Love Zombie Rehab

Filed in Astro-Query, Leo

“Dear Mystic,

I don’t know if I am being a Love Zombie, if this is a WTF relationship or if I’m just emoting hard because of Venus and the Zap Zone but I would appreciate any advice you could send my way. You obviously get a lot of these so maybe the purpose of this is to just get it off my chest and release.

First of all, you were right in your yearly horoscopes. Its made its presence known since last year but since Neptune sprang back into Pisces in February, my life has slowly shifted. My flatmate moved out, making me realize just how much she took me for granted. I’ve got myself a corporate job that pays well and challenges me on a daily basis not to be a doormat. I broke up with my long term lover, who just wasn’t right for me and I dived into a WTF situation with Mr Aquarius.

To be honest with you, he isn’t even the problem. It’s his ex, Leo Personified (Sun, Mercury, Venus, Mars); a woman who sashays instead of walks, whose face and figure is goddess worthy, a woman who will probably sneer that I’m his replacement.

How do I know that she’ll sneer? Well, a long time ago, we used to be friends.

This is how the story goes with me and Leo Personified: She drifts into my life with apologies for losing contact and her bad behaviour, figures out the man I’m currently into and whilst I am in the process of winning them over, she swoops in and takes them off my hands. Then, when she is bored of them, she leaves us all in the dust and moves onto the next merry band of gentlemen that she can hypnotize with her Leo squared charisma. It wasn’t so bad when we were teenagers but I thought in our mid twenties, she would have fallen out of that behaviour so I believed that this time round, things were different…

Mr Aquarius was the last guy to fall into her orbit and he fell for her hard. Whilst I have now cut her out of my life, what makes this a ‘lady, you don’t need astrology’ situation is I’m now with Mr Aqua. What with all the planetary action, as much as things are amazing with Mr Aquarius at the moment, I almost want to cut him out of my life too.

If it wasn’t bad enough that she steals the guy she knows I’ve fallen for behind my back, the cruelest thing is she told him how I felt about him. We (me and Leo goddess) used to write letters to one another and she would ask me questions about my feelings for him and then show him every single page of my feelings laid bare. I didn’t even know that she was with him until she called off their clandestine romance, I didn’t know that my feelings were a form of amusement for them until much later.

Now I have him and things are going great, I still can’t help but feel cheated. Because I feel like second-best. Because whilst all my feelings have unwillingly been revealed, he’s still an enigma to me. I’m humiliated and embarrassed over something that I consider a strength; my emotional expression and my writing.

Right now, I know Venus in 7Gem is in my 11th house so it makes sense that she is on my mind and oh-so-apt that it’s in the traditional house of Aquarius too. The only major asteroid in the 11th is Chiron. Chiron is about to hit my natal sun too so I get there is a sense of healing. But how does one heal from this? How do I not let it affect this relationship? Or is it already too late?

If you have any thoughts, I would be eternally grateful.

From a Little Fish in a deep, dark Venusian pond x”

Dear Little Fish,

WOW!  Your Ex-Friend Leo Personified is like the scary/sexy/awesome character of Zenia in Margaret Atwood’s The Robber Bride. Really, before you think another thought, get this book and read it!

Now well done with all the Zap Zone morphing – you sound fantastic and no more door-matting. But seriously, what is going on with Mr Aquarius???   There are so many questions here; When you say that you “have” him, are you together-together? So you just left this one long-term relationship for Mr Aquarius and it’s all stable?  Or you mean you “have” him more in a Uranian sense, like a sexual time-share arrangement only his schedule is ratified off-planet?

And have you discussed the fact that he apparently lay in bed entwined with Leo Personified, her long golden limbs wrapped around his (I don’t know) Aqua hips as they chortled together over your EMOTIONS? This is the bit that totally gives me the merdes so one can only imagine where YOU go with this image on a Dark Moon. 

The best interp of this is that he ALWAYS loved her, was temporarily Sex Zombied by Leo Personified and did not really laugh at your letters at ALL. That is just what she said to aggrandize herself. And that one day he came to, the bath salts wore off and he made the right decision to be with you.

But I’m not quite sure about this version of the story…In fact, I am a bit worried that YOU may be in danger of being a Love Zombie. I say this will respect and concern, not to be mean. Because when you say that you “have” Mr Aquarius and yet that he is also “still an enigma”  – something is not vibing right.  If you’re totes together than i guess Leo Personified has to become part of your past like any other Ex.

So please can you clarify some of these points – in the comments – and i am throwing this over to the fabulously erudite commenters here…Thoughts?

Image Credit: Steven Meisel – Vogue Italia – March 2006

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141 thoughts on “Love Zombie Rehab

  1. OMG, you poor thing, you’ve got it bad. Let’s talk:

    1. People make mistakes and if it’s HER telling you that HE laughed at your words- well, how credible is she? Did she make that up? (Maybe. She at least exaggerated.) If it’s even true, did he laugh because he just wanted to get into her knickers? (Yes.) Does that make him a bad person? (Yes.) But is he the same person now? (You don’t know- ergo, enigma.) Even if he was horrible then, you have to decide if you want to forgive him for alleged indignities. Comes back to you.

    2. When you’ve “got” someone and they’ve “got” you, there are no more games. “Being an enigma” is the same as “being an arsewit” if you’re in a relationship. No, one does not need to divulge all and a little mystery only improves a relationship, but if he’s messing with your emotions, then he has to go. And you obviously have enough self-respect for this because you already dumped that other asswit last year. If he brings her up, look at your watch. If you find yourself e-stalking her, distract yourself and reroute those unhealthy neurotransmitters. Again, back to you.

    3. “I feel like second-best.” Um, if he wanted to get with her, he’d get with her. He’s with you because he likes you. Simple as that. There is no “second-best.” Relationships end. New ones begin. It’s not a competition. It’s all about fit. Don’t overanalyze.

    4. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what she did, whether or not he laughed, what your lack of relationship with her does to either of you, whether X or Y or Z, what matters is that you value yourself. (Yes, okay, cue after school special music, fine.) You need to get to a place where you like yourself again.

    • SO agree with SL’s points, esp. 1 & 3. I’m thinking your reference to the Enigma bit is that in comparison to your feelings having been laid bare via the letters, Mr. Aqua has not come close to expressing his to that extent. That however does NOT mean he isn’t expressing it at all or in a fashion more true to himself.

      It is a bit nerve wracking to know that you feel you’ve naught left to hide with all the letters read and that you can’t control what is your strength i.e. your emotional expression and writing which the Jealous Lion hijacked in an act of love terrorism. But some points:

      One, relationships evolve, and though your feelings have been made so glaringly obvious in 10 pt Arial or script to Mr. Aqua, it doesn’t mean he ain’t got more to discover. Your feelings are one part of you, but what of your charming quirks, your lively wit, your smarts, the curve of your gorgeous ass etc etc?

