionally and otherwise at all times type o’ bastard) as well as have been courted by other married men with literally several jobs, children, hobbies who wanted to take me on dates/concerts/holidays. Some guys just really do pack a very full day. (rolling eyes)

    On the other hand, I’ve also been with the Double Libran who does NOT, regardless of distance, communicate all that much unless absolutely necessary. He also can’t multi-task to save his life. Or over-converse.

    It used to freak me out, the DL that is but after a time, I got that he really just wasn’t into unnecessary calling/texting or sigh, even talking. All his messages were either just your standard checking up on you or they were purposeful, where is, when is, what time etc.

    I think all this, not just the married part, really just needs to percolate until it comes into real time. It’s not exactly a bad thing for both of them to be wary until they explore it further no?

    1. The super ott communicative, all over me like a rash, promising the world Cap/Sag I dated last year had about 18 other women he was being super communicative with in every which way. The Virgo was more mysterious with his communications, turned out he was just not that confidant. Who knows at this juncture, I have to say it sounds a bit weird, even if he’s not married or otherwise partnered why all the rigidity? Odd.

      1. The rigidity is the bigger issue, yeah? Chemistry is one thing but dealin with the rigidity – is Aries ready for that? The only Aries I’ve gotten along with is my
        Daughter. And even then, it takes a lot of self-understanding. She poo-poo’s my Virgo concerns all the time saying “Aries don’t care about that!”. Funny and not romantic.

  16. Dearest Aries Amazon,
    You gotta be in it to win it !
    I’m with the “‘Meet me under the clock, at 8pm on April *insert date* (Where ist hat amazing Astro clock ? – Belgium is it ? (what ever Mystics best date in April for astro passion) I’ll be wearing… (nothing underneath ?)
    As an Aries i hate fart arsing about, You want me ? I’m coming to get you…Look out…
    That way, if it is too forward and you dont hear back from him, you can let him go…Maybe so as not to put him on the spot immediately, you could say, rsvp by (30 days before hand? – maybe get travel insurance so if he doesnt rsvp you can go somewhere else – New Zealand Queenstown for adrenelan rushes to clear thy heart ?) – Soz about all the brackets – it’s busy being Aries Sun, Pisces Rising, Stellium Gem..xx
    Best of Luck Babe!

    1. I wrote him last Tuesday, he read it, haven’t heard anything from him since. Usually I’d be my total Ramzilla self and say, “well fuq this guy, *delete from life forever*” and sleep really, really well the night after (only moderately-well the night of, of course). But this Mercury moving into Pisces has got me hella patient. I haven’t been moving my whole life around for this guy at ALL, and I’ll still grind up with a stranger on the dance floor, but really I’ve just been… watching what he does, you know? Like I did when he was *so sincere* etc when we met.

      Whatever he does, he does. Either way, in two weeks I’m going to be so busy: my move, my new job, my new life. If he chooses me, then great. If not, I’ll be so busy I may honestly not even notice + have more in super-savings.

      Though I’d rather we meet in Cairo rather than Seoul. Personally. (Totes on my bucket list.) Maybe he’s waiting for me to get settled to see if I keep the job, or waiting for himself to get settled so he can say he’s working towards something.

      Side note: We’re 23 (me) & 25 (him). He had no weird tan lines on his fingers, and there was a table-wide discussion on raising kids and how none of us have any but our ideas on the subject regardless.

      He IS friends with a lot of pretty girls, but the irony of that is he’s one of those effeminate straight guys who most women don’t believe. He made a point of mentioning this, fidgeting with nervous energy, and looking at his crossed legs and clasped hands resting atop his knee in annoyed helplessness. It made me laugh, which made him relax.

      Yep, def need to reassure him I’m hired and settled. I’ll wait until I’m actually there, though. Mhm.

