Honesty In Dating Profiles: Aquarius

Filed in Astro Gaga, Aquarius

Steven Meisel

Aquarius:  Seeks devoted partner who won’t break my rhythm nor attempt to impose conventional expectations.

Loves: Humanity.

Hates:  Familiarity.  Crowds.  Vulgarity.  Common opinions.

The Last Book I Read Was: None of your fuqing business.  Why do you think Kindles have passcodes?

You Would Ideally:  Be not physically present too often but operate more like an asteroid of erratic orbit, always in within gravity pull but not predictable by anything other than software yet to be invented.

Would Consider: An Artificial Intelligence.

Perfect Date:  1803 – the discovery of palladium.

Diet: Complex. Your breaking trend is my “been there.”

Political Views:  Spectacular.

Occupation: Crepuscular.

 

Image: Steven Meisel

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Invicta
Invicta

This is funny and reminds me a lot of my current one. My slug line is STOP TELLING WOMEN TO SMILE and then i think (haven’t logged on in weeks) it says something like World weary, manorexic pseudo Buddhist and a bit of a rant about how lacking in diversity and imagination the multiple choice questions are. That the reason I ticked “I’d rather not say” on most boxes ISN’T because I’d rather not say, it’s because I’m not given the option. Also chick flick is a genre? Seriously? And I’m supposed to decide whether I like it or not..hmm… Read more »

R(Aqua/Tauri)
R(Aqua/Tauri)

lolllllll this is so great

Invicta
Invicta

“We were soon joined by two acquaintances of his, a foreign couple, maybe in their thirties. They talked about their philosophy of marriage as a convenient arrangement. They were evidently free spirits. I had no sympathy for their brand of low passion.” I’m so there. I realised lying in bed today (yes, write in bed and I love it. It’s cold and my desk feels way too formal, as does the chair, formal, restrictive and cold. I did better when I sat on a swiss ball and shouldn’t have listened to that “Feng Shui expert” A little bit of clutter… Read more »

sphinx
sphinx

This is wonderful! 😀
I see elements in many Aqua’s I know.

Still, the Aquarian I know best is in contra herself.
Crowds? she loves ’em.
Diet? don’t care, even if I have IBS.
Political views? No time for that.
Contrarian even unto herself.

sphinx
sphinx

How exciting!! Congrats Lightning Butterfly, all hale the Coming Iconoclast.

syrynx
syrynx

Aww, that’s so lovely. Blessings and good wishes for the birth. Another little ball of lightning about to make his entrance into the world : )

Ruth
Ruth

I have Aquarius Sun, Mars and Saturn all in the 12th house. At first I wanted to say Mystics low-down is just not true…but it is. All of it, however I’d just like to add that underneath, we are sensitive souls also. Or perhaps that’s just a 12th house thing.

vikingwoman
vikingwoman

When did dating sites started to take off in Internet land anyway? When Uranus was in Aquarius? Intimacy at a “safe” distance.

Scorpie
Scorpie

Neptune in Aqua! It changed everything

flowerchild
flowerchild

“Seeks devoted partner who won’t break my rhythm nor attempt to impose conventional expectations.” Ha, this feels right to me…..Aqua Sun, here! I do think I was dating an AI, the guy I go on about on here…..honestly, at times I thought he was a hybrid human/AI. He was a programmer, too…what is it about those guys? Something is different…..I think because they ‘talk’ to computers all day they become one. ‘Intel Inside’ instead of a heart…. Anyway… I enjoyed this post, as I’m thinking of firing up the online dating again. I did so much of it last year……learned… Read more »

R(Aqua/Tauri)
R(Aqua/Tauri)