      If anything the Jealous Leo’s stunt back-fired, because there is definitely something to be said for someone being true – as I assume after he read/listened to passages she quoted, he was then able to experience this in the full technicolor glory of being with you.

      Two, almost cutting him out – is that about him, or about the negative feelings attached to this? I’m actually not as worried about you being a Love Zombie, and see all this as you resolving difficult emotions over the Jealous Leo’s betrayal. It’s like you working off the throes of the last bit of poison she left you know?

      It’s also true that we like to think of our relationships coming about in a less beleaguered fashion but sometimes there are reasons for the way things happen we can’t quite see right now. Do you trust that the Aqua is truly there for you? Like SL says it’s all about fit. Not perfection.

      Third, I call her the Jealous Leo as having to rely on Another Woman’s Letters whilst seducing Mr. Aqua is more than a bit despo – hello?? NOT a good look. And it raises trust issues in the sense that if she’s doing that to you, then there can be no doubt in his mind she’ll turn informant on him too.

      Most sane men are very clear about who to settle with i.e. low drama, zero crazy – I don’t think she’s it by miles. And you may also consider that her Love ‘Em & Leave ‘Em stance is possibly stage managed as she cannot actually sustain a healthy relationship, and saying “I’m Bored” is a euphemism for “I’m Afraid I’m Actually Boring”.

      What else does she actually have to offer beyond the thrill of chase and acquisition?? I think you’re putting way too much stock in her swagger and I agree with Venus a Go Go that she’s threatened by you. As she pointed out that is a fuqload of effort to go through for someone you think she’ll just sneer at as a replacement.

      She’s identified you as her competition from the Get-Go because she knows you have something she doesn’t. If she were Real Leo Royalty, trust me, she’d be treating you with benign compassion and being a lot more big hearted than all this.

      I think you just need to process this and make your peace with the past..but I really don’t get the sense there’s an issue with Mr. Aqua. Most Aqua Men are enigmatic about their feelings – I have Moon in Aqua and what MM wrote is true, I vibe super transparent but seriously, there is a lot more than I ever let on.

          • Thanks for your words of empowerment! What particularly struck a chord with me is the point brought up by Fallen Angel. I think my thoughts concerning wanting to let him go came down to the fact that I felt there was a taint to this relationship in the guise of the Leo Lady. But this new relationship only came into question because I gave her that importance. I wanted to understand and resolve and forgive when really I should just be following through with my gut reaction which was bye bye Leo Lady!

            In the realms of love, you are going to come across exes. I happen to know mine so yes, that’s somewhat icky and weird but does it put me off wanting to be with him? No. It’s her showing him things that I had sent to her in confidence that puts a dark spin on things. But you are right, there is plenty of stuff left for us to explore so all is not lost!

            And also, Suddenly Leo, you are right with that point about it coming back to me. I am a little insecure and I definitely have a tendency to overanalyse but its about loving and believing in myself and doing the things that are inherently right for me. Because if I can see with my own eyes that she is completely insane and just toxic, why am I allowing her to affect whats in the now?

            I wanted to go through more but my head is spinning. Will have to post more tomorrow. Thank you for responding! Your words, alongside so many other users of this blog have struck a chord with me so do not think your advice has gone unappreicated.
            LF xx

      • ““I’m Bored” is a euphemism for “I’m Afraid I’m Actually Boring”.”

        No, it means there may be a preponderance of Aries, Gemini, or Mercury or Uranus in the chart.

        The idea that healthy relationships are defined by endurance is Taurus-Cap propaganda, not universal, nor reflective of anything astrology helps us understand about the difference between conformity and individuality.

  2. Ive said this many times, mainly/mostly to myself, but take back your power. Now! When you do you see things with much more power therefore make better decisions. Fuq this bitch off once & for all, physically, psychologically its a trouble maker pro. And people get away with this shit because no one takes it up to them. I’m amazed at how so many, once they like someone &/or get involved give all their power away & lose any control & the ability to see with clarity themselves or whom their involved with. It just ends up to being a love/lust zombie or whatever it is but it’s just not a good look or good for your soul.

    • ditto.
      I’d ditch the witch. Send her packing. Date a guy she has not yet, met and keep it that way.
      Mr. Aqua sounds awful. Laughs at your letters? Cruel.
      Goodbye to both.
      There’s plenty of new men out there.

      • Savannah, scorpiorising, thank you both for your comments. Rest assured, I no longer want her in my life and I am going to take back my power!

        Since reading everyone’s positivity and galvanising words it truly made me think that as long as I allow Leo Lady to have a hold on me, it’ll wear me down completely and I have been through so much in life to be put down by such a negative and ultimately weak person. I’ve always thought her actions in all this were base and completely inexplicable but I never saw her as a weak person until reading everyone’s posts.

        At this moment in time, the way I see things is that it doesn’t matter what had happened back then so long as I can not allow it to affect me now. Thank you for being a part of that process xx

  3. I have a couple of extra questions before I can properly attempt to assist:

    1) How much is the Leo Lady’s actions and your feeling towards them an over hang from teen stuff? She sounds remarkably threatened by you. Who goes out of their way to humiliate some one they don’t give two shits about. (Honey, if you didn’t matter she is sure investing a lot of time in you)

    2) This is a hard one (to write and to think about). Are you a rebound lady that Aqua knows will give him the attention he needs to get over Leo Lady or did the plan of the unstoppable Leo get foiled as he realised that, through your letters, you were truer, more real than what’s-her-face. In which case, don’t fret about your feelings/writing being read out, as they were clearly beautifully written.

    Good that you got rid of Miss Catty. Who the hell needs someone that futile in their lives, eh?

    • I agree with Venus a-go-go. Yes, if Miss Leo didn’t feel threatened she wouldn’t have to stoop so low. But even if things are great with Mr. aqua, there is also no need to feel like second best.

      As long as he is not bringing up the ex then the problem isn’t with him. It’s maybe with your ability to let go of her

      • Venus-a-go-go (love the name) and Whimsygarden, I would like to thank you for your response to this post. I don’t know why she would be threatened by me at all; she is a highly intelligent, physically attractive and wealthy young woman. She has a supportive family and a huge network of friends too.

        From an astrological sense, whilst I do not know her time of birth, thus not knowing her moon/ASC, it is grand trine central, with Jupiter/Pluto opposition and Mercury/Pluto square.So I can see there is an element of needing to control and dominate and maybe somehow I am setting this off?

        As for the rebound comment, I must admit, when I wrote this email to Mystic, bleary-eyed at stupid o’clock at night/in the morning, I must admit that was one of the things that crossed my mind. Am I the Ms Right Now? Is he only with me because he craves the love and affection he knows I am likely to give to him? But I don’t know, it doesn’t feel rebound-like. And like I said, there’s a history and this was on the cards a while ago but never happened due to life getting in the way.

