Serenity Signalling

serenity signalling

The weird thing about Serenity Signalling is that the people who do it are usually so strung out. The higher the incidence of “live, laugh, love” posts, the more likely they are to be enraged at their friend forgetting the name of their cat. Or firing off “never mind, I knew you would not get it” snippy texts.

They may not be Buddhist, but they’ll have the statue because it’s fantastic for Serenity Signalling.

The most prolific Serenity Signallers are Chaos Addicts who moonlight as Energy Vampires when they’re low on resources. They mindfully nurture their resentments until they’re at Grudge Flashpoint and ready to be released in a blame-storming session. And, because they’re brooding in the lotus position or sulking in Savasana, it’s totally fine.

If you call them out for anything, they’ll say it’s just your non-alignment, heart chakra or low spiritual evolution. Your fault, in other words. Serenity Signallers will steal your time, money, content, or friends and then tell you that you need to chill. Or be more light-filled, like them. Their theft is not problematic – your attachment is the issue here.

They want you to let go and go with the flow, but it has to be their flow. You may even be featured in a Serenity Signalling post, not by name but as “dark energy” that the person is having to breathe through or send healing energy toward.

Thoughts?

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Michelle Bell
Michelle Bell
April 26, 2020 8:29 am

Sounds specific, LOL. It borders on gaslighting.

Mimi
Mimi
March 2, 2020 5:59 pm

Oh hell yeah!!!
These types that resent you working through your shadow stuff, by calling it,
Dwelling in the negative
Or rehashing…
I thank the new AGE every day for Debbie Ford!

Janette
MM Member
Janette
March 2, 2020 8:21 am

Spiritual bypassing on steroids. GAAAHHHHHH!!!

suzannemarjorie
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suzannemarjorie
March 2, 2020 8:03 am

Thanks for articulating something that was really confusing me in a certain relationship ha!

dbananza
MM Member
dbananza
January 13, 2020 8:59 am

it’s hysterical because it’s true! and if i ever see THAT ‘calligraphy font’ again…….. O-0 BOOM

Rugosarose
Rugosarose
August 9, 2019 1:12 am

So real, and of course they are self proclaimed and never externally named “empaths” who just ~need~ a lot of space and extra care especially after something like having to see a homeless person drains all their energy so they have to go shopping to restore the vibes.

Scorpleocap
MM Member
Scorpleocap
August 7, 2019 1:28 am

Lol, I so love this! YES. This LLL business has always grated upon me big time and I thought I was the only one secretly barfing over it. What sort of bizarre astrological placement can lead to this sort of vacuous toxic positivity anyway?? I’m guessing they’re lacking in Scorp sensibilities.

MerMamaDream
MM Member
MerMamaDream
August 3, 2019 2:58 pm

This is so spot-on. I laughed so much I nearly choked on my new Cosmic Coffee (yes its a thing I bought it while up in Port Douglas last week – can never resist a fun name) I get suss when I see someone’s posts all being light & sparkles. And nothing else. Good Vibes and positive affirmations are great but…….is there any actual human (vulnerable, snarky, up & down, pissed off) living there, because if you don’t share actual real gritty grotty musing, well I’m thinking you’re prob a wind-up automata masquerading. Perhaps its my Scorpio Moon but sometimes… Read more »

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
August 1, 2019 4:25 pm

I once shared a house with a guy who ran Buddhist meditation classes in a big house. The rent was cheap as he used the main part of the house as a large meditation hall. I didn’t mind. The space was nice. But this guy was annoying. Always going on about Buddhism. I told him constantly I was sick of hearing about it. He was like a born again Buddhist. He would not listen. But for 2 weeks we had the honour of housing a Buddhist Lama from Cambodia. He was the real deal. I remember meeting him, at the… Read more »

chronicgir1
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chronicgir1
August 1, 2019 3:26 am

Dialed in.

vikingwoman
MM Member
vikingwoman
July 31, 2019 10:33 pm

This might sound inflammatory but this post can be translated and applied to a lot of Christian folks too. They affix all apprioriate car and home decor crap that signals how special their relationship is to Jesus while simultaneously screaming at their trans teen that Jesus hates fags. When I see all the bible-ology and Xristofanatic I get my robot Aquarius on and flatline that juju.

