Okay, i was going to say that I’m grinching Christmas, but that’s not accurate – i am the Christmas Rebel. Without a nanogram of hate in my heart for the Xmas Freaks who love this time of year, here is my Christmas Rebel manifesto.
* Due to it being a Stolen Pagan Festival (once was Saturnalia), Xmas is scheduled for the time of Capricorn. That is the most astrologically ludicrous time of the year for a thing involving downing tools, over-indulging, and mindless materialism. Capricorn Season is cold showers & kettlebells or spreadsheets to plan the hustle. It’s not naturally aligned with guzzling warm champagne and small talk with Muggles. And the aisle of naff, over-priced Christmas crap is un-Capricorn.
* Even if you are a massive fan of Jesus and an avid church-goer, Jesus was not a Capricorn.
* Presents, my god: Isn’t it 1000x more refreshing to get gifts for your peeps when you feel like it? Or they extra-need a dose of something beautiful or you see something perfect? Not to be dragooned into a retail bender/debt frenzy in the Pluto in Capricorn economy? Oh, and despite the tone of some of the media nonsense this time of year, it is not our personal, civic responsibility to ensure certain dinosaur department stores stay afloat.
Jesus Was Not A Capricorn, And Christmas Trees Are Bad For The Environment
* Christmas Trees – especially in hot Summer-Xmas countries like Australia that don’t need an evergreen reminder in the depths of Winter that Spring will return – are un-eco. All those plantations of pine trees grown and then chopped off, so there are little hills of stumps everywhere, like The Lorax non-stop. And then they’re chucked out at the end of Christmas. Plus i am sorry, but a tree sitting in your living room with its life-force slowly ebbing away is not exactly fantastic Feng Shui.
* It is the time of year that’s meant to be about everyone chilling out & reconnecting with family/friends etc. But such a festival should be timed for the time of Taurus or Cancer. For SO many people, it becomes a series of ever more dutiful obligations that have little to do with real relaxation. Here at Christmas Rebel H.Q, we do precisely what at want chez Xmas btw.
Christmas Is A Festival Of Cognitive Dissonance
* Maybe i have this slightly wrong but was not Santa Claus an invention by Coke? As in sugary kilojoule additive bomb drink – not Space Dust? So there was once some revolting Xmas Demon who would home-invade via the chimney? The demon got sanctified into the more kindly Saint Nicholas, and then Coca Cola turned that character into a sort of obese old guy with lollies?
* Christmas seems to involve sanctimonious messages from Archbishops and the like, all about how we should repent, remember our mortality amid our drunken cavorting and try to be less promiscuous, greedy or gay in the new year. This from a mob who seem to side with child sex abusers regularly is a bit much. Given that a large percentage of peeps in the world are Pagan, Islamic, Jewish, Buddhist, etc., this celebration takes over the Mainstream Media (MSM) to a ludicrous extent.
Would you like to join my Christmas Rebel group?
Image: Scarlett Veith – Society 6
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