        Either way, I am happy now and being with him makes me happy so I should screw my head on and stop thinking about past circumstances when they are exactly where they belong; in the past.

        Thank you for providing some clarity!

        • Hang on uno momento and re-read your first paragraph: ‘I don’t know why she would feel threatened by me at all…[list of her attributes].’

          You’ve made the transition with your work and your flatmate, but you may also need to keep with the transition with yourself. What makes you special/fantastic – not as a partner to someone, but as you? What are your achievements? This isn’t about taking back your power – although I agree there is part of that – but finding and acknowledging your power and your unique fabulousness.

          then, you can appreciate why Mr Aqua is with you and enjoy your relationship with him for what it is.

  4. Shes not worth it. Dont waste your time. If you are happy with Mr Aqua, thats all that matters. He will see thru her if he is worthy of you. xx

  5. whoa. That Leo is poison, and I don’t mean the Christian Dior perfume that I still secretly like. Alarm bells went off everywhere: Insecurity!! Boundlessly selfish!! Clearly incapable of thinking for herself and finding her own lovers (yet *you* obviously have excellent taste)!! Complete and utter disrespect for you!!!

    Make a little wax doll to represent her (use black candle wax when it is still soft), carve her name in it while you focus on the shit that goes on between you and how you feel, then melt it while you repeat something (say, 3 or 9 times) like
    “This doll *her name* be,
    and from *name* I am now free.
    She vanishes from my life forever and I am in peace,
    my loves are my loves
    and they see her as a freak”

    or something like that, I don’t know. whatever you need to happen.
    also add ‘for the good of all, harming none’ you know.. witchy disclaimer.

    I tried something like that when I was trying to deal with someone at work who had it in for me, got some pretty out-there results [many yrs ago] .

    If the aqua is being enigmatic, …… I don’t know, if some bitch-face non-friend had shagged him and COMPLETELY broken my trust, fuq I would be having it out with this guy that’s for sure. Christ almighty what a bitch. Sorry, I can’t get past that behaviour, it reminds me of the libran Scorpio frenemy.

    better go drink some camomile tea and calm the F down now. lolol

    • oh and make sure you break the melted wax apart, wrap it up with some old rubbish, maybe a few rusty nails, and a crack or two of black pepper to hasten the process, then bin it asap or bury it. Better if you can watch it disappear in the garbage truck! Let the rest of the candle burn down too.

      Is this wierd that I am suggesting all this, not sure. But it does sound like there’s psychic residue around this Aqua man regardless. Do it on a dark moon for extra banishing power.

      In your little incantation maybe include something about her true nature being revealed to all, you know

        • hahaha DL. don’t worry, you’re safe. Plus, I am too lazy (and know a bit more about life and fuqwits) to feel like I need to resort to that stuff these days!
          But seriously, that other chick is b.a.d. n.e.w.s right? and one might want to consider doing everything possible to get her as far from one’s existence as possible.
          Mind you this could be a kneejerk response after a phase in my life of being ultra-fuqed-with by a psychotically insecure jealous shrew.

          Personally I wouldn’t have touched the Aqua after he had been tainted by the leo non-friend either, they can both go to hell as far as I’d care.

          Don’t know what it is with me lately. Maybe mars now in my 3rd house, making me a bit … psycho.

          *calms down a bit*

        • I don’t know, maybe. it’s not intended to harm by any means: just remove them and their influence out of one’s life while one regathers and focuses..whatever is nec . always important to want the highest good for all

      • thanks for posting this – synchronicity: it was playing on the radio today when i was having peaceful time out in the second hand shop. still a bit venus turning, here :)

  6. I don’t want to seem like one of those over-sensitive peeps who have turned the comments into a bit of s#%t storm in the past few days, but I would like to make a small objection to the term ‘Leo personified’ being used to name someone so nasty, selfish and vindictive.
    I hope Little Fish is merely referring to her rival’s appearance and apparent charisma rather than intimating that Leo women generally treat other women like this or behave in such callous ways towards men.
    Leos, in general, are very loving even when we seem to be so very up ourselves. And when we love with all our hearts we light up rooms.
    God, I really am being up myself.
    Despite this objection, Little Fish, good luck. I have no advice at hand, but I hope you work out what is best for you.
    Love and blessings.

    • Is it right to say though that even leos we love, need everything to be all about them? Maybe I need to re-read the hi-lo, though. My comment is based on a lover and a good friend.

    • are you serious ? its responses like this that give leos that rep. Hey, its not about you, OK ?

      • Sorry, I was sort of being silly. I am totally not offended at all. Maybe I am being all about myself but it’s not what I intended. I totally understand the many faults that Leos have and I laugh at myself – most of the time – for having such faults. Hence my use of the words ‘small objection’.

      • Actually, now that I’ve read what I wrote, I kind of feel like you are over-reacting just a tad. I feel I put in enough to suggest that I was being mostly facetious.

    • Doll, you can’t be all like that when the sign at the end of question is the highlighter over the merde traits of that one in 12 thing. I am a scorpio and would not object to an entire post of plutonian hardship as long as it was not “all of that sign is blah”- which is missing the entire point of astrology as we all have individual choices how to act. Everyone has the right to vent the past, this chick is playing her sunsign in amazingly low form let’s face it. And considering the hardship not at all nasty about her!

      Of course Leo is awesome. Just not this one.

      • Hey, just to clarify, the Leo Personified wasn’t meant to be a dig at Leos at all so sorry if it came across that way. It was just because she has a mane of hair, possesses a really regal and refined demeanour and slinks about like a kitty. Plus she has a stellium in Leo. It seemed like an appropriate name to give her without giving her actual name so sorry if I offended anyone! xx

  7. Some people really put the giant F in friend, don’t they. I’m presuming you’ve dumped her. Though i see her imapct on your self esteem is still huge, as it would be when you’ve shared a friendship, and been that trusting and open.

    Which of them told you about the reading of your letters? If she, then par for the course, from the rest of her vicious behaviour. If he, you might see that as his willingness to be open with you. Because you need openness and tender honesty from your man, especially now that you’ve got trust issues after a bad friendship, knowing the connection Leo and Aqua once had.

    He should be able to understand that. You could try to let him know, as plainly and succinctly as you can, without tears, complaining or reproach, that you’d like to discuss how you’re feeling and ask some questions (if that’s what you want to do). If he can’t do that then i’m not saying he’s a bad guy or anything’s wrong with him, but he’s not the kind you need. Your man should be someone you LOVE spending time with, not something you have. I’ve never had a man; i’ve shared their company. Maybe think of it that way?

    You also need to do some work on that self esteem, girl. You’ve every right to appreciate yourself and shine as you are. So go work out what you need to do to get with a new program. Good friends, decent people, great activities just for you sometimes, maybe counsellor (i like that one personally cos i get terrific perspective i can trust). Go enjoy the book MM suggested. Spend a little time with and for yourself as often as you can. Don’t chase an enigma. You’re worth revelation.

