Ask Mystic – The Astro Stalker

Filed in Ask Mystic

Hi Mystic,

What a manifestation for Venus Retro. I have a stalker. A colleague no less, who breezed in from a faraway office, Malibu or somewhere.

After one lunchtime chat she starts following me around the building, constantly hinting that she “dates women” and is “single”. I also date women, but I told her I’m happily in a committed relationship with a man.

She came up to me and blurted out “SO! You’re into astrology!” (I guess she’s been asking others about my interests) and I was like err….yes? And a barrage of questions followed like “What your Moon sign? Where’s your Venus?” It was an astro interrogation. She’s probably got our synastry charts pinned all over her walls, serial killer style. All I remember is she’s a Cancerian with Mercury in Gemini and 100% bats.

I’ve been avoiding her but the crunch came when she had clearly followed me to a place she had no business being and I reported the behavior. Her supervisor has agreed to keep an eye on her and pull her up if she sneaks off to stalk me (instead of doing work!) and if that doesn’t work, I’m going full-on confrontation. Hopefully she will “get over me” by Venus out of shadow.

Thank you for all your astro advice, it’s been keeping me sane.

best regards,

 Lux Interior is My Co-Pilot

Hi Lux,

I completely empathise with how horrible it must feel for you to be thus crowded! I have Aquarius Rising and a heap of astro-stalkers.  A significant amount of them a mansplainers with significant esoteric knowledge, little sense of how to apply it to everyday practical magic and a sense of pompous ownership about the way in which it is discussed.

A chick following you around asking about Venus signs sounds pleasant by comparison. But okay, infuriating when you are trying to work and lol what if she invents a little spy-app that matches your movements to your Moon patterns? How hard would it be to microchip you in a subtle manner? Maybe she is more digital than the standard noticeboard with maps and pics all over it. Maybe she has holograms of the sky and various planets, galaxies etc that she manifests with a gesture, like Robert Downey Junior’s Iron Man? You mentioned Malibu but maybe she is an alien ensuring she has the right “you” to make contact?

Paranoia aside, I feel a bit sorry for her. She clearly feels she has met a kindred soul in a Muggle populated workplace. This is is actually sounding a little bit rom-com already. What does everyone else think?

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Scorpio_RisingVirgo EllieprowlncrabPiBecinboots Recent comment authors
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Virgo EllieMM Member
Virgo Ellie

It is so good to see that your supervisor is on the same page with you. I would be so mad. Does she know you date women? That is what would get me is she assumed something (although it was correct, right?) And she is drilling you to pay attention to her like you are seriously interested in her… crazy. It’s like a stalker guy who comes on strong with BS comments. That unknown contact from a guy via social media who says “you are so beautiful, I love your profile picture and I need to get to know you”.… Read more »

prowlncrabMM Member
prowlncrab

Ughhh I’ve dreaded this discussion topic. I can’t bear to read other people’s experiences aside from a cursory glance (sorry, no disrespect) ….it just makes me upset when people dick each other around. I can’t break up with my partner!!! I have tried and tried and tried. He keeps coming back like … like …. a dead body buried under my floorboards! The guy just can’t take no for an answer. The evidence shows me a big “L” for Loser (ok no judgement), but like so many freakin issues that over three years it has become obvious I’m supposed to… Read more »

BecinbootsMM Member
Becinboots

“You better ask my Momma how to make a monster!”

Sounds like a love starved, head fuck gone wild.
Keep reporting and vigilant. Wear a telephone headset / headphones around the office in safe spaces if you can, if El Creepo approaches start speaking into it. Instant repellent.

Best of Anti Creeper luck to you, and hopeful self love finding to her.

Boots.