LOL my mom (married to my dad, programmer) always say that programmers think “differently” and that it’s hard for her to understand his binary thinking or logic process on human things. She and the other wives of engineers would always have that conversation and bond over dealing with their robot husbands over wine at parties. ^__^ I am moving back to SF this week and dabbled in the online dating thing for like a week and a half around new years, I just could not handle it… everyone is polyamorous and that lifestyle just isn’t for me. It just seems… Read more »

flowerchild
flowerchild

Ah! All sounds par for the course, unfortunately. The fact that so many of us are having the same experience with online dating says something is up with it…. And what you’ve written, which is similar to what I’ve experienced, is the sort of unique insanity of the Bay Area style of online dating. Feels hopeless, doesn’t it? Someone told me that you find more ‘avoidant attachment types’ (from psychology’s ‘Attachment Theory’) in online dating, which makes sense, and I bet in the polyamory world, it’s even more chock full of avoidant attachment types. I thought it was just my… Read more »

Lux Interior Is My Co-Pilot
Lux Interior Is My Co-Pilot

This is so apt and applies perfectly to all the aquas I know 🙂

Though some of them heavily pooh pooh astro……

sphinx
sphinx

Nearly all the ones I know do! The Aqua’s that don’t are believers. No middle ground!

davidl
davidl

Thanks Mystic for your Aqua example above. Just confirms what I have learned from a lifetime of relationships with women. That is that 90% have little or no idea of what would actually make them happy. They wouldn’t recognize their best mate if they fell over them and tend to have a list of attributes that they look for to fulfil fantasies before realities. It’s all self defeating confusion that leads to many women never being at peace, never feeling settled. In many it leads to a kind of unconscious hatred of men, a sadness that I see in many… Read more »

cosmic fleece
cosmic fleece

Kismet !
&
What a stunning moment David. xo

Pi
Pi

!
self awareness is king.

I took that Aqua list to be written by a male, actually, lol. I didn’t connect that image at all.
Maybe that’s my mars speaking 😉

Damons
Damons

davidl, That is so rad what you observed, and big kudos for being brave enough to share that experience with strange/r MM blog cohorts. As for your observation on women and relationship check list – there’s some real issues with the female zeitgeist on men. I have this theory, but I’d need a year to research it properly and write a solid thesis. It’s not reserved to middle aged women, either. I had to tell the apple of my eye (Sarah 27) what she wanted in life, because she didn’t quite know. “I don’t know what I want?” Sarah snarked.… Read more »

sphinx
sphinx

I concur with this view, sadly, having been one of those people. But the need for control stems from fear. A complete lack of belief that anyone could understand you, as so far no one has really tried. As usual, love is very healing, but even that can be misunderstood…

Scorpio_Rising
Scorpio_Rising

I’d never want to go on a dating site- far too impersonal for me.

Year of the Phoenix
Year of the Phoenix

Aahhh dating sites.

It starts out weird and just gets weirder

skarab
skarab

They sound fuqing freaky. Just reading this blog has weirded me out.

Year of the Phoenix
Year of the Phoenix

How I met my MAD CAP ex – nough said Skarab

I have been dipping my toes into the Meet Up stream and like the kind of men I’ve been meeting there, and the whole set up seems more friendly and less fraught

syrynx
syrynx

Ditto.

syrynx
syrynx

Oh whoops, I meant ditto on the being weirded out. Klutz me.

milleunanotte
milleunanotte

Read it; thought oh not exactly, though i’m Venus in Aquarius, trine Uranus in Libra (Mutual Reception). Read it again and well, YES. Especially the (YAWN) breaking trend diets. Like, don’t you (a) know enough basic human biology; and (b) actually have an idea that you test on yourself from that knowledge, before anyone else suggests it for you? Except for Perfect Date: i am lots of Mutable so i don’t know what Perfect is until i’ve tried it (can the notion usually be surpassed?) And not certain i would limit myself to an occupation, nor to someone who thinks… Read more »

milleunanotte
milleunanotte

Mind you, it’s not the kind of profile i would respond to. Wouldn’t think i was interesting enough 🙂

Pi
Pi

oh yes you are (interesting enough!) x

I’d respond – if only to challenge their idea of a good date with a different date… what can i say, i am argumentative 😉

milleunanotte
milleunanotte

That Venus in Aries, huh? 😉

Thank you, lovely xx

How have your days been?

