The Virgo Quilt

Filed in Astro-Decor

This quilt is designed by Scottish artist David Shrigley and you can buy it here – he is a Virgo, truly.

“Don’t make wild promises that you can’t keep,” is a totally Virgoan bit of advice.

In fact, Not-The-Typical-Virgo texted me those very words just the other day.

It was followed up quickly with a second text: “don’t roll yr eyes” and i actually was.

They’re psychic too.

Would you want this quilt? What would a Saggo-designed quilt say? What YOUR quilt say if you HAD to have a slogan on it?

72 thoughts on “The Virgo Quilt

  1. No I don’t want this quilt at ALL … however I was having an eerily similar conversation with the Toro Ex-fuqnut just last week … when Venus nearly went retro and the moon was dark (just to be precise)

    Exact words:

    “don’t make promises you can’t keep”
    “say what you mean and mean what you say and if you don’t know what that is just shut the fuq up”
    “a gift is NOT A LOAN” … whilst muttering under my breath “you retarded, stingy, lying, sack of shit”

    and the corker:

    “we are NOT FRIENDS so you can forget all about that fantasy”

    To everything purge, purge, purge … there is a season purge, purge, purge

    • “we are NOT FRIENDS so you can forget all about that fantasy”

      Weird. I’m a Toro and I had this same argument with my lit geek Virgo ex days ago as well.

      • maybe we’re (women) downloading a similar boundary setting program from the multiverse all at the same time?

        • Finally purged the “let’s be friends” Leo ex this week after six months of post-breakup torturedramapsychobats. It felt like getting out of jail.

          Saggo quilt: (from Spinal Tap) “Have a good time, all the time.”

  2. Virgoan texts are the best. Once after returning from a long trip, my lit/gramar geek Virgo sent, “I’ve missed you and your abuse of parantheses.” (Exactly like that, no “u” in place of “you.”)<–see, misusing the paranthese!

    If I had a quilt made, it'd probably say either "dreamer" because it's a friggin blanket and I have too much Pisces in my chart, or "abuser of parantheses"

  3. right now I think its fantastic… feeling in a say it like it is mood… and for the matter of all things in bed, need no delusions. But the aesthetics is what gets me off side… Maybe i would prefer it above my bed. Once did write a whole prose on long ago partners doona cover for them to come home to romance.

  4. My version of a Leo quilt would be either “Where’s the champagne?” and or “Why the fuq not?”.

  5. Ahh, mine might say, “Live Life Like You Mean It”.

    Can’t be doing wishy-washy, wet blanket or flimsy.

    Scorp Moon, Leo Sun.

  6. “Fuck?
    or Fuck off!”

    Pretty much sums it up for me. If you’re in my bed, you’re not there for sleeping.


  7. A Saggo quilt? It sure as shit wouldn’t say don’t make promises you can’t keep, that’s one thing I know fer sure.

    Definitely a good thing for Saggo’s to remember, given our prediliction for promising to do this or that out of spontaneous/benevolent/caring/optimistic impulses that we fully intend to live up to, when in fact our desire to be Father Xmas, Good Fairy, Philosophical Guru and Mother Theresa to all is totally impossible to live up to resource-and-time-wise, in this shitty o’l Saturn-ruled world.

    But definitely no fair to be confronted by a beguilting quilting when, pre-sleep, one is trying to chill/forgive oneself for forgetting/over-reaching one’s limitations, or when, pre-copulation, one is desperately trying to stay centred in one’s bod, rather than being distracted by what is in one’s head, or a strange desire to bolt.

    Lord, with a quilt like this, Saggo’s would feel so beguilted that they’d shrivel, conscience-all-a-question, blood flow all interrupted, and never get any at all, even with a regular partner whom they think that maybe one day they might possibly be willing to be corralled by.

    No, no, no, what every Sagg needs – if they HAVE to have a quilt with writing on it at all – is one that says: “Exit thy head, enter thy bod, and enjoy the now”.

  8. Beds are for fuqing in not passing on helpful quotations. The austere minimalist in me says “no slogans on anything”. The rococo extremist in me says a bed should still NOT have motivational anything. The furthest I’d go is a helpful sex book, not a manual (bit joyless) but Marquis de Sade or at a pinch Anaïs Nin.

    I have enough Sagg in me to make a guess that the Sagg slogan might be “do what thou wilt”. Or if you prefer “rules totally suck”.

    • Do what thou wilt. I like that, tati.

      From my experience, most Saggos deliberately (and if necessary, unobtrusively or secretly) break just about every rule imposed on them, without qualms, sure that universe will cheer them on in flouting trivial restrictions imposed by pettier minds. The the catch is that we have a cripplingly over-active conscience about the key things we DO believe to matter….and those things are so sacred that no human could ever function on this plane without fuqing up on at least one of them, occasionally. So yeah, if we’re all gonna fuq up sometimes anyway, then do what thou wilt is definitely the go.

  9. “Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by humankind”

    Rudyard Kipling..

    ( he had ‘mankind’. I just edited it.)

    And on the otherside..

    ‘Will rise for Earl Grey Tea’ or..

    ‘Everytime a woman gets out of bed for the day it’s a political act.’

    both embroided on a %100 organic cotton Hot pink or Peacock blue linen…

    • Most quilts or doonas get either flung to the edges of decorum or scrunched up anyway.. yet..

      I DO love reading in bed with or without a cup of tea or glass of wine and that last quote is a slight deviation from a very strong political activist I respect…

      Sometimes I NEED to read the reason to get out of bed because.. well, I’m just like that.

  10. Nooo!

    No-one tells me what to do, not even some pseudo-cutesy-personal-scribble quilt.

