The Saturn In Libra Love Exam

Everything i know about love, i learned from Saturn in Libra. Technically, this could be true you know. Libra is the sign of relationships and Saturn the planet of, sigh, lessons.  Since November 2009, notice how marriage equality has been a LOT more on the agenda.

There must be other issues, yes? It’s just that the Pluto in Capricorn Global Financial Fuqery extravaganza has hogged the limelight somewhat.

But with Saturn nearly OUT of Libra, let’s test this. What have you learned about love, partnerships or relationships that you did not know before?

Because, when Venus gets into Kataka in a few days time (yes, finally) and squares Uranus/opposes Pluto (the Zap Zone) and THEN squares Saturn, you will definitely have a chance to try out what you have learned about relationships since late 2009. This will be a practical, hands-on examination – no multiple choice, no internal assessment.

There is always a test with Saturn and it’s not really recommended that you study at the last minute, try to rely on caffeinated brilliance in the moment or sleep with the book under your pillow to absorb info via osmosis.

Are you ready?*

* Subscribers, don’t worry, i am gonna to go psycho on this one in the scopes lol.

Image: Steven Meisel

158 thoughts on “The Saturn In Libra Love Exam

  1. Absolutely ready. If anything it’s probably the first ‘exam’ in my life that I’ve actually studied and long hard for ;D

  2. What have I learned? Sheesh, where do I start? That I’d rather be with a straight guy than the decent-but-in-denial bloke I live with. (Saturn trans natal 8th and squared my moon.) The end of tolerations. Financial freedom and regaining my independence are my top priorities and I am now doing the plan to make it happen. Better late than never, and to my own surprise I’m loving the feeling of competence it’s bringing.

    The guy I fell in love with – well, Saturn did his moon, squared his sun, plus Pluto beat the crap out of his sun and Venus at the same time, so I presume he learned to make tough choices, get his arse to the gym to work off that excess energy and focus on being a good dad.

    The guy I live with will have Saturn on his asc and Pluto on his sun shortly. I think Saturn’s only just getting started at my place. Sigh.

    • imagine the level of understanding and tech-support you can offer to your saturn-pluto-transiting fella, chrysalis! you have so much insight and awareness. He is lucky to have you around young lady.

      • Thanks Pi. It’s going to get messier before it resolves, but weirdly I have never felt more empowered. Saturn / Pluto and yes, Neptune, lol, have brought really good people into my life to help me with stuff I needed help with. I have also set a clear intention for the parting to be amicable and compassionate and this has really helped. x

        • …uh-oh… just realised that Cap A and Cap B had similar brute astro going on, obvs, duh. *Bashes head with blunt instrument*
          Maybe I should hire myself out as a life coach for blokes doing simultaneous Pluto and Saturn transits! St Neptune’s Refuge for Caps in Crisis. They’d book Neptune, but Saturn would show up :)

  3. “Everything i know about love, i learned from Saturn in Libra” — and my 7th house just happens to be Libra, too– AND I have Pluto-Moon conjunct in Libra! So, I can’t even wrap my head around all that’s gone down over the last three years. What have I learned? Ask me some years from now, when I’ve had enough time to sort it all out!

    Trains kill– this I know. But that was 11 years ago, way before Saturn in Libra…

    At any rate, I don’t think I can be tested: been there, took that. Done.

    • Hey Scorp Ink, what’s moon-pluto like for you natally? I mean, it’s not as though you have any other frame of reference, but I was curious about … i don’t know, when feelings crop up – where our ‘safe’ place is etc. i have moon in 7th too but it’s capricorn.

      • I don’t know if I’m getting what you’re asking, Pi… My “safe place” physically? Home, alone. Emo? In lieu of someone who really gets me, alone. Nature is always a safe place, as is tarot– alone. lol

        Is that what you mean?

        • I’m totally down with this sentiment: “In solitude we are least alone.” -Lord Byron

          So maybe when I say alone, I mean solitude. Because I do not find “alone” lonely: I find it comfy, safe, and free.

          Maybe that’s what Saturn has taught me in my 7th/Libra, maybe it’s more my Pluto-Moon conjunct in Libra, or both. idk.

          I’m a complete introvert: social stuff/people exhaust me, and I need solitude to recharge. That’s my hard-wiring.

          • o my goodness – completely and utterly me too – but i get so wrapped up in leo MC-ness and other stuff, i forget – today, i remembered, again. craving introversion time. x

            • I really really wanted introversion today too. Like Scorp inc, aloneness is peace, safety, recharge…

              But I went out and kept an appointment and kind of went quite flaky at it. Too bad if you don’t get to rest when you need to. My moon is in Gemini so I don’t know if that fits with PIs theory below.

          • But what I like/get the most from solitude is that

            in solitude, I can *Hear*. Hear me, hear everything.

            In solitude, I am least alone.

        • oh ok, yes I was being a bit unclear wasn’t I. As far as I understand the moon in our astro (and mystic’s luna luxe info!), it’s the state we head to when we need solace, comfort, it’s what we resonate with easily. I think. Also the way I see it, it’s what we turn into when stressed. So when i am super wound up, I turn into a Capricorn, lolol.

          So, with moon-pluto, yeah. Maybe that’s the non-negotiable solitude, or could that be all the scorp too…I was mainly curious about the possible intensity and so on. But maybe the Pluto-themed moon is more about going invisible, confronting ugly emotions head on… emotionally attuned to power…that sort of thing?

          anyone welcome to challenge my ideas of course

      • Ah, I like that: “Ink.” Ink is permanent. And confounding to octopus predators.

        • aha, yes. Scorpio ink takes many forms! I sort of had a scorpionic tattoo parlour in mind when I wrote that. For some reason I imagine you with tattoos. maybe i am conflating scorpios with body art.

    • i have the same moon/pluto conjunction in libra … a spacious conjunction … pluto in the 11th and moon in the 12th though, an interesting tension/companionship always …

      saturn in libra – plutonic development but brilliant. i would do it all again for the clarity and kindness to myself that i presently feel.

      • ah, but i do feel that The Big Test is nigh – the stage is set: an embryonic r’ship in a strange dormancy period until later in the year – separated by work and half a globe.

  4. hahahaha! Mystic you are so fab. “study at the last minute, try to rely on caffeinated brilliance in the moment or sleep with the book under your pillow to absorb info via osmosis.” Therein you have just described 3/4 of my study techniques :D lololol

    But apart from that, I can in fact thank the Old Flame Toro (we were lovers back in the heady days of whenever) – we briefly reconnected, as friends, and at the same time there were all sorts of unanswered questions and personal ‘narratives’ going on for each of us, then boom!! Sayonara. so, this triggered a bit of love-zombie-ism, which I had mis-diagnosed in the early stages as something else. But it was a textbook case; all the symptoms were there.

    Anyway long story short, I decided to stop this needy – (secret) stalky – never being responded to – bullshit and work out WTF was going on, and instead research my brain for why it was constantly fuqing with me.

