Synastry: Justify Your Lust

Dan Walsh

Where does one go to get info on the more obscure aspects in Synastry?

I saw something about this in one of the comments recently and get a lot of questions regarding it as well.

Synastry is the art of chart comparison. You take your chart and that of the one you love or desire and see how your planets aspect one another.

The classic example is Venus and Mars. If your Venus is on his Mars or vice versa or even just trining it – voomp. The infamous ‘sexual napalm’. See John and Jessica – A Venus-Mars Case Study.

His Saturn on your Moon? Yick.  Sun-Mercury? Well, communication ain’t going to be a problem here.

But i think that if you are going looking for the more obscure aspects in synastry (“Dear Mystic, you think her Part of Fortune sequiquinquadrate my progressed Moon has any significance?”)  then, sorry, but you are being a bit despo. Or just indulgent.

Because in Synastry, it’s the major, close and steamingly obvious aspects that tend to tell the story of your relationship. Look for aspects such as a conjunction, opposition, square and trine with a two degree orb. List the top five such inter-links and voila – there is your compatibility.

Of course you can do more, you can whiz up composite charts (your chart and their chart blended into one) and then  you can progress that.

If you’re annoyed that their Saturn is on your Moon, you can bung in as many asteroids as you like. Who gives a fuq about that pesky Saturn-Moon situation when his asteroid Lucifer is on your Nefertiti?

Still, i think you just figure out the five most singular, glaringly obvious aspects and stick with those.

Whenever an astrologer or someone who knows about astrology, gets their mitts on the birth deets of a new  love/crush/lust interest, it is always an exciting moment and it’s so easy to overlook the cruddy bits. Plus it’s more fun to go goo-goo over the good bits.

So, in answer to the “obscure aspects” question, i.m.o. they’re basically irrelevant.

67 thoughts on “Synastry: Justify Your Lust

  1. Do you match the charts up by House or by sign?

    E.g. my wife is Sun in 12th House Taurus and I have Sun in 12th House Virgo. If matching by House we have conjunct suns (and many other planets) but if matching by signs we don’t.

    • I would call that an *affinity*, a similar aspect to your experience of life, but personally I have never considered calling that a conjunction.

      Planets in synastry show how people are like “transits” to your chart when you are in relationship with them. Someone else’s Sun in their 12th doesn’t speak to how they “ping” *you*, but if you know that Sun is conjunct your Taurus Moon for example, now you got a potent ping on your hands. :)

    • by sign! the house overlays have meaning too; which of your houses her venus falls in, etc.

    • if you go to astro.com in the charts section and use the pull-down menu you can put both your deets in and select the synastry chart herby – it calculates it for you so it takes the guesswork out of it and you are left to dig for gold without too much legwork : o)

      • Thank you – have now printed chart and am trying to work out how to read it. Have a cold / flu atmos so brain is fuzzled.

  2. Mystic, you are Spot On. Have so BTDT. Asteroids and such might describe some “flavors” to the relationship and such, but for the most part it’s the majors that rule. I do consider Chiron and conjunctions to Eros significant, tho.

  3. Thanks MM. Insightful and helpful as always – and in the interests of ironing out any of my possible amateur misreadings of two charts- is there any chance of your offering synastry as one of your Cosmic Consult choices? Not meaning of course, to sound ungrateful for your already vastly rich offerings.

        • She did have it as one of the consults, but after the revamp I don’t think it’s been back on offer. It was the deluxe one, around $250, for both synastry and composite. I too would like to see it back!

          Like saturnian said, not to be ungrateful for the ones already there/the ones back on offer, Mystic. Just to be clear. Don’t wanna be mistaken as coming across zap zone Libra Mars manip! :lol:

          • if I’m not mistaken MM, you did some freebies of this yonks ago?
            Like 2002?

            As well as partnerships I have also noticed strong themes in families: recurring signs through the personal planets.

            Presently I am neither lusting or loving. Let me just get the birth data on this rack of ice cubes, I think I feel some chemistry here.

  4. The astro connections of the lust (love?) of my life are:

    My: His:

    Sun conj Merc (and opp his Asc)
    Moon conj Sun/Eros/Jupiter
    Pluto conj Mars
    Neptune conj Uranus/Psyche (our respective chart rulers)
    Psyche conj ASC/Juno
    Eros conj Venus/Saturn
    DC conj Moon
    Venus sextile Venus/Saturn
    Mars sextile Mars

    Ok, that’s more than five but you get the picture. There’s more if you include asteroids and Part of Venus and Part of Mars too.

