I am not sure if this is of astro signficance, but I thought I’d write and let you know.
I’m the same gal who sent you the “Lone Virgo Warrior” thing about the older bloke with cartoon bed-covers, now emailing from a different address because of, well, this whole crazy shebang.
To cut a long story short, I’d been “friends” with a gal since high school. Let’s call her Aqua. I’m Virgo, Pisces rising, Sagg moon.
We’d been in contact for 10 years after leaving school. She was a very moody, isolated person at school and had…very few friends. She made some good changes in her life, found her own place, joined a sports team, things were looking good, but she became increasingly possessive. As in, she wasn’t making any other friends besides me, and was constantly sending me messages wanting to know what I was “Up to”.
She wouldn’t go to any kind of social event (e.g. friend’s parties) unless I accompanied her. When I introduced her to other pals, she was hostile to them, and I found it hard to make new friends with her at my side. I got a facial piercing and she kept telling me how “ugly” it was so much that I took it out when around her. If I knocked back an invite, she would grill me on what I was doing (instead of accompanying her)–it felt like a police interrogation.
She also wanted to know my work schedule, so as to keep track of me. I felt constantly on edge and put it down to poor health. She was prone to developing unsubstantiated hatreds for random friends, making prank phone calls and online stalking. I found this pretty unsettling. For example: Invitation to a friends party. Aqua’s response: “Is person X going? Because I’m not going if they are. I hate person X. She acts like she’s better than us.”
In 2012, around the so-called Reset Moon, I was telling an Aries friend of mine about how Aqua really stressed me out. How I never felt relaxed in her presence, like I was always walking on eggshells, lest she take something the wrong way and ‘blow up’ (as was often the case) and my friend said, “Do you enjoy her company, do you actually have anything in common?” and I had to say “No”. She said, then WHY are you her friend? and I replied “I guess because I feel sorry for her”. She said “That is not a good basis for a friendship, it’s not good for you or her.” I realized she was right. Aries said when she first met Aqua, she thought she was my “jealous lesbian lover”. Wow.
Aries friend said “Cut all contact” and I realized it was the answer. I knew, no matter how little contact I had with Aqua, I would still feel trapped. So I made a bold decision. I changed my mobile number, deleted myself from Facebook and changed my email. I got a land line call from her, demanding to know “What was up” and I said I “just wasn’t feeling very social” due to my “health”. She demanded to know when I’d be better. I sweetly explained I couldn’t give her a time frame. I think she’s gotten the message.
While I get the odd phone call at work (heavy breathing, giggles) I haven’t felt too harassed. While I do feel nervous going out, lest she jump me in the street and interrogate me, I have never felt happier in my LIFE. I realize, having been raised a strict Catholic, that I was the Ultimate St Virgo Martyr and Queen of Doormats. I was always the “nice girl”. While I felt very guilty for cutting contact with Aqua, it passed, and the feeling of freedom and happiness that followed was overwhelming. I feel that I have thrown off St Virgo Martyrdom and am now on the path to pursuing healthy friendships with strong boundaries.
I just wanted to thank you for your Get Scorped reading. If it hadn’t been for the Reset Moon, I don’t know if I would have gotten the courage to cut the ties.
Thank You Mystic.
The Lone Virgo Warrior
Dear Lone Virgo Warrior,
Congratulations! And do please update on the cartoon bedspread guy in the comments if possible. And yes, i remember as if it was yesterday, my Qi Vampire friendship from several decades ago. Fuq it was frightful.
She had bad skin. She blamed me for that. She made some poor choices with her sexual partners – she was also a Love Zombie – and would whine and emote about it 24-7. I mean, she would have sex once with Saggo Drummers who said “I don’t want a relationship” – i don’t think these dudes were committing to even having sex lying down – and then send their mother flowers or pots of jam, signed “Saggo Drummers Girlfriend.”
She alienated every one within radius via this bizarre combo of strident chaos and incompetence. She would never tell me her birthday lol (because she thought astrology an occult practice) but then guilt me for not buying her a birthday present. Weirdly enough she thought astrology dabbling in the dark arts but her oujia board and heavy hydroponic dreamweed seance sessions fine.
When i said i couldn’t see her because i had to go to my great aunt’s funeral she confronted me to say she could not find any death notice in the newspaper so where was i really. I am going to have to smudge my house with Mugwort and put a line of salt across the front door tonight just thinking about this bitch.
HOW do these people get a hook into our lives? It’s like getting a wart or parasites or something. Is the psychic cue that you have to totally up your immune system? You know…and the spiritual version of that to ward off these people even approaching?
It was totally one-sided. If i had a problem she’d brush it off with “that’s sad but ANYWAY…” So i relate and Qi Vampires can often prey on the most nicest and beautiful people…The day i realized (also thanks to an Aries telling me to give this chick the flick) that i didn’t have to deal with this person, was intensely liberating. It’s like shrugging off an invisible damp mouldy wet blanket, along with the constant feeling of guilt because you’re pretty sure you’ve somehow offended them…again.
Thank you for sharing and what does everyone else think?
Image: Les Vampires