Total Dating Recall

Filed in Venus Venusian

Stick a line of rock salt across your front threshold and set the phone to merely quiver faintly with repugnance at incoming calls or texts from particular people.

(Obviously if you are a Uranus or Pluto-person, you will have blocked them already).

It’s MARS in an open-door-all-welcome Air Trine aspect to the South Node of the Moon, portal to your past.  Venus is also involved.

What does this mean?  It means black hole of galactic fuqery time-mind warp Total Dating Recall.

Of course, many memories are pleasant but Mars square Cosmic Doctor Chiron is not interested in those.

The Total Dating Recall situations that have therapeutic benefits are likely to be the ones you have forgotten.  Repressed? Hell, yes.

But happily, the astral vibe of this weekend is SO positive that we should all be fine with Total Dating Recall. We can channel the Moon and Jupiter in Libra and do beauty care + elegant contemplation.  Or…

Get more Venus-Uranian and rebirth a healthily Punk attitude toward everything, starting with a Nietzsche-level creative destructive clean-up of media/attitude/everything.

Others might prefer to sustain their auric integrity via herbs and rituals, trusting that innate Qi, once supported, will lead them to where they need to be.

Some like to talk and talk and talk – Mars is still in Gemini, after all. This is one of the best placements for solutions and clarity via enthusiastic discussion with informed people. As opposed to trying to just SIT with your Total Dating Recall.

This is also in AIR so it’s way easier to extract the value/wisdom from the T.D.R. than it might be if this were happening in, say, a Water sign.

Thoughts?

 

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75 thoughts on “Total Dating Recall

  1. Was going to check the scheduler to see what’s up, and rationalise what’s happening but as I type I’m waiting for a call. So this post is appropriate. Yes he feels like someone I met before. We met in April just before Easter.

    • Eh my facebook profile Ive had since 2012 locked me out while I;m traveling in Eastern Europe and won’t let me back in lol, thank goodness. I’m off the grid, people think I’m either dead or have them blocked
      (sorry my humor is very sarcastic and dry, love my friends who are truly concerned but the ones who get self righteous and approach me aggressively “I THOUGHT YOU BLOCKED ME”
      Oh dont be so full of yourself, you really think I am even thinking about you while in Croatia? Yeah, right.

  2. Finally, my lack of game is paying off for me. My relationship with An = 15 minutes of wtf. My relationship with Al = 20 minutes of boredom and wondering why people were so into something as tiresome as dating.

    Done and dusted.

    Time to celebrate Mars square Chiron with donuts for breakfast.

  3. Would this also relate to the cycle of the north node i e 19 years? Thinking about a variety of relationship s i had back then which were pretty Neptune boggled, and destructive. My 12 th house is Libra in my natal chart i have Neptune there opposing my Venus on the descendant. Spent years now out of any convention al relationship and suddenly felt sad about the lack of a special person in my life. How to learn to trust at all and most especially trust my judgement. So often people are not what they seem . Hmmm

    • Huh, that is interesting. I got my wisdom teeth removed right after I met my husband. He just got his taken out, 20 years later. So much has changed.

      • Yes, this too.

        My wonderful mothering-dyke-dentist is no longer available to treat me…met her with my first partner 20 yrs ago, as I had a wisdom tooth pulled – then back to work – in my bad old fashion days…

        Times / themes must be feminine-charged – as I was hoping to re-connect with another woman, I really adore – and impossible – she is everywhere – not bound to one location – a truly Venus-uranus driven person, needing plenty of space, freedom, yet so liberating for others. I am actually heartbroken over it. It is a severing of an umbilical kind and my cancer moon is pretty sad about it, but I have to let go.

        So I have a couple of YODs – happening across my natal chart – activated – and this time I am being directed towards a stricter older male teacher who is thorough, patient. I was reluctant to fix attend to my self, this time I have little choice – must address change in attitude. Self sufficiency…

      • It’s always the teeth. Your mama and your teeth.

        Don’t want to drone on about mothers, teeth, and significant others but this is fitting right into the SN themes for me.

