Can I Blame The Eclipses For Strange Dating?

Sagittarius and the Eclipses. Online dating during Mars Retrograde and during the Eclipse Zone is a pain for all – but especially this Saggo.

Dear Mystic,

I’ve never written to you before. I am a long time subscriber and generally happy Saggo! I am hoping you can provide some insight. 

Saturn left. I felt it. I was excited. It’s been years of professional ups and downs. I purchased my own business through some very rocky negotiations. Then a huge flub in the sole proprietorship/incorporation realm cost mega bucks I didn’t have. I got it mansplained to the hilt by several people and it was frustrating. Over the last six months, however, my (also) Saggo mother and I have gotten our act together and it’s being ironed out with a sage guru of an accountant/business adviser. Thank Saturn! Phew, glad that’s kind of over.

For that whole time, I convinced myself that I was too busy for a relationship. Yet I still managed to entangle myself briefly yet sexually with a slippery Taurus womanizer and bang my blonde Saggo head against the wall of the abyss that is online dating.

Does Sagittarius And The Eclipses Have To = Strange Dating?

Several comically cringe-worthy dates later and a Gemini emerged. He excited me (we knew of each other during high school) yet never materialized. After six weeks I (PMS fueled) cut the communication. Patience is not a Saggo virtue. But the frustration over us being almost in the same social circles and 5 minutes away from each other yet never meeting was crushing. Enter horribly mismatched alcoholic Capricorn. I had my fun and blocked his number after he started some light stalking behavior.

The last eclipse I took your sage advice and wrote the letter. Sayonara to the three R’s; resentment, rumination, and regret. I burned that thing with pure joy and eager hope. I even treated myself to one of those hokey foot detox baths to help with the cleansing.

I’ve asked my dreams. I asked the universe. I’ve seen the birds and read the meanings, kept the dream diary, smudged, purged, feng shui-ed, and tried not to small-town zombie over seeing surnames, hearing of or indirectly seeing those ghost men or their ilk. These days, I don’t even get excited at the 11:11’s. I don’t even listen when the literal tens of people say ‘I don’t understand why you are single?’ Hard sigh, big shrug. 

Last night my dream was centered around a type of hospice center, my relatives who have passed were there, but healthy and almost assisting the goings on. I felt I knew some of the patients on a very small level however they weren’t the people I want to purge.

I am wondering if the current astro territory is cleaning out all these unknown ghosts and sludge for a reason? And if there is anything I can do to make this process more comfortable? Shall I just twiddle my thumbs, keep my head down and meditate until Jupiter graces my sign? My biological clock is ticking and I have never been more confused. 

Anxious but hopeful but lonely Saggo

Future Fakers & Ghost Bolters Are A Universal Online Dating Experience

Dear Anxious But Hopeful But Lonely Saggo,

Well, it’s witty and broadly pertinent enough to be an Ask Mystic, for sure. And my consults are booked out regardless!  So first of all, congrats on the successful Saturnine emergence. That’s seriously brilliant.

If it helps, i think the experience of finding Future Fakers & Ghost Bolters via online dating is just SO universal.  You should see some of the comments in the Dating The Zodiac series.  And yes, absolutely the Mars Retrograde during Eclipse Zone is a unique combo. It’s not prime dating territory – apart from (yes) this epic weekend.

What if you just turned PURE Sagittarius and took the whole “abyss” – as you put it – so far as a learning experience? You would literally write down what you’ve learned so far. Maybe with the Gemini, you weren’t being rejected – you were being protected? The smudging did work! And good call with dodging the “light-stalking” Capricorn.

July And August Is A Gigantic Tactics Reset

In love, art, and commerce, this whole July-August phase IS a gigantic tactic re-set. It’s a retreat where you check out your wounds and assess the armory. Regroup and devise fresh strategies. You would seem to be doing just that so well done!

You could also try the Virgo Dating Efficiency method.  Summary: She hit it hard, not wasting time online chatting and only giving energy to people who wanted to meet. Then she met heaps in a row, with breath-taking honesty.

With your hospice dream, I’m not quite getting it but it seems ancestor spirited to me and that maybe you have some post-business-stress angst happening. Why not love your self through this Mars Retro/Eclipse Zone and then reassess the terrain in September?  It’s not like next-leveling your health/serenity will do anything but good for future biological clock styled endeavors.

What does everyone else think?

Image: Nadia Lee Cohen

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GallicaMalkierCentaurusScorpintheSkyJokerman Recent comment authors
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MalkierMM Member
Malkier

please please please…….can somebody expand on the 11:11’s……. I keep getting hit with bizarre synchronicity / intense sparks of chemistry when in the vicinity of potential mates around these AM’s….