      1. Hello Gorgeous Aries Amazon,
        You have an amazing outlook and approach, much excitement with all the new changes ahead. a sincere Virgo would be the cherry on the top !
        I hope he gets in touch on Sunday again. I hope he gets through his whole week thinking about you, and what he’ll write on Sunday.
        I can’t believe it now, (the patience i somehow had, maybe cause we’re so busy happily entertaining ourselves in between hearing from heart interests..) but at the beginning of the relationship with my Piscean husband – Virgo Moon, we would catch up and meet on a Sunday afternoon at 3pm … we both worked all week, and i remember having a crack at him (all though at the time i wasn’t irritated by this at all, in fact it was something exciting to look forward to) years later ! (Lilith in Scorpio maybe?) about how little time it was to spend together in the beginning..he said ”I married you didn’t I?” and well, he had me there !
        I hope it all goes most excellently for you.
        So many new changes ahead, if this isn’t the one, it’s a sample of the one ahead, (ie the sincerity and how lovely it was to kiss kiss kiss the night away!) one doesn;t match up to that’s be Adios Amigo ! Blessings x

      2. I you go for it – accept him as he is, please. He’ll never be a fire or water sign. Good luck with your move and may the best man win your time!

      3. Well. Hang on a tic. Having read all that, honestly my vibe is this. If I were in his shoes, in one country and you being in another and about to move to YET another place, would I really want to be investing a lot of time emailing constantly when I’m not even sure where you’ll really end up landing? Or for that matter, how many other cute hot strangers have tried to snog you?

        My point is, I think your practical circumstances are SO FLUID at this point that were I Mr. Virgo (I’m a Virgo Rising), I would be relishing your messages as a well-deserved treat, taking my time (yes I know) answering you, and just letting it play out in languor because I wouldn’t want to get all hot and bothered over a girl/boy I’m not sure the Fates will allow to me to see again.

        If that makes sense.

        You know LOTS can happen in these types of scenarios…and the other thing is, having just moved/traveled, the next question is how would you foresee carrying on a relationship that is at this point more emo-intellectual? Will life stop because you met each other? Obviously you already answered that question via being open to potential grinding of strangers.

        But Mr. Virgo may just have a different comfort zone, and yes, who knows maybe there are other temptations around him – as there may be for you.

        The bottomline is, any potential union is not immediately imminent. And even if you were emailing everyday, where does that leave both of you? Using skype uhm.. creatively?

        Hence time in this case, is both your enemy and your friend. Given your ages, and the opportunities/lives you’re each pursuing, maybe it has to happen this way for now?

        I think you’re doing the right thing by just going on about your business, securing your daily life and letting it take off from there. He’s probably being conservative about not feeling like he’s falling for you when he believes it to best to be open about that in person. Just my ten cents.

  17. “I know Virgos who don’t wear scent because they don’t like to impose” LOL! I LOVE this. I was going to poll my colleagues about their scent preferences/conditions as I’d like to bring some aromatherapy into work but would hate to impose. God forbid someone has allergies, you know?

    It amazes me how Virgo’s desire to not impose can come off as indifferent, selfish, withholding, or judgmental, but I see that it often does. I don’t know a Virgo alive who hasn’t taken shit for being such a Virgo. And the response in Virgo world is to get even more controlling about shit – but things you can control.

    Neither of you can control what happens next. You can only communicate. He probably doesn’t want to freak you out by over communicating. Or, he’s married and trying to train you into schedule.

    Romance is a risk. If you have to spend time together to know. Clearly, he’s interested or else he would not schedule or communicate.

    1. Preach! Cold, snobbish, critical the list goes on. The Virgo consideration for others is lovely, though often misunderstood and underappreciated. Off my cross now….

      1. “It amazes me how Virgo’s desire to not impose can come off as indifferent, selfish, withholding, or judgmental” v insightful 12V πŸ™‚

