Self Help Books That Don’t Suck: 2016

Filed in Inspiration

Paul Lavoie

A long time ago, in 2009, there was a post called Self-Help Books That Don’t Suck.  This is the 2016 version. The Mercury Retro in Capricorn (the bulk of it IS in Capricorn) is perfection for upping one’s intake of self-improvement lit.

Saturn in Sagittarius is also no slouch when it comes to holing up in one’s power lair to blast the neural synapses with some shit makes you go WOW every third paragraph.

Personally, i love Kindle as it speaks to my Mercury in Aries – being able to highlight bits you like and collect them in one mega-hits section of sagacity/wit. But also, being fully digital means no more having to fling your greasy-thumbed copy of The Psychos Who Love Me or whatever behind the sofa when someone comes around. Whatever you’re perusing is seriously private.

Scanning someone’s bookshelf to get an idea of who they are seems so analogue now it’s practically prehistoric. Not to mention the potential for dust, papyrus bugs and the sharp corners of a bookshelf emanating awkward Feng Shui.

So anyway, these are the current self-help tomes that i think are awesome. ALSO, seriously i just got this. It’s not just Retro Mercury in Capricorn (the sign of continual striving for greatness) and Saturn (ruler of Capricorn) in knowledge hungry Saggo.

It’s also Jupiter (ruler of Saggo) in data-loving Virgo…ruled by Mercury. Can you grok this? Until the 26th is radically amazing for infusing your mind with fresh info & inspiration.

Here are my contenders:

  • Choose Yourself Guide To Wealth – James Altrucher – For when you’re wanting to kick it up several dimensions at work or in biz, bust a rut and feel empowered in the new economy.
  • The 22 Day Revolution – Marco Borges – For when you’re wanting to try a plant based diet but want it with a defined time frame, with loads of info & rah-rah motivation from (yes) Beyonce’s personal chef.
  • Essentialism – Greg McKeown – For when you feel stuck in permanent Overwhelm mode. Or a minimalist wanting some more philosophical oomph to fuel your attitude.
  • The Naked Mind – Annie Grace – For when you’ve had it with alcohol and want to either give it up or cut way down but need some solid, up-to-the-moment thinking & facts around it. See also Saturn square Neptune lol.
  • The Big Leap – Gay Hendricks – For when you’re struggling with doubts, self-sabotaging emotions etc. More considered and therapeutic than Choose Yourself but also a rut-buster.
  • The Dreamer & The Fantasy Relationship – Natalie Lue – For when you’re trying to eradicate a Love Zombie pattern once and for all. If i had known this book existed when i was writing Love Zombies, i would not have written it. She is super-pertinent on the causes (yes) and underlying psychology of falling for unavailables or putting up with super shonky fauxmances.

Enjoy your Mercury Retro re-funk/mojo re-claim and share your thoughts/recommendations in the comments!

 

Image: Paul Lavoie

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ArielMM Member
Ariel

Wow, Natalie Lue is blowing my mind. For many years I did hardcore unrequited crushing / doomed relationships with unsuitables. But reading Natalie is making me realise I also have issues with commitment, even now I am in a good relationship, even if it has been challenged by becoming long-distance too quickly. Her whole website is like a short sharp injection of realism and motivation!

tridentfoxMM Member
tridentfox

Great post, almost through the Choose Yourself Guide and plan on a few others mentioned here. a healer I have been working on has just recently released her book The Movement (by Marine Selenee) – an intro to family constellations, an approach that looks at your family system patterns and resulting dysfunction. Loves hidden symmetry by Bert Hellinger also on my list.

Hedgepig
Hedgepig

Constructive Wallowing by Tina Gilbertson. Saved my life.