Reikology
MM Member
Reikology
July 31, 2019 2:01 pm

Omg I’m so embarrassed I think I might be one of these at times, totally not intentionally! Oddly enough, this moon cycle has been illuminating it for me!! It’s true, sometimes the Qi vamp is actually you.. Work in progress.. Cancer/cap rising/Aquarius moon.

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 31, 2019 6:13 pm
Reply to  Reikology

Dont be embarrassed. At least you are honest and self aware. Oh I rode the New Age wave when I was traumatised, lost and searching. Some concepts helped me st the time. Some prolonged my delusions. I just wasn’t ready to face my stuff. I did develop spiritually in my own way which was good. I grew up working class and these concepts were laughed at and seemed so self indulgent. So they opened me up and helped me accept my Neptune ruled qualities. I did meet a lot of very interesting people. And I grew through these experiences. But… Read more »

Invicta
MM Member
Invicta
July 31, 2019 8:26 pm
Reply to  Reikology

100%
I once called out someone’s behaviour on twitter in a general way – like people who do that- vibe.
When the person I was mad at confronted me I snapped that “not every is about you you know!”
It was totally about them.

leotaurusscorp
MM Member
leotaurusscorp
July 31, 2019 10:38 am

made me larf so hard i nearly hit my head on the desk!

BRILLIANT, mystic.

have been teaching a free meditation class at my local community centre, just as an entry into a career that heads into serenity territory. a student today told me that she loves the class because, “there’s none of that fake buddha sh!t with you.” made me Very Happy to hear.

i know this type all too well…my bullsh!t-o-meter goes off the scale and i slink quietly away 😉

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
August 1, 2019 4:10 pm
Reply to  leotaurusscorp

None of that fake Buddha shit. This is Gold.

gemcap8
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gemcap8
August 14, 2019 8:07 am

GOLD

Laurel
MM Member
Laurel
July 31, 2019 8:45 am

So FUNNY. Some of the most toxic groups I manage (I’m an online community manager) are “new age”. They virtue signal, flounce (threaten to leave the group), and say the cruellest things ie “your karma is so bad you deserve to get cancer”. Not all of them but the nice, spiritual, helpful, evolved ones tend to quietly quit while the drama games are going on. These “i’m more evolved than you are” groups are very passive aggressive and tougher to deal with than most groups I manage including political ones. #justsayin.

ponycat
MM Member
ponycat
July 31, 2019 12:23 am

Currently assigned to the metaphysics section at work and I see at least a dozen of this type everyday and there’s at least one a week that outdoes the rest. Obviously, they are a*holes as customers.

emg
MM Member
emg
July 31, 2019 2:37 am
Reply to  ponycat

You have a works ‘metaphysics’ department ?

RitaTocta
RitaTocta
July 31, 2019 10:53 am
Reply to  emg

I’m guessing the workplace is a bookstore!

South
MM Member
South
August 1, 2019 2:19 pm
Reply to  RitaTocta

Or a library

ponycat
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ponycat
August 4, 2019 9:45 am
Reply to  RitaTocta

Ah yeah bingo!

Chrysalis
MM Member
Chrysalis
July 31, 2019 10:01 am
Reply to  ponycat

I wish my old school, dinosaur, bureaucrat workplace had a metaphysics department. I might unilaterally set one up in my office! But yes, I imagine the serenity signalling type might well frequent such an area

Sam
Sam
July 31, 2019 6:31 pm
Reply to  Chrysalis

chrysalis: I might argue that a Piscean in the workplace IS the metaphysics department 😉 xxx

Chrysalis
MM Member
Chrysalis
July 31, 2019 6:37 pm
Reply to  Sam

<3 xxx

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 30, 2019 7:59 pm

I love Seinfeld. It’s the only thing on TV that makes sense and makes me belly laugh.