    1. OK I have a bit more to say on this, and I freely admit I may be coming from the position of my own hurts/biases, so take what resonates and ignore anything else.
      Of course he likes you, because you’re probably gorgeous, clearly smart and obviously compassionate. Every straight man loves to kiss a gorgeous, smart and compassionate woman, and they don’t want to stop.
      But I don’t think you’re being courted, hon, I think you’re being compartmentalised, and tested. My advice? Add a bit of quantity to the mix. Get out there, meet some others, have some fun, live your life, kiss some others who don’t want to stop… be courted by a man in your own town. It might take the heat you are feeling out of this sitch.
      If he would get freaked out by your messing with the schedule and showing up in his city, it’s probably not that he’s a Virgo. It’s that he doesn’t want an unscheduled meeting w you and the wife/kids. Sorry again. Blessings. I am a Piscean uber-romantic but I have a hard-arse Cap moon that I have taken to sending into battle first, before I commit the Pisces troops to the war. xx

      1. I’m not gorgeous; I’m cute/pretty. I’m an elementary school teacher (ESOL) who comes off as having their shit together more or less, though when I met him I was wearing my favorite folk-art hoodie, jeans, and boots with big chunky earrings. Also, I’m curvy, but apparently I carry it well enough. I also, as a fledgling Ram, have absolutely no idea what I’m doing most of the time and word vomit on almost all occasions (Gem Mars/Asc/Jup not helping this, but the Jup+all my Ram = I get away with it with a flick of my hair, a smile, and a moving the convo along with gusto.)

        In his defense, he first begged me to meet him in his country. His city, no, but mostly because that’s a 6-hour train ride south and as a layover I’d have a day, tops.

      2. You sound lovely to me πŸ™‚
        Ah well that’s brilliant – you have already established the lack of wedding ring – yes I am a bit gun shy on this one so forgive my bluntness! πŸ™‚ – *Cap moon moves over and hand Pisces sun the microphone* – it could be a wonderful experience to enjoy! Go for it – and report back xx

      3. @Chrys “I am a Piscean uber-romantic but I have a hard-arse Cap moon that I have taken to sending into battle first, before I commit the Pisces troops to the war.” – classic Chrys insight hun, can I try it out? – love ya work x

    2. Double Happiness

      Sorry, but I agree. Married! Or at least in another relationship of some description……I am a multiple Virgo and can smell a rat….

  18. He LIKES you. Hang in there, make a date, write back about what you’re thinking and what you’re reading. Watch ‘Before Sunrise’ for research purposes. πŸ™‚

  19. Lux Interior is My Co-Pilot

    As a Virgo here’s my 2-cents worth:

    He’s probably terrified of losing you (excellent) but also doesn’t want to come across too keen. I’d go with Mystic’s advice–wait for the appropriate time then make a date. If he comes to the party–you’re on to a winner. If not, at least you put it to the test.

  20. A skill like asking them when their birthday is?

    I have several planets in Virgo, including Sun and Mercury.

    I agree with much that’s been said above. Virgos love communication, so I would/wouldn’t make too much of it. But they wouldn’t communicate if they were disinterested.

    Also, personally, I can’t stand long-distance relationships. it’s not a relationship if you’re in another city/state, etc. You are just a friend I text / email etc regularly. End of story. So I agree with whoever said that.

    Speaking as a Virgo–and being a friend to several–Virgos can seem remarkably, predictably consistent and reliable until they flip out and do something totally unexpected. So look out for that mercurial factor.

    1. Agree about the mercurial factor. Virgos are mutable, which makes multi-planet Virgo man multi mutable. I don’t think the unexpected – like falling for someone quickly and making commitments on the spot – is unusual Virgo behavior. Nor is regular communication.

    1. lol, also! been wondering this for some time actually, not just in relation to this case….would appreciate tips πŸ˜‰

    2. I with you two also.. I didn’t think men would give out that detail. Especially the time and where they were born for awhile.

      1. Slip it in when you grill them, 20-questions-style, on meaningless but still kind of important/relevant details.

        “Well, since you only have five minutes left, we’ll only talk about happy things.”
        “Good, I like this. :)”
        “What did you want to be when you grew up, when you were 12? At 15? When/why did it change?”
        Then he told his buddies he’d catch up with them later, and away we were.
        “When is your birthday?”
        “How old are you, then?”
        AND YOU LOOK UP THE DEETS AT HOME. For the love of God[dess], don’t you dare start looking that shit up then and there. Way to look the creeper. Just ride out the chemistry and figure it out when you can/care to. <3

      2. …This kind of mostly works if their eyes are lit up from enjoying your company, romantic intents or no.

