She-Leo & He-Aries

Filed in Astro Gaga

W Magazine Charlize Theron & Michael FassbenderEven by the oft-awkward standards of W Magazine Couple Covers, this one could have been tricky to shoot and photo-shop.

So I am too much of a wimp to see Charlize and Michael “sizzle on screen” in Prometheus. Seeing the first Alien made me learn counselling so as to get free group therapy at uni.ย  I may not be ready for the prequel.ย  But they sizzle…yes?

ANYWAY, this cover:

He-Aries:ย  Fuq, fuq – she’s dominating the whole thing with her creamy cleavage rack alert thing…i can’t even jut my jaw out properly because we have to look intimate…what’s that scent? Belladonna? Nitro-Musk? Money? Fuq it, i’m doing some chin-ups on that door ledge when we break in a minute. It will be a dazzling display of physicality and youthful thespian vigor. Chicks love that anti-intellectual shit. We are all apes on the inside, are we not? Truman Capote’s ghost told me something like that that one night when i was doing mushrooms with Philip S-H. Plus I’ll say i’m doing my own swordplay stunts next time i do Shakespeare. Blood does not frighten me but denial…that’s terrifying

She-Leo: I know, i know…he says it’s natural pheromones but…seriously? Luckily narrowing my nostrils makes me look really existential if i clench my pelvic floor at the same time…fool has no idea I am NEVER mating with a male actor again.

 

 

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Pileo-scorp grrrlleo-scorp grrrlandromedahiddendragonqueen Recent comment authors
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Pi
Pi

well, I can say that this magazine cover would not induce me to fork over the $$ and buy the thing. would also not go and see a sci-fi film for the sexual tension. it’s SCI FI! there’s aliens and shit! planets to be saved! ffs. if i wanted sizzle i would watch…. something else.

hiddendragonqueen
hiddendragonqueen

i had to stare at him for a while before i realized “oh, he’s david!” who was the only character in the movie who i liked and thought had potential. but chemistry with charlize?? pure marketing. in general i found the movie pretty, and superficial. they could have taken it 100 x deeper…but i guess it was in the end a summer blockbuster action movie and no more. oh well. nice cinematography…

LadyLeo
LadyLeo

In these covers the woman is always smoothed to perfection and the men are left with all their stubble and wrinkles and pores. WHY?! It’s so unfair to woman that we have to keep seeing other women in mags represented like this. And not just that, but it looks completely odd, this contrast of their skin against each other. Like its totally ok for the guy to have wrinkles and ‘realness’ but not the ladies, oh no, don’t be silly, women can’t have hair, pores (even small non sebum producing ones), slightly uneven skin tone and don’t even get me… Read more »

milleunanotte
milleunanotte

I don’t know that it IS ok… he looks crapulous and dodgy here., as though the photographer just surprised him in the act of chloroforming Theron.

quintile
quintile

agreed – he looks horrid!!

lavenderqueen
lavenderqueen

Sign me up for the lazy girl’s guide to a better body…actors meh

skyler rosey
skyler rosey

My cups runeth over, its not fun. they get in the way and ya never can wear a low cut strapless dress w/o looking trashy. I’ll take tiny titties with a tall slender figure anyday over melons w dangerous curves which at 60 turned into blobs, lol..

Min
Min

๐Ÿ™‚

Anonymous
Anonymous

I’m interested in a post about a Scorpio Woman and Capricorn man who isn’t mentally ill.

Pegasus
Pegasus

Brilliant dialogue Myst!

Therapy after viewing Alien? That’s so funny.Funnier is i felt sorry for the Mutha Alien protecting her eggie things.
Charlize & Michael sure don’t look like the’re in space suits, maybe they
have a little love & ecstasy studio on the ship for grounding purposes?

Charles
Charles

That is quite a miraculous piece of photography, making Charlize look like she has cleavage. Amazingly, it’s not photoshop, it’s just extremely precise lighting.

Pegasus
Pegasus

Yes, most dancers, especially ex-ballet dancers don’t do boobs.Wonder why this is. Whether it’s the naturally small
attracted to it or whether ballet makes them so.
Do YOU know, Charles?

LadyLeo
LadyLeo

If they start young, I think it’s like gymnasts, their bones don’t develop as much as they should so they are generally smaller. Also maybe cos they possibly have restrictive diets…

Charles
Charles

I don’t know, but I am willing to undertake extensive research on this pressing issue.

andromeda
andromeda

hahahaha!

leo-scorp grrrl
leo-scorp grrrl

I do love Aries men and their animal physicallity. From one very leo girl – I am drawn to sun Aries men and non-suns with prominent Aries. There is some chemistry or pheremone or je ne sais qoi. I usually keep it in check, tho cuz it can eclipse reason. Seriously. I mosly like to enjoy them for their spirit in a sports type setting. On the mountain (with all the gear on) or in martial arts class is where they are best kept. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Chrysalis
Chrysalis

I am Leo rising and have never even had a cup of coffee with an Aries man! I’m thinking I like the sound of them, from your description ๐Ÿ™‚ For years I’ve been drawn to the moody, arty, Neptunian types who look like they haven’t seen daylight in decades. I need to do my Leo a bit more, I reckon. Maybe take up hiking ๐Ÿ™‚

quintile
quintile

yes – its all sounding quite interesting! the one on my radar is anti-intellectual (though he has a phd), very upfront (we had a small issue at work and he said to me: “I didn’t want to call you in case you hung up on me.” I thought this was super brave and upfront and not at all the usual pass-agg workplace stuff). He has made numerous jokes about ‘dressing up’ – is that an aries thing or maybe because he’s english?? ๐Ÿ™‚

leo-scorp grrrl
leo-scorp grrrl

Yes, I’ve had a new lease on life with much more out-of-doors after that Aries-Sag. They love to show off what they know. Take an opportunity learn new things! Oddly, I’m now seeing a Pisces.(But, he has an Aries Moon and Venus!)

leo-scorp grrrl
leo-scorp grrrl

Yes, take the opportunity to go hiking! I got lots more out-doorsy with the Aries-Sag. They like ot show off what they know.