Gallica
Gallica

From my research it’s ‘the universe knocking itself out’ to show you synchronicity, and for me it’s not just 11’s it’s repeating numbers on a consistent basis for about a year now. 11 however is the main one, I find it comical but also slightly infuriating because I am that Saggo above of little patience and uber frustration.

PegasusMM Member
Pegasus

Dreams of ancestors and around the past. Do have 3 planets in 8th house and Neptune conjunct Moon mid-heaven 10th house. Last night’s dream was of 5 white kittens living behind my bed who suddenly became cats watching my pet dove with lust in their eyes. Was protecting the dove by holding it then moving it far away from them. Then went shopping with my deceased mother in David Jones. All seems very symbolic….not sure of what tho’. Did have a pure white cat and do have 8 wild and free doves that walk into my kitchen if late in… Read more »

CentaurusMM Member
Centaurus

Salutations fellow archer, Happy to share my (very brief – on the hop) take on it and you take what you will and discard what doesn’t work. Archers know the drill… 5, summarised, is the number of freedom. If you’re looking at numerology in the sort of noughts/crosses grid it sits in the centre so that suggests it can see all or head in any direction but also has a centre as such. You’ll need to use your personal interpretation of kittens and cats and how they translate in your world but there is a rapid maturation that’s evident and… Read more »

CentaurusMM Member
Centaurus

Saggo Sun on the SN here – so I’m here to offer a light on your dream courtesy of my Merc Rx who stands at the door of the 8th: “Last night my dream was centered around a type of hospice center, my relatives who have passed were there, but healthy and almost assisting the goings on. I felt I knew some of the patients on a very small level however they weren’t the people I want to purge.” A hospice is, of course, for the ill and sometimes terminally so… but in antiquity it was also lodging for travellers… Read more »

Gallica
Gallica

Thank you Centauras for this! Lately I have had a much more curious approach to the exploration of dreams. The people in the dream were my beloved maternal Grandmother who often visits so that’s comforting.

embarkons7MM Member
embarkons7

Just a couple stray thoughts on the dream — who were the relatives in it and what was your connection to them, when were you closest, in what stage of life did you lose them? And the patients who you knew in a small way — from your current town, from work, from a current life stage? Just elaborating on those might help shed some light on what parts of your life, relationships, &c the dream is illuminating — and about easing into another state ala hospice. I’ve come to believe and see in looking at my own dreams that… Read more »

Gallica
Gallica

The hospice relative was helping out the goings on and was my maternal Grandmother I was so so close to, I lost her in my late 20’s. This is all amazing insight, I am going to journal about this and see what comes up! Thank you!

ÁNLEIFRMM Member
ÁNLEIFR

Hello Saggo, I am a Sag myself but Saturn never leaves me as I am a Cap rising. Yes, Saturn left Sag a few months ago but for me he went straight into Cap LOL but you felt the relief and learnt something about business partners and finances along the way CONGRATS! I am not sure what your rising is but Jupiter the ruler of Sag is in Scorp, maybe that is the reason for the feeling lonley/clock-ticking because Scorp is a water sign = DEEP emotion. As Mystic said, ditch the alcoholic and the womanizer. you don’t need to… Read more »

ÁNLEIFRMM Member
ÁNLEIFR

I like the bear reading the newspaper with the headline “Missing Bear”, they are hiding out LOL

Pi
Pi

Also I really love those silver peeptoe boot heel buckle vibes.

Wish Upon a Star
Wish Upon a Star

Dear lonely, anxious Saggo,

After I read your post I got the message to pass on : Never forget how wonderful you truly are. Bask in that for a while. Seems to be coming from a father figure.

Sad to see you distressed and putting up with mediocre. Never underestimate how this can drag you down and lose sight of the big picture and yourself.

Be kind and gentle to yourself.
Do or treat yourself to something special, doesn’t matter what it is as long as it makes you happy.

Have a good weekend!

Gallica
Gallica

Hi Wish Upon a Star, thank YOU so much for this. I think that message is from my dearly departed Dad, a wonderful guy I miss everyday.

bobo-deeMM Member
bobo-dee

I love those gold shoes! Chic sophisticated yet relaxed

Unicorn SparklesMM Member
Unicorn Sparkles

This reads like a Sadge I know. Her clock ticking she went off and did the mother thing solo. And that kid is so super gorgeous and smart. … the things we found cute in our 20’s don’t cut the mustard as we get older… artist with no job, no future prospects and 20k+ credit debt is not so romantic and rosy in his 40’s. He hasn’t learnt anything… don’t get me started on internet dating posers… When I was single for a long time (10 years) I was deeply lonely and sad. The resulting darkness sometimes swallowed me whole.… Read more »

Gallica
Gallica

Hi Uni, thank you for this, you hit the nail on the head, It’s almost isolating being this single for this long. And yes, I don’t want to say I am being picky but I am using discretion and honesty when it’s just not a good fit. I won’t down date and I stick by that. I have taken Mystic’s advice to use this time and these eclipses to nourish myself and focus on self love and just Saggo along. Thank you for the advice!