Pi
Pi

🙂 yep the venus in aries welcomes an even-handed stoush 😉 push-up competitions, grudge match pool game, who can yell the loudest into an abyss, race to the fridge, arm wrestling <3, best date based on the discovery of the elements, etc hahahaha oh god this all makes me happy just thinking about it … LOL! thanks for the vibe boost 😀 Days – epic rollercoaster yesterday was hell, the cap lingers and the heartache is insane but I decided not to "forget" him, this is ridiculous He is worth having in my life and i see future possibilities of… Read more »

Pi
Pi

ftr:
what i am appreciating about this man’s presence in my psyche is the intense amount of self-development that is taking place as a result. And engaging “maximum non-attachment” as a way to appreciate him as a human being and what this is bringing to my existence, and not as a thing who must subject himself to my fears or desires (as much as I would like the desire part…maybe later on.. hehe)

Milleunanotte
Milleunanotte

Yes the heart doesn’t respond to mental decisions. As long as u use Saturn, and I kno u will in how u behave and motivate, then u can soulmine this fwiw xxx

Pi
Pi

pisces power! oh hang on. saturn power! lol x

uranianoddity
uranianoddity

Aqua moon and Lilith conjunct Uranus and I can confirm this is 100% true

Damons
Damons

I can experience a deep as one-on-one then go away for 12 months – with no further contact between said potential – decide I like her, then drop-in out of the blue and they’re like, WTF? I’m engaged ‘n shit. Recent Anecdote: There’s a girl I like stacks – Sarah – she’s real because we met one day at the beach an’ just talked. I posted an ad online looking for a possible flatmate; Sarah responded, instigating some face-time. It was perfect sunny morning in early spring- I asked her to take her sunnies off so I could scan her… Read more »

milleunanotte
milleunanotte

Peronally, as a Jupiter in Sag i ADORE and NEED dinner; and as a 12th and 5th houser do also adore movies; but the idea of both together is quite boxy. I tend to derail those plans without meaning to. So, anyway, no date here but i did super enjoy your descriptions 🙂 Especially of the faux buddhist single ladies. Not living there now but did for many years. Don’t you dare cave! You’ll hate the shit out of it! You know, a person can be a living dating-site version of a person because they have no other self.

Pi
Pi

non-inked surfer on the sunny coast? a rare species indeed 😛

annica
annica

Hahhah! So funny. I resemble your remark about the wrong side of middle aged yoga loving tree hugging late 80’s euro shit box driving faux buddhist single ladies that haven’t had a date in a decade. Except that i was only raised an actual buddhist…..

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

Oh how funny and miserable, I could have been one of those people described except I’d say not b/c I was raised in part as an actual budhist too (one parent is budhist, but now in denial), tree hugging – is that supposed to mean spiritual, ecological? No pretensions on cars, married and not dating, but think its hysterical there’s a ready stereotype… Whats the right side of middle age? My husband is younger than me, in mid mid forties, but I always fell for people much older than me! I do have venus in capricorn, and saturn cusp the… Read more »

annica
annica

I just find it hilarious as OP says they are 44. Are they not middle aged themselves as 44 is half of 88 y.o. Which is more than avg life expectancy? I’m so curious.

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

It is ironic I agree. I am ageless in some ways – to my detriment, and older in others I wish I was not. We could all be more pleased with the youthfulness inside ourselves.

I have jupiter on my ascendant 12th, opposite retrograde mercury…shocking, like technicolour misty lenses permanently present lol…fantasy better than reality, dreams, visions a huge part of my existence…

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

That sounds like emotional torture; I have little idea how anyone would solve your predicament! I wouldn’t be drawn into anything other than what was deserving of me or the person you dream of, so be resolute! Try not to dither or mope, keep busy, moving!

Oh and why do you need to scan a retina? My naturopath did this for health reasons but when I fell in love it was involuntary, the other person just looked into me, that was it!

