The Dangers Of The Aquarius

Film Poster The Dangers Of The Aquarius. An Aquarius man in a suit with a globe of the world.

The Aquarius is not, of course, dangerous. It’s an ironic propaganda film. Which Sun Sign would you choose to make an allegorical film about?

Dear Mystic,

I have been addicted to your horoscopes for two years now, thank you, merci.

I am a professional Gemini (Aka. A writer, not a fighter) and casual Leo-rising (Spotlight hogger). Recently I made a film for Tropfest called, “The Dangers of the Aquarius” (That didn’t make the finals, ouch my Leo pride) and I released it online last night after all the Tropfest controversy.

It seemed fitting since It’s a fake 1950’s Propaganda film that warns the public of the dangers of being Aquarian. It’s an allegory for discrimination. “Don’t be Aquarian; be antiquarian.”

But I notice my Leo-rising horoscopes warned against starting any drama or making any big entrances. Does this count? Is it lousy astro-karma to release my film now?

Also, on a separate note, I wondered if you had to make an allegorical film on discrimination: which Sun Sign would you pick?

Thanks,
-There are two I’s in Gemini

The Secret Genius And Magical Powers Of The Pisces

Dear Ms. Two “i” Gemini,

It is genius. The drama would be if you rocked up at the judge’s house to demand why you did not win. You would be in a gold lurex cape for your Leo Rising and proceed to demonstrate the fierce Gemini skill of arguing both sides at once. I don’t see why posting your genius online is a provocative move. 

Which Sun Sign would I pick to make my propaganda movie about? Good question! Gemini is the sign that I receive the most “complaint” emails about. They seem to rile a lot of people. I’d go for The Dangers Of Pisces. People always underestimate Pisceans and often depict them in terrible ways. For example, I saw a zodiac fashion shoot where Pisces was a woman’s legs sticking out of a trash can. They’re the one Sun Sign that it seems okay to denigrate.

So I would so the film about the dangers of Pisces but make it secretly really subversively flattering.

What does everyone else think?

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sal29
sal29
December 13, 2013 3:10 am

I don’t know that Pisces is often discriminated against, but I did find a book very recently titled How to Survive a Pisces. Wish I’d been able to figure out the author’s sign.

She didn’t write a handbook for any other sign but Pisces. The tone was lightly disdainful; she obviously found the type draining to be around.

"THE LEO" AKA SCORP-TASIC
"THE LEO" AKA SCORP-TASIC
December 12, 2013 8:56 am

If you really need someone to discriminate against, do it to a Leo because they won’t care…….(unless someone tells them)

Too busy being worshiped by their throngs of adoring acolytes ….and also (in their infinite charity) tossing out fashion advice to those they deem worthy…….

(maybe this is just my scorp side plotting to get more attention on the Leos in this convo—–THERE CAN NEVER…..BE TOO MUCH LEO)

–DO IT BIG OR GO HOME!

Blue Moon
Blue Moon
December 11, 2013 8:40 pm

There are two i’s in Gemini.
Genius
I HAVE to see this film.
You are destined for greatness, fuq the nay saying sheople, anyone who ever had brain would give you AN AWARD. And I predict just based on that piece of concise, hilarious writing and your outrageously cool concept fame, success and recognition for your creative genius. Don’t you dare give up.
I know you won’t. Two i’s in Gemini, I almost hate you for being so clever. Total Venus envy. No wonder you weren’t picked for the chorus line, your a star. Seriously.

R(aqua/tauri)
R(aqua/tauri)
December 12, 2013 4:38 am
Reply to  Blue Moon

Omg “Venus envy”. I am stealing this! 😀

Xx
Xx
December 11, 2013 7:23 pm

I wouldn’t say gems complain… Well maybe they do but I always took their inquisitiveness as being the driver. Like they’re looking for a pattern in order to understand better.
I think all signs go through a picked on stage. Goes in waves.
I remember reading that aquas were most likely to have breakdowns or end up committing horrific crimes. How crap an intro to astro would that be?

