Another Astro-Gaga Competition

Michelle Williams with Ryan Gosling

Michelle Williams and Ryan Gosling are plugging their new movie Blue Valentine but what i want from you is an astrological caption for this pic please.

Winner gets a year of the Alpha Mystic subscription: Access to all the Scopes, Oracle & the Daily Mystic e-mail to your inbox Mon to Fri.

Soooo  SHE is a multiple conjunct Virgo. Mega. The Ultimate Virgo. HE is a multiple conjunct Scorpio…with loads of planets in Libra. He’s almost prettier than her.

Thoughts?

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Libra Bohemia
Libra Bohemia
December 1, 2010 8:07 pm

Almost prettier…really??

Marla
Marla
September 14, 2010 5:11 am

Beauty Cunningly Attempts To Seduce Time

VirgoFire
VirgoFire
September 14, 2010 3:17 am

Michelle is a Virgo in a state of shock with the new hair color. She is looking for a flaw in platinum perfection but is trying to keep her cool by zenning out on the perfectly red lipstick application that lay on her lips. She is content with that… For now. She is in such shock that she now resembles an ice maiden and her tanned Scorpionic counterpart Ryan is unaware that he may be about to kiss an icy face. Thankfully the coolness of her skin will tame the lusty intentions of Mr Gosling. Who will find it perhaps… Read more »

unpredictable pisces
unpredictable pisces
September 13, 2010 10:40 pm
Reply to  Mystic

congrats h-Bird…I think Lex should be runner-up 😉

Lexicorn
Lexicorn
September 13, 2010 3:42 pm

GOSLING’S NEW LOW
How the Libran Scorpio’s sexual addiction to scented hair products saw co-star drugged and sniffed for 8 days. Virgo survivor reveals how she remained hydrated throughout the ordeal.

Ms.
Ms.
September 13, 2010 4:22 pm
Reply to  Lexicorn

you utterly rock at these Lex

fluidfeline
fluidfeline
September 13, 2010 10:52 pm
Reply to  Lexicorn

fuqing hilarious Lexi! Sorry but this is my winner.

fluidfeline
fluidfeline
September 13, 2010 10:53 pm
Reply to  fluidfeline

And no insult to you Hummingbird – brilliant brevity indeed.

fluidfeline
fluidfeline
September 13, 2010 10:56 pm
Reply to  fluidfeline

And Belgian LS’s was a very poignant whimsical take that had me too. Too much talent here – i love it 🙂

Andromeda
Andromeda
September 14, 2010 4:52 am
Reply to  Lexicorn

Awesome as usual Lexi! 😛

Lexicorn
Lexicorn
September 14, 2010 12:53 pm
Reply to  Lexicorn

Hey guys. Glad you giggled, and lovin’ having a cheer squad!!
Astro GaGa always such a welcomed little distraction in my day.
xx

Bun
Bun
September 13, 2010 2:03 pm

“Underneath the delicate, beautiful exterior lurks predatory danger and a will of steal. Oh, and hes alright, too.”

aqualala
aqualala
September 13, 2010 9:36 am

DERANGED SCORPION CHARGED WITH PUBLIC INDECENCY, FLEES WITH WAX MUSEUM VIRGIN — As police continue their search for young man obsessed with poreless figurine, psychiatrists and family desperate for treatment– “We haven’t been able to reach him,” sobbed Ryan Gosling’s mother. “He won’t even talk to us unless we call him Pygmalion.” Mr. Gosling “abducted” Galatea, a wax figurine, from the Museum of Modern Art’s “Studies in Frozen Virginity” exhibit on Friday, September 10. He is suspected of a shopping mall crime spree including hauls from Victoria’s Secret and Vera Wang. Mr. Gosling was last seen while breaking and entering… Read more »

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 9:38 am
Reply to  aqualala

omg, hilarious!

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 9:39 am
Reply to  Sweetpea

And of course the waxed virgin would be ~breathless!~ hehe

Scorp
Scorp
September 13, 2010 11:16 am
Reply to  aqualala

LOL!

