Because you asked, here are my Venus Retrograde Beauty Rules.
Read on for the cosmic take on everything from lasers and oil-pulling to fillers or Botox.
For Retrograde Think “Reassessment”
People who are reading this run the gamut from avid beauty-techies to coconut-oil for everything. Take what interests you and ignore the rest. Likewise, with gender-specific factors that don’t apply to you or any idiosyncratic opinion that you don’t concur with.
# Oil-Pulling – This is here as it falls, like facial exercises, in the “it can’t hurt” category. But during a Venus Retrograde, beauty enhancements (Venus = Beauty) can malfunction in weird ways. So either of these two would be D.I.Y. and you could combine them with some suitably Venusian thought process. This is an astro-passage that evokes savage nostalgia or flashbacks of intimacies and sexual experiences gone past. The 20 mins you spend oil-pulling or making weird faces at yourself in the mirror would be good for processing. F.Y.I. Whenever I can be stuffed doing oil-pulling, I seem to get cheekbones and extra-white teeth/eyes. I know, I know – it’s not scientific. But still. Facial exercises were all the rage pre injectables but they antidote Botox and move filler around, so you can’t do them if you have stuff in your face. They work if you do them devoutly.
Botox During Venus Retrograde?
# Botox A.K.A. facial neurotoxin – Yes, it’s highly diluted and carefully prepared, almost homeopathic, perhaps. And it has not become a billion-dollar business because the results aren’t there. Still, those results can be unpredictable. You have only to watch the Real Housewives Of Anywhere or google terms like “spocking” to see this. Retro Venus is the most likely time for a less than desirable outcome. I have had it done because my Moon in Libra loved the feeling of insta-serenity it gave but stopped when Uranus moved into Taurus. I suddenly freaked over the chemicals/facial meridians/Third Eye/facial fascia impact. Even if you love the stuff and your practitioner, work around the actual Venus Retro phase if possible.
# Fillers – So I know a Capricorn cosmetic surgeon who is scathing about over-use of fillers. He is not just talking his book. He refers to it as the pillow-face look. It’s not as much of a no-no during Venus Retro as – say – cosmetic surgery or neuro-toxin, but it’s probably best to avoid seeing someone new to your face in this phase. However, if something looks weird, the doctor/nurse can dissolve it. So it fulfills the basic Venus Retro rule of being reversible. If it is irreversible, do not do the procedure during Venus Retro.
Venus Retrograde Has A Self-Acceptance Component
# Cosmetic Surgery – It is elective and so avoiding Venus Retrograde should be simple. You don’t have to have it at any particular time. If you think there is an urgency about it, see a therapist first. Date-wise, you’re looking for a strong Mars-Saturn alignment (surgery) good Jupiter (robust constitutionally) and well-aspected Neptune (the anesthesia). But if it is cosmetic, don’t book it for a Venus Retro. And if you get the idea for it during a Venus Retro, don’t book it. Try something else like intense yoga, therapy, journaling, osteopathy, a health retreat, etc. Venus Retrograde also has a big self-like and acceptance component.
# Gynaecological Procedures – This is interesting. It’s not optimal for anything that falls under the category of cosmetic, see above. But this Retro Venus is a fantastic time for getting your female anatomy checked out as Scorpio rules this part of the body. And Venus Retro is revisionary. So if your approach to gynecological health has been one of benign neglect or haphazard Kegels, resolve to see an epic practitioner and take charge of the whole scene. Not in a dreary, ‘oh fuq, I had better check that nothing vile is growing in there‘ mood but in an avidly gleeful and self-honoring style. You could combine the gynecological examination with acupuncture, herbs, or Pranic healing for a full Retro-Venusian revamp experience. Men? Wait for Mars Retro and do something similar.
# Vaginal Steaming During Venus Retrograde? No.
Saturn In Capricorn Is Fantastic For Dentistry
# Cosmetic Dentistry – Decent cosmetic dentistry includes over-all mouth health (the oro-facial ecosystem) and Saturn rules it. So I do not include this as a Retro-Venus “don’t” – unless you’re getting your teeth whitened on impulse or at a dodgy mall place.