MoonglowMM Member
Moonglow

Not sure if I’m stating the obvious here, but I also think its possible some kind of personality disorder is a factor for these people, so many to choose from and mix together. But, their problem, not yours. I had a single-white-female-from-hell, who in her attempts to maintain/drain me, gave me the misopportunity to see repeated conflicting behaviours of her, and I figured out (thanks to the insight of a counsellor/sociologist friend) she was a mix of borderline and histrionic personality disorders, and I think she had an adult version of oppositional defiance disorder ( = just short of a… Read more »

Scorpio_RisingMM Member
Scorpio_Rising

Copycat behavior is the first red flag
and they’re super tricky to get rid of. I wish you the best.
If they feel spurned they can become your worst enemy. I’m currently dealing with this and it hasn’t been easy.

MoonglowMM Member
Moonglow

I think you did the right thing reporting to your supervisor. Keep a diary. Trust your fuqing radar. Your hackles are up. Obviously a qi vampire at the very least. I am wondering why she has been shipped off to the other end of the world???? Who or what did she have to escape or be expedited from? I have learnt the hard way that trying to be nice and politely set boundaries with these types doesn’t work. Agree the female stalking female is a somewhat stubborn and intense vibe. Keep the door even slightly ajar and you’re inviting the… Read more »

SourPatch
SourPatch

In this current climate with people being killed by their stalkers, I have no sympathy for them (the stalkers). Then again, I have a an aversion to anyone who has no respect for personal boundaries, and I’m a cancer too…LOl. (But with a Cap Rising). I really do feel sorry for Lux because it takes away your peace of mind. I hope something is done about it.

As for Astro, I think it’s a mix of Neptune and Pluto issues. But with Venus recently retro in Scorpio, tis the season!!

motherofunicornsMM Member
motherofunicorns

i had a stalker when i was working in a bookshop. Years later, I ended up working with him on a writing gig. He told me he’d seen my resume in the pile and realised it was me so he pushed the boss to hire me. But this conversation happened months into the gig and around the time I’d had a bit of a crush… and then… he went way over the top and shit got crazy.

Very flippant of me to say i sort of miss inspiring this level of devotion in men.

musoMM Member
muso

I feel for anyone being stalked on any level. I am going through similar … and for the fourth time in ten years. I have a fairly public vocation which attracts this kind of fixation. I’ve noticed the way the stalkers don’t seem to care if you think badly or well of them.. as long as you are thinking of them. I’ve found it really hard to ignore the stalkers once they get under my skin. I get angry when I sense my boundaries are being deliberately violate .but am getting better at navigating it. I think a fair bit… Read more »

Lux Interior Is My Co-PilotMM Member
Lux Interior Is My Co-Pilot

Thanks for your support guys. It’s always heartening to hear that others have been through similar. Maybe venus retro has a way of bringing these behaviours to the fore.

Thankyou for your insights and suggestions–_ I am so putting some salt under/near my desk!

ChrysalisMM Member
Chrysalis

Despite being a Cap moon sceptic on this one, I swear it works. I once did it in desperation to ward off a psychic vampire boss and afterwards she hardly came into my office at all.

MissDeeMM Member
MissDee

I am in an open space. Cannot pull that witch trick but sometimes I love to. To keep bad news from coming via email.

ElectroMM Member
Electro

Good luck, Lux! You have Sag moon, right? You’ll def bounce back – ride the wave, learn some new life techniques, and keep your head up. xx

Aqua-cap-GeminiMM Member
Aqua-cap-Gemini

Lux… same-same but different. Women stalkers, who like Women, are more predatory than men (in my honest opinion). I’ve been looking for that film – Single White Female, as some kind of empathetic antidote to what I should do next. I have worked on a strategy of avoidance, but as we all know – what we avoid only follows us around. I feel it’s coming to a crescendo to level some stark & cold aquarian truths, which will hurt – and really I feel a bit affronted as to why I have been put into a position where this is… Read more »

emgMM Member
emg

Exactly !

HelMM Member
Hel

You write so clearly, i love it!

Virgo EllieMM Member
Virgo Ellie

OMGosh… I totally forgot about that movie, Single White Female..