Scorpie
Scorpie

“Looked into me”

Wow.. it’s like that isn’t it “INTO” and THROUGH”

Only ever happened to me once in my life with someone I loved dearly.

Would love to have that feeling again

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

INTO & THROUGH – Yes!!! Please tell me…

1. Did you run for your life?
2. Did you feel “safe”

So I was afraid, as obviously this does not happen everyday, ran, cut him off and regret it. See mystic’s post on aquarian dating / honestly lol. He absolutely knows (all anyway). He is very clever, intense…so careful, polite, and barely controlled. I am sorry.

It was mutual, a collision; yes universe on the other side explains all, thank you.

Scorpie
Scorpie

run? Are you kidding. No way! I’m a Scorp with a packed 8th house and although my Uranus sq moon in Sagg tends to run for the hills I didn’t want to with him. We were already in a relationship. It was beautiful and yes, i felt completely safe. 🙂 Only time i ever have. I trusted him from day one and as a Scorp I don’t give that away or my heart that easily. He was a Virgo (catnip for my Mars in Virgo) moon in Aqua and Aqua rising. Super smart, handsome, gorgeous blue eyes, funny, interesting. A… Read more »

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

Oh wow, your so brave! What a lovely thing you realised this. Of course, scorpio!!! My God I’d love to have courage to reciprocate. It was poor timing, even though I was fairly ill, unhappy I didnt think I should break my marriage. I know this man is very real, but it so unnerving – that a person can know all of you, with so little need for words, there’s no hiding, no space or corner for cover, but I am freer because of knowing him, but the pain – for both of us…of course he’s just wonderful…honest, direct, free… Read more »

Scorpie
Scorpie

oh no, not worth breaking up your marriage over it.

Just appreciate the moment I guess.
Intensity never lasts.

Whats that saying? some people are with us for a short time and others a long time….

Scorpie
Scorpie

anyway, I wasn’t brave or courageous. It was pure and real and honest and it just happened. There was no time to think how to act. Just be.

If you felt unnerved maybe its because you have a partner already and it wasn’t meant to be

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

Yes, I was unnerved, miserable yes, with a partner, strangely partner is kinder to me than ever before, so I agree, better to be decent, clean with it all.

Kimmy
Kimmy

I have moon in Aqua and every word is true! <3

I love this so much!

Invicta
Invicta

My progressed ascendant is Aqua and progressed Sun, Scorpio. I’m like “yep totally. Kindles have passwords for a reason.”

kateorsini
kateorsini

please let this be a continuing series

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

Yes, lol, I reckon so!

libralady
libralady

I’m aqua rising and this is describes me to a t

libralady
libralady

take out ‘is’

gearbox
gearbox

Me…8th house Aquarian/ scorpio moon.
I agree with most of that list.

Not sure about the “love of humanity” call. I do love acts of humanity but humanity in general are a disappointing bunch.

Politically positioned about dead centre.Religious extremism and political extremism to the left or right is what’s wrong with the world IMO.
Extremism should be confined to art , entertainment and recreation.

GeminEE
GeminEE

Please do the rest of the signs!

Pax
Pax

Welp….

Not wrong! LOL

Suddenly Leo
Suddenly Leo

Oh, man- u nailed it. Those Aquas. . . .

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

I’m an aquarian – I always end up surrendering to the leo infused, and the scorpio influenced folk…

supakali
supakali

I’m a scorp who love Leos, Aquas and Toros, must be the fixed vibe 🙂

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

I had an epiphany about this – venus in is 5th (house of leo!) and north node / saturn 8th (hoise of scorpio), it makes sense!

supakali
supakali

interesting! I have a 5h Venus as well, which might explain it some…although I can’t figure out the Aqua thing. I think it’s just I feel calm with those people – like we’re on an energetic wavelength

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

lol, I read in an astrology book 5th house venus is all charm…magnanimous, etc…

What is your 11th house? Do you have any aqua planets?