    Lessons, in summary:
    1. Work out exactly why you are attracted to someone. Is it pheromonal / pure sexual, their freedom drive, their blissed out welcome when you rock up, great mental affinity, fire in the soul, a resemblance to your First Ever Kindergarten Crush? Break it down, then let it be.

    2. If a man is attracted to you, you WILL know about it even if he is the most shy human on earth.

    2a. Corollary: If he is not, no amount of effort at charming him to pieces will change that.

    3. FFS no stalking. read “Textbook Romance” by Zoe Foster: THIS is the book that began to really, truly snap me out of day-to-day love zombie-ism.

    4. Work out what is (still) patterning how you form, maintain, and end relationships, resolve conflict etc. For this, it was Intimacy and Solitude, and the White Knight Syndrome that helped me to grasp why I did what I did, on a more cyclical scale, why I might have accepted such rubbish behaviour from partners etc etc etc.

    The End. As I always say, self-awareness is king!!

    • so we’re clear, allow me to offer the flipside of the “sit around and wait for the guy to call” scenario – if YOU are not attracted to a man, does any amount of calling, messages, emails, helplessly adoring puppy dog looks change that? NOOoooooo. So, it works both ways. No gender specificity, in my books.

        • I think also – and this is very Saturn – if someone is not attracted to you, so what? Suck it up. It is what it is. It’s not malicious or some karmic issue. We’re going to end up with a Love Zombie commenting here soon, if we’re not careful. Return of the Fuqed Up Clueless Whores lol.
          Did anyone notice i changed my Twitter description?

        • Yes, true!!! Having to deal with the possibility and the consequences (Saturn of course – consequences!! lol) of truly accepting that they do not want to connect somehow. But it hurts too, yeah? I found that it was important – and perfectly OK and necessary because my moon in Cap can be a bit harsh on the old feelings – to feel whatever I was feeling – sadness, loss, regret for what might have been… the Amazing Pisces Scientist was my first piece of homework for this situation. (Sigh.)

          but yes. getting matter of fact about it. No one is being an arse… they’re just acting in accordance with their own feelings?

        • I agree – this is GOLD.

          No.s 2 and 2a are bracingly good.

          No. 4 is the brain-bender (for me) but sticking to 1-3 will make me more able to complete 4!

          Bravo!

    • Pi, you are awesome!! Well articulated :)

      Number 1 is EXACTLY what I cottoned-on to myself over the last year. WHY are you with this person?? What is it about them that you are into? Maybe it’s just because they have a pulse. Maybe it’s because they always pay for dinner. Maybe it’s because you didn’t have enough sex as a teen and were thought of as frigid so now you think it’s kinda cool as a 30-something gal you have completely meaningless sex just ’cause. Guilty of all these reasons for staying in relationships.

      But I feel so free for the KNOWING and then having a choice whether to continue on anyway. Or run a mile. Choice, bro. Knowledge is power.

      Wow, I’m really embracing my inner Saturn at the mo. Lessons and pragmatism are my friends.

    • ha…ha..ha. I have been cleaning out my very-neglected desk and discovered this bit of self-therapy / reality check that I wrote out re the Amazing Pisces Scientist, about 12 months ago. In the name of, oh whatever (sigh), I shall type it up here:
      ———–

      Dear [Pi], please can you work through this before you implode.

      [Amazing Pisces Scientist] is:

      1) On the other side of the country, and not coming back anytime soon.

      2) DID NOT CONTACT YOU when he came to this city to visit his people. Repeat. Did Not. Contact. You.

      3) *Does not go out of his way* to be particularly pleasant to you.

      4) Is SIX years younger than you.

      5) HAS NOT shown himself to be capable of holding a conversation with you.

      6) You have VERY FEW IF ANY mutual interests (save for perhaps a shared sense of humour).

      Do not look at the plus side or any of his saving graces until you have grasped, completely, each and every one of these facts. In spite of you seeming to be beautiful, smart, interesting and talented in the eyes of your FRIENDS [ - bear with me MM readers, I had to talk myself into feeling worthy], He Is Just Not That Into You. Yes. You. NOT INTO. Get it? No, are you really getting it? Yes. Good. Now, move on and think of someone who *does* deserve as much admiration and love as others: Yourself.

      Slow resistance wins the war.

      They don’t need to be reminded that I’m great.

      You deserve to be with someone who is awesome to you all the time.

      —————-
      There you go o fabulous blog readers, just in case this helps someone else out there.

      • We are too similar. Your checklist = my mental run through whenever separation anxiety hits. Your letter to Pisces 12 months ago = my letter to Pisces 12 months ago minus living on other side of country double emphasis on the “He’s just not that into you!”.

        My only addition to the list is a reminder to myself that there isn’t a single guy from my past I would touch again let alone reconsider getting back together with.

        • Not just that, but I am glad I am done with them, because that has opened new doors. That will continue happen until you have meet the one you are supposed to meet.

      • very helpful and sooo true.. what is it about pisces anyway? :S could take your letter/list almost word for word. he’s just nearly 5 years younger. and I would add that staring across the room at one another, failing to hit the ball (did I mention he’s a sportsman?) and being the reason for that (that’s what his friends said), doesn’t mean a thing when he doesn’t talk to you on his own. *have my fingers crossed for the time when venus retro-shadowzone is totally over*

          • Crumbs! I have enough trouble handling myself. My fam’s half air and earth, plus one lil fireball. I was always, like, oh poor lonely water sign, but sheesh imagine if there were more!

      • thank you so very much for for a great post that was an arrow hitting the bullseye for me….”slow resistance wins the war”, i certainly hope so.
        north node in aries and south node conjunct jupiter uranus pluto in the 7th.
        pisces venus rising. i have (had) it pretty bad, too. thanks again.
        ps, esp what you wrote after the 6th affirmation, that is new for me, how i get stuck, maybe (the 7th, i guess)

        • Hey, ok, cool. Also remember that I wrote some of that stuff based on my history with very incompatible types – overlooking all sorts of warning signs and falling into bed with them anyway. Not that I fell into bed with this one, but I wanted to make sure I was aware of the territory before I started imagining up any romantic flights of fancy :)

      • Speaks volumes to me! (helped alot). Couldn’t have put it better myself! No seriously! My situation very similar… ‘he’s not into you’ was my mantra to move on.
        Awesome write up. I thought you were in my head for sure. thank you PI.

    • Would anyone else agree that this sort of approach is also kinda a bit depressing too? It doesn’t leave any room for hope or joy, or holding out that (pleasant) expectations might be fulfilled for once. it’s like having a 5 year old kid full of joy and excitement every day and making them clean their rooms and learn to read when they just want to play in the sun with their friends. fck i hate saturn and reality and all the tepid, tasteless shit that goes with it. sigh again.

      • Sure Pi – agreed. Some of the behavioral therapies would say: ‘police those thoughts’; ‘work on it for 30 mins then move on’. It’s again about saturn – that hog of the therapy limelight – draw boundaries around the deep, hard work and in the other moments, cultivate joy, good friends, self esteem etc. Having experienced several addictions, I can attest that there is a clear line between mainly living your addiction, and mainly living soberly.

