The Christmas Rebel Manifesto

Filed in Capricorn

Okay i was going to say that I’m grinching Christmas but that’s not really accurate – i am the Christmas Rebel. Without a nanogram of hate in my heart for the Xmas Freaks who are bats for this time of year, here are a few basic points off my Christmas Rebel Manifesto.

* Due to it being a Stolen Pagan Festival (once was Saturnalia) Xmas is scheduled for the time of Capricorn, the most astrologically ludicrous time of the year for a thing involving downing tools, over-indulging and mindless materialism.  I’m all about cold showers & kettlebells for maximum Awesome at the moment, not guzzling warm champagne whilst i make small talk or peruse aisles of naff over-priced Xmas place settings.

* Even if you are a massive fan of Jesus and an avid church-goer, Jesus was not a Capricorn.

* Presents, my god: Isn’t it 1000x cooler to get gifts for your peeps when you feel like it, they extra-need a dose of something beautiful or you see something perfect? Not to be dragooned into a retail bender/debt right when the world is just starting it’s Zap Zone evolution (sorry) and the Capricorn vibe is hissing hints about “smart money.”? Oh and despite the tone of some of the media drivel this time of year, it is not actually our personal civic responsibility to ensure certain dinosaur department stores or other businesses stay afloat. 

* Christmas Trees  – especially in hot Summer-Xmas countries like Australia that don’t need an evergreen reminder in the depths of Winter  that Spring will return – are un-eco, all those plantations of pine trees grown and then chopped off so there are little hills of stumps everywhere, like The Lorax non-stop.  And then they’re chucked out at the end of Christmas. Plus i am sorry but a tree sitting in your living room with its life-force slowly ebbing away is not exactly fantastic Feng Shui.

* It is the time of year that’s meant to be about everyone chilling out & reconnecting with family/friends etc and i totally get that (even though such a festival should be timed for the time of Taurus or Kataka, quite frankly) but for SO many people it becomes a series of ever more dutiful obligations that has very little to do with actual relaxation. Here at Christmas Rebel H.Q we do exactly what at want chez Xmas btw. The only problem is that there are no gyms open that day.

* Maybe i have this slightly wrong but was not Santa Claus an invention by Coke?  As in sugary kilojoule additive bomb drink – not Space Dust? So there was once some revolting Xmas Demon who would home-invade via the chimney (of all the sick ideas) and then this demon got sanctified into the more kindly Saint Nicholas and then Coca Cola turned that character into a sort of obese old guy with an apparently unlimited supply of presents.

* Christmas seems to involve sanctimonious messages from Archbishops and the like, all about how we should repent, remember our mortality in the midst of our drunken cavorting and try to be less adulterous, avaricious and/or gay in the new year.  This from a mob who seem to side with child sex abusers on a regular basis is a bit much. Given that a massive percentage of peeps in the world are Pagan, Islamic, Jewish, Buddhist etc, this celebration takes over the Mainsteam Media (MSM) to a ludicrous extent.  

I could go on and on (once started, Mercury in Aries does not stop easily) BUT what do you think? Are you going to join my Xmas Rebel Cause or am i just in denial about being a total grinch?

Image: Scarlett Veith – Society 6

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191 thoughts on “The Christmas Rebel Manifesto

  1. Hi Mystic – interesting thoughts, however the origin of this festival goes way beyond Saturnalia…Apols for length…

    Firstly – here is the origin of Santa –

    BTW Santa is Odin! (Or St Nicholas the Greek, or some ancient god).. Coca Cola invented the red and white furry uniform in an ad campaign, but gifts and partying have been part of the winter solstice celebrations for millenia.

    This winter solstice stuff originates in the Northern hemisphere – and I think this is important (especially for you hot, sunny Antipodeans). In days of yore this is the gnarliest, coldest, boringest time of the year.

    Your subsistence farmers were knackered, there was little to do in the fields, its always dark – so – to make sure the sun returns let’s set fire to stuff and have a damn good party (for a fortnight) to cheer ourselves up. Could the Capricon/Saturn?party time thing be the reward for the years labour, no? This tradition is ancient, so…..

    If you are in the UK, go see the sunset at Avebury rings on the 21st of december. Talk about incredible – it’s 6000 years old and produces one of the best celestial conjuring tricks ever the world has ever seen. You have the chief druid talking you through it all. Christian/Commercial Xmas can piss off. But Super chilled pagan yule – it rocks!