LibrariusMM Member
Librarius

I was being stalked by someone on and off for several years when I was 15-18. It got worse over some periods (now that I’m into astrology I wonder if they were retrogrades of Venus, or maybe some vicious transits for the person…), and at the lowest point I was actually getting scared for my life; for the rest of the time, when it wasn’t being much of a problem, I SOMEHOW managed to shut it completely out and, weird as it sounds, it didn’t affect my life that much. Go teenage me! — I’m not so sure I could… Read more »

SMM Member
S

Dear Lux, I can totally relate to this situation and I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’ve been stalked and it took me years to get over it, he did 8 years prison and a protection order was in place. Actually I’m reliving it again and it’s exhausting. He returned last year for his father’s funeral and I was again at that same address. My instincts when it originally happened were correct, as I had dreams of flashbulbs going off. Exactly how celebrities experience paparazzi. This time I’d started dating someone and I was in the shower and heard the… Read more »

MissDeeMM Member
MissDee

I am not Kataka, but a Kataka Venus: I used occasionally happen to be in places where I knew I guy I like would be, but we are talking freshman in college times, not a fully grown woman. Kataka tend to get emotionally very attached to peeps they barely know but the project a lot onto. I think the best thing is to focus on how much this give you discomfort and anxiety. I think you speaking to the boss is already a good thing: sounds like you are taking actions to avoid being a victim (don’t mean to sound… Read more »

WizarDoraMM Member
WizarDora

Firstly, I am really pleased this was passed onto a supervisor. Boundaries and protocol are super important, when this kind of stuff presents at work. Stalkers are chi vamps right? And they have the potential to undermine your livelihood, so stand firm and don’t take this stuff with a pinch of salt. Speaking of salt…. can you housewych your work space discretely? Also, keep a diary if necessary. Sounds like you are on it. I inherited a stalker at work once. I am not sure what it is about the care division that creates such insane crazies but all I… Read more »

ElectroMM Member
Electro

Lux, this has got to be your longest post ever. You clearly have boundaries and this chic is crossing as many as she can. Her Mercury is being opposed, definitely energetically, by Jupiter and Mercury. Plus there’s this full moon upon us. She needs to be shut down – be the opposition. Boundaries need to be next level. She’s not getting the ‘leave me alone’ vibe so be directly blunt and mean even. I prefer the ‘leave me alone’ vibe myself but some people don’t get it and won’t stop.

JokermanMM Member
Jokerman

Def Lux’s longest.

dark star
dark star

A psychic told me once to be cruel to be kind. This scenario applies

birdMM Member
bird

“Lux, this has got to be your longest post ever.” I thought exactly the same thing! Nice to know we’re paying attention (in a non-astro stalking way…)

That’s pretty sticky, cloying energy you’re describing there. It might be time to be blunt with her and let her know it’s not on. Some people don’t do subtle – or, worse, prey on subtle.

davidlMM Member
davidl

My first thought was .. I could do with a couple of stalkers right now. My second thought was what were you wearing. Like it might be your fault ? According to the patriarchy handbook you may have just been asking for it ?

(Alert to all : I’m joking ok ! )

emgMM Member
emg

Hahahaha.

birdMM Member
bird

Bahahaha… Stirrer. It’s nice to have you back commenting, davidl. I’ve missed your input.

Unicorn SparklesMM Member
Unicorn Sparkles

Has she done this before. I’d bet this Isn’t a one off.

I was reading the reputable (hahaha) News site that is the dailymail and some girl in Scotland just discovered an Instagram stalker. Girl goes to same uni and for the last two years has been mimicking her posts. Her clothes. Her captions. Poses. They’ve never even met.

Scorpio_RisingMM Member
Scorpio_Rising

Creepy. I had a few of those two very unnerving. One went as far to dye, cut, style her hair like mine then start to haunt my favorite bars.
She started havoc for me!

Aqua-cap-GeminiMM Member
Aqua-cap-Gemini

Yes, I’ve got one that has died her hair to match mine.