AKAPlutoMM Member
AKAPluto

I love Natalie Lue! I HIGHLY recommend her website “baggage reclaim” for those of us who see love and relationships as a long string of unfortunate events

InvictaMM Member
Invicta

Great list of books! So I just did my first Pilates class. I realised during yoga class last night that five years of just focusing on body building aka strength training, as in weights, as in, iron, as in “no pain no gain” has robbed my body of SO much flexibility. I used to be INSANELY flexible but also strong from a weird combo of kind of ballet meets Tai Chi meets the naffest looking untard EVER, this random book called Callenetics I stumbled upon when I was 17. Because of all the travelling and having to stay in swimwear… Read more »

ChrysalisMM Member
Chrysalis

I can highly recommend Pilates. I have done it for a year and it has changed my life, kind of without my noticing. I had zero body awareness when I started. She would say, ‘move so-and-so muscle or body part’ and I would be ‘what? What? Am I not moving it? I can’t feel anything’. It took me months to learn how to even recognise what stuff felt like then set about the rehab. You as a Virgo will love it because it requires focus, attention to detail and balance. I know what you mean about flexibility. Now I am… Read more »

Pi
Pi

Pilates (good Pilates) is the freakin business. I did it for about a year before I had to stop ($) . Felt as strong as a tree, and I looked hawwtt thank you v much. My Venus in Aries shoulders appreciated the extra tone and oomph provided by sexy posture 🙂

wilderchild
wilderchild

Is there a self-help book for Coping with Disappointment and Terror? My adopted second city, Koln, began this year in the grip of a nightmare.. 80 victims of assault, harassment and theft. Dozens of sex attack victims. The city central, and the beautiful Cathedral, are now no-go for Women. How? I’m so, so unbelievably angry. This city woke me up to life as a teenager, what it meant to be a free-moving European, and enjoy the incredible privilege of free movement, free thought, free revel and safe passage. In a month away, miles from home and wandering the streets of… Read more »

MutableMabel
MutableMabel

I read about this! My thoughts are with you and the women of Koln. I don’t know what you should do to feel strong again but I hope that you do, and that you know in your heart that this is something that shouldn’t happen to anyone regardless of what some might say.

AnkhRising8.0
AnkhRising8.0

Random thoughts, dear wilderchild: * There are lots of books/wisdom about recovering from trauma. I know you haven’t been directly victimized like the women in Koln, but in other ways you too are a victim (eg, you aren’t safe to go to the Cathedral, or women you love have been hurt). And like them, you have had no choice in the matter. There are matters of resiliency & reclaiming your power that are at stake now. Making peace with the injustices, moving beyond the damages. * Consider the Stages of Grief, a la Kubler-Ross. The freedom you’ve enjoyed, the relative… Read more »

silver
silver

I read about that too. Have been outraged, even though it is far away for me. I should know better than to get into politics, but Europe taking in that many young single men from Arabic countries is such a mistake in my opinion. Re people saying ‘that’s life’ I think that is really lame. It isn’t. It’s what people will and wont put up with. I have no idea what you should all do, but that Mayor needs to go. Mainstream news is ridiculous, they didn’t even report it for ages. A website/twitter/facebook page, etc would be good. People… Read more »

Pegasus
Pegasus

I believe it’s touted that it is on th brink of civil war.
Some one held a sign up saying ‘Thanks Angela’.
It’s also what happens when sexual energy is repressed, it turns into violence, erupts like a volcano.
Poor Europe’s in for a nasty ride in conjunction with
the stock market. Sex and Money 2 core emotional biggies to be sorted.

silver
silver

I dunno, I just read this article in the Telegraph http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/life/cologne-sex-attacks-something-terrible-took-place-here-but-its-a/ Looks like most women are accepting it and keeping their heads down. I’ve also read that the Merkel gvt has said that anyone saying anything negative about refugees on facebook etc will be prosecuted for ‘hate speech’. Something really weird is going on. This story is huge yet many women who normally want to talk about feminist issues are not saying a word. The twitter universe erupts because a scientist wears a cartoonish shirt (made by his female friend), and yet there is deafening silence when women are actually… Read more »

Lux Interior Is My Co-PilotMM Member
Lux Interior Is My Co-Pilot

I’d like to warn people off any book that has “French Women” in the title.

Drowning CapricornMM Member
Drowning Capricorn

Dear Mystic, et al,

As much as I love my Kindle, as a double Capricorn + Mercury in Aqua + Moon,Mars,Saturn in Scorpio —- I will never, ever abandon books. Spirits and ancestors, you know. I have re-prioritized, however. Whittled down a 1,000+ tomb library to a few hundred high quality, hardback classics.

