Virgo Does Vengeance

Filed in Moon in Leo, Virgo

older cheerleader“…When Laura Vikmanis’ husband ran off with a younger woman, the 39-year-old knew she needed something to cheer herself up. As she sat during the interval of a Cincinnati Bengals American football game watching the leaps and twirls of the young cheerleaders, her sister came up with an idea, join them. Three years on, Laura is a bona fide Ben Gal, and – at 42 – the oldest cheerleader in American sport. And the rights to her remarkable life have been bought by one of Hollywood’s biggest film studios…”


Okay so there is probably some feminist issue to do with cheerleaders and/or the kind of make-up that can be seen not just from the back seats of the stadium but from outer SPACE.

But i like Laura. It’s the style and zip with which she pulled herself out of a situation in which – let’s face it – some peeps just eat their emotions in donuts or bitch it up the rest of their lives. And many a woman in her scenario (just dumped, mother of two) would NOT want to go try out for something up against a troupe of 20 y.r.o.s  AND she got rejected first time around, went away, got fitter, foxier and more tan before coming back to give it another go.

So go Laura.


So she would have spread-sheeted all this. She would ensure that ex-hubby receives automatic email notifications of her movie contracts, offers to get her gear off for mens mags, increasing net worth, fan-mail from wanna-be cubs, inspirational Oprah-style interviews in which she wipes away a delicate tear with one of her acrylic talons (Opi China Glaze Sweet Revenge?) and says that no matter how much of a prick he is, she still respects him.

Moon in Leo. Well, that is a No-Brainer. Ask ANY Moon in Leo person you know or ask yourself if you have Moon in Leo: Have you ever fantasised about being a cheerleader?!  Or if you are a male Moon-in-Leo…oh, never mind.

Madame also has a multi-Libra conjunction: Mercury-Venus-Jupiter-Uranus in Libra.  She is doing a brilliant job with her Saturn transit: discipline, fitness and the financial challenge of having to deal with Hollywood $$$ and contracts.

So i reckon she Virgoed out with the kids/house and applied all her Libra to being Ms Courtesan/Hubby/in-law pleaser for ages. Then – wham – one day her Moon In Leo suffers a major blow to the ego a la her husband leaving her for the younger lass and VOILA – Virgo Does Vengeance.

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60 thoughts on “Virgo Does Vengeance

  1. Susie Sanchez (Oakland Raiders cheerleader) is younger (37 y.o. i think) but is a grandmother!

    and no, i would never want to be a cheerleader. good for her though! I actually tried out for football as a team member in high school but I’m Libra and would in no way be satisfied doing something that is a sideline show.

  2. Hmm. Am actually not surprised, I always thought Virgos were the stealth a-vengers of the zodiac, and specialize in the “clean” version i.e. less shadow, alcohol laced drunken communicaes, more raw dieting, power pointed work outs with time lined goals and discreetly adding lovers to the rotational on a well-oiled schedule.

    At least this is what I surmise from my Virgo Rising. :)

    While some DO verge on a few narky comments here and there – after all, there is no such thing as a St. Virgo, that’s just really awesome advertising, they conquer via organization and multi-tasking. Barring that, they take care of the contracts, think Kelsie Grammer’s ex walking away with bajillions.

    My Aqua Mad brother was married to a Virgo, cheated on her with BOTH her best friends, went on a mad spree of sluttage then decided to show up at her family home a decade later musing that perhaps really, they should try to work it out seeing how they’ve always maintained a good “working” relationship as co-parents and she’s always been there, etc etc. He sees an 8 yr old boy running around (they’d been separated 9) whom he curiously inquires about and is then informed this is in fact, the Virgo’s SON.

    Yes, with another man. In fact, my swim instructor. As to help her allay her grief I’d taken her along to my lap classes. She’d managed to get pregnant sans anyone knowing, gave birth overseas and hid it for almost a decade.

    Voila. Vengeance Virgo style.

    • That doesn’t sound like vengeance to me as much as Virgoan shame maybe? A Virgo birth indeed! What a story though, the ending is brill.

    • she MUST have something in cancer or scorpio. loving the story – it’s the kind of human frailty / cautionary tale that often manifests in my family – most often rearing its head around the time of Xmas day lunch festivities.

    • Good point, Andy..but I guess the best revenge isn’t even one that was specifically designed to be? It more shocked him that he’d had her pegged as someone who’d never get into such a situation – though I wasn’t at all surprised, I sort of always knew that her veneer of virtue was hmm.. a little porous?

      Personally, I think my brother should’ve GET OVA HIMSELF considering he schtupped BOTH her best friends??? Hello. It was just weird that she continued to depend on him for all the husband things i.e. repairs, money, etc – that part was a bit UN-Virgo IMO. So there was an odd co-dependence.

      And as if there wasn’t enough drama, the swim instructor and I had sort of a love-hate thing going on. We were constantly racing laps, doing diving exercises whilst verbally sparring outside the pool. He was a year older than me and she was the older woman – didn’t resent her for it at all since I would’ve killed him some way haha… She’s very feminine, very lovely, not uber smart but charming.