  2. hahaah i was definitely running around my house screaming that i was the grinch yesterday!! probably with more excitement and laughter than anyone in a mall taking santie photos. completely agree with this rant and agree that it could go on lol

  3. I agree with you on all points. However, it feels liberating to make my own traditions, bake what cookies I am craving and watching beautiful classics like It’s a Wonderful Life. What do you think George Bailey’s astro sign is? I think this movie is very Pluto in Capricorn. Love, friendship and everyday simple good deeds outweigh all the riches Mr. Potter has.

  4. “Xmas is scheduled for the time of Capricorn, the most astrologically ludicrous time of the year . . .”

    Oh you’ve nailed it Mystic, but this is so obvious once put into so many words.

    And the excuse that Xmas is for children? (eyeroll) I’m not sure what the rejoinder is for this in the company of careworn parents, but something in me rebels against spoilt brats with lists of expensive presents. I went off at the exes offspring when last year she said that if she didn’t get a 16 gig Iphone she wasn’t going to like anything less. Exactly like the meme getting around facebook. I was gobsmaked, and boy did she get ‘what for’ from the evil girlfriend! I couldn’t help myself. The expectation that hundreds of dollars be forked out to assuage parent’s guilt sent me straight into censorious Saturn mode.

    I’ve done several Xmas’s on my tod and usually I eat something indulgent so I won’t feel sorry for myself–I suppose. But actually feeling sorry for myself is the furthest thing from my mind as I enjoy the P&Q of Christmas Day and could forgo the gourmet food. I’m in complete agreement –it’s really dumb time of year astrologically to expect people to be feeling ‘jolly’ –FFS.

  5. well well well, first time i have ever read my very point of view about xmas. and so Well Put! A view I have held since aged 12, sed fuq to the hypocritical family bitching & bewailing & went to Balmoral Beach on my own, noting how difficult it was hitch-hiking xmas day. Noel chaque jour a la Rimbaud!

  6. It is the right time of year for a holiday, but not the right tradition has been put on it. We’re sooooooo detached from our agrarian roots.

    My daughter asked me if Santa was real and I don’t lie to her about anything. I told her “do you really think a fat white man flies through the sky to break into our house and give us stuff?” We laughed about it but she’s only 7 and she still wants to play make believe. I make it a pain in the ass for her Dad and the friends kids who are all into the charade. Fuck it. If shes ask me about Santa now, I tell her “do you really want to talk to me about this?” And she says no. So be it. We still laugh about the truth together.

  7. Me and my daughter had a talk about zombies the other day. I told her they were real. She said how. I said any person – living or dead – who holds onto the feeling of anger or depression for so long they no longer remember why they are angry or depressed is a zombie. She said she was going to make it her mission to make a zombie happy. She would learn about them and figure it out. I told her its impossible to understand a zombie and the more you try the more you become like them. That’s how they eat your brains.

    Its amazing how deeply you can cut to the truth with a child. And Christmas celebrates the grown-up liar. I hate it. There’s real magic at play in this world, not just costuming and tricks.

  8. I could take or leave christmas, but my partner and I have adopted the utilitarian and self-reflective aspects of the time of year and stay up all night for the solstice, being together, finishing hand-made gifts for the kids, wrapping presents, watching bollywood movies, watching the snow, drinking coffee, and watching the sun rise in AWE the next morning. I’ve come to love it, really.

    After this, the christmas festivities are seen for what they are – general excuses for gift-giving, eating special foods, fun, and sharing extras unconditionally.

    We do nothing with extended family during December. It’s better that way.

  9. AGREED.

    My eldest son got Winter Solstice presents from his dad and I when he was really little. Other family members sent Christmas presents. Eventually Christmas won out, but we do still aknowledge the Solstice.

    Hope all are well. My computer broke and I haven’t dealt with it. I peak in now and then.

    Thinks in the swamp of my life are going really good. Have had a string of broken things… phone, computer, car motor, my son’s IPod, and my washer has to be hit like Fonzie hitting the jukebox. Mercury Retrograde hit hard.

    Have tons of work, family is great.
    Happy Holidays.

  10. someone i used to work with called christmas “the festival of the retailers” couldn’t agree more

  11. Do your own thing and be content with it, is my take on it, as I said above replying to Virgo Earth Monkey.

    Just as there are plenty of peeps who make retailers happy, there are plenty who do their own thing and make Christmas about connecting genuinely with others. I’m not gonna crap on that.