Happy New Year to you and the MM tribe!

AnkhRising8.0
AnkhRising8.0

Thanks, Drowning Cap! Best wishes for 2016 to you 🙂

galadarlingMM Member
galadarling

My book comes out on February 9th! 😀

InvictaMM Member
Invicta

AMAZING!!!!
congratulations!!!!!!

PiMM Member
Pi

I also wanted to ask
I had this little thought as I was pestering the Oracle,
= Pluto, when power tripping you or if acting unconsciously within you, makes you think that X is the only option.

X being whatever variable you are caught up in/with/about. etc

PiMM Member
Pi

question being, does that sound about right?

Virgo EllieMM Member
Virgo Ellie

Yes, that is what I am thinking. I always think relationship. But if there is something other than a relationship that you are focused on it could that. For example, if all you can think about is getting hired by X there is where Oracle is saying “you think it’s your only option”

PiMM Member
Pi

god, this week is INTENSE!
the washing machine continues.
seriously as i (literally) walked between the washing basket and my desk, I experienced a complete mental & emotional 180 (one of about eight flip-flops today) re the distant love interest. wtf?! I know I need to develop some mental discipline of late but lawd.
horoscopes – re-reading constantly – are saving my LIFE ok maybe just reputation… hopefully.
engage sunny, ‘up’ brain vibes…
hit the to do list…
silence is golden….
eeexxxxhaaaaallleeeee

LiberatingVenusMM Member
LiberatingVenus

LOL – Oh, I’ve got a good (funny) one that’s right in line with Cap energy: “Fuq Feelings” Basically, it’s geared toward peeps who tend to get stuck wallowing in their emotions. I see it as a combination of an icy blast of cold (Aquarian) Air and Saturn-like pragmatism for those drowning in Water. It is also (obvy, by the title) laced with profanity to keep it a lighter, more amusing read. Here’s a link to an article about it for anyone who wants to see whether or not it is their cuppa tea: http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2015/09/fuck-feelings/403792/ I think my favorite takeaway… Read more »

PiMM Member
Pi

if there’s one thing i’ve learnt to do / appreciate, it’s the art of making the necessary adjustments and building in the margins-for-error that allow us to live imperfectly in the real world among other imperfect people. 🙂

skarabMM Member
skarab

Yeah – that!

Virgo EllieMM Member
Virgo Ellie

I love synchronicity…. I have been battling since pre-Christmas a heavy heart on my past and my drinking. Yes, I have posted this repeatedly on this page. So I am sorry. But it is very real right now and I just said to myself “Girl .. WHY can’t you stop drinking”. I was going to ask the Mystic counselors here where to go to figure this out and LOOK.. Mystic has the Self Help books posted that includes how to give up Alcohol… I am overwhelmed with gratitude. I also saw in tomorrows horoscopes about this Dark Moon stirring up… Read more »

Fiona
Fiona

Hope the book is helpful for you VE. I used to continually look at ‘working on myself’ to improve outcomes in whatever the issue of the moment was but I found it mostly activated my inner critic. Lately I’m learning to just do things I know are good for me, health, peace and joy. Its much easier and no need to wrestle with the ‘shoulds’. Go easy on yourself, the self esteem will follow.

Virgo EllieMM Member
Virgo Ellie

Thank you! xo!

annica
annica

Your mom probably disliked herself. Usually the only girl in a family of boys is treasured, by brothers and parents alike. How sad! 🙁 my mom hates herself and as a result hates womankind. She was not an alcoholic but she tried to drown me when i was a baby because she did not want to have a baby girl. She wanted a boy to replace the one she lost. My father was the one who saved me. When my mom had a girl the next time too she was so mad she cut out her female parts. On some… Read more »

Virgo EllieMM Member
Virgo Ellie

Oh sweet Annica, I am sorry! I gasped when I read your story! I feel sorry for my mom as well. No one should have to treat themselves like that. Your Mother as well. Awful. Again, I am sorry! Glad you posted. I find it very healthy being here and releasing a lot shite.