Scorpio_RisingMM Member
Scorpio_Rising

One girl in college copied my haircut short pixie and bleached it. She was the same height so many people would confuse us from behind. I was freaked out so I dyed my hair back to black and she copied it the next day. I knew absolutely she copied me and it wasn’t by accident. We shared a class together and my teacher called her out on her behavior. My teacher also noted the stalking and had a word with her. She was asked later to leave college for other disturbing strange behavior. It angered me at first, then worried… Read more »

Scorpio_RisingMM Member
Scorpio_Rising

Single White Female!

ElectroMM Member
Electro

Gross! I had one in the form of an old friend that seemed low key jelly of me… and then she started dating my brother in law. It was full on ‘watch me charm your family and friends’ and pretend the be the next matriarch. Some people have absolutely no boundaries.

Unicorn SparklesMM Member
Unicorn Sparkles

its Just strange all round. People feel they need to prove something or be something/ someone they’re not. It must take a LOT of energy.

JokermanMM Member
Jokerman

It probably is no effort.

Scorpio_RisingMM Member
Scorpio_Rising

It might not take as much energy as we may think. It’s probably a lot easier to adapt someone else’s style then create your own.
To a certain degree it’s flattering then it can quickly slide into creepy if it goes way too far.
Admiring someone’s jacket is one thing copying the entire look and pretending to be that person is another!
I highly suggest Lux put up strong boundaries asap, and let those close to you about the unwanted attention so they can watch your back for you.

Unicorn SparklesMM Member
Unicorn Sparkles

I just think of most extreme I guess – a level of obsessing that could become all consuming. And delusion. You can’t reason with someone who can’t see themselves when they’re busy being someone else.
Definitely agree with setting boundaries and having support.

JokermanMM Member
Jokerman

“low key jelly of me”.
Hard to swim in?
Sticky?
What colour?

ElectroMM Member
Electro

Jelly is more fun to say than jealous.

JokermanMM Member
Jokerman

So it’s green. Thanks

Scorpio_RisingMM Member
Scorpio_Rising

Disturbing! I know the type, the wear many masks!

PiMM Member
Pi

i knew someone like this. the libran scorpio frenemy. ugh. she was obsessed with being top dog and kind of consumed people as BFFs before casting them aside. that included buying the same style of clothes and shoes, adopting all their friends, mannerisms, it goes on. I guess she used her good social intelligence to fuel her need to have power, which was driven by insecurity. i consulted a clairvoyant who actually gave me some good advice, plus some other helpful personal boundary-setting behaviour. Once I was wise to it it became a lot easier. her moon is conjunct my… Read more »

Scorpio_RisingMM Member
Scorpio_Rising

I wonder what fuels this behavior?

PiMM Member
Pi

There are probably all kind of formal psych explanations but the ones I’ve seen being really a bit psycho about pwning other people, whether openly or covertly, just seem to have a pretty unstable sense of personal value or identity or something in the wider world maybe. And rather than engage with normal coping mechanisms or self management or whatever, proceed to try and capture or control that person in certain ways. Maybe their target represents something to them that they think they aren’t, or can’t be. Or their sense of personal capacity is so poor that they have to… Read more »

Scorpio_RisingMM Member
Scorpio_Rising

Strange, I responded to you but the reply was deleted. Not sure why either?

Lux Interior Is My Co-PilotMM Member
Lux Interior Is My Co-Pilot

Ooh that IS creepy.

emgMM Member
emg

I’d be inclined to let her open up about what she really wants and what is on her mind… Listen and then close every door if any of it pertains to me being with her etc. So it allows her to see what she is asking for, as most of the time folk have no idea about their desires or motives even. I always deploy very direct and honest dialogue so that they are left with no doubt what they wanted and what they can and can’t get. If she persists then she needs far greater help and should be… Read more »

JokermanMM Member
Jokerman

Yes to upfront.

emgMM Member
emg

Always

skarabMM Member
skarab

Yep.

SilversMM Member
Silvers

Maybe she wants to befriend someone who shares some interests with her!

