Saturn Can Be Fun

Coverline wise, i think this may just be the ultimate Cosmo cover, EVAH in the history of the world.

I also love Heidi. Her astro is interesting - she is a Multiple Conjunct Gemini…Multi-tasker for sure…Sun, Moon, Saturn, Venus and Mercury all tight together in Gemini – trined by Uranus – the rad innovator – and squared by Mars, for totally NEVER resting on your laurels for even a nano-sek.

I think she’s got Virgo Rising, thus putting all her Gemini in the Career Sector/Midheaven and making for the unreal multi-tasking skills, fitness, motherhood, marriage to Seal, making the model to mogul trip seem like just one big fun crazy trip to the mall sort of thing.

And Saturn has been squaring all her Gemini stuff, sitting on Pluto, opposing her Mars and is now about to trawl over the Uranus…Heidi is everywhere all of a sudden. See, Saturn can be fun. If you can handle non-stop slog and the special, patented Saturn-Vision, it gives you leverage and currency.

57 thoughts on “Saturn Can Be Fun

  1. well she’s certainly wearing a very nice, er, dress (bandage?)….

    hey Mystic – you think the Saturn-Uranus thing could have caused the earthquake here in Adelaide last night?

    was only thinking the other day that we hadn’t had an earth tremour here for years – had several of them through the seventies and eighties from my very vivid memories of them…

    last earthquake I was in was Tokyo in 1989, which was pretty awe inspiring from the 34th floor of a hotel. Tokyo is built for them so its not so much a quake as a mild ‘sway’ every so often…

  2. *banging door* *engine turns over* am off to find that issue of Cosmo … if it hasn’t spontaneously combusted ….. ;)

    • oh please do shed some light then Jumpin In on exactly what an orgasm trick is. Balancing balls? Jumping through hoops? Being cut in half and then magically becoming whole again?

  3. Cosmopolitan must be the trashiest rag sold on newsstands today. It does absolutely nothing to empower women, in any way.

    • I so agree, have been so against Cosmo & Cleo since beginning of 90′s.
      When they did an article on prostate stimulation for men, no mention
      of condoms, it was sexual abuse of men, the way it was written & physically
      hurt a few botfriends in the process.

  4. Heidi’s born two days before my husband!

    They are both Multiple Gem’s (he’s Cancer Moon and Aqua Ascendent tho) and Water Ox’s, I really think that combo is awesome! My husband, like Heidi seems to be, is steady, loyal, cool, hard-working and yet very, very light… Like all the best qualities of a Taurean without the stodge?

    And NOW I learn the poor dude has had Saturn squatting on his Pluto with it’s pants down, squaring off his extreme Gemininess and opposing his mars…

    And it’s true..! He has been working his butt off with us having two babies under two, working hard & smart to maintain his job, doing all the shopping, loads of cooking, ironing his own shirts and putting up with my occasional hormone driven tantis then sucking it all up and going off to iron his own shirts and sleep in another room as I am sleeping with bub (temporarily).

    He’s also made a couple sets of audio equipment and given them away as gifts, plus a dinner table in the last couple of months. You know. Just for fun. Got to say this Saturnian version of fun suits him, I would be a puddle of tears on the floor by now if I were him.

    We looove Project Runway with Heidi, so inspiring and educational. I would love to be able to sew and meet challenges like they set there! Design a dress for Lilo! Make an outfit from this supermarket trolley full of cabbage and tinsel! Try to elicit a facial movement out of lovely Michael Kors!!

  5. This is truly a classic Cosmo cover and sets the bar to a whole new low. “Heidi Klum: How she got every damn (sic) thing she wanted”…Er, she’s white, blonde, thin and rumoured to have half a brain?

    All that’s missing from those bylines is “Climb that Corporate Ladder: Vajazzle Your Way to the Top” and “Do it Yourself Objectification”

    Somewhere in NYC, Naomi Wolf is weeping into her chamomile tea.

    • UV, totally unrelated question, but I was wondering what/if you think you can draw links between astro and chinese medicine? Like if someone has strong Mars or Saturn placements, may they have a tendency toward excess yang energy (or yin deficiencies), and if you could then say something like as well as eating lots of cucumber man, if one were to work their moon/venus it might balance some of the yang?

      • No, it’d be difficult to try to combine the two. In very simple elemental terms, yes, as in people with a lot of fire and air in their chart are more likely to be yang/overheated, but when it comes down to planets etc, the correspondences are too vague. Both astro and TCM are very specific, self contained systems.

    • I’ve heard her called “Heidi Dumb”…. not sure if that is just people being b*tchy though. I think she and Seal have a nice family.

      • I don’t get the Heidi thing at all.
        Why is she famous again?
        And why does anyone care?
        She just seems like (and is) a blonde model married to a 90′s popstar. Yet the story is everywhere. They are touted as an uber-couple simply because they turn up to zillions of events. Huh?

    • *snort* I hear ya Uber… from the looks of things Feminism is Dead… you only have to walk down any busy city street here in Adelaide to witness a sea of Barbies; fake-tanned, peroxided, cinched-in, primped and Ready for Action in their stripper shoes. Scary.

      • Oh is that where they all moved from LA??? Because we clone ‘em here en masse. They look like androids at the gym.

  6. It’s weird….I feel like I should like Heidi, I’m also a Gem with Virgo moon….but she just kinda……bugs. And no, it’s not cuz she has it all. Come off a bit tactless, I guess that’s what I dislike.