  5. This is one exam I’d pass with flying colours :)
    Saturn opp my natal Aries:- left the ex bang on my degree last June and have set up home as solo mum and am thriving sans l’hommes.
    Throughout this period a mysterious karmic connection created a love zombie of me and I was faced with the fact I choose relationships with emtionally unavailable men in order that I can avoid my own intimacy issues. That was the lesson here. Now I know what is on the menu when Saturn hits my 8th house in Scorpio.

      • You too Pi – I will read that book you recommended just so I have it to hand for the *next time.

        • yeah, see what you think, it all made a lot of sense for me, if they write books about these things I guess I am not the only one ;)

  6. i have learned SO MUCH from this, amplified by pluto on my venus in early 2010. i feel like i’ve known real love but i also feel like i understand the concept of partnership better and the two are definitely not the same thing.

    • Guys, for someone who hasn’t had a partnership for a while, can you explain what you mean? Do you mean the fact that a good partnership has boring bits in it?

      • I think the idea is that love happens easily – you love someone or you don’t. It’s an emotion. but a functioning partnership has practical implications – things have to work on a day to day basis. How does the couple resolve disagreements, who picks up the dry cleaning, who takes the dog to the vet, how you care for each other etc. At least, that;s how I see it.

    • I’ve been doing the Pluto/Venus transit also along with Saturn in Libra … not an easy transit but it sure does open your eyes yes? I completely agree on getting the concept of partnership. I’ve also become much more aware of the enormity of people escaping themselves through relationships. What better way to avoid yourself than diving into someone else. It’s epidemic!. lol Doing the work on oneself is the most important and the relationships on all levels (love, friendship, work etc) can be sweeter for all.

      • Oh I see what you’re saying, and I agree. Just because you love someone,that is no indicator whatsoever that you are meant to be together. It just means you love them. For a partnership you also need compatibility, similar desired path ahead to tread, and so much more.

        thanks for clarifying

    • Agreed! I hope you dont mind my little rant here… I got married in 2009 after a 5 year preliminary period and our “love” has since simmered into a mutual respect for each other. If anything Saturn in Libra has helped to keep the lines open and we discuss the terms of the “contract” quite often. This has worked for the most part but the initial fire is burning too low now. Its such an effective and comfortable arrangement I wonder if we can rekindle some intimacy since the allure left the building a long time ago! Saturn in Scorpio will be the real test for me…

      • OH, please keep us posted Hathor’s Horns! I now sometimes wonder if I could have tried rekindling my former partnership instead of walking away. ( In that case all my goals for the future changed and I grew a lot so yes, it was right to leave.) But my life is pretty much what it will be now so with the next and final partnership I need to know about getting through the routine like bits (The Gemini in my chart hates boredom and routine)

        • I hear you Gemstar! I too have Gem rising and in Venus so I’m also insanely flirtatious which is fun but gets me into trouble sometimes…I crave new encounters is all. Hubby likes his routine but is super open minded so hopefully we can keep a good thing going.

  7. i have learned a lot about unconditional love in the last few years. things my family never taught me. I feel more loved now than I ever have in my life. Like someone is listening – and actually hearing – cares what happens and accepts who I am and isn’t trying to make me fit their idea of who I should be. For jupiter pluto uranus conjunct IC and sun that’s big. I’m ready to tell saturn to sling its hook tho I’m over it.

    • Saturn through Libran 4th house also found me a house made of stone with mad security and many keys!

      • oh..that sounds divine! except my propensity for losing keys means i would attempt to simplify to one master key. except for all of the secret passageways and rooms :D

        • hehe I’m not quite living the priest-hole dream yet hon. Give me another 14 years and I reckon I’ll b there tho : o) The uranian in me will demand facial recognition over keys tho. Oh how uranus fought saturn’s trawl/thrall.

  8. oh – its all mashed up with saturn trans my 8th, which is almost 100% in libra. kinda like a plot line that is finally nearing some sort of ease-out after the LZ peak seen here a few weeks ago. In short – Oct 2009, broke up with long term, double piscean muso then 3 x flings with “boundaries” written all over them – a pisces, a scorp and a gemini. then the old toro flame (@pi are we in the same movie??) who is currently inscribed on a bit of paper in the freezer only to be glimpsed when I open the door for a voddy. consequently I have subscribed to MM’s scorping so maybe i’ll be ahead of the game this time :)

    • Sounds like some interesting experiences and wisdom gained, quintile… nothing is wasted, as they say.

      How does the freezer principle work? For the toro, I mean. I know how it works for the vodka :)

      • Oh freezer way works, I did it for a Qi Vampire and I thank quintile and Domestic Triffid every day since then. I don’t know how or why, but it cuts obsessive annoying thoughts.

        Domestic Triffid’s description is copied below to give full credit. I didn’t have a personal item but later Domestic Triffid told me a pic would work.

        Domestic Triffid
        on July 12, 2012 at 7:41 pm said:
        Hmmmm… I have another trick, and its an old one – the Witch Bottle.

        On a waning moon: Take a personal item of that person. Put it in a bottle, cap the bottle and seal it with wax. say out loud, with conviction, loudly “So-and-so I banish you” three times (the old way is “So-and-so I banish thee, So mote it Be” which rhymes, which is nice ) and then bury the bottle under your threshold. Or right by your front door.

        The modern way (which works – I’ve used it) is to take a teensy thing of that person’s (hair is ideal for this) and freeze it in an ice-cube tray. Keep it in a zip loc bag in the back of the freezer. Fear blackouts

        Please note – these methods don’t hurt that person – it simply repels/freezes them out of your life.

        It works better if you find it all funny Nothing kills fear, angst and anger like humour.”

        • Thanks, Quadrupled (and DT). I will copy this and keep it for future reference. I’m relieved I don’t need it at the mo.

          *Fear blackouts* lol

    • ahaha toro flames. yes. i didn’t need to freeze mine, he managed to excise himself from any social interaction quite well on his own. Cold turkey if you will, but not frozen…

      • :) :) on fire tonight lads and lasses – great comments all round! ah yes @crysalis experience – so true – everyone is on a different *makes quote signs with fingers* journey. I think I’ve learned it finally – but weird thing is that LZ behaviour really only kicked in with progressed sun in scorpio – like 15 years ago! only 15 more to go…geez.

  9. mystic this is not saturn soz but is it possible for you to teach us about progressed mars please? If I hadn’t fuqd up my knees falling over I’d be on them begging for it. Mine is conjuncting IC pluto uranus etc and meanwhile neptune is opposing natal mars in virgo and this defcon vibe is unsuited to reconnaissance in the fog. I am also living where my mars and neptune cross astrocartography wise and am uber paranoid about poisonous spiders and quit my gig that involved travel on boats to get to and from. Seriously. I started having panic attacks on that stupid boat. I mean I know this sounds crazy but I got a really bad feeling on that tub.

  10. Libra MC, here. Finding balance, more everyday…I am becoming the person I always hoped I would be. I love expanding my mind and learning new science and metaphysics. (Sun/Ur/Pl Virgo 9) I love being my own boss, (ex had stellium in 2) staying up late to work, basically doing my own thing, my own way. No garbage tv or ridiculous angry psycho rants. I love the quiet.