Aquariscorp
Aquariscorp
December 13, 2013 3:42 pm
Reply to  Xx

Heavily desired an aquarian child and received it. I named her after a Peter Gabriel song, Skye Blue. My Leo rising relishes her persona and my Scorp sun fiercely protects her. She’s the air bubbles surrounding the depth of the waters of my soul. 🙂

Rache(aqua/tauri)
Rache(aqua/tauri)
December 11, 2013 5:13 pm

Hah! That was awesome. “A sickness…a sickness of the mind.” It may be satirical but this part is true. x__x

I would say Capricorns get the lamest and least accurate portrayal, generally speaking.

virgolicious
virgolicious
December 11, 2013 5:10 pm

I don’t get it.

calypso
calypso
December 11, 2013 9:10 pm
Reply to  virgolicious

lol!

Water girl
Water girl
December 11, 2013 4:30 pm

Damn I thought this post was going to be about the dating dangers of Aquarius Men. There are massive sections on how to deal with this maddengly adorable genius and future oriented man. Ik would love some tips if anyone can relate? I am sun rising cancer moon in scorp. But my north node in leo conjunct his moon and my south node conjunct Shia aquarius sun. Soo.. He is aqua sun pisces rising leo moon. Any chance whatsoever that that’s will work? O and he has venus in aquarius opposite my venus in leo.any hope??

monte
monte
December 11, 2013 7:04 pm
Reply to  Water girl

None.

calypso
calypso
December 11, 2013 9:08 pm
Reply to  monte

Run.

electric eel libran
electric eel libran
December 11, 2013 9:59 pm
Reply to  calypso

what starts out as his charming quirks grows into the emotional equivalent of a giant rash, causing intense itching and insomnia. My Cancer friend said this right after dumping her Aqua. It’s sort of mean but sort of true. Most of my female Crab friends have little tolerance for this kind of bs. She’s dating a Scorp now which suits her more.

calypso
calypso
December 11, 2013 10:09 pm

I was sort of joking but I didn’t get a chance to find out if “his charming quirks grows into the emotional equivalent of a giant rash” because before that had a chance to happen I had played my role in fulfilling his destiny and he had moved on without a backward glance.

Water girl
Water girl
December 11, 2013 10:10 pm

Omg so funny but scarily kinda accurate. These aquarius men are great at the beginning showering you with attention and bring sweet and then u start to see their other side and it’s not do pretty. Too emotionally detached for this me!

DP
DP
December 12, 2013 11:49 pm
Reply to  Water girl

Whoa that is scarily accurate with my experience with Aquarius.

I have to say- having a Scorpio moon myself- it doesn’t blend well with Aquarius’s detachment. Scorpio moons need total melding. Aqua wants none of it. Mine even had Pisces moon/Scorp rising, but it wasn’t enough to offset the air.

cosmic fleece
cosmic fleece
December 11, 2013 9:35 pm
Reply to  Water girl

might i suggest, only answer every 3rd call / text / email … treat ’em mean …

R(aqua/tauri)
R(aqua/tauri)
December 12, 2013 4:42 am
Reply to  Water girl

Venus in Aqua is going to make it even more of a challenge. I’m an Aquarius and I’ve always found my own kind a challenge to date. Prefer the in-your-face ness of fire signs or emotional intelligence of scorpios or Pisces…me + earth signs = they can’t handle my scatterbrain and me + air signs = we both play cool and it goes nowhere.

Water girl
Water girl
December 12, 2013 7:26 am
Reply to  R(aqua/tauri)

Is your venus in aqua as well as your sun? I am very watery but can also appreciate some space as I have a lot of air in my chart so not the typical cancer. But my venus in leo craves attention and adoration from my boyfriend and finding it hard with his sun and venus in aqua to get that from him consistently as he is busy with his millions of friends and hobbies. And my scorp moon doesn’t like that he stays “friends” with all his exes .