    • You are worth the effort it will take.

      If you don’t feel that you are, then get to work and spend as much time and money and energy as you can to MAKE yourself worth it in your eyes. You’ve got the perfect astro climate for it!

    • here here mille – excellent advice – get rid of her, give him the benefit of the doubt and talk !! good luck (double pisces, quadruple virgo 7th house stellium – ie i can relate!)

      • Milleunanotte, thank you so much for dispensing such awesome advice. “Don’t chase an enigma, you’re worth a revelation” – those words really spoke to me. So simple yet so powerful.

        I am going to work on my self esteem; it’s truly not as bad as this post makes me out to be but I know it’s an issue I need to work on nonetheless. And I have started investing more time in being by myself too and I have found it has been beneficial to me. Thank you for showing me kindness and giving such useful advice. xx

  8. I am not usually moved to write back to these letters (not in a mean way) but something about your wording of this letter (which everyone seems to be picking up on) is indicative of the power dynamic that is not totally clear

    Eg, I cannot tell about the timeframe Mr Aquarius was with the Leo and then to you, if he is solidly with you nor if he is acknowledged in his role in all this and so on

    I also think Mystic is onto it here as most Aqua’s I know would never laugh at anyone like that, nor most men, It’s a bitchy teenage girl thing to do. Can you imagine her crapping on and he silently horrified at her whilst she displays her true colours? more likely scenario, lets face it. Don’t take her word for it, sounds like the oscars is the soundtrack every time she opens her mouth.

    Also, when this was mentioned, how did you not punch her in the face?

    What made me want to reply is that I had a real problem with a Leo femme that did my head in for years. Admittedly, this was my very early years but it was an important lesson that I never forgot and now I don’t do those power dynamics. She was extremely immature and fed off drama and crap etc. There were many examples of life sabotage but I finally got rid of her when circumstances allowed. Then cut her right out. But I realised that she was competing with me so hard as I had not come into my power yet. My crappy upbringing and lack of esteem support had forged a hole that was letting retards like this in. She hated my power and wanted to destroy it as that is what made her feel good. Any Leo worth their mane would just haute it to nab the best of the best and not bother with such games because they had their eye on the prize. Insecure Lions are some of the most painful people on the planet. Let her stupidity remind you of the power she chooses to fuq with. My point is that you have your own power and your own hotness that is worth it’s weight in GOLD. Looks are one thing but as I scorpio I want to talk about power, if you don’t nurture and value that like its the most expensive thing you own on the planet then drama capitalists will pop a straw into your aura and drink, like your playground leo ex girl here. Own it.

    Then when you have addressed those boundaries you can assess whether Mr Aquarius is the man meant to be by your side or another lesson in the net of your mermaid self

    Sex and flattery is one thing but if you are going to partner up make sure he is solid for you, absolutely no point in this day and age otherwise. You can get a bank account now, you are not part of a cattle and land scheme ala 1700s. Able to make choices our ancestors would die of envy from. Make the most of those decisions :) xx

    • That’s funny, Ms. I don’t often have much to say to these dilemmas either. The power drain got me, too.

      • great post ms – another lesson in the net of your mermaid self – * sigh*. wise advice too re coming into your power and ‘the hole’. have just gone through this with tyrannical female friend from high school. 10 years ago i fled away from it but this time i’ve stood my ground and not taken the crap. this has all played out with venus retro these last few months plus saturn transiting my 8th. she’s crab btw.

    • “Looks are one thing but as I scorpio I want to talk about power, if you don’t nurture and value that like its the most expensive thing you own on the planet then drama capitalists will pop a straw into your aura and drink, like your playground leo ex girl here. Own it.”

      Perfectly put!!

    • Fantastic advice.

      Little Fish, do you have any planets in Leo? Maybe your spirit/self/soul wants to incorporate elements of the haute Leo energy into your life, but isn’t sure how to go about it or is afraid to own it. Thus it’s playing out as low Leo in the form of this (former?) friend.

      • gbs – I was thinking the same thing. I used to attract/be attracted to Leo women and ended up marrying a Leo man. None of those relationships were really a good fit for me. Now, I realize it was my Leo moon wanting to shine.

        • Thank you Ms, just thank you for such an elegant and powerful post. Believe me, I was so close to assaulting her! When I confronted her about the letters, it took all of my might not to completely lose my shit and give her the slap she deserved!

          But asides from that; the place you’re at right now, past the femme drama, that’s where I want to be right now. I’m reiterating what I said a few posts before but whats become so evident in this thread is how much power I was placing on her effect on me and my relationships. This is probably a naive and simplistic way of looking at things but whilst I can’t deny or ignore Lady Lady’s past with Mr Aquarius, its in the past. It’s never been about him making me feel second best, that was all my own doing because I placed an importance on her that rightfully wasn’t hers. So I am going to carry on seeing where things go with Aqua and if it doesn’t work out, then it doesn’t work out. But thank you, Ms for your contribution. I need to start owning and appreciating those quintessential qualities that make me, Me xx

          Also GBS and 12th House Virgo, I don’t actually have any planets in Leo.

          However, my ASC is 29Can so Leo makes up the majority of my first house. Also, and I can’t believe this wasn’t the first thing I did when I looked up my synastry between me and Leo Lady… Her Lilith is 29deg Cancer – so I’m forever the Madonna to her Whore? xx

          • I feel compelled to put my two cents in…Too much damn Uranus conjunct my Sun..

            I think it’s time to Aries up.
            Pull out whatever fire sign you have and WORK it.

            ASK him what happened with the letters. TELL him how you felt about that shiite with the Leo Loser.

            He is your fella, yes?

            Boys have to listen to girls feelings.

            If he slips, slides or otherwise disappears… you have a clearer feeling of how this is gonna go.

            If he shows you some respect or transparency, work with him.

  9. Probably a terrible double standard on my part, but I could not accept sloppy seconds.

    Just way too late for him in my view.

    Get a nice fresh clean one. One who Liked you, courted you, won you. No doubt.

    • exactly, show yourself some respect, then others can return the favour.

    • True. The diva in me would not want to share anything that had been near her venomous orifices. Damaged goods. Fresh is always best.

        • the song – Why’d you do it? – by Marianne Faithfull – always good to have a copy for times such as these…

    • Agree. The whole situation is tainted by her and I don’t think you’ll ever really feel at peace if you stay with him.

    • yes. other than my slightly unbalanced rant above, I do agree. it is hard to know exactly what the vibe is with you and the aqua tho.

      • Couldn’t agree more – I don’t take cast-offs from nasty bitches, whatever their Sun, same way I cut the so-called “friend” who decided to have it off with my “I want to get back together” Ex. Same for him, too.