PegasusMM Member
Pegasus

Am no fan of online dating, never tried and don’t want to. IF i wanted to meet a man, i would go to the Yacht Club, Races, exotic car exhibitions, places where men hang out in real life so you can check the energy and observe before approach. Most women don’t seem to realise their power and often settle for less which brings angst and heart ache. THAT’S not fun. One doesn’t have to be a femme fatale to be a seductress but it does take strategy if one has a relationship in mind because men sure ain’t what they… Read more »

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

I agree with your strategy re where men hang out. Pegasus – can you comment on why you don’t want to meet a man? (If I am reading your comment correctly)

PegasusMM Member
Pegasus

Have turned 70. If you don’t use you lose it.. It would take a very patient loving man to get this orchid to bloom again, they need special potting mix and temperature.

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

I see. Clarissa Pinkola Estes said in her 70s the urge to mate never goes away though. Do you still feel that way?

PegasusMM Member
Pegasus

Wonder if Clarissa had a Daisy Dog to worship and adore her and keep her warm at night?
#women who run with the pitbulls.

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

Pegs can you please start an introduction service for mature women?? 😀

Jokerman
Jokerman

So, I have some idea where women hang out, but is there places you’ve thought of, that women hang out at, that l probably haven’t thought about? Ta.

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

What kind of women do you like?

Jokerman
Jokerman

Crazy, sensitive and feisty!!!

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

Lol. OK I’m thinking yoga for the crazy and sensitive bit. That sounds like a woman trying to manage chronic PMS and there’s a tonne of those. Also at the OBGYN office but it might be difficult to explain why you’re there. Anything new agey would also be a good place to look. Get regular massages/acupuncture etc at the local healing joint and just go super early for your appointments to check out the clientele. The feisty thing is a bit different though. I’d say definitely boxing classes. Corporate after work bars and lunch time meeting locales. Look for places… Read more »

Jokerman
Jokerman

OBGYN; only to give a lift or pickup someone.
I did yoga a while ago and l was like a curiosity esp as it was redneck territory where they’d never seen a man go along. Of course I thought I was in heaven. I have to look into just finding yoga in whatever place l find myself in.

Interesting point about environmental and community organizations. I love people to be passionate. Being married as long as l was has left me a bit clueless re this stuff.
I do have two potentials atm.

Cherry MoonMM Member
Cherry Moon

HSR. Jm.
XOX

Jokerman
Jokerman

ThanX Beetlejuice

milleunanotte
milleunanotte

Yes have beautiful day! HB, Jk/Pf xx

Jokerman
Jokerman

ThanX MN.

Pi
Pi

Hahaha
*Pf leans casually against wall of obgyn office*
*Fixes gaze on attractive brunette*
*”Sooo, what brings you here? D’ya come here often?”*
*Brunette is 7 months pregnant*

Jokerman
Jokerman

Bloody hilarious. I [think] I’ve done that in other contexts but l’d be too shy to be caught out like that. But you have got the hair colour right.

Pi
Pi

It’s not like you’ve never mentioned your thing for brunettes before.. 😛

Pi
Pi

Lead guitar of competing battle of the bands thing? Live music . Local art exhibition openings. Full of chicks. Depends on the art though.

emgMM Member
emg

Tactical response. Crazy hot matrix. I fell about laughing but then I’m a unicorn !

Jokerman
Jokerman

Unicorn? Most ppl fall about laughing when l say shit. I’m being dogmatic, earnest and forthright and the listener thinks its a comedy routine. I think my face is as dumb as my brain is smart.

ChrysalisMM Member
Chrysalis

Women are everywhere, PF. I’m sure you’ve thought of all these but anyway – exhibition openings, festivals, writing courses, evening classes, running groups, tennis clubs, river guardians, volunteering at dog shelters, cooking classes, you name it. Classes to do with self improvement are especially full of women.

