Last Exit To Saturn

Filed in Saturn

Hey Mystic,

I know you are ALWAYS busy so I never expect a reply of course, but I’m a writer and astrological nut as we know, so I sometimes feel compelled to share.  

Well- 

This Gemini Full Moon could not have been weirder, even with some level of expectancy going into it.  Ran into the ex-lover of ALL ex-lovers who came into my life LITERALLY as Saturn finally dipped into Sagittarius for real in 2015.  We had an on and off and god-awful affair which I will not detail, but it for some reason left me completely shell-shocked and broken for an unusually long period of time considering the breadth of the whole ordeal.  I blame the Pisces contacts in our charts, The Saturn-Neptune squares and the fact that within a few months of us parting ways he Pisces’d his way into an entire different lifepath, equipped with new exotic locale and exotic BRIDE to go with.   I could barely get a date!  

Long story short, I saw him this weekend which killed me at first OF COURSE since we have  gnarly karmic ties… but at the same time this encounter called attention to the fact that I have grown so much in the past two years, I would never tolerate or participate in the checked out non-committal sleezebag shit that went down when he was in his pre-Bridal restaurant owner stage.  Get this- I recently created these one word Oracle cards with a planetary symbol to accompany the word and the one I pulled Saturday?  KARMA

Anywho…I’ve written numerous poems basically all centered around this Saturn Saggi shitshow relationship and this is my last, thought I would share.  Well, last for now – I’m hoping ever LOL

Thanks for reading, and being the queen of EVERYTHING

The Last Days of Saturn in Sagittarius

For ten minutes I waited by the door
Last night, Hovering

Halfway in – Halfway out
Fifteen minutes Before closing

I couldn’t think straight after seeing you
And the moon was in Gemini
Counting on two hands all of the reasons
I wanted to say goodbye one last time.

None of them made sense but I came pretty close.
Last I heard, you were married at Burning Man and living in Mexico

I said to my friend Paul “Do you think I should say Something?”
But I knew the answer.  I left still wanting to see your face,

Also praying I’d never see you again.  One foot at a time Crawled out
To the street Lingering awhile, I heard the music from outside still playing
And thought about going back.

Tried so hard not to look behind me
To see if you were leaving but of course- I failed, looked back four times,
And said to myself, “Is this really it?” while lighting up a cigarette on the curb.

Sitting in the cold, I realized I don’t love you anymore.
Hailed a taxi to another club and had a cocktail to celebrate.

JH.

WOW – brilliant perspective and i think those moments when time collides and someone whose very presence was once upon a time SO poignant re-manifests but in a different dimension are SUPER Saturnine.

And i feel like these last days of Saturn in Sagittarius (for another thirty years) will present us with many such moments.   And i am also happy to be dubbed Queen of Everything – thank you!

Image:  Sabrina the Teenage Witch

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mesangeMM Member
mesange

Weird, I saw an old lover, on another existential plane, at the train station on Dec. 10th, with his family, wearing white jeans and a pom pom hat, I didn’t turn around. The affair was 12 years ago, last Jupiter in Saturn, I’ve never really gotten over it, a three month affair. Sounds similar, pain, poetry, karma, but I never figured out why astrologically. I found a past life where I was his sex slave. Weird. But I’m strangely distant from it now, like watching it from afar. Like the pain was so great you’re cautarized? It’s late, it’s timeless.… Read more »

PiMM Member
Pi

Mesange, you’ve somehow also described the situation I experienced with the Capricorn a couple of years ago. Except I didn’t even form a relationship with him . I thought it was love and maybe it was but I’ve since become wary of painting any “intense” feeling as love. I could not find any reason to explain how I experienced *so much* pain about not being with someone who I wasn’t ever I involved with . Two tarot readers noted some kind of soul contract, one mentioned that my femininity was not respected in the past connection (her words), you mention… Read more »

cj
cj

Loved the poem.

SagitaureanMM Member
Sagitaurean

JH here and I forgot to mention that said Karma oracle card – of course the planetary symbol was Saturn – DUH

Maggie
Maggie

Oh woe, saturn in sag has ripped my life to shreds… torched the edifices of any value with such flames my tears made little impact snuffing them out.

All alone for now
saturn return in seventh
it can get better?

