What If You ARE The Energy Vampire?

So many people have problems dealing with energy vampires, but what if you ARE the energy vampire? Mystic advises a Double Virgo who fears she IS one.

Dear Mystic,

It seems that I am one of the people not responding well to the intensity of the stars lately. I’m a double Virgo: Sun and Rising, which seems to make it worse. I’m co-engineering a big project with a Cancerian mentor, who has disappeared and left me with all the work. Instead of calling her on it, I’m complaining a lot in private. I’m on the market for a new job (in academia), and instead of feeling confident in my extensive skills and hot CV, I keep having outbreaks of envy at other job-seekers, some of whom are friends. At least these are private — but it feels selfish, I mean the world is exploding, and Gaza is insane, and I’m obsessing about whether I’ll get the top pick of the jobs? Ugh.

I’ve become negative and unsatisfactory company. I know it, but I can’t pull out of it. I think I am the Energy Vampire like the sort of people I usually try to avoid them. 

Meanwhile, in therapy, I’m having deep insights gel about a long-running pattern of hiding my desires from my loved ones and then trying to access them in guilty secrecy. As a person who has a self-image as smart, diplomatic, and calm, I also realize how angry I am at some of the closest people in my life — and how passive my aggression is. SO St Virgo. Yuck!

Anyhow, these realizations don’t seem to be preventing me from acting out. At all. So what do those of us who are caught up in the passive-aggression, the crappy panic about the world, the self-guilting and everything else? I’ve been trying to do yoga and chill out, but it’s hard work. And sleep? Ha! I haven’t been able to sleep properly for months.

Can you remind me how to Evolve?

Thank you!!!!

St Virgo of the Crumbling Status Quo

Dear St Virgo Of the Crumbling Status Quo,

Hey, can’t fault you for self-awareness. It may be the crisis that so often precedes a fabulous opportunity or transformation. The snake feels like shit in her skin right before she sheds it. She has low or no venom and wants to hide out under a rock all day.

Also, sometimes trying to make yourself chill out doesn’t work – it’s like trying to force an orgasm. If yoga is not doing it, maybe you need to do boxing/martial arts? Job-Seeking, a.w.o.l, Crab Mentor, and confronting demons via psychotherapy is stressful. See a naturopath to help with the sleep scenario; a Virgo martyring themselves over no sleep automatically morphs into an Energy Vampire. 

And, as a Double Virgo, you may feel responsible for everything but Gaza is not your fault, and many a fine diplomatic mind has bent itself trying to solve the situation. Focus on what is in your control: your psyche and daily regime. It sounds like your Virgo Vision got an upgrade, you’re seeing everything more realistically and have a kind of clarity hangover.

And you have the awareness to call yourself on your attitude getting a bit glum and draining. Real Energy Vampires don’t pick up on it. They think they’re reasonable and entitled to other people’s time, money and attention.

What does everyone else think?

Image: Chiharu Shiota

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I m too a double virgo with Leo moon..im so contradictory in wt I project n wt I feel.I gt highly emotional bt nvr show..n gt easily angry especially on the d ones I love..in a way I cn relate to u..


Hey St Virgo of the Crumbling Status Quo – love your name btw – I echo the sentiments above – I think anyone who is writing to Mystic with this much self awareness can’t possibly be a Qi vamp. My tuppence worth about anger, jealousy and envy: our culture teaches that they are negative, but these emotions are simply telling us something about ourselves. I love the quote “anger points the way, not the finger”. In my experience when I feel these emotions it’s because I am living small and something inside is telling me I am capable of more.… Read more »

Anony_Aus/Lux Interior is My Co-Pilot

“I’m also realizing how angry I am at some of the closest people in my life — and how totally passive my aggression is. SO St Virgo. Yuck!” This is the red flag for me right here….as a fellow Virgo, busy phoenixing I would say…WHY are you angry at these people?? And I’d bet this anger is very well-founded (i.e. not trivial). A Virgo always has a damn good reason to be angry. So my advice is really focus on the anger, and don’t even worry about the “why”…but find a way that stops these people affecting you. You might… Read more »


St Virgo of the Crumbling Status Quo

(your name should be a song or painting title. Inspired me today.)

I also agree you are too aware to be a true low down dirty Qi vamp.

Confused Gem

Oh! My Cancer boss has disappeared with quite a bit of money! Are the Cancerians hiding it out? Will they come back? I hope they do!

I’m also looking for a new job because I think my company is just meant to close, too many management problems. All the best in the job hunt! Focus on what you can do? Leave the rest of the universe to figure themselves out for themselves. I’m starting to learn at my current job that if it’s not your business, you shouldn’t waste emotion on it.


Dear St. Virgo, The astrologer Jeff Green always taught to look at Polarity Points. Pisces loves the big picture. Find some some sacred space outside.Nothing like fresh air and nature to calm those nerves!Double up on healthy self indulgence- fast, run outdoors- get a BOB in your garage and kickbox it. I have that Scorpio N. Node sitting on my Part of Fortune. These days I’m either at funerals or in the dojo with my teens. LOL! My top two game changers- The Work by Byron Katie (you’ll love the lists) and tapping/ Emotional Freedom Technique. EFT is way quicker… Read more »


hmm, i agree with the others, you seem too self aware to be a, how do you say in these parts, qi vampire. yes the martial response (or since martial arts are extremely boring to learn at first, something else that actually exhausts you after one session and doesn’t require months / years of dedication) is a good one. make the mind focus on something else, balances body chemistry incl stress hormones, better sleeep. is quitting the best / only solution to your work problem? the passive / angry thing, ask yourself, why, (or what/who/when). don’t stop til your answers… Read more »


Oh oh. I have been wanting to ask that question, “what if I AM a Qi vampire…?”but had felt that the possibility was all too real.
Thank you for this MM. Thank you too St Virgo of the Crumbling Status Quo.