        The old ones are often the truest – there are plenty of other fish in the sea, blah, blah, blah – wouldn’t it be lovely to be with someone without any residual bad vibes, questions, etc? You deserve better than this situation. xo

    • but isn’t this terribly presumptuous? What if Mr Aqua got sucked into the Leo’s Vortex of Leonity and got blinded for the moment, just like how Little Fish did so long ago… Both of them made a mistake by letting her into their lives at all.

      Basically, either they’re equally as stupid (absolutely no offence meant, btw) OR Mr Aqua is a bigger idiot if he ever did look down on Little Fish. So…it all depends on where he lies. Either she finds it in her to forgive him for making the same mistake she did or she (very rightly) kicks him out of her life for being an asshole. But if she really likes the guy, then it would be stupid to kick him on of her life because her pride was bruised….IF he was a good person the whole time.
      …..which is probably what she meant by him being an enigma? I guess what I’m saying is that IF he’s really worth it, even if you’re not sure about his view on things, give him another chance- but keep your eyes on him for more misdemeanors. He might just be worth it.

      • UNLESS LF feels like going for a bigger person that would be able to see through the Leo. In which case, dump his ass!

  10. Thanks LF for sharing.

    If you feel like he is an enigma, it could be that he’s not making you happy.

    But if he really is making you happy in that larger sense but for the fact that he hasn’t raised the subject of his conversations with her about you, then you need to talk to him about that. Aquas when they really love and feel safe are not that enigmatic.

    If there relationship is genuinely there, it will survive and thrive, even if he did chortle. But, by fuq I’d hope he’s grown up a bit since then.

    My gut response though is something that starts out of such toxicity/insecurities is not long term, but a blessed life lesson.

  11. Sorry but I’m troubled by Mr. Aqua. , seems he will just go to the highest bidder, and your whole vibe seems a touch wingey ? sorry, I wouldn’t have anything to do with either of them. If a woman behaved as he has between me and another male associate I wouldn’t be within cooeee of either of them. I think in the longer term you will be better off without both of them.

    • I am chuckling sorry only because I could not think of anything more Aries. So Aries :)

      • Go the Ariesarchy.

        When someone loves you you’re like a contented cat. You don’t need to get whingey or write to an astrologer about it.

        • exactly. You dont need or want any validation from anyone if you’re happy with someone.

      • Right on, DavidL!

        By them laughing at your emotions before you had anything to do with him, and you not getting rid of them when you found out, you had already condoned the fact that you approved of his pre emotive betrayal. Not to mention hers.

        RUN from them both.

        You’ve fixed every other part of your life, fix this! : )

        Sorry if I sound harsh but my Aries moon does not negotiate with (emotional) terrorists.

      • I resemble that remark ! :)

        What’s in a name? that which we call a rose
        By any other name would smell as sweet.

        • Now I’m a mutable all over and am ever ready to pick over the pieces and see if there’s anything worth putting back together.

          But babe, the comments above are spot-on. Get away from her, she’s hideous and poisonous and not a friend at all.

          And then get away from him. Don’t do it to yourself. You sound quite young, if you are, there’s years ahead of you, years of brilliant, beautiful men that care about YOU, and have not been got at by your utter bitch of a (non)friend

          My suggestion would be to dump both of them, to tell them why, and to simply cut contact. Then go out with yourself for as long as it takes for you to learn what is beautiufl and powerful and sexy about you.

          Because like attracts like, and liking yourself is the most powerful way to attract someone who will like you just as much.

    • Mr Aqua and Miss Leo strike me as characters in Cruel Intentions. fuq them both. I’d leave and never look back.

  12. Omg. I cannot not comment- what a bitch!! I cannot bare women like this über Leo whatever! No excuse go behavior like that. I feel for you!
    Virgo sympathy…

  13. Zap zone them both and start completely fresh.
    A friend ‘went after ‘ a relationship of long standing a few years ago, when it came up to the surface to be seen, I got rid of two a**holes at the same time.
    A very refreshing and empowering experience, since I knew I couldn’t ever be sure about him again!!

  14. Hmmmm… Dangerous Liasons for two people playing games against a third…. Especially the letter writing!

    And here I am always going on about how no one writes proper letters any more…

    • Ah sweetie! What part of your chart loves the letter writing do you think? Would it be some libra or virgo?

      • Sun, Mercury, Mars in Virgo in the 5th and beautifully artistic crazy Uranus in Libra?

        Don’t you just love a gorgeous hand written letter?

        Love texts (euphemism, I do know the modern slang) not quite the same!

        • Yes I do. Textured fancy paper is even better, and real ink from a pen that had a nib, maybe…

  15. Seems that Aquaman is a classic re-bound scenario.

    Otherwise known as the “crazy maker” after the “long term lover” phase.

    It is the relationship that you have after this one that deserves your effort.

    I say this because i am having a great time with a lover who had the re-bound after the five year marriage…..before she met me.

    Fabulous !

  16. Anyone ready for a moratorium on LoveZombie-ism? And a moving-on-ium to something empowering?

    • Yes, please! Can we please talk about art / creating / self expression?

      Please don’t laugh but since I have started collage with a question in mind I’ve discovered the collage never lies!

      And I feel a lot better, more internal resources / coping mechanisms.

      • I’m there. My venus is more about direction and investment myself, more to the point my MC is zapping me to the point all I can think about is manifesting better

    • Nope…I’m just getting into Charlton Heston mode a la Last Man on Earth…”Goddam zombies” …kching kching kching..
      Oops , sorry wrong movie , but you get my drift.
      ….goddam monkeys…kching …kching..kching..

  17. Another possibility is that Leo bitch picked up on his interest for you so made up the crap re sharing what you had said/written about him etc.. Low Leos hate the spot light taken off them so that’s a real possibility I think.

    As an Aquarian I don’t think he would give two hoots about the triangle thing. He may have been drawn to her “look at me, look at me” vibe like a Magpie does shinny stuff but once the curiosity has waned then he’s off for authentic relating maybe? Also, re not getting him entirely, I think that’s just because he’s Aqua and you never really will most likely.

    Best of luck.

  18. 😯

    I just wanna know if they play this song in Love Zombie Rehab? 😯

    (Btw I think Ms. and Mystic NAILED IT!)

  19. i was once friends with a gemini who did this kind of man snatch business first to a toro, then to me, only to have her scheming usurped by an aries who very thoroughly obliterated her from the power map for a while. it was low behaviour. and not determined by the sign but by the character.

    i think if you want to leave then there is a good reason behind it. whether thats intuition telling you he’s wrong or it just being bad timing – your inner self needing room to grow and flourish after feeling stomped on. if Aqua man cares he will show his true colours. As any worthy man would.

    • I agree Aqua, it’s not a sun sign thing but a character trait. And any man with integrity will surely display his worth.