    Talk is cheap – walk the talk Romeo ! Pass- Agg fuqers: talk to the hand. Racists will be taken down, no quarter.

    Moon conj Saturn in Libra message for my fave Cappy Moon gal – Sweets – Love ya, and thanks for reading hon xo big hugs you’re awesome !

  11. there’s been no relationship of the partnership variety since saturn got into libra. I — and my natal mars in libra in 2nd — have been profoundly unhappy about it though i didn’t need a 3 year drought to tell me that, i’ve known that my whole life so i’m a little confused about what the test will be.

    • Same here. I didn’t learn anything because there was no relationship to learn from. nada. Saturn in Libra brings dearth for me.

      • Actually I take that back. Saturn regarding partnerships at least this time around was more about BUSINESS partnership and not any love stuff. Libra is my 10th house after all. I was hoping for love stuff because that’s all i really care about since starving people only care about food when they are starving even if they had a million dollars if the million can’t be used on buying food.

        –I learned be careful and choosy about who you share your money with and who you build your empire with.

        –Be responsible and a fair business partner. accept no less from the other.

        –A written contract makes everything nice and easy clean-up. Oral contracts are messy. If in doubt get it in writing.

        –Don’t let friendships muddle your business sense.

  12. Saturn – stomping on my 7th house since late 2008. When it is out of Libra, my 7th house lessons will be over. The amount of blood spilled while gutting down my relationship history…

    1. Boundaries are a must – especially if you have any contact between Venus and Neptune (this duo opposes in my natal chart)

    2. Self-respect saves you at the end of the day. Learn it, if you don’t know what it is, read its descriptions, work on it. In 2008, I had no idea what self-respect meant, in 2012 I defend my core values with my claws and kicks if necessary.

    3. As with all affairs Saturn rules, it helps to keep track of your progress: spreadsheets, notebooks filled with your inane and brill thoughts, activities. So you can go back and recognize patterns (My Gem Sun/Mercury can work emo labyrinths by writing and connecting dots)

    4. Don’t worry about the perfect guy coming or not. Love yourself, your time in this life is limited too. Why hang your happiness onto someone else’s shoulder?

    5. About AWOL guys – consider these peeps appear in your life for you to learn something. As soon as you get the reason, you will quit obsessing about no-shows. Move on.

    6. By all means necessary, stay away from Qi Vampires – you know them.

    My experience: I learned detachment (Venus/Neptune likes to dissolve), when something is not working for me, I should stop it (Pisces rising prone to sacrifice), work on evolving self (Virgo Pluto in 7th house honored).

    I don’t know what to make my Libra Uranus in 7th house. But I know if things are not egalitarian in my relations, I run away. This is despite people saying me “you should learn to settle”. But why?

    • Don’t settle.. I cannot understand that concept. But great list. I hope your #5 will heal my heart even though I know the reason why my AWOL guy came into my life.

    • That’s a great list, rings so true. Its just the years of breaking down bad habits xx.

    • Thank you :-) If my experiences help anyone say “aha!”, great.

      Just don’t turn off your own light for someone else.

    • Excellent advice. Self respect really does save you. This has also been my lesson from Saturn in Libra. After all, if you don’t love and respect yourself, how can you possibly love anyone else?

    • What a great list, and great advice for those still trying to work through it all…..I think this should be a t-shirt (adapted for girls/boys, of course, lol)

      5. About AWOL guys – consider these peeps appear in your life for you to learn something. As soon as you get the reason, you will quit obsessing about no-shows. Move on.

      I absolutely agree with that 100%….realizing that every person who comes into your life is not “destined” to be there forever, really allows you to appreciate the moment.

  13. Saturn thank you – for me – I have been blissfully single for the first time in my life!!! This shit is awesome!! My best friend just moved to the apartment opposite mine accross a garden. A gemini and a pisces I mean.. what more could you want? – we have tin can telephones.

    Maybe being ruled by saturn, and having pluto on my ascendant – for me it’s all about all or nothing right now. Either something stunningly fabulous, or I’m quite fantastic on my own thanks.

    • I love hearing stories of how people are embracing new single-hood! This sounds like my perfect single life. As soon as I read Pisces and Gem opposite each other I thought, I bet the neighbours are already grumpy and slightly envious, listening to them talk and laugh all night. I’m a multi-conj Pisces with NN in Gem and I LOVE Gem energy. All that talking :) I actually feel my lungs expanding with air when I am around a simpatico Gem.

  14. Oh what I have learnt!!! I am a Libra sun sign and he was an Aries sun sign with a Libra moon. He has been cut down with the harsh realities of a marriage breakdown and losing custody of his two sons in a VERY bitter fight. So to lose himself, he drinks away his troubles and keeps company of cheap nights with women he doesn’t see twice. So I (unfortunately) want to help and of course save him because I care too much. He pulls me close then pushes me away so hard…he becomes distant. We haven’t spoken in 3 months all because i couldn’t keep my big mouth shut and try to force reality down his throat. He wasn’t ready to hear it. I know he was hurting and yes it was his way of dealing with his problems. The walls went up and I wasn’t allowed in. It still breaks my heart that there is sooo much distant between us. I’m scared to reach out again as I fear rejection. I should have taken it slow. That was my big lesson in saturn.

    • Libragal… Libra rising-gal.. here. I was in a similar situation. Please don’t beat yourself up. You care for him and tried to help heal his heart. Please do your best and let it go. Accept your feelings for him as good and know that not hearing from him is a good thing. He needs to digest what was said to him (space). He probably already agrees with what you said. My guy was the same way. He relied on his ex “pain” from 12 years ago. He used that excuse with me when he started getting close to me. So scared he is / was. I always let him go.. but it was painful. I wanted to hear his voice and see his smile.. but I couldn’t do anything about it. He would ignore me. That is one piece I cannot accept with people is when I am ignored. So, with my little 2 cents worth.. give it some time, let him come back and you work with how he handles things. Give him some time. I wanted my guy to heal so badly because he has such a great heart. It’s hard! Good luck!!

    • LibraGal

      I’m not saying i don’t have the odd mental distortion of my own, I’m working on things of my own, trust me. Not about guys. But I have to ask you, do you really want to sop around and be this guys nursemaid? Knowing that there is absolutely no guarantee that he will ever be with you? I would like to think that you should not blame yourself for opening your mouth, and you should know that it’s better to be with a guy who’s strong, ready, ready for you etc.

      Many have said it here. But you must remember mystic’s scorpio friend who said I won’t waste emotion/crush on him unless he’s at the door with his dick out? ie wants you and is willing to act on that.

