Cancerian Women

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Lindsay Lohan – It Was All Because Of Her Clutter

February 5, 2010 in Celeb Fluffery by Mystic Medusa | 29 comments

Astro-Cliche or not, Crab-Peeps are the WORST clutterers and hoarders. They cling tenaciously to even the most naff bit of memorabilia, clearly inappropriate clothing from centuries ago and non-needed administrivia. And I ADORE Cancerians but this trait irks my Mars in Virgo. So now it seems that Lindsay Lohan is to get her apparently hideously cluttered home uncluttered on American television.

Despite all the allegations, craziness, non-knickers-wearing, dionysian revels, flake stuff, I still love LL. Okay, mostly because of Mean Girls, which was a long time ago. But wouldn’t it be unreal if the big clean-out helped to fix her life up? That image above, btw, is of her bedroom.  Lindsay has a hardcore Mars in Capricorn with Pluto gliding up to conjoin it in a few years time. There ain’t nothing like a Pluto-Mars transit for streamlining your life and getting thy merde together.

See Also: Sacred Uncluttering

Astro-Gaga: What Sign Is She And What Happened?

November 23, 2009 in Astro Gaga by Mystic Medusa | 68 comments

10style2aJean-Baptiste Mondino

She is a Cancerian Mood-Swinger who works as a stylist at the Large Hadron Particle Collider (the scientists are expecting some media attention) and she took some weird shit back from a lab, hoping it would help her seduce her strange Aquarian lover. But he’s just morphed into a Reincarnate Atlantean after shes sprinkled even just a bit of the God-Particle powder into his chardonnay.

That or a kickboxing Libran with the shits at some wallpaper that suddenly DOES NOT WORK AT ALL AND W.T.F. WAS SHE DOING LETTING AN ARIES DO THE DECOR JUST BECAUSE SHE FANCIED HIM.

Astro-Fiends, Creativity & Discipline

October 24, 2009 in Astro-Fiends, Celeb Fluffery by Mystic Medusa | 57 comments

tharpThe Creative Habit – Twyla Tharp

I saw this Jezebel snip about how the choreographer genius Twyla Tharp “gets up at 5 a.m. six days a week to edit her upcoming book Collaborative Habit, then rehearses dancers for her musical Come Fly With Me for seven hours. “Structure is required for creativity,” says Tharp.”

Her older book, The Creative Habit, is by all accounts a madly inspirational and get-thee-to-it-thou-sluggard motivational polemic & how-to, cleverly riffing on the idea that creative cut-through arrives via just chilling t.f out & maybe getting a bit wasted along the way. Yes I totally get that the notes scribbled on bar coasters/back of one’s childen’s school newsletters amidst a Dionysian moment do not often pass creative scrutiny the next day.

But 5am? SIX days a week? As the base?

I was thinking along the lines of TT as a super-industrious Virgo.  A Capricorn? Note pics of her ludicrously flexible et al at age nearly 70. Caps will do that. They and Leo love to be photographed in their 4th century this lifetime or whatever is going on, just casually tucking an ankle behind their blowdried hair.

My own experience of the Saturn through Virgo Transit has led to untold time and money measurements – they become normal under such stars. You count hours – am i working so hard as i think or is it just that I am dreadfully disorganised or overly deadline conscious? You calculate. You start to keep tabs on yourself and it feels like heaven. Warning: Do NOT try this sort of thing if you are not having a major Saturn transit.

You gain an eerie Saturnine glee from such accountability. So I can see how an actual Capricorn (ruled by Saturn) or Virgo would arrive at the 5am each morning start-time for many a practical reason. You need more time? MAKE IT. This is how Earth Signs think.

But she’s a Crab!!! And I have never known a single Crab-Person yet who would not engage in many a complicated negotation to score extra early am sleep…My god, many of them become wealthy (they are the canniest sign of all, remember, most likely to be your next-door millionaire) just because they so value security and the ability to snooze peacefully in, shell intact, savings in place.

But i had a quick peek at Twyla Tharp’s Astro-Databank chart & she may be Cancerian and with her Moon in Sensual Libra et al (also a sleeping-in indicator) BUT she has one major astro-signifier that totally backs up this idea of creative discipline and in fact, makes it absolutely obvious that she would seek a career out of something mega-exacting, controlled AND creative..but with a tradition.

Astro-Fiends can check out her chart here & say what it is: It is ONE particular major aspect that totally stands out and matches her books + image.

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Astro-Boobs

September 21, 2009 in Astro-Cliches, Astro-Query by Mystic Medusa | 50 comments

gina_lollobrigida_02Cancerian Gina Lollobrigida

Ages ago I read, in an astrology book I cannot recall, that lady-Cancerians have “the most exquisitely sensitive and finely formed breasts of the Zodiac.” Yes, i remembered the phrase. Astrologically, as you can see from the ye olde pic below, different bits of the body have always been apportioned a sign/planet etc. Medical astrology is ancient and fascinating in itself, with a complex interplay between remedies & herbs also being assigned a planetary or cosmic value and so on.

But for now, I am mostly interested in the Cancerian thing…is this true? Best boobs? Most sensitive? And yes, I KNOW that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and that Draconian standards of beauty contribute to an out-dated & fuqed paradigm whereby women being merely judged by…Okay, maybe we stick to the most sensitive…

And btw, it IS so true that Aries have a little ‘Mars mark’ on their head or face, usually a dent or scar from some daring Ramzilla-style exploit. But yah, Aries “rules” the head and face.