  4. Hmm guess I’m confused. Venus/Uranus trine NN in Leo is fire, not air, and the aspect to the SN in Aqua is a sextile, not a same-element trine, no? Maybe I just haven’t had enough coffee yet and need to do a re-read to grok properly. However you cut it it’s still a fab weekend incoming! 🙂

      • She updated it to MARS. Mars in late Gemini is indeed trine SN in late Aquarius. It originally said Venus was in the “air trine” but no, cause it’s in late Aries with Uranus and trine NN and Saturn. I like the fire grand trine energy better, myself. But she’s right, Mars in late Gem trine the South Swamp in Aqua could lead to some batty encounters with weird exes.

  5. This is one thing I do appreciate about being Venus/Pluto – this is never a problem. Venus/Pluto is the Kiss of Death for relationships that go south – it’s like having a mandatory DNR order (yes, as in Do Not Resuscitate) automatically slapped on your relationships. I do not give up easily in love and invest of myself heavily, so if things got bad enough to flatline I’m not pulling the paddles out, ever. All my exes know this, so wouldn’t bother to reach out. A part of me may still love them in some way for what they were to me at the time, but I’d never venture back over the river Styx no matter how amicable the split. There is no ill-will at all, just a profound and peaceful understanding that our purpose in each other’s lives has been fulfilled. I am never the same person after a relationship ends, anyway – that’s part of the beauty; it produces deep and lasting transformation. Why waste all the energy it took to get that upgrade by rekindling a relationship with someone who would assume they are relating to a previous-era version of me? No – the moving finger writes; and, having writ, moves on…I wish them well in life and much happiness, but it’s just not going to be with me.

    A Venus/Pluto Beatitude:

    Blessed is the lover who loves me in my darkness and becomes the agent of my rebirth; a thousand times I die for you to rise again each time as Vice is alchemically transmuted into Virtue. Set my heart ablaze and let this render to ash all that does not truly serve Love ! © LV, 2017

    • Ah yes, it is lovely – thank you – I know this devotion – its rare – even to pass into this phase – for self love, intimacy…

      Yet, how do you this person is the lover willing to assist you through all this?…

      Serious questions…as in clarity versus fantasy…

      • It’s not one partner in a vacuum; rather the collective experience of each and every one of them. Every partner I’ve had – and the subsequent demise of that relationship – pushed me deeper and deeper into my own psyche so I could root out what needed to be healed. They have all been instrumental in my transformation – I would not have half the level of self-awareness that I do if I did not have the mirror of their gaze prompting me to understand that ultimately I am my own lowest common denominator in Love. Every time I’ve loved and lost, it’s burned off another layer of darkness/dysfunction. And I’m going full phoenix, baby.

        I think the most difficult thing about being Venus/Pluto is having the profound soul-level understanding that you must take the loss and make a sacrificial Offering upon the pyre of Love again and again until you burn clean. The default tendency is to resist this and hold fast to defunct scenarios, but the sooner we make peace with the process of letting go and do this with kindness, grace, and love, the sooner we find the Light at the end of the tunnel.

        • Yes I relate – I am Venus Pluto afflicted now – thanks to very intense transit of 5th…

          At least it trines my Pluto 1st…

          I’m unhappy however its too late; I have a weird thing going on with progressed – both mercury venus in Pisces 5th…conjunct, also conjunct natal vertex – and they trine progressed scorpio 1st…

          Your writing really aptly describe it poetically & succinctly. Thank you very much for your sharing your of such wonderful, yet painful insights

    • Brava! I am also a Venus/Pluto native, this spoke to me on a soul level. The VP energy also seems to apply to certain friendships. It is extremely all or nothing, Pluto to the nth degree. Nothing but true love can survive the Venus/Pluto energy imo. If its not real, it cannot survive in my orbit. It will literally fall apart. Or you know, fall through the holes of my plutonic sieve. Only the gold remains. Thank you for sharing your words of gold LV.

      • Oh most certainly – close personal one-on-one companions (as in our closest and best friends) definitely fall under the dominion of Venus as well. Thank you so much for your kind words!

    • Totally love(!!) this fellow Venus/Pluto.