      • Hi Gemstar.. I have been in the same situation as Libragal so I understand where she is coming from… and I have to say “there is no guarantee any guy will be with you. No matter whether he is “playing the game society expects” or not. There is just no guarantee. That is why I kinda support her in doing what she is doing as long as she is not beating herself up. Take this moment with this guy as a time to deal with the feelings you are reacting to and learn as well and hope he is learning something from her to help him grow (Libragal giving him some harsh realization). Why do we always attack guys (dump them when they don’t react how we want them to) if they are trying to learn to love too. Yes, I can understand that if a guy is literally abusing you whether it is physical or psychologically but why can’t we give them a change to say hey “this one needs help, I am strong because I know I love him so let’s see if I can make a difference with him”… I have not seen my guy in 9 months. I have treated him with love and care and will always love him. If he doesn’t want to learn how to love then we shouldn’t be together but I think he was learning and it may take some time. But I am also preparing myself for the complete opposite reaction too. I know I was learning a lot while I was with him. But I did not stop enjoying my life when we lost connection. I am moving on but asking God to help him because he deserves to feel complete love. I felt it with him so I know he has it. Hopefully Libragal feels that with her guy and she is helping realize that too after his major life changing situation. Just a thought!

        • Hi Virgo Ellie

          Thanks for your your reply. I think we’ll continue to think differently on this, but that’s okay! It’s great to listen and talk to each other, and I really appreciate the space here to do it.

          I think you are very okay with your situation
          therefore it is perfect for where you’re at.

          First of all, i don’t make my decisions about potential partners based on society’s rules! I don’t need chocolates or flowers. I do need the guy to be emotionally and physically present though – willing and equally as into loving and pleasing me, as i am into loving and pleasing him.
          I think there is a guarantee that someone is going to be with you: the fact that they ARE with you, they are into you and are committing and their actions show it. My point was not about whether it will last, it was about whether they are ever going to be your actual loving boyfriend in the first place! I just wanted Libra Gal to know that there are PLENTY of guys ready to be her boyfriend NOW, and she doesn’t have to heal them first or worry that she blew it by trying to heal him in the ‘wrong’ way. You don’t have to earn love. You just give it and receive it. When you’re ready! With someone also ready.

          Just saying, if she wants a nursemaid, tragic love thing where she possibly may never be fulfilled, okay. Go for it. But if she wants appreciation joy love sex friendship, being a couple – then keep the nurses outfit for special occasions but drop the whole nursemaid routine and let a healthy guy love her! Doesn’t mean the other guy is not loved by you, but you don’t invest anything in him, you invest in someone who can invest right
          back.
          The only reason I mentioned it is I have tried both methods, and not banging my head against a brick wall has proved so much better in my case!! Its like the guys pointed out above: the existence of love does not mean there is yet , ever will be or should be a relationship. You can love more than one person. I’m saying: love someone who wants a relationship, if you yourself want a relationship. Again it’s about what you want. And I know u are clear about what you want Ellie.
          Respect xx

          • Hello Gemstar and Vrigo Ellie,

            I would like to thank you both for your input. You both clearly are passionate and yes agree this is the perfect forum to do it. With regards to ‘my situation’ all I am saying is that Saturn has taught me that you can’t push someone else to learn a “lesson” when they are not ready. Saturn is a hard task master because of the lessons he wants us to learn. Matt clearly isn’t ready to learn the lesson. Everyone needs their own time. My only regret is that I pushed. In retrospect, I don’t like people pushing me and I should not have pushed him. Yes I do miss him, but I have learnt to let you go. You can’t hold onto something that doesn’t want to be held. I wish him all the very best and I do wish he finds peace. Yes I too would welcome a healthy relationship with a man that is ready. Its not like I’m not open to it. Relationships come and go. Each teach you a lesson. So thank you again for you both have given me a great deal to think about. Wishing you both a rainbow xx.

  15. I had a return bout of Love Zombie-dom which struck quickly and deeply. And the good news…I got over it just as quickly when I recognised what it was. And thanks to someone on this blog (sorry I’ve forgotten your name) I found out the word for this experience. It’s called Limerence. Go ahead and google it. There’s a fantastic book by Dorothy Tannov called Love and Limerence. A must read for all Love Zombies and recovering Love Zombies.

    And I lalso learnt that

    Passion is a beautiful, fleeting mistress but it never ends well

    Quadrupled is spot on – it’s all about self-respect. Hang onto it tight – it is the lifeboat in a stormy sea of emotional upheval

    • LOL! I lived a LZ life for two years straight (2008 – 2010).. a late learner :-)

      • Limerence involves intrusive thinking about the limerent object (only from wikipedia but none-the-less how apt for the LZ debate??)

  16. I learned that I don’t need or want a relationship, like, a one-on-one romantic sexual relationship. I felt like I came out the other side of something…..I’m not always good at putting things into words…… Anyway, this realization will probably be driven home to me further as Saturn now begins to transit my 5th house, supposedly a time when romance would be hard to come by anyway?

    At the same time, other types of relationships, friendships, housemates, workmates, have been the way I’ve done a lot of learning with this Saturn cycle in Libra. It’s been tough, but sort of impersonally-personal at the same time. What I mean is it’s played out with people I don’t care about that much. Kind of lonely, too, though, and have felt very distant from people during this time..

    Thanks for the reminder about Venus moving into Cancer soon….that’s gonna light up my Cancer Ascendant, oppose my Cap Venus, square my Aries Saturn, with all the attendant Saturn/Uranus/Pluto transits to all of this……grand cross of god-knows-what coming up!
    When I see stuff like this coming my instinct is to just try to lay low……
    I wonder if this will touch off more of the personal attacks I have endured throughout most of this year……..? I am reminded of a quote I saw today that was something like ‘Never try to explain who you are to people who are committed to misunderstanding you’.

    • Another thing I was able to put to rest by the end of this Saturn in Libra time is this dang telepathic connection I had with someone that had gone on for about seven years (part of a Saturn cycle). I feel relieved and free………………

    • Hi AoA :) I had a similar experience, maybe cos Cancer Asc too?

      Saturn in Libra was a slow stroll from my 3rd to 4th house, closing into a square with my natal 1st house Saturn. I love being alone, but this was one of the loneliest periods of my life – living alone in a country where I wasn’t entirely fluent in the language (by choice, no less!)

      There was no one-on-one relationship the whole time, but all the other relationships brought lessons. So now, my “guidelines”. No mutual respect? Goodbye. You can do whatever you like, but if you try to make me behave in what I consider an undignified way… Goodbye. Try to make me behave out of integrity with my core principles? Goodbye. I realised implementing this means I won’t have a strong core network of friends for a while, but what better time for an overhaul… Zap Zone Scorping and all.

      the most heartbreaking bit is to have to drift apart from someone I’ve known for almost 18 years, but he showed me that I needed to do this – tonight, he told me the new paradigm for marriage was to have a little fun on the side, so I should explore things with my married ex, who recently contacted me. I have zero interested in him, though I can imagine how and why these relationships happen, but it’s just not my style. Sun conj Saturn just checks people off – married? no. gay? no. It’s automatic! :D

      • Oooh, that can be isolating, being in a country where you don’t know the language well. Sounds like you’ve used this period well, though, and came through with some great insights into yourself and your values and cultivated a more aligned relationship with yourself. Can never go wrong with that!

