I just wanted to say a big thank you. While the benefits of your ‘scopes and blogs have always been great, I’ve never had something so simple yet bang-on as this happen before. Your horoscopes saved my arse.
There is a promotion at work that I am very keen on getting. I had talked to my supervisors about it, asked all the right questions, started dressing the part and expressed interest. Lah-dee-dah, plenty of time to swan around…probably at least 3 weeks before I have to submit the application, as is normally the case in my workplace.
Then on Sunday, I was reading the daily ‘scopes. I see a massive image that says ‘GET SHIT DONE’ on the page. Then I read Virgo:
Being super-organized and on it is your advance defense mechanism against any crap from Mercury Retro – count it as on from now until July, you get the extended play version as Mercury is guide planet AND this schizz affects your Brilliant Career sector. Efficiency & transparency becomes your martial art.
Brilliant Career Sector? Organised? Maybe I should get started on that job application I think. I open it up and discover to my horror that the deadline is 9AM Monday! Crazy, I have never seen such a short deadline in my entire time in this office. Thanks for the Mercury Retrograde warning! Furiously I write one up and send it off. If it hadn’t been for your predictions jolting me out of my complacency I would have missed this opportunity.
Whether I get the job or not, I at least made the deadline. I would have been truly devastated if I’d missed it. Astrology really is like insider trading. Especially when it comes to Merc Rets. It gives you an edge.
The Upwardly Mobile Virgo
Dear Upwardly Mobile Virgo,
This is so cool to hear and yes i completely agree re the edge astrology gives. Insider trading is, however, illegal. And astrology, thankfully, is not.
As some of you know from my About page, I began studying astrology in a pretty O.C.D. fashion the moment i heard about it. I was a child, it was pre-internet and i would catch a series of insane buses over the city to get to different libraries and trawl their “occult” sections. As i was not allowed to just join and borrow from these places, i had to spend hours there, taking copious notes and being booted out by the librarians when it closed.
Next was the discovery of musty old “metaphysical bookstores”, complete with their ancient Kabbalah studying, usually older male Crowley devotees. An education indeed.
HOWEVER it was not till my first actual astrological consult, when i was about 19, that i totally got the EDGE. The insider trading. I’d been having Pluto on my Moon and my own astrological studies had not really gotten to the point where i understood that. The astrologer NAILED where i had been at – psych tumult, gynae hell, trip to the underworld and all. Pluto-Moon transits when you are a teenager are particularly challenging and she just GOT it.
It was so empowering to have that information. So you know, with tedious regularity, i am confronted by “skeptics” who apparently unaware that “skepticism is the chastity of the intellect” crap on as if (AS IF?!) astrology is some kind of fluff-brained diversion from the “real world.”
And i am like “yeah right, whatever” because it is actually a major Qi Fuq to deal with people like this, especially if they are going to trot out people like the Pope or economists as emblems of rational goodness. I mean hello who is high here? Astrology is edge, cosmic currency, insider trading, sat-nav for the Zeitgeist.
Good luck with the new gig!
Image: Hel-Gi – Strangeness & Charm
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