Unicorn Sparkles
MM Member
Unicorn Sparkles
July 30, 2019 7:13 pm

“ why are hippies always so angry?”
A question I remember being asked way back in 1992…
Social media has made it so much worse

flowerchild
flowerchild
July 30, 2019 9:02 am

Dismissive positivity, toxic positivity (ONLY positive thinking allowed, to the superstitious level, like the superficial understanding of LOA), spiritual bypassing, all of it….ugh. The only friend I have up here in the new area I’m living in pulled all of this sh*t with me and it left me feeling so alienated at a time when I can really use some friends and support and community. The kicker is that she’s had a lot of serious hardships in her life, too, and still that didn’t foist her into reality about how to deal with difficult stuff in life and trauma. I… Read more »

QuiteLight
MM Member
QuiteLight
July 30, 2019 5:20 am

😀 Wow, my SIL. She is a spectacular Drama Queen & Chaos Addict, but seems to have finally slowed her descent into complete soap opera theatre. While lying to her family about sleeping with strippers, marrying her second husband (found out on Fbook), and being trapped in another country due to having a beautiful child with a local (1st husband), her feed was full of enlightening lists decorated with buddhas & dancing Shivas. In her defense, she may honestly believe this wisdom comes from Facebook, and reposting it will make it so. She is not the deepest puddle. The hard… Read more »

QuiteLight
MM Member
QuiteLight
July 31, 2019 4:56 am
Reply to  Mystic

I should probably clarify that “another country” is Pennsylvania, USA, (we live in Canada), and that she works in fracking. I don’t think she’s trying to save anyone.

Chrysalis
MM Member
Chrysalis
July 31, 2019 9:11 am
Reply to  QuiteLight

“She is not the deepest puddle”. LOLOL.

bird
MM Member
bird
July 31, 2019 4:49 pm
Reply to  Chrysalis

That gave me a good laugh too!

Scorpio_Rising
MM Member
Scorpio_Rising
July 29, 2019 11:49 pm

I avoid the pseudo enlightened at all costs. The holier-than-thou, self-righteousness is offputting. No amount of positive affirmations can cover up the seething with rage vibe.

Neptunia
Neptunia
July 29, 2019 10:26 pm

Live. Laugh. Vomit.

Mystic thank you for capturing these energy vampires so eloquently. xx

oceanmama
oceanmama
July 29, 2019 9:27 pm

You’ve met my mother?

RitaTocta
RitaTocta
July 31, 2019 10:55 am
Reply to  oceanmama

LOL

Invicta
MM Member
Invicta
July 29, 2019 8:33 pm

Horribly funny!

Invicta
MM Member
Invicta
July 29, 2019 8:38 pm
Reply to  Invicta

Been there, done that, got the statue!
Mrs Mia Culpa

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 29, 2019 4:59 pm

Thanks Mystic for having the courage to say what most people think.ñ And you have avoided collateral damage by being precise and clear. I always thought that their was some unspoken line about this topic that should not be crossed. But you did it well with amazing articulation. I suppose I felt guilt about this. I once did volunteer work for 6 months at a Buddhist Retreat. I was so sick of the drama queens, qi vamps and predators. I was especially sick of one particular blow hard carrying on about karma and dharma. One day I was working in… Read more »

Sam
Sam
July 29, 2019 9:17 pm

This is HILARIOUS and I approve.
Buddhist nun probably had a giggle later.

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 30, 2019 1:00 am
Reply to  Sam

I hope she did.

Gemyogi
MM Member
Gemyogi
July 29, 2019 3:44 pm

“Nama – fuqing – ste”

Wish Upon a Star
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Wish Upon a Star
July 29, 2019 3:56 pm
Reply to  Gemyogi

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha OMG.

SheRat
MM Member
SheRat
July 29, 2019 8:05 pm
Reply to  Gemyogi

I’ve actually said that after a particularly intense yoga class. I totally meant it like friendly mic drop, and to their credit, everyone in class got it and laughed (or at least, enough of them did).

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 30, 2019 1:00 am
Reply to  Gemyogi

My names not Nama and I won’t to fuqing go. Lol.