    And I am being Zapped by the ex-scorp whose delaying tactics in our property settlement are beyond the pale. Things were on track to be sorted within the next 2 weeks and I am planning to be in France in September. Now I get an email from lawyers saying he wants to put it off until end of September. NO. FUQING. WAY. Right now remembering to breathe – in and out – while waiting for my lawyer to call me back. And no, I haven’t reacted to the Scorps face, that will be just what he’s looking for and he’s not going to get it. Summoning Libran dignity and charm while waiting for opportunity pull the rug from under him.

      • OMG blue I glanced at your post as I scrolled and for a minute I thought it said something completely different! Something not so encouraging. Hilarious. Yeah good luck FF – september would mean mec retro is going on. God knows what kind of crazy blast from the past he might pull out of his arsenal to vex you in that phase.

    • Good luck ff!!! Wishing you to be in France by September!!!!! Woohoo, go fluidfeline! *standing with pompoms in hand for next cheerfest*

    • Thanks guys! Uberest of Virgo Lawyer (she has most of her chart in Virgo) is furious and moving mountains to get it over and done with asap. Distracting myself in the meantime and acting as if everything is going to be on schedule. And whatevs, his “arsenal” consists of the most passive aggressive behaviour i’ve ever encountered (he has Moon in Libra). FFS can’t we just move on already – it’s a new era and I wish he’d take Mystic’s advice. . And thankyou darling UPV – pompoms lol- i’ll keep you posted :-)

  5. Thankyou Mystic xx

    yeah I agree mini asteroid isn’t going to make or break it when bigger aspects at play, just things that are relevant (?), like axis points (asc,dsc,mc,IC) and NN are harder to find re google unless someone posted your exact question. I am not so great with angles so beyond conjunction in synastry its a bit more complex. I need to understand what it means more in terms of synastry and composite to figure it out i guess

    I hate asking love questions re astro as its a bit naff for a grown woman to be asking the stars for anything but awareness but some things are great with perspective.

    there are as many cool things as there are woah bits but the ones I was stuck on

    My MC conjunct his saturn (aries)
    My jupiter conjunct his Juno (virgo)
    His pluto on my IC (opposite MC) Libra
    His Asc on my Pluto
    His Venus on my Eros

    • MC – Saturn : did you meet him through work? Sounds to me like a really strong business partnership.
      The Pluto conjunctions are very interesting, apart from you just being a Scorp, I bet there’s a mega deep & meaningful and transformative (plus ‘we’ve known each other before’, with the Pluto-IC factor) vibe going on between you… ??

      • Yes very true Lex. funny thing is I didn’t meet him through work but he is offering to help out with some things re career.. I didn’t bother posting all the other bits but his mars is conjunct my asc too (gemini) so its very work money loaded SM core space. Felt very fated when we met but we never actualized it properly. now there is possible work around him (or eventually involving him) as well as the obvious wants to hook up factor. was curious about the pluto relations as he has a very strong effect on me but wasn’t sure if the aspects meant it was unhealthy

        • Urgh. Just re checked. thought it was weird he have Aries Saturn at 33!

          His MC is conjunct HIS saturn not mine- so scrap that

          His MC is conjunct my Juno exactly and saturn also (trining all my scorp cluster so saturn still huge) and all pluto stuff still stands

          • still not so sure about that Juno character, but I reckon the Pluto and Saturn trines are definitely endorse-able.

          • I agree unsure about Juno but its a major trine in my chart?

            the Pluto MC/IC thing and asc pluto is my main question, is that healthy?

  6. So here’s the trouble I always had, reading so much into the Synastry between me and the now TOTALLY NOT ANY LONGER love of my life.

    Born two weeks apart – EVERYTHING IS CONJUNCT!

    So the houses get super important I spose.
    He’s an Aqua Rising, sticking my Sun (along with his own) in his 12th, and our Venuses into his 1st, and our Marses in his 8th… Is this painting a picture for you? – yes, it was always Wuthering Fuqing Heights.

    My Virgo Rising puts his Sun in my 4th, our Venuses in my 7th, and our Marses in my 1st… I was always much more serious about this so-called Soul-Mating than he ever was, Aqua Rising or not…

    • omg, I had always wondered what the conjunctions would be like for someone born so close to your own Bday same year! were you heathcliff or kathy btw? hehe

      the evil scorpio I dated all those years ago had my same sun moon merc venus and it was waay to loaded. can’t imagine having all that conjunct

    • Oh but I missed the most important thing. Even being born so close there is one thing that will likely differ… THE MOON.
      But of course, we were born 14 days apart, so our moons are indeed almost exactly in opposition (and both mutable signs too – no wonder it was such a saga of dilly-dallying…)

      Ms – I think, in daylight, I would have to confess to having been the Kathy in the scenario, but in the bedroom on the other hand… ;-0

  7. mars conjunct Venus shazam with the lusty! but he being mostly cancer and me being mostly Leo means lots of emo stuff to deal with.
    satun conj moon – icko- we overanalyse and are too serious
    merc trine saturn – all good

    • Omg…that Venus-on-Mars chemistry is the best! Have had his Mars on my Venus (same signs and my fave) and his Venus on my Mars (adjacent signs and still totally delish).