I am so very uranian…too much so. But the earth venus is practical…

supakali
supakali

nope, nothing in aqua or in the 11th house unless you look at the Solar chart and then Pluto and the SN are conjunct there. BUT – OK!!!! penny drop! I have Uranus conjunct Venus 🙂 d’oh!

Far out, it’s funny how you stare at a chart dat in day out and then only just realise things that have been there for years – eg. when I was looking to answer your question I realised I have Uranus transiting the 11H squaring Pluto in the 8H, both at home.

and definitely magnanimous and charming, how about you? lol 😉

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

Oh I have been accused of being a lounge lizard, yes I suppose I’m guilty as charged :-))

Aqua-cap-Gemini
Aqua-cap-Gemini

This is totally me.
lol
*how did you know*

Scorpie
Scorpie

Genius!!!!! LOL

Pi
Pi

I love this mystic 🙂
Appeals to my aqua mars 🙂

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

Hey Pi I responded to your dream interpretation query on other post…maybe its too late, you didn’t see, no problem…:-))

Pi
Pi

hey thanks ASR – i may not have gone back so I will now have a look xxx

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

Yep, your dreams are actually a road map in disguise…so good thing you actually are addressing it. Although, lol, I must admit I am bewildered with mine…

Jokerman
Jokerman

Thats funny as all get out! Honsety on dating sites? Rare as rocking horse teeth. Latest battle has convinced me to get off them. I am now where there is lotza ppl. Cap woman agreed to a date after talkn to her. Then she put it off. Then she agreed to a revised date after agreeing to her request for a few says no contact; l gave her 6 instead of 3/4; as per CancerScopes. Then she had existential realisation. “Nothing to do with you” (bovine excrement). But l noticed she had been active on the site. I then contacted… Read more »

Pi
Pi

Dude, chill out. She didn’t owe you anything if she didn’t feel like it. Its not cool to get worked up with dating site dynamics.

Jokerman
Jokerman

Yeah. But do not words have specific and semantic meanings? I think thats why they are used that way. Otherwise language becomes meaningless.

Taurean Love Expert
Taurean Love Expert

Well, clearly the two of you have different views on semantics, so would not enjoy your date, anyway. People flake out, that’s life. It’s tough to feel like someone is playing games with you, but women are socialised into being indirect with men (for reasons outlines in Louis CK’s excellent video on dating… worth a Google) And what Pi said…

Jokerman
Jokerman

You are right ppl do flake out but she lied. A difference. I answered Pi’s by saying her (Cap) was, at best, indistinct and, at worst misrepresentative of what she intended. Her words were not her actions. Simple.

Yes l understand some men , and some women, play shit games. Not all women and not all men.

Jokerman
Jokerman

Also the yes, no, yes, no, yes is so fuqn confusing. If she says yes you believe what she says but in her mind, later, changes without telling you. BATSHIT CRAZY.

That is some fuqd up shit for sure.

DaturaSquire
DaturaSquire

Dude you are absolutely terrifying to me just quietly. Absolutely terrifying, aggressive, entitled. I’m not saying that to be harsh, honestly. Sort it out. You will get NOWHERE with this attitude. If I were this woman and I thought you knew even vaguely where I lived I would get six rottweilers and then also move to Greenland. Its kind of important for you to understand this. Women changing their minds is a thing that happens, she owed you nothing. If its not happening its not happening, nothing more. FYI nothing is hotter than a guy who isn’t angry and demanding.

Jokerman
Jokerman

Your comment is made without question. I see no value in your statement bcos you lack inquiry.

saturnsayshi
saturnsayshi

Um, more like Cancer guys finish BITTER. do you know how assaulted with messages women are on dating sites? Even after having a couple nice chats with a guy, the sheer daily influx of messages that women get from men is staggering and buries the nice communiques until they fade from memory. Even after a nice chat, it’s usually easier to ghost rather than take the time to analyze and thoughtfully write out why there doesn’t seem to be enough chemistry. If I did that for every guy I talked to online, I wouldn’t have time to take care of… Read more »

LL
LL

Brilliant reply! Absolutely nailed it.