      You might enjoy watching the film “Pandora and the Flying Dutchman” by Albert Lewin (Sun conjunct SN – hence its amazing flavour). He wrote & directed it and is a favourite of the surrealists & literary crowd. The film actually begins & ends with the Omar Khayyam quote you mention “The moving finger writes…”

      It’s a really stylish surrealist film (1951) with Ava Gardner & James Mason as the leads & it’s themes include the measure of Love, Time, death, redemption, salvation through love etc. all very SN/Pluto/Venus in flavour. I’ve mentioned it on the blog before, but it really fits this current theme i think.

    • Venus opp Pluto & that’s my credo, too! or as Fleetwood Mac put it, ‘Never Going Back Again’ 🙂

  6. so that’s what’s going on! I have a history of people who’s names I’ve forgotten suddenly appearing on the doorstep, suitcase in hand, ready to move in and pick up where they left off but this past week has been something else…

  7. Oh this is so eerie. A friend from grade school thru college (who was a big part of my social circle growing up) took his own life on Monday. Now we are all picking up the pieces… I’ve spent the last two days contacting people I haven’t spoken to in five years or so, so we can reminisce and try to make sense of it all. This is including someone I had a romantic past with, who I haven’t spoken to in years and with good reason. It feels like that movie the Big Chill. Glad to know the main vibe this weekend is Air… trying to keep myself talking about what’s transpired as a way of finding catharsis.

  8. Ha! Really funny! This morning I was going through Poems! All the tortured romantic ones! Throwing out all the hopeless onesl! Only keeping those that are creatively interesting. I also threw out a letter. No longer hoarding the pain. In one door, out the other. I think that’s all the visitation I’ll do, thank you very much.

  9. Someone blessed me with a soul protection prayer via archangel Michael today, it was over beers in an ancient city, in Latin, a Capricorn would you believe, unexpected but actually amazing, also the double Pisces triple Aries has been on my mind, a lot, the defining figure for the south node conjunct Chiron transit over my sun, also you know, compatible, sigh, I don’t know

    I am as much some one else’s #blocked as they are mine, its like trying to remove salt from an over-salted soup. Who cares, just change the recipe

    • The more I think about this the more I am connecting huge segments of past lives, it’s hard to explain, maybe I can’t or it is late or something, Chiron in my 10th yet to be met by Uranus / venus and mercury coming up to conjunct Jupiter Lilith in 11th, Jupiter still on Pluto IC – that is a pretty interesting idea, intersection of my own personal sense of Origin with a student of theology (Jupiter), we really did go into major 12th house themes, I really love talking about these, I swear this guy had a 12th house sun or significant aspect.

      • Yes I have north node now just in my 12th, (conjunct progressed Jupiter in leo) and it is still conjunct my 12th house natal jupiter in Virgo – that is conjunct my asc.

        The Venus uranus transit in my 8th, saturn in 4th (disciplines of health)…

        amazing insights, spiritual transportation…

          • I jus thought the intersection of past lives might be somehow connected to asteroid hectare?

            Recently I think it was mentioned here as being in Gemini? Perhaps it is relevantly aspected or placed with regard to neptune?

            I didn’t check, just guessing as I agree some elements do seem at this time “fated” and good that you have esoteric influences around to contribute to your interests & relationships too…

            • That was meant to be hectate…

              Wondering if the uranus – venus – north node – saturn grand trine is then activated

              It is in play with my north south nodes too

              Strange how some things return, you think they have gone – however it demands to be resolved

    • St Michael as a soul protection vibe is excellent, a super fiery force of justice and love and creative force (boundaries even?). Haute Leo to the max and good vibes for nn Leo. Also I love that it was in Latin- my first foreign language. This definitely could be a past lives meeting / blessing

      • Thank you dark star… The combination of levity, chance, (alcohol? Not sure) and deep context was wonderful, the last couple of days did feel like a twist of fate.. greatly appeals to the mercury Pisces in me
        There was def a node situation, I will consider this more, thank you

      • Hahaha yep! Potatoes and cream do it every time. I think the recipe for blocking sadness, lost love and also unfortunately psychic awareness consists of equal parts carbs and dairy.

        I know I’m in a rut when I catch myself on the couch with a massive bowl of potato bake or tuna Mornay.