PiMM Member
Pi

wow, VE and Annica, i’m sorry to read these histories of family sadness, pain and identity chaos wrought by troubled family members…but I am so happy to read that you are or are becoming so clearly aware of this family history and pain. VE, you will get to better and better places as time passes with your self-learning.. XOX

Virgo EllieMM Member
Virgo Ellie

Thanks Pi! Been with Mystic and you guys for a couple of years now. Learning SO much about myself through MM and the posts made by you guys is a blessing!

xo!

Taurus VixenMM Member
Taurus Vixen

My heart goes out to you. Be easy and kind to yourself. Sounds like you are learning to be what I call a Mom to yourself.

Virgo EllieMM Member
Virgo Ellie

Wow… powerful.. “what I call a Mom to yourself”. Yes. Taking care of my little girl!

Thanks!

Virgo EllieMM Member
Virgo Ellie

You know Taurus Vixen, your comment was the best comment to help redirect my opinion of myself. I can’t believe it. I was driving in my car yesterday and thought about it and asked myself “how would you take care of your little girl”. And everything changed for me. I can apply that to everything I do with people that causes me insecurities.

xx!!

Taurus VixenMM Member
Taurus Vixen

Oh that warms my heart!!! So glad it clicked with you.

ChrysalisMM Member
Chrysalis

I love ‘The Unmistakeable Touch of Grace’ by Cheryl Richardson. I read it every year or so and I find something new every time.

Taurus VixenMM Member
Taurus Vixen

Ah you know about Natalie Lue! God, she is fantastic and for others that don’t know, check out her website baggagereclaim.com Several years ago I somehow in Internet land stumbled into it, started reading and got a very rude awakening that I indeed had been a Love Zombie with someone and letting my then husband be an arse. Quite the eye opener but wow did it help me change my ways. The other book I would add is “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing” by Marie Kondo. I have yet to find friend… Read more »

Fiona
Fiona

I was thinking of the same book! I had been working towards a life declutter over the past few years, but made quantum leaps after reading this book. I think I have arrived at Essentialism. Life changing truly!

Calendula
Calendula

Just discovered Natalie ‘ s website Baggage Reclaim a month ago. I was probably ready for it after being schooled in love zombie -ism by you, Mystic.
Her concept of the future faker was pertinent to me. This is when someone pretends to want a future with you to get their needs met in the present. Whether sex, money or an attentive ear. Then they disappear until ready for a qi infusion at some point down the road.
I look forward to reading some of the others on the list. Charging the tablet!

ChrysalisMM Member
Chrysalis

I looked at Baggage Reclaim yesterday following the links above and wow, what a resource. A few home truths there for me and reminders to get back to basics…being responsible for one’s own self/happiness instead of dumping it at the feet of someone else and saying, ‘Here. I want YOU do it.’
I think this could be my Saturn square Neptune mission.

MutableMabel
MutableMabel

I love that Natalie Lue book too. She really breaks it down, and not an ounce of sugar to make it go down easier.

It’s a really refreshing far cry from all the self help literature for singles that would have you believe that the universe hasn’t sent you what you want because you failed to be positive enough or something.

sphinxMM Member
sphinx

Love a good book list! Thanks for this Mystic.

VFSMM Member
VFS

Thanks Mystic. I’m not buying any books in 2016 so let’s hope the library gas these. You’re my hero ????

VFSMM Member
VFS

I used emoticons that became question marks. I know you’re my hero! X

cousinribby
cousinribby

Nice!
I just started “You’re not crazy – it’s your mother: understanding and healing for daughters of narcisistic mothers” but I read it for both parents. I feel like vomiting every other page when describes my parents exactly, and their scripts verbatim.. but spending a month together has really put the spotlight on our relationship. 10/10 Would recommend

scorpiodawnMM Member
scorpiodawn

oh my god was thinking of getting that this morning…keep chickening out but I will…

Virgo EllieMM Member
Virgo Ellie

Wow… that would be a good book for me too! Thanks!