Pilates astrology

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Neptune in Pisces – Barefoot?

September 29, 2009 in Astro TrendWatch by Mystic Medusa | 58 comments

Image_Resize_Merge_imagesBrenda Joysmith

I reckon Neptune into Pisces (sooner than you think!) is going to coincide with a big barefoot trend. Totally. I was reading this article on the weekend and it resonates. I have been thinking for a while that the more women do Pilates, yoga and osteopathy etc, the less sense high heels make. Once you’re aligned, they’re hard to wear because you can’t stand being thrown that out of whack. There are all these shoes coming out that mimic being barefoot and a whole movement of peeps saying ‘fuq shoes’ and going all Jesus on us.

Okay, i had a boyfriend years ago who was an ambo and he had the most hideous lectures as to what might happen to one’s feet should some disgusting bit of viral material enter the bloodstream via a puncture from some dirty microscopic shard of glass on the filthy street pavements and all. And maybe this is like some psychological reaction formation as i no longer like to fly down escalators post-champagne miraculously able to sprint, squat, do more or less anything in sky-high stilettos…Okay, i did used to twist my ankle a bit.

But what if this is really liberating and amazing? Like new era stuff. Pisces rules feet and Neptune rules Pisces…Or would one also have to have a litter and some  peeps to bear it and then put down satin for when-ever your precious tootsies had to touch the actual earth? Would litters be  more ECO? O.m.g. there is a problem with obesity, they say, and there is a problem with the environment. Everyone gets litters and we have to take turns being litter-bearers? It’s amazing I am not employed as a consultant.

Okay, back to the bare feet…Thoughts?

viggo+mortensen+barefootViggo Mortensen hates shoes, says they make his back ache & goes barefoot where-ever poss, even on the red carpet. Ditto Lenny Kravitz and Travis Fimmel.

travis_fimmel_02Even Enrique Iglesias…Seriously, I saw him in concert a while ago with Not-The-Typical-Virgo practically having to be hospitalised for swooning, women doing pole vaults to try and get onto stage & the audience hissing at Anna Kournikova when she ponced out. Anyway, he was barefoot for most of it and said he hates having his feet constricted in any way.

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Astro-Beauty; Legs & Your Past Lives

June 22, 2009 in Astro-Beauty by Mystic Medusa | 25 comments

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A Sagittarius Trying To Be Inscrutable

Sagittarians, i.m.o. always seem to have the best legs of the Zodiac & infuriatingly effortlessly so. Though maybe it’s because they are so active & stride around the world doing athletic things. Not so effortless after all.

Geminis come 2nd as they tend to be able to keep a kind of gamine thing going on…Librans do well with legs too though that’s more of a diligence a la Pilates, massage & cream.

Virgoans are third-equal tie with Libra by dint of being able to bloody well stick with those no-caffeine-no-wheat-no-diary gorgeous legs reccies.

Legs tips please…I think probably the only thing i ever feel nostalgic about being really super-young is that spontaneously casually slithering into a mini-skirt and strutting out the door sensation. It’s heaven.

Leg tips; It totally hurts but doing the ’stretching out the ilio-tibial muscle on a roller’ seems to iron out dimples on the side of the legs & it’s like a good pain + amazing for suppleness.

I would adore to be convinced otherwise but i think cellulite creams don’t particularly work (?) apart from the aromatherapy oils with ingredients such as juniper & cypress.

Acupuncturists can get rid of little capillary-vein things & their cupping is amazing for “stagnant” qi in the legs. Rolfing, Myo-Fascial massage and other deep tissue stuff are all good…

And – i once read this in a (I think) Denise Linn book – any stubborn fat or cellulite on the thighs is stored anger re relationships in past lives.

O.m.g. So there is a really good batso mugwort-dreaming target for a quiet night. You go into your dreamworld, totally willing to confront and work through past life lovers who gave you the shits & you wake up with smooth thighs.

Yes! I am thinking that processed foods such as pastries are prob also a bit to blame.

Astro-Beauty; Yoga-Yes, No, Fanatical or Loathe It…?

June 12, 2009 in Astro-Beauty by Mystic Medusa | 124 comments

stevenklein-madonna2Steven Klein Pic Of Madonna

At the risk of sounding seriously bats – a High Functioning Flake for sure – i never went to Kundalini Yoga as threatened because they’d moved buildings and the Feng Shui of the new building is fuqed. There you go.  And even though half my friends SWEAR by Yoga – the yoga peeps at my gym give me the freaks. They’re a high-bummed & tight-lipped super-clique.

I think Yoga is kinda Scorpio/Plutonic whereas Pilates, which I love, seems more Aqua-Uranian. Proper Pilates has paraphernalia so it’s prob way more intricate & fussy than Yoga which could technically be done under a lotus tree in Woop-Woop.  Or on a chic, distressed 90’s style table in fishnet stockings, a la Madonna.

I think Martial Arts are obviously of Mars & weight-lifting seems Saturnine. Aqua anything – such as swimming -  is technically Neptunian but so is meditation & just ploughing up and down doing laps is way more Saturn too. Soooo, what’s your sign & preferred mode of exercise…?  Oh and I guess if you say nothing but lugging around crates of wine & walking to the patisserie then that would be Jolly Jupiter, our patron saint of righteous indulgence.