      Which was very opposite moi, haha.. now remembering that situation I think it’s odd that younger guys are attracted to me precisely for my opinions. But I think Swimmie and her had a real physical thing, I was frankly too much hard work. I wish it worked out though, it couldn’t have been easy keeping a child a secret.

  3. This made a 42 year old Virgo’s day….thanks Mystic for your beautifully quirky and creative take on astrology and life….

    • yeah it made my day too! And i’m not a virgo. I just love the positive reading (and linking it to astrology) AND it made me laugh out loud. Mystic does a good job, doesn’t she? x

  4. She’s lookin’ Good! All that Venus ruled Libra in her chart didn’t hurt, either! But Virgos are the masters at discipline, and discipline – well, she had to have it in spades to do that! great story.

  5. Three cheers to her but I’m a leo moon and I would be highly embarrased at any age to be a cheerleader!!

    • Also have moon in leo and I’ve fantacised about competing at the Olympics but never, ever wanted to be a cheerleader. See, it’s moon in Leo so you want to be the main game, not on the sidelines!

  6. I think she’s great. Cheerleading is a bit Urgh but it gets the point in folks faces especially loser husbands.

    Why why why!? Should we immediately go into victim/somebody done me something wrong mode? Ms once said earlier this year said “get hot get another”. So much better than unhealthy drilled into us behaviors that are so last century.

  7. Hey not to my taste but definitely like the lady’s style. Channels her bitchery into achievement.

    Query: the VirgoSkank … how is this possible?

    This one lives and works in a pigsty, sleeps with every man she meets while often despising them (not an exaggeration; this is her lifestyle choice as she also chooses to go out and meet people for this purpose), brags about her festy adventures and resulting STDs to her office mates, keeps her shoes on her desk, sometimes is trend-fashionable but usually looks trashy. Calls everyone sweetheart but is eternally angry barely below the surface. Drinks to blackout; eats cigarettes.

    I’ve always thought something tragic and damaging in the background, but she is in her 30s and it seems odd for a Virgo to deal in this way.

  8. I just said to my friend the other day everyday you feel lonely just exercise. You’ll accomplish way more!

    Of course you can’t always stuff it down but it’s more productive than eating or sobbing.

  9. Good for her! I would have gotten a law degree so I could help women like her win a decent alimony and really get revenge. But that’s just me.

  10. good on her if that’s her thing – personally am more for ‘out class’ ’em than ‘out show’ …….

      • class trumps ass lol – more glow, less show …. 😉

        • Yes this an awesome belief. I totally agree! Personally cheerleading is not my cuppa, so I’m not really wowed by this story. She does look beautiful for 42, though.

          • I have a GF that has that EXACT stomach – even post childbirth – the reality of how she maintains is more like a horror story …. & she’s in her 20’s.

            but good on the cheerleading 42 year old, if that’s what she wants, she’s go it in spades!! – as MM says – Virgo to the core :-)

            • “class trumps ass”–good one:)

              Not sure it always does, but in my book it does!

  11. Mystic, I love: “inspirational Oprah-style interviews in which she wipes away a delicate tear with one of her acrylic talons (Opi China Glaze Sweet Revenge?)”.

    That’s so vivid!

    I am completely unlike Laura in any way (I am brunette and bookish and do not grow my nails because they annoy me when I type), but I think she is just the picture of satisfaction!

    I watched Jenny McCarthy (used to go out with Jim Carrey) on Oprah the other day, and here is another really coiffed blonde and gym-ed up lady who, although completely nothing like me, I respect and think is pretty cool.

  12. i like cheerleaders because they distract all the kinds of people I want nothing to do with – more of them I say, it makes it easier to sort the wheat from the chaff.

    • hee hee, you hit the nail on the head. I do like her style, but oooh, the maintenance level would be a killer – all that exercising, spray tanning, trips to the hair dresser, headaches from the fumes at the nail bar. So much emphasis on the body in middle age is, IMHO, unseemly.

      • she has that stellium in libra so I guess she’s gone full immersion on the venusian angle and yes the fumes at the nail bar – do you have moon or neptune in scorpio? They seem to be prime contenders for sensitivity to fumes.

        • Didn’t know that about Neptune in Scorp whatevs. Neptune in Scorp is my chart ruler and I have extreme sensitivity to fumes (toxic sprays/strong perfume/spray deoderants/pollution, the list goes on).

          As for Laura, i think her story is a sad reflection on our dominant culture, up there with reality tv etc. I find her creepy in a plastic barbie pornstar kind of way.

          • LOL i don’t know if you get to put cheerleader and culture near each other without there being an oxymoron present – dominant cheerleader and porn sits well tho. Where does cheerleading come from? As in what are its origins? That’s probably a hypothetical question but it is a strange phenomenon – is it like the american version of a haka? i agree – it looks like she and barbie shopped their boobs from the same catalogue. not sure if the neptune or moon in scorp is an official thing or not but I noticed a trend and now always ask and inevitably the most fume sensitive people have it.