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 30, 2019 5:02 pm

I meant: my names not Nama and I don’t want to stay.

bird
MM Member
bird
July 29, 2019 3:04 pm

Listen to what people say, and watch what they do. If there’s repeated misalignment then there’s an integrity problem.

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 29, 2019 5:08 pm
Reply to  bird

So succinct and true.

bird
MM Member
bird
July 29, 2019 7:54 pm

Learnt the hard way!

TripleL
MM Member
TripleL
July 30, 2019 4:08 am
Reply to  bird

I just suffered through an “integrity round table” at work, replete with horseshit & faux tears. Barf.

TripleL
MM Member
TripleL
July 31, 2019 8:18 am
Reply to  Mystic

Dementia patient caregivers.

davidl
MM Member
davidl
July 31, 2019 11:22 am
Reply to  Mystic

Astrology ?

Sam
Sam
July 30, 2019 11:03 pm
Reply to  TripleL

Barftastic. Are you ok? Omg

TripleL
MM Member
TripleL
July 31, 2019 8:21 am
Reply to  Sam

Hahaha! It sucked royally, but I survived.

SheRat
MM Member
SheRat
July 31, 2019 1:09 am
Reply to  TripleL

WHAT? Is this actually a THING????? Oh….the wheels are already turning. Thank you, TripleL for this revelation….

TripleL
MM Member
TripleL
July 31, 2019 8:39 am
Reply to  SheRat

LOL. Yes, unfortunately where I work, it is most def a thing (with cheesy inspirational videos & exercises, ad nauseam) … mixed with lots of blame storming/cheer leading & of course the most important element – free grub.

bird
MM Member
bird
July 31, 2019 11:33 am
Reply to  TripleL

It sounds disgusting!

TripleL
MM Member
TripleL
August 1, 2019 11:02 am
Reply to  bird

IT IS. UGH.

Resourceress
MM Member
Resourceress
July 29, 2019 2:31 pm

Ah! There is this funny magazine type series called “the hippie watching guides” and they refer to these people as “Shanti’s” — the books are hilarious and make for a great hippie people watching scavenger hunt!

baristagem
MM Member
baristagem
July 29, 2019 1:25 pm

Hahahahaahh!

Geminian
MM Member
Geminian
July 29, 2019 11:48 am

Yes I know this. They love to punish and humiliate too and steal other people’s power as though they were born to it. Nasty pasties, often with no real intuitive, spiritual or psychic aptitude either. I had one who stole the whole content for a lovely ritual I do. No acknowledgement, nothing. Quoted it word for word at their wedding in their vows and went made a big song and dance about everyone they were grateful to, except for me because I hadn’t dropped everything after being given two week’s notice to attend said wedding. They have Neptune square Venus… Read more »

Ariel
MM Member
Ariel
July 29, 2019 9:55 am

Ahahaha oh god, this is my all-Scorpio planets in 12th house nightmare ex-flatmate. There were statues of gods & goddesses everywhere, little altars. They would shame you for not knowing about some infamous ashram in Scotland. Once, they interrupted an astrology reading I was giving in our living room (having told them I’d be doing so) so they could ‘have a cacao ceremony’ with their friend. We had to move to another room whilst they didn’t even do the ceremony – they ended up drinking tea & looking at photos together… when I’d point out how attacked I felt it… Read more »

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 29, 2019 4:47 pm
Reply to  Ariel

I can learn from your experiences. Especially the bit about them feeding you bullshit at first. Most people put on a false front, I just accept it. But now I won’t.

Gee I didn’t accept it when I was much younger. I was such a smart ass.

My phycologist is teaching me boundaries at the moment.

VirgoProtocol
VirgoProtocol
July 29, 2019 9:30 am

One hundred percent agreement.
Have had an epic 5 year experience with one.
Byeeeee.

Lux Interior Is My Co-Pilot
MM Member
Lux Interior Is My Co-Pilot
July 29, 2019 9:26 am

I’m dying.

Sim oneness
MM Member
Sim oneness
July 29, 2019 8:43 am

Fucking Brilliant Mystic

Lucia
MM Member
Lucia
July 29, 2019 8:21 am

So true! And such a crisp expose Mystic.