    3. My segue into birth deets is attributing my ‘youthful looks’ to being Gem Rising…which leads into an explanation of how that is a trait etc I advise how if you know what time you were born & the city you can find out your info…they verbalise the info & voila! Getting birth time can be a bit difficult …I was actually really touched that on our date Mr Toro told me he had asked his mum for his birth time, as he knew I was into astro & gave me the info so I could go do whatever it is I needed to πŸ™‚

  21. As a Virgo who once fell in love via passionate email with a Virgo, I think:
    – yes it’s a schedule, perhaps, for your multi-Virgo, but it’s also a way for him to subtly and in a pure way establish a connection with you. Nothing, NOTHING is sexier than evocative deepening communiques that basically are a prelude to serious passion stuff. Patience, Aries (my bestie is an Aries. I reckon that clocked schedule letter thing would do her head in, so kudos to you)
    – also its a way for him to hold off until he feels he can trust you. Slow, simmering, genuine.
    – you’ve spoken his language and tried to alter the schedule, but have you stated boldly, Aries-style, that you’d like more of him? That will probably floor him in a good way. Make the statement like a volcano – build up to it slowly then BAM
    – ….which makes me think, if you can go with it until next you meet, the sex will be mind-blowingly sensational. Believe me. That alone will probably be worth this whole schedule-thing.

    (ps Virgos DO do crazy intense love shit like meeting someone on last day in town and doing love r’ships in new and innovative ways. core objective must be that whatever the deal is must be pure and total integrity. You could be a poly with a foot fetish as long as it was a pure intention.

    1. “ps Virgos DO do crazy intense love shit like meeting someone on last day in town and doing love r’ships in new and innovative ways” –this was my LIFE for years, Lol!

      And agree, Aries needs to speak what they want! and Virgo will either comply or flee.

      1. My thoughts exacto – like he has the kids every second weekend maybe and you’re his escape/fantasy girl when he’s alone.. This could be totes off the radar of course but the message is be cautious, it’s all a bit weird. And it he does have kids, it doesn’t mean there’s no potential, so keep an open mind and heart but protect yourself and get on with your own life at the same time. Good luck xxo

      2. moi – my computer is misbehaving continuously – need to call my computer guy πŸ˜‰ I love Nick!

    1. Electric Eel Libran

      I’m suspicious too to be honest. πŸ™ Not enough info.

      And I speak from experience. I had met a Virgo man and back in those days having completely totally matching music collections was a reason to date. Stupid and funny now… but i digress. Anyways, he kept up scheduled times to email me, right as clockwork…. good rapport. We lived about 90 miles from each other so it’s not like we could see one another on a regular basis.
      About 3 months into the “relationship” …i shudder to use that word now….I moved to his city because of change of career. How serendipitous right! You’d think he’d be happy! After all, i got no sign that anything was wrong…regular, happy, 2-3X a week communication right? Things got weird after I moved to his town. He didn’t hide me from his friends. I made many friends among *his* friends. They liked me more than his previous girlfriends, even remarking that out loud.
      Only to find within 3 months of me moving to his home town he dumped my ass at a coffee shop. Why?
      I was the “inbetween girl”…while he waited for his ex-gf to get her shit together. When she saw he was dating me, she (an Aries) viciously re-inserted herself back in his life, hence my formal booting. He was doing nothing “illegal” by dating me. He wasn’t “cheating” on me technically, but now I know the signs of what guys do when they are “waiting” for someone else. Me and Virgo remained friends, after all this time. He is still a great guy to talk to and share music with, but WTF was i thinking bedding that one?! We were so incompatible in bed and how we ran our houses.
      Anyways Aries Insert girl and his relationshit EXPLODED literally 6 months after they got back together never to get back again. (She set fire to part of his house.) She was quite a drama fest, but that’s the type of girl he likes, and I’m not that and can never be that.