        • I just realized that this period of time with Saturn in Libra has also coincided with some other transits (probably primarily Pluto transiting my 6th house), that have brought me a health problem that left me with no energy and no sex drive.
          I had never experienced no sex drive before in my life, but I think the gift in that was that I could step back and be more objective about romantic/sexual relationships because I had (still feel this way, really) no interest in them.
          So, again, kind of a lonely period, but kind of a really content period, too. Man, it’s really a relief not to feel a burning desire!

  17. a while ago, someone here – or someone quoted in one of Mystic’s posts -said something very close to:

    never make a priority out of someone who sees you as an option.

    apologies to whomever penned that little gem if I have misquoted you.

    says it all, really.

    • my lovely wise cancerian gf shared that with me – Never make someone a priority, when they only make you an option.

  18. Weird,.. November 2009 was when I had to let go of my guy. It was the first time a guy hurt me but I walked away not feeling like a victim and knowing I loved him. There was nothing I could do to get him to love me back.. but in my heart I was happy with him. Then I met someone else. Thought it would help me get over my “love”.. but no. I ended up reconnecting to my “love”… in an indirect way. Decided to start my life over which meant moving to his area. Not for him and we had a discussion that we came to an agreement on and I was relieved. But I moved. Well, we got together when I got there. Have been together on and off but he was getting closer. In my world we were together for about 1 and half years. Then November 2011 we had a disconnect. That is the last time I saw him. We are connected via FB so I know a little of what is going on. So, what did I learn about love. That when I have found someone I love.. I know I love them and always will. I can’t make him love me back but I am at peace knowing that I had a good time with him and I can appreciate what he gave to me. “A lesson in love”. I wish it would continue to grow as it was.. slowly .. but we were growing together. I unfortunately feel he is coming back.. but maybe the next couple of days will bring truth to my day dream. If it is over.. I am done. I won’t do it again. I would rather be alone for the right reasons than with someone for the wrong reason… settling just to be with someone.. nope!! In my opinion relationships are just not made for everyone. Yes, I would have like to have gotten married before I leave this earth but maybe it’s not gonna happen. He is a good guy. I wish he knew that! <3

    • Oh.. another piece I am learning is taking care of me. Making me first on my list.. what makes me happy so that I can be helpful to others. No one is going to save me but me!

  19. This is the stuff of solid GOLD pheonixing! My Saturnine Libran sentiments entirely. Thanks all x

  20. This Cap is a Libra rising so Saturn has really made me understand that being an independent, awesome bachelorette is not only about knowing I can rely on ‘me’ more, it’s also how I like to be seen. Independent and awesome. I think for many years, my Kataka moon ‘neediness’ made me so soggy in relationships. Now I know myself so much better and after Saggo long-term relationship ended at the end of 2010 (and shag buddy Leo Boy last year turned out to be a dud), I’m ready for a proper grown-up relationship. And I will be awesome in it.

    And I will retain much more independence because I kinda like how it suits me ;)

    Oh, and I changed my posting name. “Equilibrium Girl” seemed so calm and compromising (like my Lib asc) but with Mars transiting my natal Pluto, and as Pluto transits back and forth over my Cap sun, fuq yeah I’m fired up, restless and evolving. Hence “Evolvicorn”. Feels right for right now.

  21. Here Iam sitting out the front of Hungy Jacks after being hit an abused by my husband of 28 years what a lesson. I should of left him years ago. He has bruised my leg my arm , hit me in the jaw and says its all my fault . He is a coward and no good. Wish me luck guys.

    • maria you know you have to do whatever you can to get out of that situation – asap!

      • Thank you all so much for you kind words of support. Iam staying in a motel tonight with my daughter. My husband rang her and said he was leaving. God i hope he does !

    • Maria.. what can we do to help you? We are here to help you take the next step on getting out of your situation! Let’s do it together!

      • Go girl, don’t stay another minute, i braved a simillar situation 20 years ago with 2 little ones in tow…. it’s hard, but each day on your own is better and the sun does shine in the end…
        If you need help just ask and someone will help, theres more of us out there too lean on and share the pain and new hope…. :)

    • Hi Maria

      Sometimes we can start to believe untrue things that misguided lost souls tell us, as they hurt us or themselves.

      I would like to suggest that a First step could be not believing anything that comes out of an abusers mouth. Yes they have their soft times, yes you are not perfect and they can tell you chapter and verse all your faults, no? Tell me I’m wrong. BUT, even if you are not perfect and they have their nice moments, YOU STILL DESERVE TO BE TREATED WITH RESPECT. Knowing that will give you the courage to stay away when you leave. Everyone, even an imperfect person, deserves a basic level of civility, politeness and respect. So forgive yourself for anything you personally feel guilty about, and believe you deserve a new start. Even if you’ve made mistakes.

      Just thought I’d chime in with that, as listening to an account of your faults can sometimes be a hook to believing you should stay in a very unhealthy situation.

      Peace xxx

      • I second that: a paper trail will help you, Maria. Just file a report. Get pics of your injuries, too. Typically, all of this can be done in an emergency room, btw.

        You are acting as the most wonderful role model for your daughter by leaving an abusive relationship. Even if she’s not sure what to make of it right now, she’ll get it when she’s older. Trust your gut, and KUDOS!

  22. things are certainly heated already as far as I can see..as a Libra, all I want to do is watch movies and get away from the crazy out there..and just be quiet..
    Mystic, you are awesome, thank you for keeping it real!

  23. Yes, we’ll I have Saturn natally in my 7th in cap, so sat in libra sq that, as an Aries sun sat opposed and it also sq my mars in cancer first house. Libra is my 4th house with only my true node there. This is while Pluto has been conj my natal Saturn in cap and hence deepening the whole box.
    It’s been a difficult and demanding 2 years in all my relationships though somehow I’m coming thru it and looking forward to it being pretty much done by November . UrAnus conj my mercury and Mc has been my guide thru the toughest times …namely that mars retro….shudder…

      • I thought the UrAnus was intentional :D

        and yes but there is something about the psychologically liberating effects of that planet which helps us feel less fettered by the other transits. imo.

  24. I’ve learnt that I prefer to be alone than screwed-up by clueless zombie friends with benefits who text message me for a “a coffee” together.

    • Me too Molly! I have also learned that an orgasm a day keeps the doctor a day. Investing in a really good vibrator is worth it and that i really actually can NOT tolerate gluten.
      and that if you are going to be a cougar, never look at their Facebook page because 1000 hot female “friends’ can be a bit disconcerting.

