My Moon is in Libra and i have Neptune (the original “strange, invisible” planet) in trine to Venus. In Pisces and the 2nd house, So i have always been mad for scent. Once upon a time i adored the classic French fragrances – the old juices stunk of real jasmine, rose, green things. Chanel was always synthetic, i believe, but so brilliantly composed. Then accountants redesigned the formula so they were more cost-effective and maybe (?) safer, not so magic.
Then I read Slow Death By Rubber Duck – How The Toxic Chemistry Of Everyday Life Affects Our Health and freaked the fuq out. Slumped on my carcinogenic couch, my face moisturized with poison, i got to read how my favorite scents were not enveloping me in a protective aura of elegance but rather more like a fug of petro-chemical pure evil d.n.a. and hormone disrupting fuquery,
Obviously i was not impressed but you can’t be a perfume nut from puberty and suddenly switch to smelling of jojoba oil and lemon myrtle soap. Or worse – when i tried some of the natural fragrances available, no names – like an “insipid old hippie.”
So i first read about Strange Invisible Perfumes a few years ago, gathered that they are entirely ethno-botanical ingredients and yet classically formulated with proper composition values (this is important) AND that the company is run by Alexandra Balahoutis, a Virgo nose and astrology obsessive, who describes herself as being “happily tormented by perfection.” She sounds like a P.I.A.B. for sure.
I have been stalking them ever since and recently they agreed to (a) let me review their epic new range of zodiac scents and (b) give some away to you for prizes.
So, as part of a series, here is a my review of their Scorpio scent AND the person who can muster up the most Scorpionic credentials in the comments below will win one for themselves.
You can be a Scorpio, pretend to be one to win (this will appeal to Geminis, no?) and/or pay out on the Scorps in your life. I don’t care. I am looking for wit and/or pure, raw Scorpness.
So i spritzed myself with Scorpio for a day and these are my notes, transcribed directly from my phone.
* Smells a bit like the original Y.S.L. version of Opium – when it was amazing – if it was redesigned by someone with an Ancient Egyptian fetish. It’s like something Hatshepsut would have worn. Or omg, the idea behind the very Leo Opium but cleaned up by a Virgo.
* Cats and gay ladies definitely both like me more in this fragrance. Super-chic Venus-Pluto-in-Scorpio boxing teacher at gym insisted on writing down name of it after saying “what’s that?!” several times. Cats followed me, meowing melodically.
* Official fragrance notes are frankincense and cinnamon with some vetiver – would not be surprised if it secretly contained mugwort or catnip as it vibes a bit magic BUT real essential oils ARE magic. That is the whole point of them. Nicholas Culpeper, the famous Libra herbalist and astrologer said that every plant, every flower had its own spirit.
* Cinnamon is an aphrodisiac and (another ingredient) Palo Santo is a euphoric.
* This is the scent that Lestat (the rock star vampire from Interview With A Vampire) would wear, for sure.
* It made me turned onto my Scorpio aspects:
– I kept seeing 8s everywhere, like the 8th House?
– I grimly noted the hiring of Kendall Jenner by Estee Lauder as spokesmodel as the end of that era, goodbye gigantic cosmetic empires and hello niche.
– I created a schizz list – specifically New Age Bogans and sceptic Muggles who have just discovered Richard Dawkins.
– I had to get big, black sunglasses – it felt compulsive but necessary. I could not bear anything flimsy around my eyes – windows to the soul. They needed architecture and a barrier. They had to cover the Third Eye.
– i reflected upon the power of being enigmatic and vowed to apply just such a policy. Like a science experiment, i would note the findings and apply double blinds, placebo enigmas, the whole damned deal.
Basically the Scorpio scent from Strange Invisible (1) smelled excellent in a way that is like Opium beofre they fuqed it up or the old Robert Piguet Bandit designed by the legendary Germaine Cellier but (2) did not/could not poison me as entirely natural and (3) enhanced my Scorpionic attributes.
If you would like to win a bottle of this epic perfume, go for it and Scorp out in the comments!
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