The Leo Socialite
The Leo Socialite
September 13, 2010 8:10 am

The Lorax?

aqualala
aqualala
September 13, 2010 8:35 am

lol

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 8:10 am

Since Ryan Gosling is a Libran in real life and it looks like he could inhale Michelle, I wonder what sign Pepe le Pew is…Wiki says created in 1945 but I didn’t see a month or day (just sorta scanned the info..)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hBFEObtQdM

Pepe also has cartoons called “A Scent of the Matterhorn”, “Scent-imental Romeo”, “Who Scent You”…And a girlfriend named “FiFi le Fume”

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 8:24 am
Reply to  Sweetpea

Okay, well, actually a Scorpio with lots of Libra …

crabby gem
crabby gem
September 13, 2010 7:44 am

If she were programmed to speak, she would say: Help! I am a Libran fembot created to feature in ads for chic Scandinavian furniture and this beautiful but *organic* man is trying to make love to me. I am attracted by his Libran beauty but his earthy and possessive moon in Taurus is alarming my Virgo rising. I fear I may get dirty. Yet, with Libran vaciliation, I cannot resist. I wasn’t programmed for this!

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 7:47 am
Reply to  crabby gem

haha good one

twinfishrising
twinfishrising
September 13, 2010 8:00 am
Reply to  crabby gem

totally!!! I was thinking along the lines of the old cliche:
“raging bull enters china shop”

twinfishrising
twinfishrising
September 13, 2010 7:30 am

Some hilarious and beautiful interps here you guys. I got nothin….with my venus and mars in kataka I can only see the lack of intimacy and it actually freaks me out to look at.

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 7:47 am
Reply to  twinfishrising

Kinda like she’s more concerned on who’s watching her being hit on.

Went out with a Leo, Scorp Moon, Mars Gem and first place he took me out to was a bar with a gay male area in the back. Didn’t mind but he was all over me and I could just feel he was trying to make someone else jealous. Could feel the lack of genuine intimacy toward me. It was more like a show.

Belgian LobsterScorp
Belgian LobsterScorp
September 13, 2010 7:00 am

Hi, unpredictable Pisces! Txs for the support there. Well, I use all kinds of languages since i’m not native English, so hence the franco whatever typo slang into the sentences. Frêle means “frail” & röntgen is x-ray. I looked it up on Google translator for you, hope it makes sense. To Ms @ 10.58: I like your view 😉
@ Sweetpea 4.04: Nono, she’s so utterly not crying for help, not remotely 😀

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 7:18 am

lol…yeah, that’s why she can’t let him go (the looks/sex appeal) even tho he’s a controlling arse hole…

Charles
Charles
September 13, 2010 6:42 am

Blue Valentine.. just like Blue Lagoon, except with valentines instead of lagoons. http://www.imdb.com/media/rm1112972544/tt0080453 Oh yeah, and Photoshop has been invented since then too. Photoshop must have been invented by a Virgo, for Virgos. So now Miss Virgo doesn’t even have a single hair out of place. No pimples? That’s not good enough. How about no pores? She doesn’t sweat, she doesn’t even perspire. She doesn’t even pee, Virgos don’t have such indelicate body parts (and if she did, she’d have them photoshopped away). She never even drinks water. She’s an air-tarian. She’s thinking to herself, “I can’t believe this guy… Read more »

anna
anna
September 13, 2010 6:05 am

An Uber Saturn in Libra moment…
just too nice!
Bring uranus+jup back into opposition!

Dutchy
Dutchy
September 13, 2010 5:52 am

“I’ve perfected my Scorpionic powers to where I can now smell your thoughts.”