      * gluten free diet. * no booty calls from zombie men * a lelo

      • HAHAHAHA ;) wow!
        thank God, I never ever made an account on FB ’cause I knew from unsuspected times that FB was an Evil tool from the Dark sides just like my Italian ex Prime Minister (Mr “B.” aka the Low Puppet Libra)..
        …secondly, I never really liked vibrators, ’cause I feel them to …mh..”woody”??
        I have pluto in the 3rd, and my hands are…you know,… just wonderful:) …and plus I can Reiki on when needed:)!!!
        thirdly, I suspect the word ‘cougar’ was invented by ex not even “pseudo” intellectual fellows to try to encapsulate women’s freedom and identities. just another clichées, in a society ruled by telly and reality-shows.
        (OMG, I think I’m becoming too post-feminist here.
        never mind, don’t take too seriously, LOL, I’m just re-reading Erica Jong :| ) basically, I agree with you! and I loved your fiercy vibrant roaring lioness take on this!
        :) xxx

        • I first read Fear of Flying when I was 21 years old, and I’m certain that it saved my life! Team Jong :)

        • yeah I’m not fond of vibrator usage except with partners either. You can’t get any energy off of them or give any back. pointless. Better to go cold turkey and have nothing imho.

          i wish i could put myself in stasis and make myself a robot so i never need anyone.

          • I don’t wish you that at all! :)
            how could ever a Libra make herself a robot (although Electric ;) :)!) no stasis for loving Libra but Eternal Love and All the rest of Bliss :)
            this is what I wish for you xxx

  25. This may sound a bit odd, but its not so much about what Saturn has taught me about love, partnerships or relationships; its about what Saturn has forced me to learn about myself within love, partnerships or relationships (of all kinds). Its made me face some of my own issues, and therefore taught me to love and respect myself….so the type of man I’m attracted to is much different than a few years back. Hopefully that makes me a better partner. And I don’t love-zombie out because my identity is tied up in being “loved”….if its not the right guy, my needs aren’t met, he’s not into me, etc….ok. I’ve probably got a good book to read, anyway lol. Quality over quantity. Saturn has also made me pare down/revise my list of priorities and “deal breakers” (always efficient, lol), and I think its made my expectations of myself and others much more reasonable and suited to me and my relationship style.

    • that sounds not odd at all – my saturn returns (opposed venus and trined mars) was all about this kind of self-examination and once that was over things became pretty awesome love-wise. I think you have to do your own thing and make your own foundations secure solo before you can even think about letting someone else be a part of your life – that is if you even want someone in it at all. Otherwise you attract people who want to be around the person you are when you’re not quite sussed and there’s seldom room for tandem let alone individual growth from there. And that’s what I think a balanced relationship is – consciously growing and changing together. Evolution. Congrats on your hard-earned self-awareness TED – saturn doesn’t make anything easy.

      • You are quite right – if you aren’t OK in your own solo existence, relationships don’t fix that! This Saturn transit has made me look at the things I really want from life, and for a while relationships really weren’t on the list, lol. And that is OK.

        “Otherwise you attract people who want to be around the person you are when you’re not quite sussed and there’s seldom room for tandem let alone individual growth from there.”

        An aspect I hadn’t thought about in that quote….indeed, I can look back and see people who came into my life who were attracted to some weak spot I had, some issue that made me vulnerable, who were looking for that quality to exploit (for lack of a better term). Qi vamps of some kind?

        I’ve learned that if I had those types hanging around, and causing me distress, then its just a sign that I had something I need to be more aware of/heal…but that does not excuse someone else for being an a*shole. :)

  26. I didn’t put it together until you said it, MM–in early 2010, my domestic world and partnerships underwent massive upending: while pregnant, I realized I was in love with my next door neighbor and subsequently observed all desire to continue to work at my emotionally co-dependenet, joyless marriage disintegrate…. I learned MUCH. I am still learning much. To sum up: To thine own self be true, FIRST; love yourself. SECOND, grasping at what is truly yours is redundant & unnecessary. If there is a soul connection between you and another, it will manifest itself; it’s just a matter of time–don’t push! Third, “where there is great love, there are great miracles” (Willa Cather wrote that, right?). I have witnessed miracles of transformation, both physical & spiritual, unfold in the lives of several people in my circle, as a result of what went down between early 2010 and today.

    BIG lessons for me. I risked everything to uphold the discovery that I AM WORTHY OF JOY. I grew up. I lived on my own for the first time. I pursued my dream job and got it. I finally saw that a healthy relationship is NOT about splitting responsibilities, but about fully assuming responsibility for ALL ONE’S OWN CRAP, and lovingly expecting one’s partner to do likewise. The relationship I am in now is better than anything I’ve ever experienced–loving, grown-up, and passionate but drama-free.

    It’s not all sorted out yet, the enormous learning curve appears to be leveling off. So thanks, MM for identifying the trigger, and… thank you, Saturn.

    • Thanks for those words Beebee. I take encouragement that you have a grown up enjoyable drama free relationship.

      Good for you

  27. OK. So, the question is what have we learned about love since late 2009?

    Hm. OK. I’ve learned I need it and I want it and keeping people at arms length may have been keeping me safe, but also very lonely.

    So I began letting people in (friends of all ages) to see the real me and it’s been delightful. I’m now ready to date and let in a wonderful man.

    I’m still learning the Astrology talk and wisdom but by following all of your posts and looking at my chart: I have mercury and venus in libra in the 6th house. And I sure am now into having love in my everyday life. And balance, harmony, beauty as well. Sooo ready :-)

    Thanks Mystic and all commenters for supporting the growth of your fellows. xx

  28. This Saturn thing has been on my Libra stellium in the 5th house. I’ve learned the importance of boundaries and that as a woman, protecting myself and enforcing my boundaries is as essential has having skin cover my body!

    Peculiarly enough, I’ve also learned that passion is very important in a relationship; it’s just as important as the emotional connection. Before the Saturn transit, I was starting to think that settling was not a bad thing but now my heart has changed that notion.

    However, Saturn hasn’t been all gloom & doom… It now trines my midheaven and ASC, and this time has been one of the most productive times in my personal and professional life :)

  29. 1. Don’t Settle. Even if there is societal pressure (my mother) to be married by my age.

    I was going to Settle, but didn’t, phew for both of us.

    2. Financial security is great, but money can’t buy me love…self sufficiency plus equal partnership is the ideal.

    3. Work on my own intimacy issues so I am not attracted to emotionally unavailable men.

    4. Love Zombie-ism cured. Dang, I had it bad. Who was that girl?

    5. No more drama, you need to walk your talk, otherwise adios – friends and romantic possibilities.

    6. Return to simplicity and natural products, especially in beauty products.

    • Absolutely agree on the don’t settle thing. Until late last year, Saturn was on my Pluto in my House o’ Love and that seemed to be the lession it wanted to teach me.

      Obviously I’d paid too much attention to all those stupid books and commentators that like to say mid-30s women are too picky and should just ‘settle’, because I found myself in a relationship with a nice enough chap who I really was trying to settle for. That relationship became almost totally unbearable for me almost as soon as Saturn changed signs – by early 2010 I broke it off knowing that I’d much prefer to be by myself than with someone who was less than 100% right for me. I didn’t grieve that relationship for even one minute – it was so apparent it was the right thing to do (for him and me). The bigger thing for me though was that I made my peace with being by myself and I accepted that kids might not be part of my future.