      1. I’m sorry to hear that. And I know the feeling. How odd that I was almost kind of in the same thing, only a relationship never even took place. Only flirting. And his was a Saggo girl with a lot of Aries.

        I agree though: Virgo men sure do love their “in-betweeners.” It’s a shame I have such a thing for them though

      2. Electric Eel Libran

        oh i def. don’t regret getting with him. I def. got something out of the relationship, so it’s not like he’s some evil person. He provided me companionship, shared music tastes, and an excuse for the Aqua-Cancer-ex to not chase me anymore. So yeah, it was a decent trade.

        But that’s the thing with those Virg-men. You don’t know if you are applying for the permanent position or a temp job. They won’t tell you either! You just have to find out!

        I have a Venus in Virgo. I do find them irresistable myself.

      3. Virgo male here..

        I’ve never really done the ‘in-betweener’ kind of thing.. I’m very much so all or nothing, it’s usually the other half with a different mindset.

      4. Electric Eel Libran

        Well I think that guy knew what he wanted (the Aries chick), but he still wanted to be “polite”. He had a lot of Libra in his chart…trying to hard to please too many people.

        My previous ex-fiancee who was also a Virgo with a ton of Leo was all or nothing as well. He was a very brooding and stubborn introvert.
        Of course he wasn’t as physically attractive so there wasn’t a constant gaggle of ladies who offered companionship at every turn like there was with the other Virgo.

      5. I have never had any dealings with Virgos, however, my gorgeous Gemini best friend seems to attract them. All of them have either had partners or ended up cheating on her.

        The last guy (who for ages she considered her ‘Dream Guy’), she met through internet dating and as he was in the Navy, they communicated a lot via email. When he returned home, she met his family and friends and they went out on many ‘perfect’ dates.

        It was only thanks to a meaningless comment she made on a social networking site that she discovered the truth. Not only was he lying about being in the Navy, he was also in a long term relationship and had a child.

        From your letter, I get the sense that you’re a smart and beautiful Ramzilla, inside and out. I hate being cynical but I’m with Electric Eel Libran. If there is a way of gleaning more information on this guy before you start arranging layovers to see him, do so.

      6. sounds like sex drugs and rock ‘n roll. Aries and Virgo. My ex virgo, big time escapist. Amy Wnehouse was 9-14. The biggest addicts I’ve met are virgos!! My mom is one. aargggh. Gross.

  22. as an incurable romantic – I wish you the very best of luck – if he has venus in virgo, we can be very picky about when and where things ‘eventuate’.

  23. I think there are too many details. (Aries don’t really do details, I know.) I’ve had long-distance relationships with Virgos. Yes, they’ll communicate on some sort of basis. All Virgos, friends included, do that. But they can also be amazing at hiding shit. Be careful that you’re not becoming his girl on the side, because that ended up being my case. Is this just a physical relationship? I agree with virgolicious: A relationship with a Virgo has to be one in which you live close to each other.

    1. I am in an online relationship with a Virgo man who is in the navy. Our timezone are 8 hours apart. We talk to each other everyday. He always Ask me if I have someone else if I took some time to reply to his texts. I am only in a relationship with him and are planning to meet very soon.I am just very curious if he is taking me seriously or is he just fooling around. How is a Virgo man really like in a long distance relationships?

    1. I love everything about this Link. That you though it, posted it, that the lyrics fit the situation so well, that it’s Joan Armatrading… you always relate song lyrics to life? I do. I once broke up with someone by sending them 3 You Tube song links…

      Having said that, for the sake of Aries Amazon I hope it ends up being irrelevant after all πŸ™‚

  24. Apologies for the pessimism but I agree totally with virgolicious. Unless he can see you in person on a regular basis (you need to live in the same town/city), I think this is just Virgo doing what he does best – being a time vampire whilst he waits for “the one.”

      1. Mars, Uranus and Pluto in Virgo = Agreed! I too can be a “time vampire” which totally fuqs with my Sag Sun…

    1. Agreed. I live with a Leo male who has 4 planets including Venus in Virgo. He is very much a time/chat/affection vampire. If it weren’t for ultimatums and me just taking the reigns he would never make a decision. Is perfectly fine with things going around in circles forever. Every so often he’ll act on his own but that is very much the exception. Left to him alone, things take forever! Could also be his Mars in Libra though.