SagitaureanMM Member
Sagitaurean

I feel like people harsh Saturn so hard and I get it I really do –
HOWEVER

after undergoing a Saturn-Pluto transit, followed by a Saturn return, followed by a NEVERending Venus square Pluto over the course of a 5 year period a few years back

I can definitely say that while yes the dense and heavy energy of Saturn is daunting and non-sexy… eventually it begins to become oddly hot when you firm up your standards and you better know what you want.

and it’s like a kiss on the cheek compared to Pluto medicine

SagitaureanMM Member
Sagitaurean

anyway short story yes it will get better !! Besos!!

babysinclairMM Member
babysinclair

That’s some full moon shit right there. Sounds like a blessing to me, to have it confirmed that you don’t love him anymore. Yay for a happy ending!

Kala
Kala

Saturn return i Libra wasnt hard, I got into a committed relationship cery fast. Then problems started we moved in together and saturn in scorpio everything broke up ugly. Saturn in saggi my ascendant has been extra hard becouse squares all my stellium in pisces. I have learnt a lot about myself, self-knowledge and my Values and many things.. I just think after all the havoc and crumbling of structuresnin my life I will rebuilt with this new awareness. I am an Optimist at Heart! I believe in Magic and Love!! Even if saturn has shown me so much shadow… Read more »

milleunanotte
milleunanotte

YOU CREATED ORACLE CARDS?!?!?!?!

You are a Queen! Seriously just stop and appreciate your amazing self!

And these lines?

‘Last I heard, you were married at Burning Man and living in Mexico

I said to my friend Paul “Do you think I should say Something?” ‘

Well i frqing love them. Mind you, i like Bukowski’s poetry for exactly the same reason, which is the sudden poignant and marvellous context of the environment.

Am so curious about your Saturn placements, because under the duress of Saturn you wordsmith like a boss.

babysinclairMM Member
babysinclair

Yea I had that reaction about the oracle cards too. Love it!

SagitaureanMM Member
Sagitaurean

Hi there – JH here – My Saturn is in Scorp in the 12th, I usually attribute my writing style to my Mercury opp Pluto

thank you for your sweetness

MissDeeMM Member
MissDee

Saturn tends to show you what you don’t need to carry with you (attitudes, sides of your personality or peeps) by isolating you and throwing it / them in your face.
And when it is about to leave and move to the next level, it makes sure you don’t forget about it.

echo
echo

Well said!

seawitchmermaidMM Member
seawitchmermaid

Omg so true

Anto
Anto

Funny, I thought that was Pluto.

tw:leoMM Member
tw:leo

<3 !!!!

Annabelle
Annabelle

Woohoo!!!! Great to hear you realised you are not even on that level anymore with that scumbag! Last days of Saturn in sag has been huge for meeee… still incoming all this information re my career and my image as sagg is my tenth house! I cared so much for recognition and power… I realise the closer I got to it… ahh I don’t want it!! Not in the way that I thought it could fulfill me. I recognise now I have worked long to get the skills and experience I have now But career is just not a massive… Read more »

Scorpy
Scorpy

That’s cool. Saturn in Scorp (natal Sun in 10th) was a realization of my dreams too

annnabelle
annnabelle

Did you look to any other parts of your chart to get insight on this?

just curious to know…

Scorpy
Scorpy

Mainly Saturn in 10th. I also have Neptune conjunct my sun – so dreams came true in terms of career. But also Mars was transiting my 9th house where my natal venus Libra is – so studying art full time. The last time Saturn was in Scorp I had just finished high school and was studying as well. It’s interesting to keep track of and reflect on cycles. I’d also look at what’s aspecting MC (midheaven) There were probably other factors too. Just can’t remember them all right now. It just felt very destined and that the stars were aligned.… Read more »

Scorpy
Scorpy

oh yeah… and Neptune was (and still is) transiting my 2nd house (earned income / values etc) and trining my Sun /Neptune in 10th. It’s not even exact yet and now Jupiter is in my 10th. And soon Saturn on my Asc. More to come. 😀

I worked bloody hard for it though. Gave up and awful lot to achieve my goal. Saturn would expect no less.

So Mutable It HurtsMM Member
So Mutable It Hurts

Ugh, so ready for this last exit of Saturn. Question to MM or amazingly knowledgeable subscribers: which is more intense, Saturn in your Sun sign or Saturn Return? I was under the impression that it was Saturn Return, but all the articles re: how Saturn is for Sags right now makes me think it’s the Saturn in Sun thing…

MissDeeMM Member
MissDee

I don’t know about that So Mutable. I can tell you that – in my experience – some planet handle the tough angles of Saturn much better than others, whether it’s a Saturn return or not.