The Year of The Phoenix
The Year of The Phoenix
July 29, 2019 8:04 am

This is my recently departed work mate! Third day in it’s a flood of tears and flimsy story of gf troubles which sounded dire then when you thought about is not a big deal really….. I can understand feeling overwhelmed and needing to tell someone but she told everyone, methodically

So much passive aggression and long weekends spent seeking serenity at retreats and wot not, the post above is her to a T

can only thank you again for the salt trick Mystic, it seems to have a lingering effect of showing the chaos addicts and Qi Vamps the door!

firecow
MM Member
firecow
July 29, 2019 7:58 am

Yep, definitely have seen that dynamic play out. They are aspirational in terms of personal growth, but have no clue that it involves anything but the accessories. Their lack of integrity, maturity and self knowledge means we can’t be friends, and their attractiin to instagram is one of the reasons why i’m not on it.

VirgoProtocol
VirgoProtocol
July 29, 2019 9:32 am
Reply to  firecow

Boy ain’t this the truth.

kriblack
MM Member
kriblack
July 30, 2019 3:18 pm
Reply to  firecow

Full disclosure: I’m still mostly in it for the accessories. :’D

Alouetta
MM Member
Alouetta
July 29, 2019 7:34 am

Funny!
I don’t have these people in my life thankfully, because they talk too slow. But how much signalling is there these days? Instagram has a lot to answer for. On an aside I read that insta influencers were being used to push smoking and looking around there seems to a resurgence in young people taking it up. Urgggh! Wish people could just see through the bullshit.

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 29, 2019 4:03 pm
Reply to  Alouetta

Because they talk too slow: hilarious.

RitaTocta
RitaTocta
July 29, 2019 7:13 am

You are brilliant.

aqua hair
aqua hair
July 29, 2019 5:18 am

I call those people spiritual slags

Alouetta
MM Member
Alouetta
July 29, 2019 7:26 am
Reply to  aqua hair

Ha!

LA
MM Member
LA
July 29, 2019 4:09 am

You know I love this!

Houdini
MM Member
Houdini
July 29, 2019 4:03 am

“Serenity Signalers” What an insightful exposé!- I so love you, Mystic!

BLISS WITCH
MM Member
BLISS WITCH
July 29, 2019 3:45 am

Dude!!! I live in Oregon and this is so for real.

Alysun
MM Member
Alysun
July 29, 2019 2:58 am

As I’m reading this, I’m taking role of alllll the people in my life that could fit this mould. I look up with thoughtful introspection and notice not one but Three Buddha statues (I have that many?) plus a lovely iron statue of some Indian goddess, so and so. Am I that overly enlightened, so helpful person? Lol@ I am wondering if this energy can be transferred to an unsuspecting host. That I absorbed this from that one crazy aunt or friend. Or could it be that it’s just easier to use the fixed socially acceptable idsmissive response to “help”.… Read more »

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 29, 2019 4:16 pm
Reply to  Alysun

Personally I like the breathing thing. It helps me with anxiety. It slows everything down. It’s a good technique. Listening is always good. I also love walking barefoot on grass, so grounding. I suppose the thing is to find what works for you and not bore everyone with it. Like I just did. LOL. Personally I find spirituality similar to good love making. You can’t explain it to someone else because its your experience not theirs. Also it’s a private thing. And it loses it’s magic when you convert a right brain thing into words. I have Neptune in Scorpio… Read more »

pixelcandles
MM Member
pixelcandles
July 29, 2019 2:52 am

This feels reactive lol.
Yeah, I know that feel.
You will live, laugh, love your way to healthier friendships with sincere people.

Caterina senang
MM Member
Caterina senang
July 29, 2019 7:53 am
Reply to  pixelcandles

yes reactive and triggering more of the same misery it is judging

SheRat
MM Member
SheRat
July 29, 2019 9:21 pm

ahhh serenity signalling on the post about serenity signalling! How meta!

