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One For Lower Gemini Delia Antwerp Aaars

March 17, 2010 in Astro Gaga by Mystic Medusa | 45 comments

Michaelangelo Di Battista

It’s been a while but this is definitely one for the lookbook of Lower Gemini  Delia Antwerp Aaars

She’d like the feathery hoodie look – is it feathers? – and the oblique permission given for her to take up smoking again.

Now that the Sun is being rehabbed due to everyone being vitamin D deficient, she feels it’s only a matter of time before smoking is declared to be a valuable stimulant to the respiratory system.

This picture also inspires her to adopt a more “exotic” ancestry.  She likes the vibe of Haitian and that it would give her a good excuse to dabble (okay, again) in Voodoo but fears people will think she’s just being opportunistic with the quake. And that is NOT what gave her the idea.

Modern Mayan? Something a bit Latin so there’s olive skin (stupid bitch at the spray tan spa never does it dark enough for Delia’s liking) and plenty of smoking, pacing about and madness. Exotic but not ethnic. An exotic background will also certainly help her get her long awaited solo exhibition up…

Does anyone want Delia to have her own category?

Would A Real Taurus Wear The Taurus Vest?

March 15, 2010 in Astro-Fashion by Mystic Medusa | 49 comments

Would a real Taurus wear this truly Seventies retro Taurus-themed vest?

I think gimmicky vests like this are more the preserve of Gemini or Saggo…True Taureans are swathed in sensual fabrics and the only you’d notice from behind is their bottom. That’s not meant to be so rude as it sounds. But i don’t see Taurus as thinking about having anything decorative or a slogan on their back. Not even their own Bull symbol…Yes? No?

Astro-Gaga: The Ultimate Challenge

March 12, 2010 in Astro Gaga by Mystic Medusa | 58 comments

Vogue Italia March 2010 Miles Aldridge

Oh ALL right, I am fibbing.

This is not the Ultimate Challenge. But you must admit that this gorgeous picture is even more ripe for Astro-Gaga than usual…non?

The prize for the best/funniest astrological interpretation of this scenario is a year’s subscription to the Daily Mystic. If you already have one, you can give to a friend and earn enormous cred for being both cosmic and generous.

My feeling is that they are all really pissed and yet bored. I am thinking that the set of legs parked on the pristine tablecloth belong to an aristocratic Leo or Libra (table setting? exfoliated limbs?) who has invited a bunch of Saggos around with the promise of work at her African “lodge” but now it turns out that she does not really “own” it “as such” and that there are a few “complications with paperwork”…what she really wants is for the Saggos to utilize their insanely over-hyped “media connections” to publicise Leo/Libra’s new range of  Vajazzle.

Thoughts?

Astro-Gaga: Another Competition

March 9, 2010 in Astro Gaga by Mystic Medusa | 45 comments

Craig McDean – Interview Magazine

Rightio.

Three Months Of Alpha Mystic (Daily Mystic to your in-box, Daily, Weekly + Monthly Scopes and the Saturn Girl Scheduler) is the prize for the person with the best astro-analysis of this scenario.

I am just absolutely mystified.  To me it vaguely vibes of Piscean teenagers rendered completely nuts by the blast of invective and lecture-rant of the Capricorn parents who have just arrived home to find that nothing on the to-do list has been done. But I am sure you guys can do better than that.

Astro-Gaga: Coitus Virgo Interruptus

March 8, 2010 in Astro Gaga by Mystic Medusa | 31 comments

Steven Meisel – Vogue Italia March 2010

You know what? I am not even going to bother making this is a competition because it’s SO obvious and I’ve already won….

Never mind HER sign, the bloke is clearly a Virgo & he’s leapt out of bed in a Virgoan frenzy having sensed that the neighbour is once again letting his poodle piss on the Virgo’s apartment stairs. Or, this could be worse: He suddenly remembered that the doormat across the road was crooked and he’s glaring to see if anyone has straightened it yet.

Of course he could be a Virgo who has called a halt to sexual proceedings after glimpsing a strange stain on that lampshade and he KNOWS it is petty so is just collecting himself, a few deep breaths to deal with the situation and he will be fine.