    For me around this time of year is a spiritual time, remembering the good Christmases I had when I was a wee thing, with the best Opa in the whole world. He’s a Capricorn incidentally, one of the funniest, kindest, warmest, loving spirits I’ve had the honor to meet in this lifetime.
    And as it turned out my maternal Oma too, who was a Pisces, absolute honor to have her as one of my Guides now (she made one of my fave dresses ever when I little, and I was/still am an honorary boy).

    If it’s about being together with people you love and it’s done not out of a sense of chore, and out of genuine love, then go for it.
    If it’s about helping many others who are less fortunate, in any way possible, fuq yeah, spread the generosity around.
    So long as there’s no proselytizing by door-knocking people of certain religions, it’s ok.

    Consumerism isn’t just limited to Christmas in societies. And here’s a pun: we don’t have to buy into it. Ba dum tiss… 😉

    Whatever you choose to do, be loved and be safe.

  12. Having a very rough time this holiday season because it is overshadowed by this insanity with my housemate who I am evicting.
    It’s getting worse by the day. The lawyers are handling the ‘negotiations’ right now for a settlement, but it is getting very ugly and my housemate is pulling all sorts of punches in this.
    I’m really just blown away by it all, how diabolical one person can be.
    It’s seriously affecting me financially, too, and if it goes to court I’ll have to miss time from work, so losing more money. My housemate is like an energy sink-hole, and is sucking my money by not paying rent and forcing me, through the situation, to have paid a lawyer and now possibly spending time in court…………and to what end?!?! It’s pure evil…she is pure evil. When I say that, I am not exaggerating.

    Anyway, yeah, there will be no Christmas for me and it’s possible that could be another horrible day in my house if the housemate is home that day, because she has taken to actively harassing me. I did have the police come last Friday and talk to her after she freaked out yelling at me, but it did no good. She just retaliated worse. She really went off the rails on me with verbal abuse on Sunday……it just goes on and on….
    I am getting counseling from an agency that deals with domestic violence, because that is basically what this is. Same dynamic.

    No Christmas, no rest, no respite……I wonder if this situation will EVER end?! The current astro does not seem to be on my side…. 🙁

    • Omg, I cannot imagine. It’s enough sometimes when David, my condo mate, does not wipe out the micro oven or wipe grubby Kataka paws off the trash bin lid..At such times at least his teeth are in? :mrgreen:

      Geeze, wish I could help. I’ll come over in Aries fashion and kick her ass for ya if you like…I mean really…I’ll mess her up big time…

      • Thanks! At this point, I’d like to take you up on that. It’s looking more and more like drastic measures need to be taken.
        This girl is so litigious, though, I’m afraid to even LOOK at her as she would construe it into something she would try to sue me for……she, and this situation are completely over the top.
        I am a tenacious person and have inner strength but I’m extremely sensitive, too. This whole thing is just killing me inside…. I’m so angry about it and afraid of her at the same time….at least I have a lawyer, and he seems to be a good one. I just hope I prevail at the end of it all and that justice is on my side……….would everyone please pray for me and send me good vibes? Thanks a million!

        I’m hoping for a happier New Year!

        • Me too. Hang in there! Don’t give her your sanity.

          Or play christmas carols and cds ALL day if she’s home 😉

    • Stick heaps of rose quartz and clear quartz tumbled stones (not expensive) around your home where they can’t be seen (under cushions or in the covers, etc), Anonymous, but first sit with them, hold them to your heart, ask for the highest good for both of you, then send love to your housemate, however hard that is. Not love at the physical level, asking too much, but love at the spiritual level asking for a resolution of this conflict. Listen to where your crystals tell you to place them (pointing out it has to be unobtrusive otherwise your fruitcake tenant might hurl them at you!). Then let it go, TREAT yourself to something lovely, even if it’s just a big self-hug or a single rosebud. Or go to a funny movie (not a weepie, for god’s sake) and have a damned good laugh. Alternatively when you’re housemate goes off her rocker, laugh, shrug, turn your back and let her get on with it. Now THAT will her drive her nutso but screw her sanity, it’ll save yours.