LadyLeo
LadyLeo

I love Aries men for their energy and because they don’t muck around with the usual BS. Like you say Quintile, no pass-agg, which is so refreshing!

quintile
quintile

hmm – he’s getting more appealing by the minute – quick someone, stage an intervention this addict is no where near cured!

Chrysalis
Chrysalis

I don’t know if you’ve ever given up cigarettes but there is a point where you say, ‘I haven’t had one for a week, I’m CURED, I will just have this last one to prove to myself I have kicked the habit’ ๐Ÿ™‚

leo-scorp grrrl
leo-scorp grrrl

LOL!

Zaiborg
Zaiborg

There were two huge posters on my bedroom wall growing up as a Scorpy teenager:
Gary Numan in a red leather jumpsuit, and the ALIEN.
That about sums me up entirely…

Rachรฉ (aqua/tauri)
Rachรฉ (aqua/tauri)

i don’t really GET male actors. i’ve never had a crush on one! they are just all so yucky and obviously egomaniacal and manly and ewww. i am more likely to crush hard on an actress. like charlize! she was brilliant in Young Adult, that movie scared the shit out of me more than any Alien film ever will ‘ cause it hit a little too close to home but i couldn’t look away. ———————————- also, side note: i did the most void dark moon in taurus thing EVER last night and woke up at 2 AM to eat a… Read more »

Catsmeow
Catsmeow

I kind of agree! When I saw this movie all the male characters annoyed me and I was far more interested in seeing Charlize and Noomi. Besides I thought Michael’s character was so creepy that whenever he came on screen I kind of felt sick. I’m not sure I understand Michael Fassbender’s popularity, because whenever I see his movies I never like him. I guess he was okay as Magneto in the X-Men film, but other than that I haven’t been able to stand him.

Zaiborg
Zaiborg

Talk about ‘so not me’…
Got into a chilli eating contest at work yesterday. WTF?!
Was up at 2am also, but I wasn’t exactly EATING bricks…

gem
gem

agree with the other comments re: the two characters. however, i thought the movie was fantastic. i like movies that make me think about them long after i’ve seen the film, and this was one of those movies. there are some scenes that tie it to Alien, but it really is a stand-alone movie with it’s own story.

i am surprised no one has mentioned how awesome Noomi Rapace was. i heard she learned english just for this film! she was totally believable in this role. i hope there is a sequel.

creatrix
creatrix

This movie was loads of fun, I totally agree. I had never seen Noomi before in a movie, she is a pretty scary femme. She sets a different tone than the average hollywood girl.

MM you would love it I think!

It plays on the Ancient Astronaut theory of Von Danikin.
It’s quite different from the other Alien movies too, more rich in symbolism.

Pegasus
Pegasus

Thanx for the thumbs up on movie, Creatrix. Of course i will see it regardless couldn’t resist.

Kaz
Kaz

Don’t want to spoil anything but, no sizzle. Their characters rarely interact. He plays a robot. He is more of a semi complicated coffee maker to her. Think Data from Star Trek. Don’t think Data had space tramps lined up for that robotic lovin’ either. Fassbender great actor. Believable robot. Possibly a much better movie if Mystic had penned it.

Zaiborg
Zaiborg

LOL!
Maybe only SciFi geeks like me know this, but I can assure you, Lt. Cmdr. Data was ‘fully functional’….
๐Ÿ˜‰

leogroover
leogroover

Aren’t most men ‘semi complicated coffee maker s’ at the best of times.

berry
berry

I wanted to hit the nonexistent “like” button ๐Ÿ™‚ You win the internet ๐Ÿ™‚

Ruth
Ruth

Thanks for bringing up Aliens Mystic, ….probably won’t be able to sleep tonight. I haven”t been on the edge of my seat at a movie since THAT one!!! LOved and hated it at the same time, yin and yang eh?

anonymous
anonymous

I saw the movie. There was zero sizzle between them and a rather disappointing movie

Anonymous
Anonymous

Agreed. The movie was terrible!

Scorporation, Inc.
Scorporation, Inc.

I adore Philip S-H. ๐Ÿ™‚

another scorp
another scorp

I adore him too!!

Venus a-go-go
Venus a-go-go

Sizzle on screen?
Hrmmm. They both look sharp, but they have little interaction with each other. There is little point to her character and kinda phone the whole performance in, really.
He, however, is the best thing about the film (apart from the fact the cinematography is excellent).
IMHO of course:)

equilibrium girl
equilibrium girl

Agreed. More Fass as David, less…err, everything else in the film. Especially Noomi Rapace’s weird gopher cheeks.

cc
cc

oh that is BRILLIANT!

you should do “the dialogue” more often ๐Ÿ™‚

K.E
K.E

Agreed!