Retro-Venusian Read: All The Single Ladies

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All The Single Ladies – by Rebecca Traister – is an utterly brilliant read and it’s not just about “single ladies.” Rather, it is super readable lengthy reportage on women, money, economic independence and how that has influenced sex, identity and relationships. Its scope is incredible – though admittedly America-centered – going from the newly female-run households of freed slaves after the Civil War to the impact of shows such as Mary Tyler Moore back in the day.  It’s also hilarious – she has a penchant for skewering a particular genre of conservative columnist and their attacks on single mothers, women who “work too much”, women who are “selfish” and those who “break up the family unit.”  But it’s not a polemical rant – one of her key points is that relationships with gender equity work out way better for both parties. She makes a powerful case for how female economic empowerment (compared to – say – the lives of our grandmothers) has changed everything and that there are powerful forces working against that or – at best – not quite with the program yet.  If you’re looking for a substantial and inspirational Amazonian read for a Retro-Venus reset – whether or not you are single – i totally recommend this book. Thoughts?


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18 thoughts on “Retro-Venusian Read: All The Single Ladies

  1. Thank you, MM – this is great – another book for the growing pile.

    I was a young girl growing up watching The Mary Tyler More Show & it totally inspired me to be an independent woman.

    We also need to know where we really stand, how we stand and how we are being cast and misrepresented in the media – as all is not as it seems and we can’t get complacent. I really recommend a documentary – free on youtube – called “Miss Representation” (2011)

    • There was a fantastic piece on utube a few years back about women in Italian media and how badly they are objectified. Can’t for the life of me find the link but was a very interesting watch.

      But brings home how slow change is… if any

  2. Why, I was just ranting about this recently on social media 🙂 there was a poster, something like *save families – end feminism*
    omg the lolz.
    I love the sound of tiny minds cracking apart when they try to comprehend that they’re not top of the heap. They flail and thrash around like crazy. The necessary identity shift is just too much for some, poor creatures. Don’t they realise they have so much to gain?
    Ah! Found it:
    “The gesture of pointing outward carries with it that of pointing inward, to oneself, and vice versa, and hence there’s no safe place from which to voice criticism.”
    – Trinh T Minh-ha

    • More of a comment on the attitudes used to maintain status quo rather than indulge in something as threatening as a little existential humility.

    • I take ‘safe’ to mean unassailable. I still rant about everything and lately everything that has been triggering me, is gee what a surprise exactly what I need to overcome! Instead of saying “he / she / they ” I just replace with me/ my / I and there my lesson hahahahahahahaha

      • Was reading a Buddhist take on anger a couple of nights ago and why we lack tolerance for others… coming back to us and what we deflect, project or the vulnerable emotions anger is used to replace.
        I am now also trying to turn my thoughts around to seeing what it is I am angry at within myself.
        It hasn’t stopped me just yet. I have many real and imagined conflicts being waged (one sided) … but baby steps…

        • Your post resonates with me. I too, have been dealing with some nasty, festering anger against my neighbor, who is a major climber, control freaky, liberties taker, always 1-upping type. He’s not all bad, but he really twists my undies.

          Much work to do … sigh. And more salt to throw down.

  3. This may be off topic but took my daughter to see Moana last week. What a beautiful film!! Finally a strong amazing female role model for little girls with no love interests!

  4. Funnily enough I think my aha moment was re this aka being single n it actually being better than not…

  5. I wish I was Astro schooled enough to know which aspects/trines or whatever, the effects are that are happening in my chart at the moment regarding exactly wthis! Actually, it’s not just at the moment but has been something I have struggled/fought and rebelled against for quite some time. It seems that the more and more independent I become, financially, the more it causes great divisions between my husband and I. I think this book is a must for me

    • Because Retro Venus is happening to all of us in different area of our lives – depending on the Rising sign – I would suggest that if you feel like reading this book then you should. It would probably affect you anyway and there could be some area – money, love, social status – that you would recognize as more meaningful than others.


      If you don’t mind sharing your natal chart, lots of cosmically schooled peeps here will be happy to assist. xx

  6. There’s a strong undercurrent of ‘women power’ bubbling….from movies (The Hidden Figures), songs (Eye of the Tiger, by Katy Perry), books such as the one mentioned above. It’s been a long time coming and there’s so much more to create the geyser where it will spill forth as we contend with the ridiculous chaos. But with that said it’s been boiling at a slow roll for YEARS. Maybe those of us who have lived through the stupidity of the past are here to remind those of the younger generation of what didn’t work in our battles. Shall we move onto We Didn’t Start the Fire by Billy Joel?

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