      Yah…I want summa dat. :)

      His Sun on my Eros is fab as well!!

  8. venus opposition venus 1.2 deg
    my pluto trine his mars 0.01 deg
    most my planets trigger his eros at less then 2 deg
    his venus square my jupiter
    my venus sextile his jupiter
    sun opposition sun

    I’m slightly obsessed with this dude, he is also my best friend. FUQ

    I don’t think it is a good idea to take things further, as right now the friendship feels like its too good to be true. Plus we’re starting a creative project in a few weeks time.

    • oh there’s big Northnode connection bothways, including venus northnode opposition.

    • Oh no, the fated-friend obsession. Urgh, I know that one too well and judging by my poor success rate, I will offer no advice – but good luck with it! There’s some serious Synastry going on there – love a Sun-Sun opposition, but do wonder whether one should befriend the opposition and bed the trine…?

      • You’re so righ Lex, “befriend the opposition and bed the trine” so nicely put. Yes too many oppositions, good for spa buddy, but to take it further might not be such a good idea. The project might work well.

    • Wot creative project? Building a bed? Fix your Feng, be scented and amazing as you create, wait until Venus gets into Scorpio for months on end and voila

      • bwahahahahha NO not a bed! we’re masterplanning togethr. Getting onto feng shui pronto thanks MM xx

  9. Actually, should we write a little adage / golden rule to always keep in mind? Something like…

    ban a sqaure
    befriend an opposition
    bed a Trine
    and cheat with a sextile

    Mystic?? Little help?

    • ohhh….. opposition (friend) and sextile (cheat)…. sounds like an FB haha nooooooooo

    • I get best results bedding the squares, befriending the conjunctions…QUINCUNX – now you are talking. Actually, no.

      I do think there should be some sort of a warning out on the South-Node connections. They feel sooooo instantly hot and addictive, meant-to-be, familiar yet thrilling and yet it’s an old-old-old story, maybe not meant to be re-told in this lifetime.

  10. LOVE the pic you used for this entry, Mystic. Soothing, mesmerizing and at the same time they remind me of cinnamon buns.

  11. Every time I try to look into the synastry with my boyfriend I get confused and give up. ;p
    Our ascs/dcs are almost exactly the same, if I have his birth time right, which I think I do.
    His sun trines or sextils (dunno which) my mecury and neptune. My sun trine/sextils his mercury and uranus. But, my mars opposes/squares (again I’m not sure how to tell which) his venus. My venus only opposes/squares his uranus. His mars trine/sextils my mercury. I think my moon opposes/squares his moon and jupiter. But his moon is trine/sextil my pluto. I’m a sun leo, moon sagg, rising sagg. He’s a sun taurus, pisces moon, rising sagg ( i think rising sagg). But we get along really well. So, I dunno.

  12. Pon-Pon
    Great communication.
    Great sex.,
    Erratic emotional intimacy with sudden reversals/cold fronts
    more great communication
    maybe don’t do shared $ with him
    you bring up his old mother or female authority issues but not in a bad way
    he is more grounded than you, sensual. He grounds you. You build his confidence.

  13. which ones to focus on?!!

    moon opp venus
    moon conj neptune
    sun conj saturn
    sun conj merc
    merc conj saturn
    sun trine jupiter
    venus sq jupiter etc etc etc

  14. Ok, according to synastry, I should be with my first ex husband whom I have never stopped loving and who has recently contacted me after so long..

    Our Junos are 10 Virgo and 12 Virgo….

    His Sun and Venus are 25 Gemini. My Mars is 24 Gemini.
    His Mars is 17 Leo. Exactly opposite my Venus at 16 Aquarius;
    and trine my Moon at 19 Aries.
    His Moon and my Mercury at 21 Aquarius.
    His Jupiter and my Anteros (answer to love’s longing) ay 19 Taurus.
    His True Node at 11 Scorpio, mine at 13 Scorpio.

    Need I go on??? Yes it looks like he will have to divorce his second wife after all……. (this is my fantasy, boo hoo)

  15. Ohh Mystic. What the hell does 5 planets in the twelfth house mean in a progressed composite? NOBODY ever seems to want to say. Those lucky planets are the Sun, Moon, Mercury, Pluto, Venus and fuqing Vesta just cause the party wasn’t big enough! Should I buy 3 or 4 bottles of absinthe?