Rache(aqua/tauri)
Rache(aqua/tauri)
December 12, 2013 10:45 am
Reply to  Water girl

No, I have Venus in Capricorn trining moon in Taurus…I come across as weird/Uranian to others and then they are surprised that when it comes to relationships I actually crave more traditional/stable roles (though my Venus-Uranus-Neptune conjunction usually foils these ambitions…)

I speak as someone with a lot of experience w Venus in Aquarius guys, all of them either aqua or Pisces. Venus in aqua totally equals friends with all exes, lack of desire to “own” ones partner. I can be really intense at times and focus on one person at a time, Venus in 8th.

Aquagem
Aquagem
December 11, 2013 1:24 pm

Aquarians levitate!

Wildwood
Wildwood
December 11, 2013 1:21 pm

No way, clearly Sagittarians are the most discriminated against because we can’t just travel and go rockclimbing all the time! FUQ THE SYSTEM!

Great film, well done. I still feel sick from watching the film that won. And confused. I don’t understand why it won, even sans terrible homo and trans phobia. I guess it means something positive that so many people expressed their outrage.

Pi
Pi
December 11, 2013 12:01 pm

Virgos discriminate
librans adjudicate
scorpios fornicate (masturbate?)
Aquarians debate
Leos travelate (http://www.tourismnewzealand.com/media/823450/travelator.jpg)
Saggitarians pontificate
Pisceans stay up late
Taureans just ate
Geminis caffeinate
Capricorns ruminate
Cancerians won’t be late
Aries at the gate

Pi
Pi
December 11, 2013 12:05 pm
Reply to  Pi

I forgot renovate. someone has to renovate. but I can’t decide who.

cosmic fleece
cosmic fleece
December 11, 2013 9:31 pm
Reply to  Pi

Ohh i love it Pi !
Hmm the most consistent renovators i know are la Katakans. Le toros for more major works, however a lot of time planning and getting in architects .. la katakans seem love a fresh lick of paint, and always have a ”i’m renovating the bathroom/kitchen/painting the bedroom/loungeroom/bookcases” going on.

Love your work beautiful ! xx

Scorpbot
Scorpbot
December 11, 2013 12:10 pm
Reply to  Pi

Love these!!

I think Saggos travelate

Capricorns dominate. 🙂

Scorpbot
Scorpbot
December 11, 2013 12:42 pm
Reply to  Scorpbot

Scorpios infiltrate

Cancers incubate

Pisceans procrastinate and hesitate

Leos create

calypso
calypso
December 11, 2013 9:07 pm
Reply to  Scorpbot

both of you are brilliant! and Pi, in answer to your question, it all depends on the options available at the time 😉

Pi
Pi
December 11, 2013 11:51 am

I’m surprised that Geminis even bother to write and send an email to complain about discrimination. “there’s always another way” … or is that my watery mercury in effect.

pff
pff
December 11, 2013 11:14 am

aquarius could read all the books desired but could NEVER be virgo — virgo’s going to notice they’re copying every word they say and every style they posses. (detailed) virgo will hate you (vengeful). “study away, be fake, cloak the mind with false mannerisms and mimicked attire.” (sarcastic)

The Leo Socialite
The Leo Socialite
December 11, 2013 10:25 am

Off topic but i am printing out the Thursday horoscopes for Leo and putting them on my mood board mystic!!!

Blue Moon
Blue Moon
December 11, 2013 8:43 pm

What is a printer?
Is that like a fax machine?
I’m kidding because I’m jealous. I don’t have one.
I often feel like printing the scopes out too.
X

calypso
calypso
December 11, 2013 9:03 pm
Reply to  Blue Moon

I have bad luck with printers. They seem so difficult to work! and to keep working! Annoying fiddly things….I once broke two printers in one day at the office I worked in. Must have gone at them like a bull, lol.

Lux Interior is My Co-Pilot
Lux Interior is My Co-Pilot
December 11, 2013 9:51 am

This is genius! Especially love the way she chooses discriminating Virgo as her new sign! Hilarious! The souring of milk!

Tropfest is usually always won by wanky/annoying films–consider not having won an honour! One is know by the company one keeps.

Mistess Gem
Mistess Gem
December 11, 2013 9:04 am

“There are two I’s in Gemini!!!” Love it!