Jokerman
Jokerman

I feel like you hit the nail on the head. My 2H Virgo Stellium is turboed by my 6H Sat in Cap sees me just working; that’s very Earth! Work man, work….even when l haven’t got a job.
My van will be driveable tomorrow as I’m nearing the end of it’s major restoration. My trailer is 95% done. So l gotta get out is what l get from your reply. I’ll have to do any of that, those suggestions, casually as my work will take me to differing places.

ChrysalisMM Member
Chrysalis

The local libraries and community centres wherever you’re headed will probs have loads of things on and very cheap / free.

Jokerman
Jokerman

Thanks, this thread has been most instructive. I do struggle with all my Outre Planet’s stuff. I’m just too crazy for most ppl. I’ve given up trying to hide it and besides that’s fake. People think I’ve, variously, escaped from the asylum or I’m a cereal killer; corny joke l know, oh, l made a meal of that. “Asylum” (Supertramp) “Jimmy Cream was keen, his brain wal always winnin’, I can’t keep tabs on mine, it’s really quite a joke I see him down the road, I ask if he’d be willing To lend me 15p – I’m dying for… Read more »

Gallica
Gallica

“…because men sure ain’t what they used to be…” YES and YES again. Strategy is something I hadn’t considered before in my online dating saga, still not going back on and rolling the dice on meeting someone the organic way as you suggested. We shall see…rules or not! 🙂

PegasusMM Member
Pegasus

What do i think? Last night had a dream lover, it was a real lover from aeons ago who was magnificent but 20 years younger, so i didn’t stay in contact when he moved o/s.
It was The Best experience, woke this morning with love vibes pinging from me, and no need to make breakfast for him.

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

Lonely Saggo I know how you feel. Don’t know if that helps but I do. It sounds like you re doing really well despite the loneliness and moving forward. For the first time in my life I started the online dating this week. So this post is timely. So glad you reminded us MM about The efficient Virgo dater. I will have to adopt her methodology. Not sure how to say “I only want to meet in person and I only check my messages once a week” without sounding cold and demanding. Any males on here have any suggestions?

PegasusMM Member
Pegasus

Not male BUT ‘i only want to meet in person and only check my messages once a week’ is no way cold and demanding’ it is self respect!

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

Thanks for the support Pegasus.

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

I went online a couple of months ago, and went off again… Got berated by a manbaby for not responding to his message for 3 days! (first message mind you) *and* for not *showing my face properly* in my photo. My friend who’s also mature age, has met a guy she’s seeing but as he’s committed to polygamy, I wouldn’t go out with him! She went on quite a few dates and had a few sexual encounters but it seemed to me like her standards were too low. When I scroll through the men on POF (her account) they all… Read more »

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

I *totally* agree on saying ‘I only want to meet in person’. Don’t waste time messaging, they are often totally different IRL, plus lots of them want to message indefinitely… Good luck getting them to actually turn up on a date, as well. Lol

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

Well I have been single all my life and have to face facts this could be because my standards have always been too high. This is a real defensive mechanism from what I’ve read. So I’m going to give it a go. Yes I think only meeting in person is a good litmus test for dickheads. I’m going to do it.

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

Great. Report back!

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

I don’t really think standards can be *too high* either lol. I know I’d rather be single than with someone for the sake of having a BF. Probs why I’ve been single for years too!

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

Lol. I will report back. I’ve always felt the same. What’s the point of being with someone you’re only half into. But I saw a School of Life video where they admonished everyone to settle in some respects. It resonated. And I am a Scorpio. So even if this tactic doesn’t work I am lighting the old rigid ways on fire to create something new.

Pi
Pi

I saw one option iny travels, “not into pen pals”
Maybe you can add something like, let’s meet instead. Lots of time to think up a good reply because I just check my messages once a week 🙂

BLISS WITCHMM Member
BLISS WITCH

I love pen pals. Are you not into them in general or just not into them when you’re trying to date?

I’ve got Uranus/Venus and Sun/Neptune in the 3rd house…….. so that may also be why I *love* pen pals. I’m a dreamer.

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

I spend too much time alone as it so I’d far prefer to meet in person. Plus I want to avoid the jerk offs using multiple screens to lie to multiple women to hedge their bets. I make a decision. I act on it. I succeed or I learn for the next round. Stringing people along to stay “safe” I find repellant. Some pen pals would be awesome if you’ve got avoid mix already it would be good to make new online friends. I’ve lived in a lot of places so have heaps of people I communicate with only online.