      Thank goodness for all of my cardinal signs.

      1. mmmm being a Mars in Libra and Leo I luvs to circle my prey or just sit and look pretty while swishing my loely tail. But in my experience Virgs are not the initator type. On their timetable yes if not at least you’ll know clearly where you stand they are great no BS communicators.

      2. “… sit and look pretty while swishing my lovely tail” Hehe… πŸ˜€

        A Saggo guy with Mars in Libra and Leo MC cancelled a date at the last minute last week, because he was stressed and sweaty. Said he wanted to be at his best and “presentable” when he saw me.

    2. Redlipstick Virgo

      I vibe this guy is in a committed relationship with someone else – she is fantasy girl – Aries part over-rules Virgo taste for deceit – but even he can only manage deception once a fortnight! Don’t like it – you are not some guy’s ‘Internet mind Fuq or layover’.

      1. Omg, it was the first thing I thought of when reading about him pulling away…
        The red alert was instantly activated.

        Taking things tastefully slow is one thing… Not explaining sudden retreat is another

      2. Same here. Bad gut feeling when I read the part about the Sunday contact, that’s probably when his wife/partner has something on…

      3. shivers – you’re probably all right on this – I of course took the ‘give it time and space line’ – lz in recovery

    3. And what Aries can’t do is wait or be ignored. I totally agree — unless you’re in the same city or town, Virgo isn’t gonna waste money on gas or a plane tix for too long. An Aries would also need to throw on her brakes, think before she speaks, and act like Jackie O to get a Virgo to fall head over heels. I almost had mine. He got me the most beautiful ring ever, I gave it back. It was too hard. He blew hot and cold too much and can get nasty as hell with the nitpicky b.s. OMG. I still love him. I haven’t heard from him. I’m playing it cool (very hard) — if he really wants me, he come get me and pursue me. I’m done with pursuing men. BTW I’m an aries with lots of cardinal. and most of my asteroids in pisces.

  25. I am one with the Mystic Wisdom here. YES. You are ON the schedule. Not only does he like you, he has institutionalized you on it. MM’s suggestion of setting an X-time/date is essentially a primer on How to Speak Virgo.

    If you want to freak this man out, all you’d have to do is go off-schedule and/or question the schedule. Or yes, overwhelm him by taking over.

    I think you just need to get used to being courted via calendar, just give him positive feedback of interest and enjoy the pace. Obviously he is being careful to build what he can given the distance without you know, driving things into fictional intimacy or dropping the ball. It all sounds lovely to me, good for you both!

  26. The title of this post reminds my of a book I picked up in NYC about 10 years ago – How To Tell A Bastard By His Star [sic] Sign.

    Of course, none of the Sun signs come off well but it is a hilarious romp. Recommended for Love Zombies.

    Aries Amazon, as a Multi-Virgo I feel I should be able to offer some advice so here goes. My instinct is that he’s not going to ‘invest’ until you’re in the same room, or at least in the same city. Virgos are nothing if not pragmatic. Correspondence is not enough (btw I don’t buy the schedule as a positive – schedules are for chores, not for pleasure).

    Your move.

    1. Really? I tend to see the schedule as THE room in this case, at least until they get together in the same country. Which kudos to Mr. Virgo he was quite definite about vs the vague, “we should catch up some time”.

      I think circumstances couldn’t be helped that they were both in transit, and he’s doing what he can to follow through until more definite things happen. Of course, I’d totes agree with you about schedules being more for chores if say they didn’t have to use it to protect the budding potential of l’amour.

    2. totally agree with your comments re making his ‘schedule’ – long distant emails are ‘safe’ – and even they aren’t very frequent.

      Is he truly interested? sorry but don’t think so, you are a bi-weekly safe diversion.

      He’d probably bore the hell out of a multiple conjunct Aries so count yourself lucky he’s not more assertive.

      That should be your BIG CLUE.

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