He is also wearing sandals on her lovely floor so as not to catch some nasty fungal disorder on his feet and she is a Gemini attempting to both look sexy, flatter her boobs AND reach over behind the chaise lounge for her mobile.

Thoughts?

Mars & The Supermodel: Astro-Naomi

March 4, 2010 in Celeb Fluffery, D.I.Y. Astro by Mystic Medusa | 40 comments

Naomi Campbell on the run? I thought i was hallucinating when i saw that tv headline at the gym this morning.

But yes, she’s done it again. I’ve lost track. She slapped her maid. She hit someone with her phone. She did community service mopping floors for something abusive. And now this.

My Leo-Ex interviewed her a while ago and was incoherent with lust, babbling about the brilliance of her hair (he is a Leo), skin, scent, skin tone, physique, hair again, eyes, animal charisma, skin scent, mode of movement etc.  When asked how he found her apparent anger problem, Leo Ex explained that she could be the Antichrist for all he gave a damn.

But still. She is getting some form here.

Astrologically, we look to Madam’s Mars and voila…in Gemini and square to Pluto.  That’s a classic rage-attack waiting to happen. I have Mars conjunct Pluto and used to hit the roof all the time. It’s like being one of those amazing actors who just need one trigger to access whatever the emotion. The drycleaner can’t find your skirt – voomp. Mars-Pluto can be volanic and the square is challenging.

So, for an idea of yours or anyone elses potential anger issues, look to the ‘hard’ (square, conjunction, opposition) aspects made from Mars.

Saturn In Virgo Fashion

March 3, 2010 in Astro-Fashion by Mystic Medusa | 15 comments

Yikes so Saturn is heading back into Virgo & we’re all going to be working a bit harder come April but could this St Virgo necklace of thorns (Virgos don’t do crowns – too ostentatious, obviously) catch on?

I think St Virgo would quite like it but want to trade in the gold for something less vulgar…a dignified silver?  Thoughts?

Astro-Fashion: Sixties Horoscope Mini Dress

March 2, 2010 in Astro-Fashion by Mystic Medusa | 13 comments

Okay, I wouldn’t wear this but somebody would and it’s vintage for just $85 USD.  Apparently the material is mega-rare, i’d love it as a dressing gown!

Scorping Out

March 1, 2010 in Astro-Fashion by Mystic Medusa | 48 comments

Getty Images

And this is like SUCH a Scorpionic look from ultra-Scorp Anna Wintour.  She’s prob pissed off at all the Virgoans Of Fashion. The girl next to her looks as if she is in intense, silent prayer.

The Ultimate Virgo

March 1, 2010 in Astro-Cliches, Astro-Fashion, Celeb Fluffery by Mystic Medusa | 72 comments

Whenever I read something about Tom Ford - and there has been heaps lately because of his apparently brilliant directorial debut, The Single Man – I always think that he truly is the Ultimate Virgo. His attention to detail, control-freakiness and self-confessed Virgoanness are all part of his legend.

Along with Carine Roitfeld, he is one of my favourite Virgoans Of Fashion – that’s the thing, there are UNTOLD Virgos working in the fashion industry.  It totally makes sense. A Virgo needs to work in an industry where ability to spot a dodgy hemline or fake Hermes handbag from three blocks away is an asset.  Where everyone has diet bipolarity, alternating between champagne, chocolate and detoxes.

Tom Ford, they say, is obsessed with hygiene & goes through a bottle of eye drops a week as he requires that his eyes look always bright, sparkling and alert. Is this enough to afford him Ultimate Virgo status? Do you know any Ultimate Virgos? My vision of Ultimate Virgo is that he/she is go into the clean-thing (like Ingrid Bergman) that there would be weekly colonics. For the flat tummy and because once glimpsed, the ideal of the clean colon is hard for Ultimate Virgo to let go of.

Ultimate Virgo would also get bi-weekly hair trims, enjoy vigorous exfoliations & sometimes spend up to an hour comparing the mineral analysis of various spring waters in the supermarket. If Ultimate Virgo had a shrink, the shrink would themselves be in therapy just to gather stamina for the relentless questioning of Ultimate Virgo.  Thoughts?

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