Dear Mystic.

It occurred to me that being the Venusian type and/or with a fairly Venusian subscriber squad, you might be able to offer some sage advice.

Does natal Saturn in Leo mean I will forever not be able to form a good relationship with hairdressers? Or at least it will always be an Effort? I’ve always taken that placement at a much more (blah) existential level but maybe Hair As Superficial But Constant Thing is also in the mix.

Much like the Katakan-Taurean who wrote in previously where her relationship with the Leo guy went south fast, I sometimes find the Golden Mean of hairdressers and then after just a few appointments suddenly it all turns to crap and I walk out with Soccer Mum hair – the upmarket places are the WORST for this – or some kind of copper shade (NO) when I wanted blonde. I don’t understand. I think I’m being clear in what I want. Is it the Pisces in me? Too easy going?

It’s got to a point where I just can’t even deal with yet again going in to say ‘hi um this is wrong can u pls fix’ . Does the Leo squad frequenting MM know anything? I’m low maintenance at best – I leave my hair alone, it leaves me alone. My hair looks best weeks or months after the cut. Wild and free, etc. I wish it didn’t then turn into “Street Witches of the Gutter Vol. IX” shortly after that. Do I need to take the Sadge, Virgo rising, Mercury in Scorpio friend with me as Enforcer-Translator? Help pls? <3

Love pi xox

Dear Pi,

I would actually like to see anything in the Street Witches Of The Gutter series.  My idea for a guerilla television series is called Vibe Police and it’s where people are asked to extrapolate on who they think other people spotted in the street are and what they are doing – no filter, no barriers. And then the people themselves are interviewed to see if any of it is accurate. The Vibe Police can go off fashion, vibe, the phase of the Moon that day – all cues taken and utilized.

ANYWAY,  okay so no i don’t think Saturn in Leo creates this bad hair karma situation but it is perfectly likely that, at the energetic level, you somehow conflate your hair communication – possibly clothes also – with more Saturnine issues like status, father irks, bureaucracy etc. And you care more about the outcome.

As this happens to nigh everyone i have known, i think you need to just be insanely clear about what you want. Ensure you have a consultation before anyone makes a move and over state that it is important to you that your hair turns out precisely as you have described.

There is actually a huge churn rate with hairdressers because of this sort of thing: once you’re a regular, people can nod off a bit. Or, because you’re not wanting anything “creative”, you might be actually boring to someone dreaming of Fashion Week extravaganzas featuring models with hair you can go nuts with, full bore Kendrick, Space Dust and networking. Never mind that this is irrational as regular clients wanting the same damn thing – classic, beautiful, making the most of their hair – are cornerstone revenue.

I think you take the North Node in Leo as your cue to own this space and saunter in with a list of demands – ten minute scalp massage, the exact color you want and you supply the pictures. If they can’t make that happen on YOUR hair, they need to explain why – it can’t be because they see you as Soccer Mom rather than Alien Witch.

Although Soccer Mom is going to be HUGE with Uranus into Taurus – can you not see this?

Image: God Hair Salon – Hong Kong