Scorpy
Scorpy

It really depends on many factors. I had the time of my life during my Saturn return. But being Saturn ruled (Cap Asc) hard work doesn’t phase me. I did take on extra responsibility at the time though. Most people would have chosen travel over a mortgage. Wise move considering the property market these days. Best decision I ever made! Saturn in Scorp wasn’t too bad personally – lots of hard work pursuing art dreams (natal sun in 10th). But the recent Chiron return. Far out. That was hardcore!! Worst transit ever! So much hurt, sadness and crying. Worst trans(h)it… Read more »

Scorpy
Scorpy

God! Not that Scorp guy again. Ugh.

It’s not me!

milleunanotte
milleunanotte

Scorpy, i know it could be a stand-off Fixed Sign Scorp to Fixed Sign Scorp in how you feel about it, but since our scorpy here was the first we got to know, could you consider changing your moniker? Just so the rest of us know which is which?

You’ve got the word-skills, so it would be appreciated, right?

Scorpy
Scorpy

the words are mine, the Gravatar isn’t. I keep signing in with different emails cos i’m not happy with the auto-gravs but I think i’ll settle for the splat above. Wish it was green though. LOL.
My chart is half fixed / half mutable. Gem NN and Mars in Virgo – I’m all about the trivial details. LOL.

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

and also… my ancient scottish ancestors (and my) motto du jour:

Dulcius ex asperis

(Sweeter after difficulty)

Getting it in a tattoo in 2018!

dark starMM Member
dark star

I love the Latin motto!

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

Sums up my first half century in 3 words 🙂

milleunanotteMM Member
milleunanotte

Must find the Latin for “Salty”

milleunanotteMM Member
milleunanotte

Oh i totally thought you were annoyed at a separate person! That Mercurial dialogue you’re having with yourself? Haha, sorry, i was tricked and confused 🙂

Glad it’s only you. There were sometimes random commenters using names already on here.

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

Me too, until I reread it. Lol

milleunanotteMM Member
milleunanotte

Oh…even a Gem! Feel less silly, now 🙂

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

lol… living like a pauper…. the thought of having money again *is* pretty hard to resist… BTDT 😀

Scorpy
Scorpy

$$ $$ signs in my eyes – as wide as saucers. Lol!

I’ve started spending already (Saggo moon trine venus Libra), knowing I’ll have money coming soon to cover it.
I need to look pretty schmick for work. So very Saturn in Cap on my Asc :))

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

Enjoy… you deserve it Scorpy x

Scorpy
Scorpy

Thanks Gemi, And fuq yeah!! I deserve it.
Was so sick of being a pauper I signed a work contact during Merc Rx. *shrugs*. $$ LOL

GemyogiMM Member
Gemyogi

I always remember a quote from Sting — who always seemed pretty angsty — he was asked ‘are you happier now you’re rich and successful’ and he said, no, but it certainly dulls the pain!

Scorpy
Scorpy

Lol!!! Love it!! So true.

alchemy-saltMM Member
alchemy-salt

I’m going to be experiencing both at once early next year

alchemy-saltMM Member
alchemy-salt

Darn, I forget the emojis don’t display on here.

LaFemmaMM Member
LaFemma

My Saturn return (in Scorpio and conjunct my moon) was brutal but very needed, I like there’s less emotional baggage because it all got dredged up during that time. I had no idea about Saturn returns at the time I just thought I was going crazy because I was miserable and crying almost every day (I also had my son during that time and then went through breaking up with his dad), it’s kind of funny in retrospect but I was questioning so much and so lost feeling. I’ve also had Pluto transiting my asc./first house since about that same… Read more »

saturnplutofluxMM Member
saturnplutoflux

I finally decided to block (on all mediums) the younger/star crossed lovers/married off to keep him away from inappropriate women/from an opposing culture lover. For his own good. He’s never going to leave me alone(sounds arrogant but I know it) – but he’s also never going to have the backbone to make choices his family doesn’t approve of. He appeared with Saturn and now he’s exiting with Saturn – whether he knows it or not lol. And I am totally fine with that – time to move on in classic Saggi style 🙂

CourtneyMM Member
Courtney

Wow wow wow…I went through a similar situation with that same timing of him coming to my life and same bizarrely prolonged shell-shock given the time it lasted and the clear character misalignment. Up to this point I haven’t had the big “run-in,” which is strange since we only live a few blocks apart. I’ve been grateful for that, but it sounds like it gave you some great realizations.

I had not even thought of the Saturn timing of it all. Here’s hoping the shift into Capricorn lifts a burden for us both. <3

Lux Interior Is My Co-PilotMM Member
Lux Interior Is My Co-Pilot

Wow.
These last days of Saturn in Saggo are just full of SO MANY MESSAGES at all turns.

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