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 7:48 am
Reply to  Dutchy

cool…

anna
anna
September 13, 2010 5:50 am

kiss me if you can, way too pretty man

i’llpretend that your hot scorpiiman
but i just know my ultravirg trumps you-
photoshop is virgonasc afterall!

much much libra prettiness here!
scorpman is gettin fired up- but she is
sextiling all the way

Lucy
Lucy
September 13, 2010 5:44 am

Are they a young Italian newlywed couple posing for their first Christmas card together ? Is he a sexy hawk about to rescue and breastfeed a sweet, innocent downy chick or at the very least feed her regurgated bits of gummy worm ? Ryan is channeling a smoldering Rudolph Valentino (who had Moon & Asc in Libra) and Michelle looks like porn star turned politician Cicciolina before the long hard years in flip floppy Italian parliament. Gawd just waiting for the train to come on time there can make you old ! And Michelle’s like, Um. Did someone leave their… Read more »

Scorp
Scorp
September 13, 2010 5:52 am
Reply to  Lucy

lolol .. The whole world should be living in Lucys head!! lol You’re a hoot!

Lucy
Lucy
September 13, 2010 7:02 am
Reply to  Scorp

one of the best compliments from a Scorp ever,
(usually they’re a bit harder on this Leo eh !)
Grazie

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 7:19 am
Reply to  Scorp

funny…like the way you worked in the bird stuff.. 😉

Scorp
Scorp
September 13, 2010 11:19 am
Reply to  Sweetpea

It’s my Gemini Moon telling it like it is Lucy! 😉

Scorp
Scorp
September 13, 2010 5:29 am

I have nothing. sigh. Well that’s not entirely true.. I do have something but it stems from the psychological damage done from watching too much “Dexter” so I think it’s probably best to let this one slide…..

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 4:04 am

From behind her lovely Libran Sun, Cancerian Moon, Scorpio rising eyes, she is actually giving a call for help..(can catch a glimpse of it particularly in her right eye). Scorpio Sun, Aries Moon, Leo rising boyfriend (he’s also got Sun opposite Pluto, Mars opposite Venus, Mars square Pluto and Saturn conjunct his Aries Moon (makes him a bit of a grouchy kill joy and sulky, dangerous), but he’s still angry at her flirting all and sundry the night before and flashing the papparazzi (okay, she’s actually a Sagg rising) after a couple of Long Island Iced Teas.. He looks to… Read more »

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 4:06 am
Reply to  Sweetpea

And I have no idea what that tattoo actually is but reminds me of a chicken…

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 5:06 am
Reply to  Sweetpea

Just re-read Mystic’s blurb. Guess I was supposed to have used the Virgo and Scorp signs…Oh dear/well..

emily
emily
September 13, 2010 3:53 am

Even before I figured out who they were, they looked like a bad combination. Supposedly virgo and scorpio are v. complimentary though. Maybe it’ll work for them and their characters in the film. Or maybe its ascendant sign synastry. I’d bet Michelle Williams has her rising sign in libra (pluto first house) or in scorp.

samina
samina
September 13, 2010 3:45 am

“Help… I’m melting!” 😉

virgo cat
virgo cat
September 13, 2010 3:06 am

Wow. I was going to say “She sure looks like Uber Virgo, Claudia Schiffer”! so my line is:
“Michelle Williams playing Claudia Schiffer in allegory of Daphne and Apollo except like Last Temptation of Christ she is having a moment with a satyr”

virgo cat
virgo cat
September 13, 2010 3:08 am
Reply to  virgo cat

Or Michelle Williams playing Claudia Schiffer playing Bridget Bardot playing Daphne being seduced by a satyr…

Steph
Steph
September 13, 2010 3:04 am

What is it with Ryan Gosling looking really unattractively weird one moment (Lars and the Real Girl, Remember the Titans) to really hot, like in The Notebook and this photo? Ugh, actors. Caption: have him at your will like a (moon) goddess I couldn’t help but imagine the scenario behind this pic though: With those retro red plump lips, luminous eyes and platinum blonde hair dye job, she’s a Cancer. Her Scorp boyfriend is consoling her after crying over the wrong hair color. She’d wanted hightlights, not this plain one-color mess that she now has to live with until she… Read more »

ale
ale
September 13, 2010 2:27 am

Grand Mystic Thank You!!!! You Have a way To Elegantly Keep The Balls Up In THe Air. I love your Work !!

ale
ale
September 13, 2010 2:25 am

“The Perfect Moment” MMMM!!!!