    • I like Aphrodite’s advice. Whatever you do, try to make time to do something nice for yourself. A movie, some treat, something to remind yourself of your ability to enjoy life and care for yourself. I hope this conflict resolves for you soon. This person seems really attached to you. I know that’s odd since they’re toxic and mean, but…I picture that you are kind. And perhaps that’s the attachment. I don’t know. Its muddy and certainly not under your control. But, if you can recognize and consider the bond between you two, (the conflict keeps her bound to you and she apparently knows no other way to bond) is real although unpleasant, perhaps you can help to release it on the energetic level and wish her well on her way to her new crazytown? Visualize the bond (no judgement), and visualize the dissolution of it. Maybe that will help?

      • Anon, i sympathise and yes only vibing love to her
        no matter how bizarre that sounds, it works to make YOU feel better. It’s an untenable situ and is it evil or mentally deranged?The symptoms are the same and It brings out your shadow self, in fact she IS your shadow and in a way it is a cleansing of your soul because you will rise above it and do not engage verbally as it adds fuel to the fire. Not a word. Mantra that: do not engage.
        Just think how fantastic you will feel when she is finally gone, focus on that fresh future when you will be as light as a feather after closure.
        My legal bill for neighbour crap was 5K but i won so court had to pay it.
        You are also running the gamut of heavy emotions anger, frustration and the ‘why me’ but it will make you stronger & wiser, believe it.
        Put a rose quartz crystal in your bra to remind you
        to send her love.

        • Thanks, everyone. I am trying to do nice things for myself. Last night I did watch a movie on my computer, and it was a feel-good comedy. Little things like that do uplift me, temporarily, but this court date and all the intimidation that is going along with it is just looming over my head and my daily life is a nightmare..

          Interesting you say that, because I have felt like she is ‘attached’ to me, more like fixated on me, or attached like a leech or a barnacle. She is sucking me dry of my money, my energy, my joy, my sanity. I don’t get it. I feel the energy of it, though, it’s almost like a physical feeling like she’s stuck on me like a suction cup. It’s so weird.. But what’s worse is it feels like she’s entrenched and stuck in the house, like she’s never going to leave.

          But yeah, I really never engage her. I never speak to her, and I try not to be in the same room at the same time or even pass in the hallway.

          I have been trying to ‘release’ her, in that neutral way. It’s difficult to be more positive than that, but what I try to do is pull back my energy, my anger, and just get neutral or indifferent. I never show her my anger, but I try to work on it within myself. It’s kind of the best I can do right now.
          I have been burning my St. Michael candle and have some rose quartz around it in a little altar.

          I’m just doing the best I can. I’m in survival mode and barely hanging on. In the past week, I have felt like I have had a few times where I was really breaking down within myself, like a nervous breakdown, all internal. I’m just not functioning very well..

          thanks for listening.. 🙂

  13. I think you’re bang on…. One year I went out only once to the pharmacy/postal outlet only to look at the line up and turn back around and buy a book of stamps at the cash desk instead. I think I would be more into the season if there were little kids around, My friend goes to the 24/7 gym on Christmas day, lol…. I believe Jesus was a Leo anyways. Ho hum…

    • And the whole thing about people having to have a real live tree because it can’t be fake, while they toss it out on it’s side on boxing day to let it die really gets me….

  14. $100 Amazon card for grandaughter for her ipad…Done…

    Daughters said lets just enjoy the day together and food, etc.

    Okay, giving Pisces Aries Merc a going away prez tomorrow and Xmas party at work Friday but no big deals…

    Five days off this season for Xmas…ah, bliss..No money making three of those days but body restin’ bliss…

  15. My clients are from various countries that are not Christian, so I explain it all and then we’ll go and celebrate our meeting and being together with some international art. We are super excited!!! I thought it was just me, but i guess i talked it up and showed them some little tasters of what we’d see. It’s pretty lovely how many of my Muslim clients have wished me Merry Christmas over the years. Anyway, i’ll be talking up Chinese Lunar New Year when it comes and they’re going to be super excited about that too, since many are from there.

    • thats nice mill. My ex Persian hub did everything American style without complaint. Dragged him to several differenct churches and Chris programs over the years.

    • My ex (Muslim) is really into making sure everyone gets gifts (teachers, friends, etc) and now that we are divorced, he is still the one to do it. I think its because he values the tradition and “principal” somehow although its taken him years to finally buy Xmas decorations for his house (my girl demanded them).

    • That sounds spiffy, Mill! 🙂 And sounds to me it’s lovely it’s about honoring each other’s events, esp. in this world of ours.

  16. “Oh and despite the tone of some of the media drivel this time of year, it is not actually our personal civic responsibility to ensure certain dinosaur department stores or other businesses stay afloat.”