  16. What I’ve always wondered about synastry (and maybe you could enlighten me, Mystic) is does it only work when comparing two natal charts or does it also apply when comparing planets by sign and degree without charts? For example, your venus is in the same sign and at the same degree as his mars.

  17. Top 5 Most Obvious to Gem Hub would be:

    (My – His)

    1) Asc conjunct his Sun
    2) Moon conjunct his MC
    3) Moon, Mercury trine Mars
    4) Jupiter conjunct Mars
    5) Neptune conjunct Neptune

    These are probably not the most important ones, but are what I can work out.

  18. My new BFF who I think is a soulmate friend, has her moon conjunct my saturn. I sighed when I saw it as I think it could spell trouble in the longrun.

    But we have such a loving friendship and teach and support each other in many things, so I think it is manifesting in that way.

    Either way it has me confused about the saturn-moon thing as it doesn’t feel cold or bad, just grown-up, healthy, supportive and highly loving.

    • Well, I bet her Moon (nurturing) is being very supportive & loving to ur Saturn (responsibility)… I am sure you love her too… just make sure u r not acting too mature (Saturn) towards her, when all she wants is a warm hug; allow her to cry, even if it’s childish. Also, try to not make her wait (Saturn) too long when she needs (Moon) you; it can really make her feel lonely and emotionally unsupported (even though she may very well need to learn how to be emotionally self-sufficient).

      Basically, whenever she gets too emotional/attached/needy/dependent, you may feel like u need to be more stoic, mature, withdrawn, responsible, realistic, teach her how to handle her emotions, etc. All good intentions, coming from love for sure… it’s just that at the moment such reaction from you may feel very painful to her…

  19. I always find the NN and Vertex aspects are what take it a level up for me, in terms of love not lust. I have some far out stuff going on with the love of my life (jerk) but evidently some far out stuff keeping us apart too.

    Find that Venus/Mars conjunction crops up a lot in my own life, friends charts, famous couples. It’s a classic but all times I’ve had it, it’s = bad sex. Weird. A nice Mercury trine is my favorite in all relationships, like a band aid, makes even hard aspects easier to deal with.

    Currently got the hots for someone I have totally rats synastry with, once again. Must be part of some cruel plan that I’m not aware of to keep me single for the rest of my life.

    • More like just lessons…you know how sometimes we keep getting bumped with the same stuff over and over until we finally go A-HA!!!!..and then don’t do it anymore (go for same sort of guy/react to situations the same way etc.) One psychic lady I spoke to years ago called it “karmic lift-off”, which I think is kinda cute. Once you finally learn from it and choose not to go that same path again, you get out of the recurring spiral and can move on, up up and away!!

    • don’t think I have ever had a venus mars conjunction.
      pluto always about causing trouble but not mars. anyone know a hot non mountain climbing mars sagg 19 degree send them over :)

  20. I call it the ‘karmic hamster wheel’ and I’m stuck on mine with industrial glue. But I’m hoping that once Saturn has been, conjuncted and gone off again (one month) that lift off will happen. It’s not like I’m not paying attention or having the a-ha’s, the lessons just keep coming in disguise. V annoying.

    • I find you do get better at recognizing them once you realise that’s what happens -but often it’s once you’re in too deep- and by then it’s liked a mixed aha/ ohhh noooo!!!

      • Meant like not liked obviously! And I love the karmic hamster wheel analogy!- though yes does make me think would be stuck forever, at least with the spiral you can eventually get the f up and out! So only a month to go- not long at all- good luck!

        • Mars sq my Venus seems to be my karmic hamster wheel.
          Maybe a nice solid Capricorn Mars is what I need to firmly pull me off it.

  21. My Pluto square his Moon
    My Uranus squares his Mars (yes he’s an Aries & 7 years younger than me)
    My Mars opposite his Saturn which T-square my MC conjunct his Mercury
    My Saturn trines his Neptune
    My Moon sextile my MC conjunct his Mercury
    My Jupiter sextile his Saturn
    My Sun conjunct his Uranus
    All within 4 degrees

  22. This cap fellow and I have:
    Trine sun mercury
    Trine sun venus
    Sextile venus uranus
    Trine venus jupiter
    Sextile venus neptune
    Trine mars pluto
    Sextile mars neptune
    All within three degrees.
    I don’t quite know what that means for us, but I do know the sex was fantastic.
    /shrug

  23. would someone be so kind and tell me something .
    if i look at only closest orb i got followin aspects :
    my venus trine his venus
    my venus opposition his mars
    exact my mars opposition his jupiter
    my jupiter sextile his venus
    my uranus sextile his venus
    pluto conjuction pluto
    my north node trine his pluto
    chiron conjuction chiron

    What to dO???

  24. can anyone tell me why his Saturn on my Moon is bad? is it supposed to contain/restrict my emotional experience or something?