    • Aw Pi, that’s a gorgeous experience. The unexpected ones are the best and usually bear a gift. 🙂

  10. Mars is transiting my 12th, and SN, my 9th. No communiques from my past….yet. Not hoping for any, either!

    I’m pretty much at a clean slate right now, have gotten rid of everyone in near or far orbit from my ‘dating’/romantic life. Feels good, and quiet. Perhaps I’ll begin anew after next week……all that’s on my mind now is the hearing next Thursday where I’ll be petitioning for my rent reduction due to living with rain coming through my ceiling all this past winter. As far as ‘looking back’ though, I’ve had to review tons and tons of paperwork and correspondence with my landlords from the past seven years. Ugh….. nothing positive about that, much less romantic or sexy, but it IS a business relationship, so maybe it’s that type of relationship that for some reason I’m having to review…..it’s pretty painful and awful. These people have treated me terribly!

    They are, in a way, a last vestige of ‘abusive people’, the category of which I’ve always seemed to have somewhere in my life, either personal, work, home, etc. So maybe this is my last stand against having abusive people have any influence on my life, or be anywhere near my life at all. I have eradicated all other abusive people from my life and am pretty good at not letting any new ones in at this point.

    I will definitely be winning some sort of rent reduction, that is certain, and that will enrage the landlords greatly. Let them be enraged, the fuckers!
    Mars will still be in my 12th during the hearing next Thursday, but will have moved into Cancer, which is my rising sign, so maybe that will give me some extra assertiveness during the hearing. At this type of hearing you represent yourself, no lawyer, so I need all the assertiveness and confidence and energy/stamina I can get!

  11. I thought no way is this going to get me. No more romance. Natal Venus square Neptune needs walls of steel. Too much work on my mind anyway. But it did. Ouch. Total dating recall. All in my head and heart. Chiron has been on my everything.

    Blue jays have been in my life this spring. More than other years. There is a bird sitting on a pyramid of bricks in my back yard with like 5 blue jays fighting for her attention. And she gives zero fuqs. I live with two cats. She gives zero fuqs. Turns her back to me. Tussles with a few in the bamboo. Moves on. I didn’t know female jays mated that way. Wherever she lands, the boys follow. Then she picks one, they rob other birds – mate for life. And she is taking her time making a decision cause its June already. Good for her.

  12. Totally yes!!!! Had one I had forgotten about message me for my birthday the other day. It was really nice to be honest. They told the most loveliest story about how they remembered the jasmine from my backyard when we dated and how they were smelling it in Nice France on a night walk and recalling our time together. I was kind of wowed out since there aren’t too many of my exes that are that keen on me. It was healing to realise that past relationships aren’t all loathing and regret, and it was nice to hear that from Nice.

    • Aww that’s nice. No pun intended. I agree btw. Although I don’t always make the best choices, I’d like to think that we can cut ourselves as much slack as we’d do for someone else.. loathing and regret are indeed strong and very unpleasant words! Maybe sometimes we can just allow ourselves the simple possibility that things just didn’t work out, and that’s actually quite ok too..

  13. Nope. Nada. Zero. Rien. There’s no one I could ever get a zombie love from the past call or message.
    Seriously. I’ve done such a deep decluttering in my life I have no one to be haunted by.
    Ex lovers have crossed my mind recently but more out of boredom. And they haven’t been more than a thought; they pass by and they leave.

  14. I have a crush on my creative writing classmate and feel like an effing idiot for it. I have never liked a younger guy before. He is 24 and I am 37. It would be nice to be friends as I really love his work and we have similar taste. I am unhappy about aging so that probably doesn’t help things. The good thing about my new crush is it helped me get over one I had on a friend, who younger guy is far superior to (or just more like the kind of person I would want to date). Wah. Wahhhh. I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. I am just peeking at him during class. Maybe it is my Venus in Cap and Mars in Virgo but I can’t even fantasise without letting reality creep in.