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

YES! Good one Pi. I might use this copy. Thanks buddy

ÁNLEIFRMM Member
ÁNLEIFR

Male here.. I am not doing the online dating thing anymore but I did it for awhile. For me, my recommendations would be don’t use photos all filtered out. Girls are posting only filtered pics and it is absolutely horrible when you meet in person and they look completely different than you thought, instant turnoff immediately! Don’t just show face pics either, include at least 1 photo of your whole self, not being shallow but again when you meet in person and someone thinks you look like X and you look like Z it automatically causes a disconnect. Just be… Read more »

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

Thanks Anleifer. I appreciate the honest feedback. I am 90kgs and I think I look OK but it’s also totally fine with me if I am too large for even the majority of men so I was planning on putting a full length pic. If you have issues with large….I am not for you. You and lots of others on this thread have affirmed it’s OK to only want to meet in person. Thanks for that. I will happily take the lessons from those that have gone before me and just cut to in person dates. For the interested. All… Read more »

Jokerman
Jokerman

“I only want to meet in person and I only check my messages once a week”
It’s laying the template out for how you are. What shitz me about online dating is that most won’t reply even though you tick all or, at least, most of the criteria. It’s in the communication, no-one enjoys not know the rules, or template, or whatever you call it. It’s a very dry forum and l believe you have to show credibility by following thru with at least some form of consistent behaviour. Generally speaking.

ScorpintheSky
ScorpintheSky

Well good point about the consistent behaviour. That goes for real life as well as online behaviour. Thanks for the encouragement and for your opinion.

Gallica
Gallica

Scorp how is the online territory? Have you implemented the Virgo approach?

It helps heaps to know there are others in the same predicament, strength in numbers or something like that. However I am not subscribing to the verbal belly aching some of my single gf’s have adopted. I find that so detrimental to staying positive about the situation.

BrightEye5MM Member
BrightEye5

I’m not a fellow Sagg but I can totally relate to the crap online dating situation, the ever ticking biological clock and desperately looking for signs – any bloody sign – that my single status would change. All last year, Mystic kept telling me a big love would appear and by Christmas I’d decided it was all bullshiz as nothing I tried worked. Then at the last minute I went to a New Years Eve party and randomly met a fellow Gem guy who seems to be the love of my life. The one I’ve been waiting for. I don’t… Read more »

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

Awesome, BE! I’ve also been getting the offers of love sincere and foretold Tarot constantly, page/king of cups etc. etc. and the lovers in the 7th for a couple of years no… not a sausage (so to speak)… not even any dates. I had a crush on a younger guy I was friends with for a while but it never quite happened, there was a bit of a spark between us. Anyway now he’s got a more suitable (younger and fertile) GF and we’re still mates. I go through stages of ‘oh bugger it, I’m happy on my own (mostly)’… Read more »

EricaMM Member
Erica

as a fellow sag 8th houser, sooo can relate but no wise words to uplift you with since Im still caught in the vortex of Rs (when not in thick depression from too much loss and heartache and door matting these last four hard years). desperately hoping its going to spit me out soon back – so need a reset… good luck X

MelindaMM Member
Melinda

Sadge AC (ruler Jupiter in 1st house not-so-fluffy Capricorn) – and I’m totally on the self-love trip, I never thought it could happen, but it is happening, I realized, that this is the only way to remove all the inside-outside crap from my life!

PlutoMoonMM Member
PlutoMoon

I’m also a Sadge ASC, Jupiter in Scorpio in the 11th, and I am on the self-love trip as well. I think Saturn through Sagittarius made me next-level my awareness around no longer settling for less than I deserve or want, so unfortunately (or fortunately) that has put me in the single category for about 3+ years now, which I actually mostly enjoy. Tried online dating – hated it. There are times of loneliness, when I desperately long for someone to trade foot and back massages with, among other things, but overall I think I need this time to just… Read more »

Pandora
Pandora

Hey, fellow Sagg, at least you you’re talking about having convinced yourself you didn’t have a time for a relationship during Saturn cluster-fuq as if it is past tense. At least you tried online dating. At least you haven’t given up hope. At least you still want something. I am now of the age where – to vaguely paraphrase something apropos Mystic said – singledom has become such a damp cloak (or something), and where energy to put myself out there plus deal with the job is so minimal (introvert – on weekends need sleep catch up, workout, and processing… Read more »

flashfireMM Member
flashfire

Fellow Saggo here going thru not entirely dissimilar stuff. I’ve been trying to fresh start, revamp, reignite my life (biz and personal) too but keep getting caught in strange pools of possibly ancestral angst/bygone shit too. I’ve been attributing it to Jupiter in Scorpio trucking through the Saggo twelfth house (although of course transiting a different house in my actual natal chart due to ascendant). I’m trying to hold the long view, keep purging, keep clearing the space for Jovial Jupes into Saggo after Halloween, but there have been moments of back sliding and dreams similar to what you are… Read more »

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