Pi
Pi

pestering someone about their astrology is a bad way to do that! imho.

yours reticently,
moon in capricorn

SilversMM Member
Silvers

Ha. Moon Caps are friendly to me. It’s funny from my viewpoint. Ive got a new colleague who befriended me hanging around my position where I’m working, unnecessarily, while shes on her break, she asked me about my planets, and shes attracted to women… but it doesnt bother me. People have different ways and manners. I prob wouldnt discuss sexual preferences with someone, because it could be interpreted as interest. I’ve been stalked to another city, so I know that horror. An enthusiastic workmate doesnt register as a danger with me. Are the people flapping multiple Air element? Im strongest… Read more »

PiMM Member
Pi

ha, I am probably most comfortable with very enthused fire types too.. but also caps, of course!.. I guess we all have our comfort levels.. my aqua sister has no problem with anyone, afaict. as a gem rising i do love to chat with whoever and blip around everywhere, and i die of boredom if i have to stick to some kind of po-faced politesse all the time.. but i thought more about your comment during the day and it made me think ýeah, maybe she simply does just want to make frens. but also I wondered how often my… Read more »

RubentMM Member
Rubent

AHAHAHAHAHAH Yas Pi, YASS. Fellow Moon in Cap here and I had a similar vamping experience with a woman who comes to the studio I work at. She also pulled the astrology trick out. And this happened THE DAY Venus went Retro. This woman I had overheard prior was into astrology, IS an astrologer, practicing apparently. When I heard that there was an immediate decision made in me. ‘That’s cool, but I have no interest in talking astro with her.’ It was quite acute. Cut to the day in question, we’re the only two in the lobby area and she… Read more »

PiMM Member
Pi

ahh god what a rollercoaster. ouch. i am relating strongly to your emotional response. ‘it’s no-one’s damn business aktuly incl urs’ is usually my little ticker-line running across the screen of my mind…

birdMM Member
bird

That was generous sharing Rubent, thank you. Yuck. What a disturbing lesson, gleaning such powerful insights. I relate to your story, and will try breathing iron door. I hope you feel better. xox

RubentMM Member
Rubent

Thank you:)

GirlSixMM Member
GirlSix

Lux it doesn’t sound cute to me. Its clearly not professional and borderline creeper. Can you shut her down with something like I don’t discuss my personal life or interests at work in a cold type of way that lets her know you are not interested. If she still is stalking or making inappropriate comments you can report her to HR. She already annoys me and I don’t know her. I had a weird overly aggressive girlfriend in my 20s who I dated but when we weren’t together she was full on stalking me. It’s not a rom com and… Read more »

LaurelMM Member
Laurel

Yeah. I’m with you. Not cute. I’d push back, and telling her boss is not enough. Write a letter to HR. She’s better as an open enemy not a half hidden stalker. ..

JokermanMM Member
Jokerman

Right, I’ve been accused of similar, not actual stalking. I was applying to get a job once where the bloke said I ‘knew’ so much about him that I got the union onto him. He didn’t give me the job because I ‘spied’ on him. I did no such thing. But I can’t help picking up things. I have Cancer Sun & Asc, Virgoan (Mars, Pluto, Vesta- the 3 most Scorp aligned bodies) & Venus in a 1st Decan Stellium & both of Pisces’ rulers, stationary direct, in 4H Scorpio. Both Uran and Nep light my Sun and Moon. My… Read more »

Unicorn SparklesMM Member
Unicorn Sparkles

I’ve been accused of stalking by people who don’t understand how little I care but then the accusation is like “challenge accepted” and I end up google searching the crap out of them.

JokermanMM Member
Jokerman

I’ve never googled anyone irl. I have actresses, even some actors, and singers which helps me identify energy / characteristics / etc for astro purposes.

Funny how people can get threatened over imagined stalking.

Unicorn SparklesMM Member
Unicorn Sparkles

There’s a strange perception of it by people who don’t know how scary it actually is and I guess a bit of ego involved too.