      I had a Capricorn sun sign friend in my late teens early 20’s who performed this stunt on 3 of my guys. Two really mattered and one not so much but by the time the 3rd incident completed they were both dust. Misplaced loyalty is how I will describe my own inability to ditch initially. The 3rd was a casual interest that she knew of and knew we were somewhat involved. She expressed interest and I do not fight for affections so when he did also I just had to accept but asked that they be somewhat considerate of my feelings. The very next time we’re out social they sit opposite me at a pub and start snogging. Kaboom. You’re gone. The unfortunate irony in this one is that her long term partner (yessss, she had one!!) had tried it on me numerous times but I would not go there even though there was a chemistry because it wasn’t right in my mind.

      The next was a Kataka sun in my late 20’s and she went for several unsuccessfully but systematically (??) including such antics as physically standing between me and prospective love interest batting eyes etc (I’m rolling mine) and it all ended when I awoke on morning after a night out to find one of my casuals in her bed!! Er.. that’d be see ya to both. They both tried to get back in my good books and he turned out to be a psycho who locked her in the house and even had to watch and make sure she went to the toilet when she said she was. I was called by her sister to assist and do hostage negotiations. I was fairly confident it wasn’t that extreme and more of a weird interplay between the two so advised I was fully booked out in the middle east. The irony there is she possibly saved my butt so no point being miffed at what was a lucky break for me.

      I know Caps and Kataka since and that’s not typical behaviour of them at all so more astro would be needed but then sometimes it’s just a distorted self view and a whole swag of other issues. We can’t always blame it on the moon 😉 There is choice.

      • you’re spot on. “misplaced loyalty” is the perfect summary of why we let it continue.

  20. Crikey what a conumdrum. As an Aquarius with Leo Moon and Venus in Pisces (in a relationship with an Aquarian) I’m boing boinging all over the shop on this one. Dear Little Fish, I feel Ms is right about power. Own it, don’t give it away especially to a frenemy nemesis. And Suddenly Leo and Fallen Angel have the goods going on with some radiantly perceptive advice. Personally I cannot possibly imagine an Aquarian chortling over another person’s personal letters. The many Aquarians I know would feel repulsed at the thought of, let alone doing, such a thing. I think this is said frenemy’s spin on things and you have fallen for the bait hook, line and sinker. I also don’t want to be harsh but you say “Now I have him”… and yet it is patently obvious that you really think she still has him. It appears your insecurity is making this thing a competition with her. Haven’t you dissed her? She’s game. wicket, stumps, over. Done, dusted, past. So what’s the problem in the now, truly? Aquarians can’t handle this type of competitive angst about exes. And believe me, they sense it even if it remains unspoken. So don’t go for sabotage if Mr Aquaman is the one for you. Good luck and get your radically secure, in the now, awesomeness on! XX

    • Btw Iris AquaCat, SO spot on about Aquas, YES this is a violation of the Rules of Urania & Love for All Mankind!!

      I have Moon in Aqua and personally, find it indeed appalling, not to mention so disgustingly lacking in original, independent appeal AND content to have to rely on shaming someone else as a method of seduction. That Leo needs to get her head shaven and shunned by the pack pronto.

      The essence of Leo isn’t about detracting from others but opening that great heart space to let the light, whether one’s own or another’s, shine brightly.

      Yes yes to getting radically secure! :)

  21. I say dump them both – if your relationship with Mr. Aqua was that good there would be no doubt. And you don’t need her in your life! Evolve (or evaporate) x

  22. So she’s competing with you –

    As horrible as this is – so horrible – thing to remember is she is ONLY bothering because she (sadly) sees you as a threat somehow – otherwise there would be no sense of satisfaction for her in her victory. So what are all those things she finds threatening? You have to focus on those things – how magnificent YOU obviously are – and stop hiding them away or playing them down for any reason. SHINE FORTH FISHY!!

    I bet you are a fantastic, sensitive, beautiful, obviously self aware and intelligent, shiny, mesmerising, creative fish. Jump out of the pond for a bit and see your own reflection clearly. Do whatever you need to do to feel fantastic about yourself. Follow your bliss and if you wanna stay with Aqua work with him so you feel really secure in your relationship. Leo has taught you a lot – use it for your own fantastic benefit. Now it’s time to focus on your fabulous self. There will always be people who challenge us, but if you’re truly happy in yourself – living authentically you – it doesn’t have to take over our lives/sanity. As soon as you discover what that authentic reality is for you… you’ll just feel like the luckiest person on earth. 😉 I wish you lots of luck Fishy Fish. xx

  23. Ugh, I can so relate to this piece. I can’t write enough right now but I just wanted to participate. 2 drama queens in my life poking their fuq’d up interpretation of things and just can’t deal with them anymore. Anyway.. I can’t wait to have time to read the entire thread.

    I wish the person who sent the email to Mystic well!! :)

    • WOW.. after reading what I wrote and reading a couple of threads I just realized that the 2 I am referring to are both Aries. A couple of days apart from each other. I apologize for Aries on this thread.. I just thought it weird they both are Aries. I am a Virgo.. maybe I just don’t fit with them. Any way…

  24. Reminds me of the time an girlhood “frien” of mine went on and on about some guy she was into. This was in pre-cellphone days and she had her own phone line in her room. Can’t recall her sign but if there were a 13th sign of Daddy Issues it would be her. Anyway – she plays her messages and her supposed live object asked if I would be around. I never realized when/what guys liked me. And my “friends” did their best to keep me in the dark. Are you pre Saturn return? In any case, nothing here sounds love zombie at all. You sound like you value the flaunting quality of the Leo even though you are being given evidence that it isn’t what guys are into. Up the self-love.

  25. The last time anyone did this to me I was fifteen, and she was one of my best friends. It was horrible, but I learned to see the situation for what it was: a girl threatened by me, which seemed bizarre because according to school hierarchy, she was the hot girl who got the guys, and I was the plain girl who never did. It taught me to see myself a different way.

    Granted a few posts ago I outed myself as a recovering love zombie, but if it were me I couldn’t be with a man who had been with that ‘friend’. It would feel very Melrose Place. I would move on, let him work VERY hard to win me, if indeed I hadn’t found another by then. I have a Cap moon-Lilith-Eros-Juno conjunction and it does not like to be fuqed with :)

    • “Melrose Place”. So apposite! And yes, totally agree with making him work hard. BTW Cappi Moon people are impossibly, ravishingly attractive IMO… the don’t fuq with me factor is sexy as all get-up. I’m yet to meet a Cappi Moon (having 7last count in my close family, friends and ex-lovers circle) who doesnt vibe “fuq with me” in the best possible way :-)

  26. There’s a quite simple solution – talk to Mr Aqua and clear the air. Ask him what went on, tell him you need clarity, dish the dirt on your ex-friend and tell him what she told her. Ask him what his response was. Be up front. Be powerful. Be honest with him instead of stewing (I can do a mean stew myself so I can ID them like a missile honing in on its target). And if plain talking doesn’t get the truth out of Mr Aqua, ditch him. Remember your self-respect!