TripleL
MM Member
TripleL
July 30, 2019 3:57 am
Reply to  SheRat

Lmao! 😀

emg
MM Member
emg
July 29, 2019 2:28 am

This is hilarious. I can’t think I know anyone like this, simply because I probably unconsciously cross the street prior to even meeting their aura (I’m so evolved). However I used to have to mix with this type and I’m so very pleased that part of my life is done. I reckon the one who knows is the one you bump into and drops you one unassuming line, which impacts or is the quiet one who fascinated you from a distance and eventually you must meet. Mysterious souls who claim nothing either about themselves or from you.

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 29, 2019 5:58 pm
Reply to  emg

Nicely said.

kriblack
MM Member
kriblack
July 29, 2019 2:23 am

Lol. I work in an organic grocery store that shares space with a vegan smoothies and snacks bar. The public washroom we share has a chalkboard wall opposite the toilet for people to leave ‘positive thoughts only please’. So as you’re doing your business you are forced to stare at a wall of Serenity Signalling quotes blaring down at you. Some days I actually miss the crude messages and scrawled penis drawings in the bathrooms of my bar-fly days. Amusingly though, when the astro is titchy, the chalkboard wall will often devolve into a Pass-Ag comment war between the meat… Read more »

Alysun
MM Member
Alysun
July 29, 2019 2:35 am
Reply to  kriblack

Lol! Funny observation!

emg
MM Member
emg
July 29, 2019 3:09 am
Reply to  kriblack

Please please pin up a large picture of an aubergine ! Vegan and phallic win win

Redsonya
Redsonya
July 29, 2019 1:56 am

Oh my yes. I know about ten people who had never heard of astrology (other than occasionally reading their sun signs in the newspaper) ten years ago that are now making their living holding moon ceremonies and “healing” others. A 30 day online reiki course and they are off and running. It’s an obnoxious fad.

Wish Upon a Star
MM Member
Wish Upon a Star
July 29, 2019 6:11 pm
Reply to  Redsonya

A past friend timed the conception of her 2 daughters so she would have 2 Katakas. To have 2 Geminis would be a travesty. Her dad and I are Geminis. Yes she got 2 Katakas. But the first one who I had the pleasure of baby sitting has a Sag Moon. Cap rising. She is fiery, impatient and forceful. She knows what she wants. Her mother tells me she has Aspergers. I don’t swallow that at all. She is thoughtful and clever. I have seen the little darling frustrated and angry and stress manifesting in her body. It makes me… Read more »

Redsonya
MM Member
Redsonya
July 31, 2019 5:33 am

My due date ran late with my daughter and I totally admit to panicking that I might have a scorpio (like me). I let it go and ended up with the perfect combo for me – libra sun, cancer moon, Taurus rising. We get along great. I don’t have it in me to plan conception to that level though, lol.

SourPatch
MM Member
SourPatch
July 29, 2019 1:52 am

Oh my god those people make my blood boil. I have a lot of Neptune too, but maybe my Aries Mars lacks the patience to deal with these gaslighters in the end.

@iris
@iris
July 29, 2019 1:24 am

I twitched reading this post. These people make me itch. Note: this feels like a v Neptune in Pisces problem with everyone with no emotional boundaries thinking they’re Empaths or whatever. Now that the epoch has settled, this weird funky-murky pond water emulsion has separated and it has been much easier to distinguish the ‘‘‘‘gurus’’’’’ and crystal peddlers from the legitimate. Though, I will say that I did just go through a bish of a Neptune transit. I feel so immune now, ha! Similarly, you guys notice how everything Uranus in Aries feels tired as hell? Proving yourself and flexing… Read more »

libralady
MM Member
libralady
July 29, 2019 1:14 am

I have just chopped a friendship like this out of my life

LightningButterfly
MM Member
LightningButterfly
July 29, 2019 2:32 am
Reply to  libralady

So did I! Someone I had known for years socially but she was like incapable of making real connections, then we moved to different cities and ended up talking online all the time. Then I made the mistake of getting into business with her and she was a total nitemare. All the while talking about meditation, full moon rituals, and tarot card readings to “guide her business.” I feel sorry for her actually…just lost and doing all the wrong things to fix it.

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