Charlotte
Charlotte
December 11, 2013 8:52 am

Thanks Mystic! And thanks for the thumbs up everyone!

Gemini’s email the most about discrimination? Why am I not surprised?… I did just make a whole film to complain about it. Imagine if I DID make it ‘The Dangers of the Gemini’? You’d be cyber-knee-deep in Gemini emails!!

calypso
calypso
December 11, 2013 9:01 pm
Reply to  Charlotte

I liked your film Charlotte although I didn’t quite get the significance of the napkin gag….

I thought it was heaps better in many ways than the film that won. My opinion is that the only way that guy could imagine his film was funny is that he has such a distant experience of discrimination. Send him a link to yours….in fact maybe Tropfest should promote your film as a redemption strategy!

The Leo Socialite
The Leo Socialite
December 11, 2013 8:43 am

Clever concept, well executed, origiinal beautiful work yet thing that one was boorish un funny thing that looked like made by engineering students in the 80s

Saturnalien
Saturnalien
December 11, 2013 8:40 am

I reckon Capricorns are probably the most discriminated against sign, it’s just that most of us are too busy plotting world domination, and being grumpy and shit to start writing letters of indignation about how much people love to hate the goat peeps.

S
S
December 11, 2013 11:23 am
Reply to  Saturnalien

I <3 Goat folk. Maybe Santa will bring me one for Christmas.

Scorpbot
Scorpbot
December 11, 2013 11:58 am
Reply to  S

I LOVE, LOVE. LOVE the goats too. 🙂

Pi
Pi
December 11, 2013 11:45 am
Reply to  Saturnalien

I’d love to see a post for the latest on Capricorns. Not necessarily the corporate straight-hair theme, Half of them are caught up in a sun/pluto-quake right now. but true to form they are bearing the brunt in their usual stoic fashion. but what becomes of a Capricorn in the wake of a pluto conjunct sun transit? enquiring minds want to know.

Scorpbot
Scorpbot
December 11, 2013 11:58 am
Reply to  Pi

would love to know too! – Nigella?

Saturnalien
Saturnalien
December 12, 2013 10:25 am
Reply to  Pi

I’ve just watched two friends go through this transit, nothing gruesome or Nigella-ish to report there. I’m still going through it, so far, nothing gruesome or Nigella-ish going down with me either. Pluto is still my bitch, but I’ll report back when the transit is completely done and dusted. (Pluto on my Venus was immediate and obvious, Pluto on my Sun, kinda ‘meh’ so far.)

electric eel libran
electric eel libran
December 11, 2013 10:05 pm
Reply to  Saturnalien

whatchoo taking about? people love Caps when they have your back. no one wants a Cap plotting against them though.

Quadrupled
Quadrupled
December 11, 2013 7:54 am

The film is hilarious and brilliant! 🙂

About discrimination, all signs deserve equal opportunity smack. Geminis may be more vocal about it, because they tend to communicate more than the other signs. I am surprised to learn that Scorps air their grievances, but that is likely because they trust Mystic. 🙂

Another Gem.

Baristagem
Baristagem
December 11, 2013 8:35 am
Reply to  Quadrupled

Are we more vocal because we enjoy the debate?

High school debating team of 1998

(no, I wasn’t a nerd)

Pi
Pi
December 11, 2013 11:41 am
Reply to  Baristagem

there’s nothing wrong with being a nerd. *Nerd Pride!!*

Baristagem
Baristagem
December 11, 2013 1:35 pm
Reply to  Pi

Definietly not Pi! It’s just that I wasn’t smart or focused enough to be a nerd, I just loved argument. I wish I was a nerd!

Baristagem
Baristagem
December 11, 2013 1:36 pm
Reply to  Baristagem

Sorry about the typo 🙁

pi
pi
December 12, 2013 12:26 am
Reply to  Baristagem

It’s not just nerds who are ‘smart’ Think of your gemmy mind!
I do love a bit of the ol’ argue. But over time have learnt when and where a little better. Och.