    It’s beguilting also (to use Mystic’s phrase). Beguilting shouldn’t be in the bedroom; not something that hits you just before you want to go to sleep. I find it a bit mad and mean.

  11. His work is hilarious, that quilt does not do his twisted sense of humor justice (unless it is by taking the piss out of art marketing by releasing a ‘motivational quilt’)
    One of my favorites of his was a photo of a sign he put up in a park, looking for a lost pigeon.

    • I LOVE SHRIGLEY! Love him, big fan. So not surprised he is a Virgo.
      Coincidentally, was at an art exhibition last night which included a piece that made me say “what angers me is not that this is such a blatant rip off of David Shrigley, but that it has no idea of the layers of sophistication required to copy David Shrigley”. My Virgo Art Snob moment for the day.

      In my office I have his gorgeous drawing of art critics looking at an enormous sculpture of the word CRAP and saying “it’s brilliant”

      • Lol

        Well i was doing Sculpture By The Sea once and all these arty establishment types were standing around gaping at the genius of this particular exhibit.

        It was a lunch box open with some syringes, a half eaten muesli bar and a porn magazine open next to it and it has yellow police tape all around it, right on the cliff.

        Anyway, i was looking at it too, listening to the arty peeps speculating as to who did it (because there was no plaque naming the artist) when two cops in blue overalls came up pissing themselves with laughter to remove the “exhibition.”

      • yeah but … why is that good? why is some scribbly, low rent, bit of drawing nonsense any better than the silly low rent bits of nonsense who make a career out of determining whether the word “crap” on a wall is worth more than the GDP of a third world country? Shrigley may be clever and I guess urbanely witty … but he’s vapid, soulless and his messages will be relevant for all of about 2.5 seconds because he’s got no connection to the universe (which is what art is meant to be about) and is only speaking to the banal, vernacular trivia of the idle classes of the current culture.


          • lol … I think I’ve just got a hangover from ye old art school days and all the lame brained (tho intensely serious) convos that went on constantly over “what is REAL art” and stuff … god it did my friggin head in …

        • Indeed I reckon my answer is in what u just said… What is real art now days..? At least make me laugh (and reflect on my own wankery) and u are half way there…sometimes…

  12. If you are not delivering the BEST cappachino and the BEST mushrooms on toast then leave NOW!

  13. If those sheets weren’t white… I would probably consider it.
    If he didn’t use the word ‘wild’, then I probably wouldn’t…
    … isn’t that odd.

    I knew a sagg once who wanted there bed to be a field. That was a retarded and ultimately disappointing shopping adventure.

  14. I think it’s fabulous. If I had this quilt when I was younger, I may have saved a lot of time I wasted on men who most certainly could not live up to their wild promises.

  15. Lol lol I love it….. would have a different quote for each week of the year.
    Mine would say….. Take a chance , you’ll never know if you don’t….
    or something like that

  16. for me it is not about the quilt WTF is that THING above the bed? the white thing? A HUGE dildo???? A light sabre? The quilt should read skywalker woz ere. Please don’t tell me it’s a flouro tube. Imagine. That in your bedroom.

  17. I’ve been carrying this around with me ever since it arrived in my head one fateful day, “Bring your gods, I’ll bring the wolves.”

    White bedding/walls always makes me want to turn into an arsonist. Never understood the appeal. But white is very Virgo so wise colour choice, David.

      • I do a lot of automatic writing, it came from that. A lot of channeling in general, really. I’m just walking around the home and all of a sudden I can feel this massive energy on its way to me and then it enters and it’s so not human because it’s so big and right when I feel like it’s going to tear me apart either a St. Teresa ecstatic type vision comes or I write. I remember Jung relaying a similar experience/feeling which absolutely made me think YES NOT INSANE.

        I had an Akashic records reading once from a friend, (Neptune is chart ruler in 10th house so a lot of psychic types just show up in my life) and there were certainly a lot of RAWR I WILL ENTER VALHALLA lifetimes. Independently fighting, and with NN in Aqua/12th house, now I have to learn to sacrifice that independence for a greater good.

        Though I will be studying Viking/Scandinavian cultures so I won’t be letting it go completely ;)

  18. The quilt in the picture would drive me crazy – those lines are just not straight enough – it’s probably my Virgo moon!

  19. I’m a Virgo and appalled by the mess on the floor at the foot of the bed! I’d rather that the mess be ON the bed. Piles are okay, but not on the floor. Plus the sweatshirts and books would cover the horrid, eye-crossing design.

    The slogan, I like!

  20. If it’s on the bed, I guess it could say something affirming about good love and sex, but written kind of sigil like so my kids aren’t wtf is on your bed mom?!

  21. Virgo part of me would pinch the t-shirt slogan of a brilliant friend of mine…
    “Warning: Contains Nudity”

    Capricorn part of me would have a design that divided the bed at around 2/3rds or 3/4rts saying “this is my half” on the bigger side.

  22. mine would say “good things happen here”. Relevant to all occasions methinks….

  23. my boyfriend just said, plain and clear ‘maximum 7 hours’
    sun, venus and mars in aries :-?

  24. As a Virgo (w Venus in Libra in 1st) – I must say that is a horrendously hideous quilt… though I do agree (entirely) with the quote.

    My quilt would say something along the lines of “Demolish fear; utilize your inherent goddess power & freedom” … just kidding. No I’m not

  25. Oh MY GOD! I am a virgo with a virgo sun and virgo mercury.. and that line epitomizes my thoughts. I got so angry when my brother broke his word, that my friend thought I was unreasonable. And I remember saying, ” I don’t like people saying things they do not do. I hate lies….”