Pisces seduction

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Astro-Gaga: What Sign Is She & What Is That Book?

February 10, 2010 in Astro Gaga by Mystic Medusa | 67 comments

What sign is she? Why the circle of light around her reading zone? What is the book?  Three months of Alpha-Mystic to the funniest explanation of this situation….

My theory is that she is some sort of a refugee from the Capricorn Zombie Book Club.

A Sagg (good legs) and so therefore making a point of reading some dishevelled 70s history book she found on a bus someplace exotic and now she’s going to base all her theories on that as nobody else has read it.

Or a Pisces waiting for the attractive carpenter to arrive and she’s heard he likes new age chicks. Will he believe that Reiki only works if it’s in her bedroom?

All Virgoans Are Atypical

May 27, 2009 in Astro-Cliches by Mystic Medusa | 71 comments

large_dulac_princess_pea_pEdmund Dulac

The Princess & The Pea really is the quintessential Virgoan Fairy Tale – non?

But a Virgo would deny that. Because Virgo is always sooo atypical. “Oh, I am not the typical Virgo, ” she doth protest. “The other week i let the fridge go without being vanilla wiped and the top shelf was not even colour co-ordinated.”

Or “I am like the opposite of what Virgos are meant to be like. Are you aware that your left sock has shrunk slightly in the wash or something and so it is out of kilter with the other? You can see that they are meant to match and are of the same pair but the left one is slightly more offwhite and the texture is not so smooth as that on the right.”

And “I am such an atypical Virgo. I was five minutes late to every single one of my appointments last Wednesday although it wasn’t my fault as I was having my curtains drycleaned and I had to ensure they used the correct cleaning product.”

Virgos may not DO everything but they sure as hell think of it & lie awake at night, noting the Not-Done in an orgy of self-guilting whereas our Scorp drifts off to sleep happily thinking of conspiracy theory, Saggo of their next trip (beach or mountain and what dullard obligation can they skip paying for to fund the trip – YAYYY!?) and Pisces fantasising re their latest crush and how best to spring their Stun & Beguile seduction campaign.

But poor darling sweet Virgo…they fall asleep thinking “baking soda…mend hem..book dentist…DAMN it….”

Remember Charlie Sheen was one of the few clients sprung in the Heidi Fleiss escort scandal because he kept meticulous records.