            • i take it all back wikipedia tells me cheerleading is a serious and dangerous business.

        • No, I don’t but every time I walk past a nail bar at a mall my head nearly explodes. I can’t imagine working in one or sitting there for how ever long it gets to have those hideous talons applied.

      • Pisces sun, Virgo moon: I clean and I write (and I weep just a bit for good measure).

      • Ooh, I write and meditate (or dwell on it). Moon in Scorp. (But Merc is chart ruler so..)

      • I SOMETIMES clean when I’m stressed/need to take my mind off things, but even that’s a rare occurrence… I’m a bit of a slob, actually. :) Only thing I have in Virgo is Mercury (and MC too). But even though I’m a slob I like to be incredibly organized when it comes to my writing journals. So much so that I’ll tear out whole pages and do them over again if I’ve so much as made one mistake. Yes I drive myself crazy.

        How I deal with trauma… Indifference and voraciously seeking new, unique and most times unconventional interests. Moon in Aqua.

  13. I like her style! Cheerleading not my thing but my Leo rising loves a good performance. She looks happy and real. Thanks Mystic, this post cheered me up no end… have spent too long moping over an ex, fighting urge to take to my bed with gin and give up on positive merc retro health revamp. I wonder who will play her in the film?

  14. I wonder who’ll play her in the movie?

    Virgos know success is the best revenge, and can pull it off AND Leo moon will throw in a few back flips and a teensy rah fuq u rah skirt. Cue Gloria Gaynor.

  15. Am I the only one who thinks this is tackarama? I don’t see how she has triumphed at all. Reeks of boganism to me. Oh well, I’ll take my sorry arse Virgo Moon for a walk . . carry on.

    • no you’re not the only one … I can smell the reek of monster truck fumes from here. 😉

  16. leo moon….made the cheerleading squad in high school….it is in the 12th house though so I quit before I even cheered at a single game. Way to shy for that.

  17. Living well is the best revenge.
    George Herbert
    English clergyman & metaphysical poet (1593 – 1633)

  18. Thanks Mystic – can SO relate to where she is coming from. Virgo Sun, Libra rising, Venus in Leo.

    Stella I don’t think it’s tackarama – if, as MM suggests (and I can relate to), she Virgoed out with house and kids and Libraed out with pleasing others -now she set her own goal – and has achieved it.

    I set myself very different goals, but lived by the Herbert quote, thanks MrCresote – living well is the best revenge. And decades later, I can look back and say these were good decisions.

  19. This role has Reese Witherspoon ALL over it. Or if it does not have enuf gravitas for her, i can see Cameron Diaz pulling this off beautifully.

    • Reese is an Aries/Cap Moon like me. She’ll do it for professional reasons only. Gravitas only at the *ahem*…Oscars…


      I don’t give a shite about that stuff…just razzin’ ya TLS x

  20. Good choice on Reese LS. So admire women that can do this. The x won’t be able to watch his fav team every friday night without her being in his face. ha!

  21. Rah Rah sis boom bah..

    Think your last paragraph may have said it all Mystic.

    Maybe her Virgo calculated the coup but Moon fueld it…

    Needs..nearly always about the needs…Filled or unfulfilled (unfulfilled the most dangerous but go girl…Double Leo Mum would have done no less given half the chance)

  22. It’s great for her to get out there and have some fun! Wish I was that fit.
    If I was her I would go for salsa dancing or tango though.

    Who would play her part? I see a chance for Ali Larter. She is Pisces though.
    I KNOW, Renee Zewellger she is Virgo Rising and Moon in Leo!!! Perfect, no??

      • I believe she can jump through hoops if she wants. That was not a character she played in ‘Chicago’ I think it is her inner self formalised in song and dance with story line.

  23. Snap. Get outta my head Mystic ! I was looking at this spontaneously not an hour ago. Quite spooked to see it appear on your site.

    This gives me hope that if I ever, ever really wanted to, I could put in the extra million miles and have a super fit body. But I don’t, at the mo’. Am having a breather from attaining uber hot body. Le puff, le pant…

    Remember three weeks ago I was complaining that nothing ever happened to me ?

    Its bloody all happening at once now. Would like three seconds together to scratch my arse and sit down. Not likely. Knitting keeping me sane, as ever. Have just knitted my first felted hat. Looks damn good. Must dash !

  24. Wow. I’m a 40 year old Virgo (massive virgo stellium) and although my moon and rising are both Sag, I do have Venus in Leo so not too dissimilar in astro genetics. I cannot imagine being a cheerleader myself but I do think that setting audacious goals competing against 20 year olds and coming out on top, also “coming out” about her age is just fantastic. Too many women are ashamed of their age and it saddens me how many lie about it.
    See the benefits of honesty and how a midlife crisis can really bring out the best in you if you have strength, determination, chutzpa and the courage of your convictions. I bet her husbands sex life pales in comparison to hers!
    In this case revenge is a dish best served HOT!