Here’s a great read for all those guys on dating sites going off at women not giving them a chance…

http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person/

annica
annica

What a great article! Very funny indeed. I read it just in case there were tips that applied to women. Nope.

bull with sting in tail
bull with sting in tail

Ummm.

DaturaSquire
DaturaSquire

that is amazing! <3

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

***My god I can’t even get through the car park without exchanging erotic eye contact, smiles or curious glances to the other (usually much older) sex, my feet feel like they are often being dragged by a current – good thing I’m not dating or on a website! I’m safe because my child is pulling me away!

aqua sun conjunct vesta
Mars chiron pisces 7th, opposite uranus / pluto, trine scorpio neptune 3rd, capricorn venus (conunct transiitng pluto /mercury)

Jokerman
Jokerman

No, l don’t feel bitter. I know bcos l know how l feel about it. I am disappointed when someone lies to you. I am sure most readers would concur. It was finished this morning. She said she did not want to date anyone. At all. Yet when l deleted my profile, as l said l would, in an earlier post. l saw a prompt as to who was online. Yep, it was her, she who said she had so much “existential crisis” (verbatim), in her life, that she did not want any men in her life. Yet there she… Read more »

saturnsayshi
saturnsayshi

you realize she could have been searching for women online instead? 😉 just sayin’…

Jokerman
Jokerman

No she was looking for a man. I posted so many times on this that l forgot to say it everytime. But rest assured she was looking for a man. I just dont get why “existential crisis” was a shit for me. She ran hot n cold.

saturnsayshi
saturnsayshi

Rest assured? Hmmm…. I’m primarily straight but I’ve changed my online profile back and forth between looking for men exclusively and looking for both men AND women. Unless someone was legit stalking my online activity and refreshing my profile page, they wouldn’t have noticed a few minutes where my “Looking for” changed…

In any case, maybe she found someone she liked talking to who was more curious than mad about her existential crisis. Who knows? 🙂

Jokerman
Jokerman

I wasn’t mad about her crisis. Dont jump to that delusion. I asked once about it and she said she did not want to talk about it. You will be happy to know that l respected that wish. Maybe you coulda asked about what l did in regards to that rather than assert what l might have, or not might have done. I dont think you are being fair with that assertation.

Jokerman
Jokerman

On the point of orientation its always good to let the ppl you are dialogue know when something may have changed. After all the other party is not privy to the other persons position (on whatever tbat maybe)

The Venus Fly
The Venus Fly

Sorry to say but this is why I stay clear of online dating ESP. in Australia. Too many “nice guys” here are anything but. The profiles have zero depth and the conversations are one-sided. If I type in interests, movies etc nothng turns up in Australia but thousand’s in the States. There are low vibration guys everywhere but the antagonism evident in your post is out of whack for someone with zero relationship with someone. You have NO idea how many men feel entitled to woman – but your post reeks of it. No snark, but I think you need… Read more »

The Venus Fly
The Venus Fly

P.S. She said looking for men – not you. Options – these sites are to vet out and you were vetted. Clinging to the “looking for men” exposes low and obstinant vibes. The need to be justified in meanness – bad vibe for potential relationships, dude…

Jokerman
Jokerman

No there is no bitterness but thank you for speaking for me even tho you dont know me. I didnt feel “entitled” (as in “reeks of it”), as you put it, but was rather going on what sbe had indicated.

But l think it would be a little more objective if you asked rather than convert what happend between us to her perspective.

Why is her duplicity put onto me?

kateorsini
kateorsini

did you say. skirt.

good lord.

Jokerman
Jokerman

And women have their terms for men and their attractiveness or otherwise. Fuq, l was being honest in that some women are attractive to me physically.

kateorsini
kateorsini

keep talkin’, man.