Yeah, second that yoga is too passive pacifist. It’s Bruce Lee’s birthday today. You need to unleash some blind fury but at a wooden doll, or a burlap sack filled with I dunno garbanzo-Gaza beans. Try rock climbing too. It’s monk fury and it’ll wreck your body in a way you won’t need to think.


Hi Virgo, so hope you feel better soon. For sleep, try taking magnesium powder (Blackmores magnesium powder works a treat) about half an hour before bed. I started a new role in May this year – left me frazzled & cranky & sleepless in hell territory. I cannot function without sleep – LOTS of sleep. The magnesium definitely helped me. Hope it may do the same for you.

Ps: I’m Pisces sun, Virgo rising, Saggo moon

Aura Jade

Cacao is great for magnesium as well. It is so great, I reccomend adding it to your cereal/smoothies, or create some deliciously healthy raw vegan treats.

St Virgo 11

OMG I am with you – virgo sun and four other planets in Virgo – nobody ie astrologers just are not getting what we virgo’s are feeling/going through!!!

The astro and all the advice in the world doesn’t match the paradigm. Something is up beyond what everyone is getting. Its like the mercury retrograde when everyone said it would affect the american election and something else happened altogether but we’re not sure what.
Good luck I get how you feel same story same no results!


Dear St Virgo of the Crumbling Status Quo I think you have your finger in the power socket ( so to speak) and you are pretty awesome for framing your “help” in such a honest and humble way. I appreciate that and I’m glad you brought up Gaza cause I feel guilty about that as well. Love and Light to you – this too shall pass.


Doreen Virtue says that envying others is common when you have a similar life path type to them.
She says that if you feel envy, you might use them as an inspiration and emulate their activities/studies etc. It’s about honouring those aspects of yourself rather than passively dwelling in a dark sense.


yes Thomas Moore, Care of the Soul (great book) changed my perspective on both envy and jealousy. He says both can get us in touch with important things about ourselves. Envy shows us what we don´t have enough of in our lives – what am I envious about? how do I get my version of that into my life? and jealousy shows us where we feel insecure, where we don´t feel like we have enough love. I am not jealous of my lover and his friend spending time together if I feel completely secure about my lover´s love…and if I… Read more »


Seething anger a good sign of too much yang energy. As is not sleeping. Go get some acupuncture.


I do therapy and am big into self-awareness. However, the thing that helps me most in life is taking healthy action. Otherwise I just end up with a bunch of thoughts and ideas swimming round in my head and life is the same. So I like to have the realisations and then positive steps, set boundaries etc. Have the inner world realizations and then apply them to the outer world. I think also once you do enough therapy it is almost impossible to NOT take action, because now when someone oversteps a boundary or something happens to me that I… Read more »


Are you at the start of your career? Then feeling competitive at the job market is perfectly normal – and if I may say, that competitiveness will be your edge, only over time it will change its course from a job to research etc. and I agree with the advice here. Forget yoga – I’ve Mars in Aqua 12th house, it is pilates that takes out my anger.

Gemini 1001

LOL .. im a bit prone to ‘Die Antwoord’ at the moment… I think they are the soundtrack to some type of freaky alterego 😉
Which is the planet for freaky alteregos? Neptune could take you there … maybe 🙂


Thanks Mystic for the muay thai advice (relaxation). I hadn’t heard that but it makes sense. I like to watch UFC but hadn’t thought about doing it myself. I have taken the magnesium advice and I sleep much better for it – more efficacious than Valerian for me. Any other destressing advice would be fab.

Gemini 1001

*grimey – not crimey

Little Joey

LOL, I liked the idea of some “crimey” music….


yeh i already had some trax running through my head

Gemini 1001

Id also download some really crimey music and run or punch something too it… its keeping me level 🙂


I was thinking the same thing – waaaaaay too much honesty, calm reflection and self awareness to be a. A bone fide Qi vampire and b. Not have some massive transmogrification just around the corner. Trust the process my dear St Virgo. It is an invisible one and you won’t always see the manouverings and realignments going on beneath the surface of your psyche. But they are happening and you are definitely on track. Therapy is fabulous for accessing the hard-to-get-to bits of our shadow self which have been screened out from the conscious mind. I wouldn’t stress out about… Read more »

Raché (Aqua/Tauri)

I’m going through similar times…the insights, guilt, anger, anger at being saddled with guilt, and uncertainty about my future after realizing how twisted my past is and how unconsciously i repeated this past in my life has rendered me useless and non-functioning. But just before this disturbing non-functioning (which involves not leaving the house in a week+ and crying and shaking every moment I am awake while blanking out and sabtaging work and school by simply not being able to perform, or even DO anything) I was being horrible. I would try and reform, get it together for a week… Read more »


I read through this and can’t help but relate. I think you must be close to my age or not to far off. I feel as if I have went through hell and back as of recent. I can completely relate to everything you just said. My best advice is move onto that next step that is going to be hard, get on with it. I can only say that because it takes one to know one I suppose. I also recommend those prayer rain journals. Finding ways to prey whatever that means to you. Thanks to mystic I kind… Read more »

Double Happiness

I’m also double Virgo (moon and Neptune in Scorpio) and it has been an intense year! I really feel for you and wish you the best…..and hope we all get a break re ancient angst and recent biz overload real soon


I’m glad that there are others who … even though we’re heeding Mystic’s awesome, audacious advice, are struggling to not wig the fuq out.

I think that at the very least, being aware of the things that are coming up, and triggering is good. And maybe Mystic is right — zenning out is not what you need. Perhaps you need to kick or punch it out, or even dance it out wildly. I’m certainly going to try that!

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