    • AR ~ the Greek climate MUST be agreeing with you. Lovely pic of you beaming out at me. Seems so long since I’ve seen you around here. Hope all is blissful among the Gods. All I have is my heritage and a piece of rock from Olympus on my nightstand but you are there!! xx

    • Hear. Hear! Love your name… but jeez you sure channel Pallas Athena as wel,l you Goddess of wisdom , courage and inspiration! XX

    • Oh, thank you so much, Scorched Earth and Iris Aquacat, what gorgeous comments – big, big hugs to you both. I really love it here, feel so much at home. My husband says I look much happier, and I’m smiling and laughing more. I can’t believe how happy I am! xxx

      • Am relieved to find you good and well LL…(Lovely Libran for those not familair) x

      • You are positively glowing and the energy emanates from your smile.

        Happy days.. and happy for you!!


  27. I think you should ask him what happened when he read your letters. How did he feel about that? He may be a complete asshole; he may be a darling, but one thing is for sure — not too many men have seen the inside of your psyche as deeply as that.

    Ask him. it could be that the reason he’s with you is because he read what you wrote. Wouldn’t that be great? You’ll never know unless you ask.

    • I *will* figure this out, regardless if somebody lends a sister a hand or not.

      • It’s the “youtube” part doll…

        When you are in a window with the music video..just “copy” and then paste to your post..I don’t know, if you did that…still don’t know why…never the less…

        Love her btw..

        • Hilar in so many ways…just picked some things up..I didn’t even own a computer until 2003..

          Aqua doc who save my life (he is gone from this world bless his heart), asked “when are you gonna get with the 21st Century?)

          Was trying 😯

          • Hey thanks for hooking me up, sweetpea! :)

            Yeah, I did the copy and paste code to embed, and then I tried the “old” (?) embed code, too, and still I got what I got. Am using latest Firefox and Windows 7: maybe it’s something to do with browser &/or os? Who knows.


            Thank You! xo

            • I can’t decide which is my fave: the nickel bag lady, or the booty bag lady… 😉

  28. Keep it simple. Follow your heart. But listen to what your heart ir reason saying. It will grow with you and every new experience you have. Nobody really knows how things will work out, life is trial and error and we are lucky to have the luxury of that.

  29. Oops, confounded touch pads, that was meant to read: listen to what your heart is really saying… It sometimes tells us things we don’t want to hear, and it comes out in our writing… I think you actually know what to do.

  30. What an awesome place to come to for advice.. So many responses, very cool. The fact he read/listened to your letters is very troubling. If he didn’t want to participate, he would have told you about her reading them and him refusing to listen. In a perfect world he would have been very turned off by that immature, mean girl behaviour, and it would have contributed to him leaving her.

    You sound like a really amazing, intelligent, interesting, introspective woman and you deserve a really great situation with a really great man. One without the cloud of that other bitch. But, if he is treating you well and you are happy, the cloud may blow over. Take care of yourself and do what you feel in your gut, when your gut figures it out. xoxoxxo

  31. Okay, take it from the not-really-recently heartbroken… If you have to ask your questions, you already know the answer.

    When you say you feel “second-best,” you mean you feel like a rebound. My Cancer ex had a rebound – with a whitetrash name (Jessy Lianne, I kid you not), a cute nineteen-year-old Capricorn who was twitty arm candy he could play dress-up with (They met while doing a Rocky Horror Picture Show performance, which he apparently does every weekend for the last 6 months.) My point is, she told herself that I was nothing more than an ex and didn’t matter. Which would be ordinarily true, if he hadn’t decided to rub her existence in my face while simultaneously telling me he only planned on being with her for a month, as he “knew it was bad” that she wasn’t getting an education – but which really meant she had a month to make him love her, as it only took us two weeks for that. Get it? She had a month to show she was better than me in his heart, and she failed. (Also, he broke up with me and I’d NEVER bragged about anything in my life, which makes him treating it like a competition… kinda weid.)

    Now… Why that long-winded story?

    Because she should have known she was a rebound when he flat-out told her he wanted to “take it slow” as he’d just gotten out of a big relationship six months before. That he mentioned my past existence at all, AND as a reason to keep her at bay.

    What does this have to do with YOU?

    Because you know her story. Hell, you know THEIR story. I’m sure he does like you, honestly, but the only way you don’t feel like a rebound is if you get the self-respect to not keep banging her castoffs. And when a Leo ditches a man, he’s a castoff. (When an Aries does it, he’s basically an orphan…) If you know their story, and you feel like a rebound? Congrats, because you probably are. Think you’re doing zombie love? Probably are. Dead relationship? Probably.

    You don’t trust him, but you’ve wanted him for the longest time so you’re trying to tell yourself that it can be fixed. Some suspicions, if they can be solved at all, need space and communication. I get that you want to respect him, and you do want him, but you aren’t some clueless nineteen-year-old bimbo who desperately wants a boyfriend. You don’t need a man to save you, you’ve said it yourself. So if you don’t trust this guy or your relationship…

    Cut her out of your life entirely. Voodoo her out. Exorcise her. Tell him how you feel, as it doesn’t seem as though you have. (Afraid of his response?) And next time you date someone, make sure they have no connection her whore self. <3

  32. Wow, you guys, thank you so much for your responses! I am moved by everyone’s advice and once I have written this main piece, I will take some time out to reflect on all the snippets of wisdom everyone has dispensed. Thank you! So this is Little Fish from the big ol’ moan above. I guess I should probably clarify my thoughts in a clear manner because some things aren’t translating right.

    When I say I have Mr Aquarius, I say it in the sense that neither he nor I are dating anyone else and have agreed it that fact. It’s exclusive.We’re together. We go on dates and do the horizontal with one another and share in each other’s successes and losses. It’s all very new, as in 2 months new but I think I have come to the turning point in my thoughts that if I can’t reconcile how I feel about this situation, then I have to let him go now.

    We’ve known each other for years however. When Mr Aquarius and I met, there was a spark but it just never fell into place for various reasons. Then I met my on-off toxic ex and he got involved in what turned into a batsh*t insane relationship so the spark fizzled and we became friends. It should be easy reading him but if anything, its harder because the guy he is in our social circle is so different when it comes to relationships. It sounds silly but there is an incredible depth to him that he rarely allows to shine in front of everyone; he instead likes to channel that easy, happy-go-lucky vibe so when those layers are revealed, it hits your core.

    He is still an enigma to me in the sense that I don’t think he finds it easy expressing his emotions. I find that hard because I’m the complete opposite and obviously he knows how I feel. It was literally spelled out for him… But he does try. The other week, aided by a lot of whiskey, he compared me to oxygen; an elemental force that was transforming and vital and an essential part of his being. It took me a while to realise that he was paying me a (drunken) compliment. But every time I compliment him or flirt with him, he retreats. And I don’t think I am coming on too strong but then I fool myself into thinking that maybe I am scaring him away because he has seen the letters!