    • I’ve had a similar conversation with friends. Crushing on younger guys. My moon in cap is borderline Cruel when it comes to my self assessment of chances, how I must come across to his type (read: decrepit), etc, although my male friends tend to say ‘are you kidding, we’d have no objection to such things’ … Sooo, I can relate, and class / lecture room crushes are a thing, maybe just chill and exhale and maybe you guys can catch up over a coffee to chat about the next assignment, you know, …

  15. HAHAHAHAHA. I should’ve read this post before I went out last night in the area I left to escape my ex. Oh, we won’t see him, I thought. Don’t let it stop you going to neukolln & hanging with these new ppl.& yet. There he was at the bar, dancing, at this tiny party it turned out mutual friends had organised. I said hi, freaked out, ignored him, ended up dancing with him, then finally talking together.
    Like everything in this karmic relationship, it was pure fate. Finally this week I felt that I was over him & my other ex, finally ready to let go. Last night put it to the test, & I passed. The sick feeling attraction/ repulsion will never go away, but considering any pursuit of it – what ifs, other self-torturing – is gone. Normally after an encounter with him, I cannot think of anything else for 24 hours, but I have a pleasing amount of mental space. I’m very much doing the Venus-Uranian end of things (Venus just trined my natal Uranus as the conjunction happened, I think that’s what set me free last week) & exploring my sexuality, queerness & independence – truly loving being single for the first time in my life, & planning to stay that way!

  16. The minute I finished writing my peaceful comment I got and ex twitting me for the whole evening.
    I hoped he stopped and he did.
    Oh @mystic: one way or another you end up being so “on point”

  17. Ughhh I thought I’d managed to sneak past this south node suction zone after I deactivated Facebook last week and threw out a whole bunch of energy dragging clutter from the cupboard in my yoga room. but just woke up to emails from an ex scorp who’s been trying to wriggle back for months but who I haven’t heard from in a fortnight so thought it was settled, and a barrage of emails and missed calls from my scorp boss who was supposed to be on leave for the last few days but has no boundaries and micro manages my shifts even when not actually present on site. *Sigh* , man, when people do low scorp, they drop it lowwwwwwwwwww

  18. Possible weird-arse telepathic ‘moment’ with the Libran Lover. Unsure exactly what happened. But noted down the times. Waiting to see if he mentions anything tomorrow night.

  19. No actual physical, telecommunicative or digital contact with anyone *but* woke up yesterday morning from a horrific PTSD nightmare about one of my exes who was horrifically psychologically manipulative and I didn’t realise till it was almost too late. I’m gone and free now from all abusers in my life and am in a wonderful place with a supportive partner who chooses to grow and evolve with me despite the hard work of doing so through trauma but always find these random nightmares annoying as hell.

  20. I was going through my spam folders and found a heap of texts and emails from Weatherbeaten Virgo sent over the past six months. The last one was sent the day I checked the folders, imploring me to respond or else “this will be the last one.” I deleted them all and thankfully haven’t heard from him since.
    I have the SN on my Venus/Dsc conjunction right now so I’m half-expecting some mummified corpse to hobble out of the swamp. I’ll keep you posted 🙂

    • Not sure if anyone will still be reading this post but for the record – would you believe someone turned up. I actually shuddered in revolt of those horrible times. Ex-bestie from 25 years ago, whose brother I almost married after he got out of jail (don’t ask). Out of the blue ex-bestie sent me a friend request. Had a little look and of course they are all there, the whole toxic clan. Ex-fiance is single. Block, block, block. Ugggh. *Eyes threshold, reaches for salt*

      • Wowsers that’s a lot of material to pore over (and obvs congratulate yourself for having come so far that you can look back without twinges of ‘what if’ ).

        Crack the champers and do a lil swamp dance!

  21. Not too many rattlings from the romantic boneyard for me (just the scorp but that skeleton will rustle for eternity) – but funnily enough a whole bunch of old connections getting in touch and asking me to find their kick-starter projects…I think four in the last week! And a random email with no title or even content from a girl I met on a bus in Peru and dropped peyote with in the mountains… Is that still Mars tickling the south node or maybe it’s Mars opposing my natal south node in the seventh house y’alls. Was hoping for more of a jooj as Mars went conjunct my ascendant today but it went more conjunctivitis… At work with a sudden onset fever and sore throat boo hiss Mars, your chuck Norris snap kick to my face was so unnecessary

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