Ps . typos – don’t worry – i figure we’re all smart enough to know what we each mean 🙂 xox.

ToroScorpra
ToroScorpra
December 11, 2013 7:18 am

This film is brilliant, and it should only raise your astro-karma. Really, well done.

electric eel libran
electric eel libran
December 11, 2013 4:55 am

Must go check out the film! sounds interesting! Lol? Scorps think they are discriminated against? why is that? everyone wants to claim a piece of Scorpio even if it’s a asc or NN or mars…because it’s the sign that gets the most written about in regards to sex. I find this humorous. Gemini? Everybody loves Gemini unless they get double crossed or cheated on with one. They are the ultimate party and good times peeps! a good source of reliable gossip and intelligent. I think Libras are discriminated against. One time I was on an online astrology group and the… Read more »

Ms.
Ms.
December 11, 2013 6:41 am

Yes but in super straight land sex is such a fucking issue

Double Happiness
Double Happiness
December 11, 2013 7:10 am
Reply to  Ms.

“Sex is such a fucking issue” not wrong hahaha

Ok the sign I would discriminate against would be Capricorn – only due to my history with ex, brother, sister and various workmates….. It’s the iron fisted control issues and self righteousness that get up my goat (hee hee)

Ms.
Ms.
December 11, 2013 7:16 am

don’t talk to me about Capricorns right now…

Baristagem
Baristagem
December 11, 2013 8:37 am
Reply to  Ms.

😆

Ms.
Ms.
December 11, 2013 9:33 am

I don’t sign discriminate,

I am pro equal opportunity for assholes, sign is only the flavour and the style of the delivery

electric eel libran
electric eel libran
December 11, 2013 5:36 pm
Reply to  Ms.

i so agree with this.

electric eel libran
electric eel libran
December 11, 2013 7:46 am
Reply to  Ms.

i wish i could disagree but yeah sex is such an issue for me too. Lol!

I am aiming to actually have sex in 2014. Maybe 2014 will be a lucky enough year to stop a 3 yr drought? I haven’t even had a date or hug from a man. Sucks. Makes me wish I were into women. It’s just not my thing.

MmeE
MmeE
December 11, 2013 9:12 am

I know what you mean; there are so many great single woman around however it too is not my thing; This year I finally had sex after a 7 year drought! I suggest you don’t let it get that long as I was like a rabbit in headlights! Sadly that was short lived. My moon in Taurus was very excited about finally having some skin on skin action; it’s ready to feed again…lol

Catzai
Catzai
December 11, 2013 10:37 am
Reply to  MmeE

😉
I broke my 3 year vow of celibacy on the night of this past Scorpio dark moon.
Think along the lines of living like a Nun to ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey’ in a flash – and boy am I getting an, ahem, education.
Can’t stop smiling, like the Cat that got the cream…

electric eel libran
electric eel libran
December 11, 2013 5:33 pm
Reply to  Catzai

more like cat that got the canary! meow! you go! Mission accomplished!

electric eel libran
electric eel libran
December 11, 2013 5:35 pm
Reply to  MmeE

My biz partner is Libra with toro moon as well! She can be quite stubborn too, but I out do her. She gave in twice but was disappointed each time. 🙁

Sunrise
Sunrise
December 11, 2013 5:20 pm

Hi Electric Eel Libran

I am also a Libra and had a long drought, but it was broken in about May earlier this year. I know how you feel! But wondering why yours hasn’t broken yet.

Perhaps now with Mars in Libra? Just don’t jump into bed with the wrong person during venus retro though.

electric eel libran
electric eel libran
December 11, 2013 5:32 pm
Reply to  Sunrise

I don’t think I’m in danger of hasty jumping! LOL! Not unless my dream guy decides to book a flight down here. Then ill be in danger!
but it is probably because I’m a stubborn jackass who prefers my own company to an inadequate one: scorp moon, venus in virgo sq neptune, sat in the 7th… and despite being a Libra
i don’t pretend feelings. i either have them or i don’t.

3 yrs is the time since my last date but it has actually been 8 yrs having satisfactory sex.

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