Jokerman
Jokerman

You wanna know more? My point is clear

kateorsini
kateorsini

AIN’T GOT TIME FOR THAT.

pay me lol

Jokerman
Jokerman

Nor have you time for objectivity…

Jokerman
Jokerman

But nice to see you posting. I have that to my credit….unless of course you are posting under another handle.

kateorsini
kateorsini

just cuz she’s hungry doesn’t mean she wants to eat out of the trash

Jokerman
Jokerman

That is bullshit. You dont know me.

As l said before why is her misrepresenting the truth something that l should cop shit for over your’s and other ppl’s erroneous and misgiven understanding.

You are effectively calling me trash without knowing what went on or even asking me anything about was said.

kateorsini
kateorsini

I’m p confident in my assessment lol

Jokerman
Jokerman

Your ignorance is astounding

Jokerman
Jokerman

I would suggest you all read where she changed her mind back and forth and used words to indicate the changing tide; sometimes days after the thought shift.
I would like to show you my mobile phone text chain.

I have seen women on here make analogous complaints and there is no controversy. Just sayn

ramzilla scorpin'
ramzilla scorpin'

I have a hard time processing the amount of hate this kataka is getting. Granted, I haven’t hung out on dating sides (my scorp rising pales + balks at the very idea of revealing shit online for the sole purpose of dating – I’d much rather just go outside and look someone in the eyes)… but I BET if it had been a woman geting the yes-no-yes everyone would be outraged about the guy’s lies. But suddenly it’s ok because it’s a man? In my experience with Kataka men they are just a very emotional sort (sorry for the generalisation)… Read more »

Jokerman
Jokerman

Thanks. I appreciate your balanced take.

vikingwoman
vikingwoman

I am glad PD is now in a more populated place where he can meet and talk to people face to face. It’s healthier all around. I read his comment as someone who agreed to a date and had it set up, then cancelled, then set up another, then backed out again. That is misleading and very confusing to anyone who thought they had a date agreement. I don’t blame PF for feeling frustrated. PF you dodged a bullet. You escaped wasting your time with someone not adult enough to say “no” to begin with, nor “no thank you I… Read more »

Jokerman
Jokerman

Thanx, l couldn’t have expressed it better.

skarab
skarab

Yes – to everything you say Vikingwoman. I was just responding along the same lines – but you’ve said it all far better than i could have.

And PF – don’t let the turkeys keep you down.

catfish moon
catfish moon

Agreed.

The Venus Fly
The Venus Fly

Like they say in Oz “Yeah…no.” FACT – they never went on a date. FYI A guy I liked, who I knew IN PERSON, who flirted intensely back, said he’d call during during this past summer break. He never called. Did I stalk his internet? Did I send him messages “calling him on his BS?” Nope. I accept folks can have a change of heart – or be talkers, lol. Was I disappointed? Sure. But will I emotionally or verbally abuse the person because I didn’t get what I want? Nope. I think making excuses for toxic shit is counter-productive… Read more »

annica
annica

This is probably not going to make you feel better, but this happens to women too. You don’t hear about it much because women don’t complain as much about this aspect. Also what can be done? Follow the guy around some more and keep trying to initiate contact and be called a stalker? Nope. I myself went out one time with an Aries who kept doing the yes-no thing to me too. It is just how people are today. Internet dating always makes you feel like you have more choices than you actually do. The advice I got from the… Read more »

Jokerman
Jokerman

No. Nothing you said made me feel bad. I was able to move on the moment she was clear. It was the end of the matter as far ascl am concerned. Over the past 2/3 years l have learned a lot. But what l will not unlearn is what words mean. Otherwise language is a useless tool. She shoulda been upfront. Despite what readers, upost, think, she lied.