  7. And next week meet the lady who had 7 orgasms while having a Brazilian , umm, soccer team.

    • If that were me i’d keep it real quiet but thanks for the inspiration!

  8. completely unrelated but i just had to post these amazing photos of the volcano in Iceland. The last one is stunningly beautiful. Wonder what star sign Iceland is?

    • Iceland is a remarkable place – those pics are very beautiful! Apparently Iceland, like Heidi, is a Gemini.

    • Thanks for those robots. I like the ones by orvaratli the best, esp ‘lava river’ and ‘a rock is born’.

  9. Wow who knew Saturn could be so much fun!

    I saw an interview with Heidi once & she said that her & Seal renew their vows every year(?!?!) by having a great big party…. I thought yeah that is pretty cool & sounds like so much fun! I thought then she had to be a Gemini, that would be the only reason to have so many weddings (lets face it… YAWN!)…. it’s the party!

    I have Sun, Venus & Moon in Gemini all trining pluto & all sq Saturn

  10. I learned the hard way not to trust cosmo sex tips – a man screaming ‘what the fuck – get offa me’ as he leapt out of bed.

    But i do like looking at those coverlines and i would rather have cosmo orgasms and abs stuff no matter how shallow than Taliban

    Heidi…i never liked her but i read interview in which she was just so cool that now i get her. i think she would be a woman’s woman. She is also v.honest about how hard she has worked to make the most of what she has got.

    Can someone please tell me what HIS burning Sex need is..And which He??? My gardener? Ex-husband? Trainer? Sometimes it is hard to tell which “HIM” Cosmo is referring to.

    Poor Iceland. First they go broke and then a volcano.

  11. HA! These headlines are absurd…

    Flat abs, tight butt in 4 moves?
    1. Snort coke
    2. Starve
    3. Get implants
    4. If all else fails liposuction works a treat

    Give yourself a Brazilian without tears?
    Stick needle into your orbital socket. Swoosh around a bit to make sure frontal lobes completely decimated (don’t worry .. you don’t really need them). Now apply the wax .. yes I know a bit unco but promise, you won’t feel a thing!

    The Seven Best Orgasm Tricks in the World??
    I thought there were only three really useful ones …
    1. Mastrubation … an oldie but a goodie
    2. Vibrators
    3. Become a lesbian

      • Flat abs, tight butt in 4 moves.

        Go to clinic
        Lie down on a bench
        Injected with botox accordingly

        thats 3

          • prowin and I had a virtual trans continental overnight shebang, just don’t tell any one.

          • david .. sweetie darling

            when are you going to work out that I’m not “prowin” as in something one does with a ship? … best not to go there prolly


            “prowln” … as in prowling about, mewing and smooching and shedding fur et al


          • typical male. have an overnight shebang and he can’t even get your name right.. haha.. or mayhaps too many instances of hitting the headboard? hee heee

        • I hope this misunderstanding re: minor details like your name, doesn’t effect our next 24hr ‘work related’ closed door meeting ? ( Also, just privately, I had the medical and its all OK, yes, I can use the 80mg next time.

      • FFS, this is the 3rd time i’ve tried to post right here and each time it’s been swallowed!! ) (Merc x) Davidl I had a witty smart reply all done x 3, but gone baby gone. Do u think i’m losing it – well, yes probably (not thinkable with Virgo Merc!!!). Anyway i remember wanted to say hope you are having fun with Venus in Toro ;-)

        There was more but that was for u darling prowlincat!!

  12. My Cappy daughter was walking past as I scrolled. She stopped, pointed at the pc and said, ‘What has she done to that poor zebra!’

  13. yeah, that’s weird b/c i’m a gem/cap moon and i knew heidi was a fellow gem, as well as always wondered why she seemed so lifted/blithe/breezing-above-it-all despite what would be for most an extremely stressful social life, etc. it all made sense when i found out her moon about a month or so ago. with my cap moon the past is like totally now-poignant and unshakable until fully dealt with and moved-on-with. with gem sun-gem moon moving on is not a question; it is the way. it’s just how they are… in no way filing that away under good or bad…. ignorant or pathological. sometimes it just is. in ways, i envy the gem sun/gem moon combo; most though, i appreciate my cap moon and know that i will appreciate it more with “age.” on an off-note, in terms of harmonic charts, i’ve been perusing many, including my own, harmonic charts, the NINTH to be more specific. from basal, perhaps superficial research that appeals to me, i’ve learned that the ninth harmonic chart is like the soul x-ray of a person, i.e. what can’t be automatically gleaned from the natal. i love it, etc.

    • interesting your take on Cap moon, cause in some ways (i also cap moon) I MUST process, reprocess, emotionally work through, discuss, analyse, file and eventually shred / discard and make a not on the records – for The Past. (phew)
      other times / what causes conflict for me is that I just want to forget about it all and Move On, but I now know that I really have t work thru whatever until I have clarified exactly what TF happened.
      As I get older I am getting better at dealing with life events, before they become The Past

  14. well i never buy these mags and generally dont succumb to advertising ie not the least bit tempted to eat more than my dinner when watching tv and seeing a barrage of food ads. but i wanted to buy that mag . i went into the news agency and it wasnt there tg and i wanted to stop in at the servo and buy some deep fried crap. wtf. i didnt buy the deep fried food. but what happened to me!!!!!! sooo glad i got home ok. gonna bury myself in housework and hope it never happens again.