# Lasers-IPL-Ultrasound – No. Just no. My personal feeling is also that the machines do not get as much regulatory oversight as they ought to. They are a lucrative business model that mushroomed in the age of Kardashian, Tabloid Geishas, and Instagram. People previously doing facials and standard beauty treatments upgraded into hire-purchasing hefty pieces of tech, paying per pulse of light or ultrasound. The whole thing feels old-fashioned already, high-tech face zapping and all. Anyway, zero ‘remodeling’ of facial collagen, controlled burning or face peeling with Retro-Venus. Also, this applies to machines that “sculpt’ fat or blubber it off by vibrating, fat-freezing or whatever. There are no short-cut diets or fat-fuqer treatments when Venus is Retro.
Lasers Are Incongruent With Venus Retro
# Cosmetic Acupuncture – It is not something (I don’t think) that could harm or that would be difficult to change back, so I guess why not? I tried it, and it drastically revs up your circulation to the face so you glow. Then again, so does dipping your head in a bucket of cold water, and it is faster. Idea: Get a few needles whacked into appropriate points while you are getting a more comprehensive treatment.
# Tattoos – A tattoo is a permanent spell and an activation of the planetary energy on that day. So, like elective surgery, get a date professionally chosen for you or find a good time in the Moon Calendar! So Retro-Venus does not necessarily negate tattoos. It would be particularly cool for body art you considered remedial or to mark your emergence from a dark era, especially if it involved a relationship. However, impulse tattoos during Venus Retrograde? No. Even if you are dreaming of ravens, ankhs or other cool symbols day and night, get a t-shirt or a piece of jewelry instead.
# Permanent Make-Up. This speaks for itself. It is the classic Retro-Venusian screw-up, and it is much harder to hide an “over-deposit of pigment” on your face than a bad haircut. No. If your brows feel skimpy, you could conduct a Retro-Venusian investigation – zinc levels, hormones, thyroid and all. My theory is that it’s some kind of a conspiracy. First, the overly plucked thin brows of the 90s and then facial neurotoxin, which would presumably do something to the microcirculation around the eyebrows. Now big eyebrows are back and tattooed in brows are in.
Yes To Cosmetics And Make-Up As Therapy Or A Scent Re-think
# Cosmetics – YES. As in, if you get a Jaffa-orange lip gloss that attracts flies and makes you look deranged, it’s reasonably easy to deal with. There are nearly always teen girls in your life who will avidly add to their collection via any means possible. It is also, as outlined here, weirdly healing to think about and be exploratory with cosmetics in a Retro-Venus like this.
# Scent – YES. Go the whole Proust trip. Become a psychic detective of your scent history. Go to a store and walk around sniffing every scent you ever wore for a reasonable amount of time. Get scent trips and take them home to smell in private, jotting down your memories in purple ink. It will be a new kind of therapy. Or mix up a new fragrance for yourself, using only your most astrologically aligned magic oils.
# Hair – YES but not impulse hair. Distrust sudden onset urges for hair extensions, buzz cuts, and drastic color changes. Or do it only if you combine it with a full-on lifestyle change. For example, if you were transitioning from being a nun to a dominatrix, you would want your hair to somehow signal the change. Or if you kept your hair a specific style because someone you are no longer sleeping with always ‘insisted’ you had it that way, screw it. Change it. Cackle as you leave the hairdresser. That night, go to sleep and fly around the astral plane like a harpie with cool hair, annoying those who did you wrong.
Purge Lingerie + Sex Toys From Days Gone By During Venus Retrograde
# Skincare – Retro-Venus is brilliant for a rethink of how you care for your complexion and logically assessing where you’re at with it. Target in on what you actually need/want to do for your skin and research the best solutions. This is when the revisionary angle of this astral passage really shines. Personally, I think those French drug store/chemist brands like Le Roche have all the high-tech ingredients at a fantastic price, the Nadine Artemis/Living Libations stuff is rad and I also love Aesop.
# Snazzy Lingerie – okay, so if you have little slinky sex-centric items lurking in your drawer that remind you of a time gone by that you do not want to repeat, you could always clutter purge it. Buying out of character new lingerie during Venus Retro is not a good idea.
# Weird S**t – the day Venus went into the shadow of her Retrograde, I heard about this chiropractor who has rooms by the beach where he charges thousands of $ to restore the “golden mean” of your face via a painful treatment that involves having a balloon pushed up into your sinuses and then popped. You come out broke and crying but beautiful, apparently. To anything that whacked out and surreal, it’s no.
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