Your comments have been welcome. Why? Bcos you are objective. You have not played the person. (It use to be ‘man’ )

supakali
supakali

language is a social construct and thus language is not fixed, language is a living, changing thing, but again, I don;t think you’re hooked on language use but behavioural conventions, and that = expectation. expectation ain’t your friend.

annica
annica

This is right on. No, one is denying the chick lied. White lies are currently considered ok to do in this society under certain circumstances like internet dating. Sucks but it is true. How many people would tell their boss his/her haircut sucked if it did? Not many if the boss is a vain curmudgeon. If everyone told the 100% truth all the time, it could get awkward.

supakali
supakali

Maybe she has a Gemini Moon? dude, you want help or you want to stay stuck where you are? How’s that workin out for ya? You’ve got wise women here offering you insights and you’re throwing up defences. I thought you were open to learning form rejection. You want to shift? This is an opportunity, but you have to be willing. I’m going to offer you my 2c and then my duty as a good Scorp is to order you into therapy or healing STAT. You sound more undateable with every reply. Granted I don’t have access to the whole… Read more »

Jokerman
Jokerman

(I wont count the first 3 lines as a paragraph – for answering purposes.) Thanks for your objectivity; it is refreshing. I am not stuck. This was finished yday morn (about this time). So the post title was serendipitously fresh in my mind. I learnt a lot these past 2/3 yrs, much on this site, & have put a lot into practice. I am now not a LZ. But this episode only had its denoument 24hrs ago. This post would not have gone as long as it had if ppl realised, fully, that she was all over the shop. Par… Read more »

Scorpio_Rising
Scorpio_Rising

She may even be an employee not even a real woman available to date.

Jokerman
Jokerman

Wow. I knew it went on in less reputable sites. Maybe it goes on in more upmarket ones too. Hmmmm

baristagem
baristagem

Don’t be dragging Gemini Moons into this supakali!

😀

supakali
supakali

lol, sorry BGem! nothing personal 😀

MutableMabel
MutableMabel

Just pretend it’s all some mildly amusing video game until you get a real bite i.e. several dates in the real world and an actual mutually settled-upon connection. People are on those sites for all kinds of reasons, some of which change from day to day, and they don’t owe it to random pictures on a screen to be consistent.

Jokerman
Jokerman

On balance, l think your comments are merited and constructive. Thank you.

aquasunrise
aquasunrise

Hey I was just going to say if a person who is evolving with lightening speed, like across all time, and everywhere and nowhere – truly tapped into the source then everything can appear fairly unpredictable to the outside audience… I’m not backing duplicity or unreliability (I have been definitely deemed detached, peverse, rebellious)…but as someone with uranus (conjunct pluto) opposite mars & chiron, with uranus square the moon, and uranus quincunx sun conjunct vesta in aquarius…my mind thinks constant change and challenge is mostly an opportunity to grow…so if you feel thrown off guard or tested maybe see it… Read more »

capala
capala

wow, think there was quite a bit of projection being let loose above. right from the start i agree with you. language has it’s meaning and if you aren’t interested say no. why use euphemism on a site where you haven’t met the person. sounds to me like she was annoying and messing you around and you weren’t stalking her and you were annoyed. and the same thing happens to women on dating sites and you know this and the conclusion is that dating sites are just these weird places that many reasonable people give up on.

Jokerman
Jokerman

I think my Saturn, in Cap, exact trine Pluto (Virgo, of course) makes me a very “what ya say is what ya do” person. Saturn is also trine my Mars & Venus (obv cjunct Pluto). Plus l am Sun in 1H. Coupled means: for fuq sake, just say what you mean. One interp of Saturn trine Pluto said your views will attract opposition bcos you are not prepared to accept the superficial. I remember a campaign years ago where “No meant No!”. I liked that campaign; it appealed to my serious nature. Maybe ppl could get back to that. Language,… Read more »

supakali
supakali

interestingly I was just thinking the other day that that campaign was flawed in that it seems to disallow that there are other ways to indicate non-consent, and they should be accepted just as unproblematically.

Jokerman
Jokerman

I got no problem with other ways as long as there is no ambiguity.
When things are clarion, in nature / intent then respect can flourish.
It takes two to communicate….or not communicate whatever relationship maybe evolving.

I know that the objective thinkers on here know and respect my position.

Mystic Medusa
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