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 2:12 am

Not in the mood to make up a story but I’ve never seen Michelle looking so pretty/glam. Usually she is photographed sans/minimal makeup when out with her little girl.

Spirit
Spirit
September 13, 2010 12:21 am

Prison Tat ?

piscesienne
piscesienne
September 12, 2010 11:23 pm

‘Fixed meets Mutable: Saturn’s Final (hot) Revenge’

Ryan Gosling just has that ‘thing’ … that smooth Libran ‘I’ll charm the pants off you (!)’ vibe combined with a kind of Scorpionic ‘but then I’ll leave in the early hours of the morning without a word’ vibe. In other words, just plain HOT. Even with that ‘Where The Wild Things Are’ type tattoo.

Charley
Charley
September 12, 2010 11:34 pm
Reply to  piscesienne

Hahaha love it, he’ll be having his Saturn Return this week too and Saturn is about to sit on Venus in Libra for the next 10 months. If only I could be there to comfort him *sigh*.

Vera
Vera
September 12, 2010 11:09 pm

World’s most beautiful gorilla falls in love with wind-up doll.

The sweet smell of a newly-made doll.

Awkward dance moments.

Sexy chiropractor’s wonder cure for Saturn-inspired stiff, sore neck.

(Am I allowed more than one, Mystic?)

goldfleece-risingfish-twinmoon
goldfleece-risingfish-twinmoon
September 13, 2010 8:30 am
Reply to  Vera

I agree Vera, she has that proto type of a polyester girl look going on.

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 8:34 am
Reply to  Vera

I like that too Vera. “Sweet smell”….Libran

Usually call my Libran gdaughter “baby doll”. She very matter of factly snipped back, “I am not a doll!”

unpredictable pisces
unpredictable pisces
September 12, 2010 11:06 pm

you guys are seriously writing off his tattoo?

Ms.
Ms.
September 12, 2010 11:09 pm

i’l get over it in about 2 minutes but I did cringe at it. x

Charley
Charley
September 12, 2010 11:14 pm
Reply to  Ms.

“Oh no,” he laughs, “that’s a homemade tattoo”. He has many, apparently, all of them “ridiculous”. “A tattoo should never be meaningful,” he explains, “because at a certain point you’re going to hate it, and it might as well make you laugh.”

Good philosophy Ryan. I kind of like it but maybe that’s because he’s my astro dreamboat twin.

funickity
funickity
September 12, 2010 11:04 pm

VIRGIN IN HOT WATER…can the ice maiden resist a ‘scorping’?

Ms.
Ms.
September 12, 2010 11:00 pm

what a stupid tattoo

Andromeda
Andromeda
September 12, 2010 10:58 pm

Ryan: “Snort, snort, sploofle, mmn”
Michelle: “Seriously, it’s not candy-floss, it’s hair. Stop, I am so going to hit you right now, really..”.

Ms.
Ms.
September 12, 2010 10:58 pm

he is holding her head in place because he hypnotized her, he wants complete control of the ivory tower that is her mind, where she lives. he is secretly reprograming her sleepwake whispering strange dead tongues in her ear so he may rewire her virgo daily unto his bidding

twinfishrising
twinfishrising
September 13, 2010 7:14 am
Reply to  Ms.

nice!

Charley
Charley
September 12, 2010 10:56 pm

I’m crap at these but they both look a bit odd in that pic.

He’s born two days after me, same year. What a dreamboat.

Dolphin3
Dolphin3
September 12, 2010 10:39 pm

Caption – “tight hold, watch them explode”

ana
ana
September 12, 2010 10:14 pm

Caption ” are you really ready for “his” kind of passion?”