      Naturally, that was the cue for someone amazing to come into my life in late 2010…

  30. lessons abound…

    1. you cannot change someone. even if what is wrong with them is as clear as day and you think telling them will change their life and they’ll love you forever. the truth is, most people find being psychoanalyzed by their lover QUITE repellent. AND if they don’t know something about themselves, they are probably actively resisting it. Try and bring it up and prepare to be resisted yourself. Not to mention the old adage about loving someone for who they are right now and not who they would be if only ….

    2. which brings me to: you can’t save someone. Sorry. You can get them to depend on you like they depend on their [booze, pills, moms, heroin, jesus]. But even the most neptuned out druggy can still cop to the fact that he doesn’t actually love you and will drift away…only to return when he’s especially desperate. that ain’t love. know it!

    3. someone can love you for who you are RIGHT now! can you believe it? even if you’re not where you want to be, not who you’re supposed to be…as long as you know you’re worthy of it, it IS possible. You don’t have to be a perfect person to deserve love.

    4. the real thing is way better than the obsessive-why-can’t-I-have-you thing. it really, really, really is.

    5. NICE GUYS CAN BE GOOD IN BED, TOO. why did it take me so long to believe that?

    honestly, without saturn’s lessons, i would never have had the wisdom and experience to even appreciate or be attracted to my present dude. and while i still have no idea what might happen between us (being saturn-real about it), i at least know we have enough mutual love and respect not to fug each other over! Hoo-rah!

  31. Ah…November 2009…the last time I had sex. Good times. Sort of. Hope Saturn gives hot sexy quizes. I’m feeling like I could teach Saturn a thing or two these days. lol

  32. When a guy says he wants to be needed more, it is actually a clever way of saying he wants to control you. Always maintain independance.

  33. Gran and Mum were right about ALL things relationship. Men will and do chase you if they like you, good men wait, laughter is the most important blah blah

    but

    They were wrong about what happens in the bedroom :)

    x

  34. Right now, I’m only thinking one thing: However you are right now is the best and most rightest place for you to be.

    Because you can always change your mind about yourself tomorrow. Or today.

    And that sometimes, the lessons you think you’re learning aren’t even the ones your life is teaching you. I think self-trust is important, and knowing that instinctively even your worst moments have truly served you well.

  35. I learned that equality in relationships is a must for me and avoided them when younger because I feared the old-fashioned model.
    Took a long time to figure out I could create what suited me.
    Having the right, willing partner is another thing but possible !

    Good to practice this with friendships and co-workers and family.

  36. Great reading you guys.

    Libra in 8th house for me, with Uranus there…and I have learnt

    1) just as the human spirit can’t survive in a vacuum neither can a relationship so stop pretending and get some air.

    2) Exactly what peeps have said above about – if it isn’t there between you or it isn’t mutual or doesn’t gel, so what? nothing wet about that, it’s the hard dry facts and you can build on that or let it crush you with the weight you can’t hold. SAturn=satupon if you let it.

    3)You can’t stop the music so don’t try to deny either yourself or another their pleasure.

    4) Egos are necessary in relationships but if you can take control of them yourself they can add to rather than destroy the magic of synthesis. i have realised I can treat my ego like a hairdo that i can wear differently everyday. ( easy for a multi gemini to say, perhaps)

    5) If you can’t stay friends with someone with whom it didn’t work out, don’t get bitter about it, instead let that space be filled with a solid confidence to stay friends with yourself in future no matter whether you are alone or with someone. If that makes sense.

    Saturns lessons can feel too harsh, but there doesn’t have to be a feeling of betrayal or loss of cool if you can reinvent your reality around what is ultimately more true. Saturn shows you where to invest. For me, it has been in me the last 12 months.

  37. Has anyone heard frank ocean’s song “bad religion?”. Sums up love zombie recovery. Or at least recognition. “Unrequited love is just a one man cult.”. I’ve found my true religion. First house libra lesson: my self worth. Now working on second house. Job interview in a void moon. I trust the Creative with a depth I never imagined. I am worth more than I ever imagined. Love is love. Love lost is opinion.

  38. I think what I have learnt can be summed up in these words form ‘Better Than’ by John Butler

    “All I know is sometimes things can be hard
    But you should know by now
    They come and they go
    So why, oh why
    Do I look to the other side
    ‘Cause I know the grass is greener but
    Just as hard to mow”

  39. I’ve learned to imagine lately, (and this is by no means always easy),
    that a man is meant only for me. He is his distinctly own guy.
    Spirit, soul, heart, and mind, past, experiences and more but his light & my light are meant for each other.

    Fooling around with a bunch of other dudes that aren’t even showing up leaves your guy out in the cold with his face pressed up against the window.

  40. Saturn in libra opposes my Sun, Venus, Chron in Aries in the eighth house. I am natal Uranus in Libra however Uranus is in Aries as everyone knows. If anyone has any idea how that translates I would appreciate the input.

    I am hoping that Uranus in Aries means a lot of forward movement and positive change for me. I imagine that having so many important planets. ( the sun ) natally opposing Uranus would mean being ” stuck” .

    I did just notice a repeating pattern. My relationships have sucked and ihave been terrible at them. I just decided that I have had enough in general and feel close to quitting for good. ( Not celibacy – at least not forever) All people are not cut out for all things. Maybe I am not so good at relationships. I crumble too easily and I hate conflict. I just want to be happy and enjoy the things I enjoy more fully while undistractedly building a life for myself. I just can’t decide if choosing that is a cop out. Like I am quitting and not for some noble reason. Even worse I don’t know if that’s what I really want I just think about it a lot.

  41. Big breakup. If it ain’t right, it an’t right. What’s meant to be is meant to be, what is for you will not pass you by, and if someone doesn’t want to commit now, don’t expect them to grow into the idea down the track. Peeps either want you, or they don’t. Very simple.

  42. When the stars do not align I run a hundred miles in the opposite direction. That’s Saturn in Libra.

  43. I’ve been thinking about this lesson, took a while but here it is.
    Relationships are conditional (gulp) and maybe love, as in successful lover relationships are also. There is a place for unconditional love, but its not in one on one relationships or can I say very rarely. We all have conditions. All of us. Thats quite hard for me to swallow, but I have.

  44. ha!
    Saturn exam=no multiple choice!

    Wow the pic, describes very well how Saturn is affecting me…Being all done up looking forward to a night on the town…and then being disappointed cause the man has to work late and is drained and then is not up for it and being stuck and cooped up at home with him or by myself(I can only do that so many days!). I need to go on an outing that isn’t walmart (the shopping cart haha) ugh…It will be truly amazing if we can get though this.

    This is one of my final lessons. I must say I’ve come a long way. Since 2010 my standards are higher and the man I have been with now that I have known since February of this year really is a catch. <3

    (22 degree Aries)

  45. What I’d really like to know now is thedifference between “incompatible” and “have things we have to work on” Aside from all the usual common sense (no hitting me or putting me down, etc.)

    Lord knows i’m not perfect…and neither is anyone else… But i have a hyper critical side (daughter of a virgo) and (sigh) am dreamy libra who wants something that may never come true…back when saturn was in my 7th i would just “work at it” forever, also known as beating a dead horse. These days i put up with no shit. But when do you know a horse is dead?