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Barbara Cartland’s Birthday!

July 9, 2009 in Astro-Fiends, Astro-Passages, Celeb Fluffery by Mystic Medusa | 36 comments

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It is the birthday of Dame Barbara Cartland, author of approximately 723 books but best known for her romances. I went briefly bats for them when i was about 13, hoovering them up like crisps but they weren’t libidinal enough so i moved on. But apparently, her earlier books were sensationalist & banned et al. She calmed down post Chiron Return, in her early 50s.

Her books had fabulous titles such as The Angel & The Rake, Again The Rapture, Bride To A Brigand, The Lady & The Highwayman + my fave: The Haunted Heart.  BTW; if you don’t realise – “rake” is ye olde work for player. Hell knows how that came about. Thoughts?

The Dame was an early adopter of vitamins & health food – zealously recommending ginseng, bee pollen & brewers yeast to television hosts on her frequent media spots. She was step-grand-mother to Princess Diana – another Cancerian – and wore only pink, for her aura. She said of Diana: “The only books Diana ever read were mine and they weren’t awfully good for her.” As a council member, she barracked for the rights of midwives & gypsies. She is one of the best-selling authors of all time.

Her astro? She is a Cancerian Sun, of course and it is conjunct Mercury – classic signifier of the writer & she was certainly prolific. She had Venus in Leo – note opulence, in pic above & my theory is that Venus in Leo just LOVES to develop a Signature Look that sustains them spiritually and which they avidly stick to. True? False?

Moon – i think – in Aries so proto-feminist for sure. And would fight for what she believed in. Jupiter & Saturn conjunct in Cap  trine Mars in Virgo so tremendous work ethic even though she could have just settled for being a wife and/or vapid socialite…Weirder, Uranus OPP Pluto – WHAT a generation & Lilith conjunct North Node.

See, in her later career she made all her heroines virgins whom mysterious circumstances lead into having to hang around with handsome sociopathic & promiscuous aristocratic men about to be conquered by her purity – like she is a Unicorn – but in HER life, she went through a rather nasty scandal (infidelity, divorce et al in an age/class where such things very difficult) to be with the man she loved. And she went on tv in her mid-80s or something to boast about how her health methods (cold showers, bee pollen, steak tartare for brek) kept him virile and them both very active.

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M.F.K. Fisher: Ultra-Crab

July 3, 2009 in Astro-Cliches, Astro-Fiends, Celeb Fluffery, Metaphysical Quirks by Mystic Medusa | 27 comments

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Today is the birthday of   M.F.K. Fisher – to call  her a food writer is an understatement. She was fabulosity incarnate, amazingly talented and inspirational.

“You can still live with grace and wisdom, if you rely on your own innate sense of what you must do with the resources you have to keep the wolf from sniffing too hungrily through the keyhole.”

This is from a book she wrote during the wartime food shortages in 1942, called How To Cook A Wolf , that apparently saved many a woman from utter insanity & desperation.
Her Wiki

Beautiful and sensual – with a fascinating love life – she was an idiosyncratic writer who would come up with little gems such as:

“Probably one of the most private things in the world is an egg until it is broken.”

“Family dinners are more often than not an ordeal of nervous indigestion, preceded by hidden resentment and ennui and accompanied by psychosomatic jitters.”

“Wine and cheese are ageless companions, like aspirin and aches, or June and moon, or good people and noble ventures . . .”

Her practical tips are still excellent AND she wrote Not Now But Now – a weird but utterly absorbing book about a time-travelling, utterly amoral femme fatale sort of gourmet nympho who managed to cross into other dimensions via some kind of cosmic warp she disovered on a particular express train.

Her chart:

Sun, Mercury, Venus, Mars, Neptune and the North Node all clustered together in Cancer! Opposed by Uranus in Capricorn. And then a Moon-Jupiter in Leo…But all that Cancer & to be so interested in elegant forms of nourishment & the lives of the emotions…If you are not familiar with her works, do look at some of these links…

I DO think Cancerians are often the best cooks, btw.

Confused Crab – Up Himself Saggo?

February 2, 2009 in Astro-Cliches, Astro-Query by Mystic Medusa | 37 comments

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“Hi Mystic,

I enjoy your blog and Weekend Australian column.

Thought you might enjoy this bit of astro-prejudice.

Off and on i do internet dating on a well known site. A while ago i checked out the profile of a chap . He was a serious outdoorsy looking Sagittarian in a flak jacket, set against a river.  However, at the bottom of his profile, it said: ‘No Cancerians’, invoking images of those old signs that used to prohibit certain types of people and dogs.  How could my co-moon girls’ magic not worked? And could they have caused him so much grief?!

Confused Crab”

Dear Confused Crab,

How hilarious. Please can you e-mail him, pretending to be another out-doorsy Saggo?  Go on a date – something like the pair of you mountain biking along a river or climbing K2 or something else suitably Saggittarian and insane – yes? And then you FLUSH HIM OUT…Say, “so why do you say you don’t like Cancerians?” You could maybe wait until he was unbearably into you before confessing?

Or, put in your own ad and alter it to say NO SAGITTARIAN MEN IN FLAK JACKETS & see if he bites?  Did you quite like the look of him, apart from him having banned your sign? Also, is a flak jacket like what you wear in a war zone? Is he a foreign correspondent? Or is the flak jacket just to protect against Cancerian females?