Clare
Clare
September 12, 2010 10:06 pm

Caption for the pic: Virgo innocence meets “Trust me and I’ll protect you” Scorpio

Belgian LobsterScorp
Belgian LobsterScorp
September 12, 2010 9:26 pm

To me, this picture is a relief. An omen of “it does exist”. This pic visualises the heralded excercise on the masculine-feminine balancing out. There’s much yin in his lovin caring expression while it just confirms the sexiness and power of masculine drive in him as well. She’s lookin quite frêle, yet her “detached” gaze is nothin less than a glimps of how this mutual recpetion between them empowers her natural poise in this world. On top, if she’s Virgo, she poses out the typical Scorpionic mystique of being at rôntgen-vibe with herself, him, the situation and the world, all… Read more »

unpredictable pisces
unpredictable pisces
September 12, 2010 11:04 pm

hey BLS, you’ve written that really well. i love the scorpio losing power crave in total surrender .. this is a concept SO alluring in so many ways. [Not in having someone surrender to someone else, but surrender to their feelings, existence, love, and more]

I could use google translate to tell me what frele and rontgen-vibe (i can’t do accents on this page) mean in this context, but I would prefer to ask you.

Uranian&Plutonic Virgo
Uranian&Plutonic Virgo
September 13, 2010 11:55 pm

Awww good Universe, that is beautiful to read…… *eyes leaking*

fluidfeline
fluidfeline
September 12, 2010 9:22 pm

He looks rather comfortable here (and she not so much) but i love him with rachel mcadams and they have multiple connections in their charts – both scorps and with venus/pluto – pluto conj.

Ms.
Ms.
September 12, 2010 10:52 pm
Reply to  fluidfeline

ooo I love rachel mcadams. she is my straight girl crush I think.

The Leo Socialite
The Leo Socialite
September 13, 2010 8:09 am
Reply to  Ms.

He and Rachel M broke up…he is SINGLE

unpredictable pisces
unpredictable pisces
September 12, 2010 8:53 pm

i am rubbish at the astro captions/backstories. what i will say is that michelle williams looks very different, and very hot. considering ryan gosling is holding her that way she looks disturbingly disengaged. Is this film just a revised version of The Notebook? Dificult city grl is won over by Quietly Spoken But Determined And Really Hot Guy. Ryan gosling is neck and neck with viggo mortensen for my Lover If I Had The Chance list.

piscesienne
piscesienne
September 12, 2010 11:26 pm

Amen to your If I Had The Chance list! Maybe a Piscean thing, because I also find both of them outrageously hot … *sigh*

JenKatakaAqua
JenKatakaAqua
September 13, 2010 12:43 am
Reply to  piscesienne

Ummm, you just stole MY list thank you very much. 😛 BUT, I have to say neither of them do anything for me clean-shaven. Ryan’s gotta have a beard and same with Viggo, preferably dirty and sweaty ala Aragorn in Lord of the Rings. siiiiiiiigh.

oh, and I have nothing at all in pisces. cancer sun/aqua moon & Rising.

unpredictable pisces
unpredictable pisces
September 13, 2010 10:36 pm
Reply to  JenKatakaAqua

i think it’s the excellent bone structure and intense eye thing. stubble and life experience add masculinity. add some artistic/sensitive elements and does it for me every time… well nearly

Nora Parsley
Nora Parsley
September 12, 2010 8:46 pm

Duck nose pouty boy and cybergirl play human…

Neither looks natural!

scorptastic
scorptastic
September 12, 2010 8:43 pm

i don’t know about the astro, but at first glance I thought she was nicole k.
she looks like she’s trying? he looks natural and beautiful.

Hummingbird
Hummingbird
September 12, 2010 7:52 pm

Hang on – is that a spot on the camera lens??

Sweetpea
Sweetpea
September 13, 2010 7:48 am
Reply to  Hummingbird

haha

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