    I found out about the letters through him but it was her that said it was amusement. I know, I know, I shouldn’t believe her! But this is a man who is at the epicentre of the social scene; he knows everyone and always has something going on. And yet when he was with her, no one heard anything from him and when he did make an appearance, he was so cold with me at that point, it physically hurt.

    So I wrote things down in my journal to figure things out and keeping up with a tradition we had from years gone by, I penned letters to her for advice because I thought she was my friend and I valued her opinion. One of the first conversations I had with the Leo Lady was that we loved receiving something in the post other than bills. The end of that day, we exchanged addresses not numbers. I am aware of how twee that sounds so forgive me!

    Aquarius and I had a conversation about Leo Lady, not an indepth one admittedly but I think it needs to happen soon. He said that Leo Lady always used to ask him about his feelings for me. Mr Aquarius admitted we had a connection between us but for some reason it never worked out and that he accepted it and I was in the past. Then apparently that was when she brought out the letters and read them at him. I’ve never asked him about his reaction to my letters because in many ways, I am still scared to because it means both of us confronting what was said in them.

    Mr Aquarius broke up with Leo in January which is when I found out about them dating in the first place. He dated a few girls since then but none of them worked out. He admitted that he spent a long time pining over Leo Lady but that he doesn’t think about her now and I believe him. He doesn’t bring her up or compare me to her or anything like that; that’s my own self doing. And I knew before writing this post that its something I need to focus on, irrespective of this situation.

    I have to also clarify that the guys in the past she has swooped from under my nose weren’t guys I had been involved with in the sense that I was with Mr Aquarius. They were just guys I fancied that I saw in a club or met at uni and guys who I never got involved with once they’d gone there. At least back then she was honest about it, it was easier to let go. It’s the secrecy and the betrayal in this situation that bugs me because whilst she was acting like my cheerleader, encouraging me to date again and find a good guy, a guy like Mr Aquarius, she was sleeping with him.

    I’m going to go through the posts now cos there are a lot of things people have said and suggested that I want to reflect on. Thank you once again for taking the time out to contribute to this thread with your words of wisdom and thank you, Mystic for taking the time out to read through my email and post it in the first place. You’ve all given me lots to think about.

    LF xx

    • Little Fish, so glad you’re taking time to process the gifts of our little astro commune, I can definitely appreciate you shedding more light on the situation.

      Some things.. One, perhaps consider the possibility of Mr. Aqua’s moment of coldness as influenced by the Jealous Leo’s machinations. Reading you, I realize now that you’re more the soul of open-heartedness and being so, tend not to quickly see how deeply vile certain people can be. That’s a gift IMO and I hope this apparition will serve more as a reminder that not everyone is like you rather than having that ability for innocence ebb away.

      Second, aside from the Jealous Leo’s betrayal of your friendship, you may also have lingering feelings of self-doubt i.e. why didn’t you realize who she was, cut her off sooner etc etc. And in that, there needs to be some self-forgiveness, no?

      Certainly she’d delivered a painful lesson (I love what Mille said about her putting the (ef)F in Friend!), but it’s better to have come from a place of faith in humanity rather than not. You’ll meet all sorts of people in your many lives to be as the years go by, and very few are 100% evil or 100% good. You’ll refine how to appropriate yourself to each relationship and more importantly, learn how to trust yourself when someone deliberately disappoints.

      There will always be pain, but we can and do recover. And we can choose what to take from the experience.

      And last, since your relationship has only recently intensified in the last 2 months, is this really an issue that belongs to both you and Mr. Aqua NOW? While we must reconcile the past, I feel there are more your feelings to work thru on this than him?

      I would be concerned that discussing the Jealous Leo at this point would be giving her/the issue too much energy and well, power when this is a time you ought be gratefully sighing into each other’s arms for having finally landed together! While I understand being keen to resolve the issue, keeping the specter alive may also be misconstrued by Mr. Aqua as your not trusting him or what he’s shown you thus far. And it’s going to solidify your insecurity in his eyes – advantage Jealous Leo? I certainly have made plenty of similar mistakes before and I would suggest a think on this one.

      So, as it is almost midnight and I am somewhat Venused myself, I shall rely on the eloquence of another poet to make my appeal thru your literal heart senses, from one fervent flower holding lover to another:

      Woman with Flower
      Noami Long Madgett

      I wouldn’t coax the plant if I were you.
      Such watchful nurturing may do it harm.
      Let the soil rest from so much digging
      And wait until it’s dry before you water it.
      The leaf’s inclined to find its own direction;
      Give it a chance to seek the sunlight for itself.

      Much growth is stunted by too careful prodding,
      Too eager tenderness.
      The things we love we have to learn to leave alone.

  33. Hi little fish!

    Do you know his moon sign/rising sign?

    I have some friends who are aquarian. One who I nearly got involved with but he couldn’t handle my emo 😉 … anyway we are better off friends. But I’m guessing you know Aqua’s are not great with the upfront emo even if they feel it too. But then depending on his moon sign etc – that depth you speak of. I can understand why you are confused.

    My very aqua now friend – has moon opposite sun. It drives me mental (so a LEO moon)… because he SAYS he hates compliments… he pretends to hate it when I get all excited about something like i’m acting naive… but then I can FEEL that the reality is he LOVES it when I give him compliments – he secretly really WANTS to be the centre of attention though he also vocally hates this thing in people… and he secretly loves how excited I get about things. Rolling my eyes now but I love my aqua friend. But thank christ for astrology or he would give me the shits.

    Well.. it’s never boring is it.

    • Hey Gemicorn, I don’t know his time of birth to figure out his ASC but the moon was in Pisces that whole day. However, the Moon is also square his Venus/Uranus conjunction and he is potentially Moon square Saturn too. So that Pisces part of him is never going to be easy for him to express with all those titan planets squaring it but I believe he does try.

  34. Love is never a contest little Fish!
    Sure your naughty ex-pal Leo tried to humilate you by telling the Aqua your feelings, but as long as your feelings are true, what is so wrong with that? She did you a favour without knowing it.
    The Leo might be laughing and poking fun, but the Aqua? naw.
    Most Aqua Menz would be awed (on the inside) with the amount of courage you display with your feelings. You cannot know love without some risk and displaying some vulnerability.
    Just brush off the Leo like dandruff. Move on.
    If the Aqua Man is meant to be, it’ll work out.

    I’d suggest some hypnosis to erase the Leo out of the equation. The less you think of her, the less power she holds over you. She clearly knows she holds a lot of power in your life. It’s time to take it away from her.

  35. Just think you ought be able to ask your guy clearly about what happened re the letters and his response. It isn’t so much about the situation, is the fact that secrecy bothers you and by not confronting this you are enabling the secrecy to continue. The growth, the pivotal point of change, is where the maximum amount of emotional hurt resides.