Jesus Was A Capricorn

album-jesus-was-a-capricorn

Jesus was a Capricorn, he ate organic foods.
He believed in love and peace and never wore no shoes.
Long hair, beard and sandals and a funky bunch of friends.
Reckon they’d just nail him up if He come down again.

‘Cos everybody’s got to have somebody to look down on.
Who they can feel better than at anytime they please.
Someone doin’ somethin’ dirty, decent folks can frown on.
If you can’t find nobody else, then help yourself to me.

Kris Kristofferson

See Also: Jesus…An ARIES?!

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  1. libra tiger’s avatar

    love it!! i thought he was a pisces

    Reply

  2. Lemonlovinlibran’s avatar

    I actually have the original LP……

    Reply

  3. Ram Tormented by Librans’s avatar

    I am sure I ready one of Mystic’s posts just this year that said that some people believe Jesus’ birthdate was April 6 – making him an Aries. I almost fell over because that is my birthdate.

    Reply

  4. Damons22/jan’s avatar

    i thought he was born on xmas day 25 Dec making him a cap? then he did die and was born again kinda on easter making him a Pisces ? why dont we just find the middle way here and call him an Aqua! …. Yeah Jesus is an Aquarian… cool

    Reply

  5. Damons22/jan’s avatar

    Oh i blew it … easter is in April right? making him an Aries … silly me.

    Reply

  6. Ms.’s avatar

    I know this is an album reference but re the jesus birthday thing- I am not buying it. Just magically happens to fall on the same annual span as yule and every other sun god myth AND easter equinox rebirth? little bit too convenient when trying to start conversion of pagan worshipers. Also, with all the other editing and dismissals, revised editions, coverups and dead sea scrolls that still live in a vatican safe does anyone believe anything the church says anymore anyway?

    Sorry I don’t mean to get all preachy, I have nothing against jesus but it just screams bollucks to me. as does a Rabbi with no wife back then? did they know any Jews? or Capricorns for that matter?

    Reply

  7. Ms.’s avatar

    ram tormented by librians! what a great handle !!!

    Reply

  8. starstrokes’s avatar

    If you get into the idea of Jesus being one of the prophets of the teachings of the age of Pisces- (compassion, mysticism, sacrifice etc ), it makes sense that he be a Piscean, which he evidently is. Very interesting…there are books devoted to the analysis of his horoscope- go there!

    Reply

    1. starstrokes’s avatar

      Did Kris Kristofferson have a messiah complex?!

      Reply

      1. Sweetpea’s avatar

        God question and I even looked up his birthdate this morning wondering if he is Cap. But no, looks like he’s a Gemini.

        Reply

  9. jo’s avatar

    Just a very cool dude (Kris or Jesus take your pick)……………

    Reply

  10. Lexicorn’s avatar

    aaah Mystic. That too has eased the hangover and award-robbery… xx

    Reply

    1. Über Virgo’s avatar

      You were robbed???!!!!

      Poor Lex. You’ll knock em dead next time.

      Reply

      1. Lexicorn’s avatar

        It was a seriously hot Virgo Rising/Moon outfit too!! Black and white but broken down, organiced up and diagonal lines. Oh well… xx

        Reply

        1. fallen angel’s avatar

          Lexi Babe, winning is being fabulous and by the sounds of it, you hit it by a landslide!

          Reply

          1. Lexicorn’s avatar

            Aw shucks.

  11. Über Virgo’s avatar

    I posted somewhere on the site earlier this year, according to BBC doco “Son of God”, Jesus was a multiple conjunct Aries. The historians checked with astronomers for the star the Magi followed, which turned out to be Jupiter burning very bright and close to the moon. I think it was Sun, Moon, Jupiter and Saturn in Aries on that date.

    Reply

    1. Über Virgo’s avatar

      Found it. Around April 17, 6 BC. A new moon eclipse, plus Jupiter as morning star.

      Reply

  12. Ms.’s avatar

    cool thanks uber virgo, I will pass that onto my father he is totally into jesus coverups.

    Reply

  13. Tones’s avatar

    I read somewhere he was born around late april/early may- which made sense to me cos other revolutionaries Lenin, Stalin, Castro all had the earth/fire cusp thing as well.

    Reply

  14. fallen angel’s avatar

    Soz, said it before, will say it again, Jesus a Pisces. I think they declared him born on Dec. 25th for Tax Purposes.

    But seriously, the sandals, laid back demeanor, the nebulous relationships with tainted women who he compassioned back to wholeness and innocence, the fishes, the wine, the organic hippy look…???? Going walkabout for 40 days & nights, what about this is not a Piscean experience?

    And not quite ON topic but isn’t it funny that if we lobbed off the lower half of his tunic and gave him tight pants and shades, he’d essentially look like a rock star? I’ve always wondered if there was a relation between that and the rock look of utter cool mayhem.

    Reply

    1. unpredictable pisces’s avatar

      yes to all of that. agree…. esp tight leather pants. jesus would understand, he’s cool like that. :)

      Reply

  15. Sweetpea’s avatar

    Excerpt in “From Bethlehem to Calvary” A.A. Bailey on the five initiations of Christ..

    There have been, it is said, one hundred and thirty-six different dates fixed on by different Christian sects.”

    “The matter was finally settled by Pope Julius in 337 AD, and St. Chrysostom, writing in 390, says, “On this day (i.e. 25th December) also the birth of Christ was lately fixed at Rome, in order that while the heathen were busy with their ceremonies (the Brumalia, in honour of Bacchus) the Christians might perform their rites undisturbed”.

    Yet, the book goes on to state that “The choice of this particular date is cosmic in it’s implications, and not unwittingly, we can be sure, did the wise men of earlier times make these momentous decisions. Annie Besant tells us that:

    “He (a Solar God) is always born at the winter solstice, after the shortest day of the year, at the midnight of the 24th December when the sign Virgo is rising above the horizon; born as this Sign is rising, he is born always of a Virgin, and she remains a Virgin unchanged and unsullied when the Sun comes forth from her in the Heavens”.

    Century (author) says that “the ancient people of the Anglian nation, by which he means the pagan English before their settlement in Britian about AD 500, began the year on December 25th, when we now celebrate the birthday of our Lord”; and he tells us that the night of December 24th-25th “which is the very night now so holy to us was called in their tongue “Modranecht”, that is to say “Mother’s Night”, by reason of ceremonies which that night long vigil they performed”.

    At the time when the English were converted to Christianity in the Sixth and Seventh Centuries the festival of he Nativity on December 25th had been already long established in Rome as a solem celebration.

    At the time of the birth of Christ, Sirius, the Star in the East was on the meridian line, Orion called “The Three Kings” (stars in Orion’s belt) was in proximity; therefore the constellation Virgo, the Virgin, was rising in the East , and the line of the ecliptic, of the equator and of the horizon all met in that constellation.

    This constellation is also composed of three stars in the shape of a cup. Ths is the true Holy Grail , that which contains the life blood, the repository of the sacred and the holy, and that which conceals divinity. These are astronomical facts”.

    I personally have no idea of whence Christ was born. Like Ubs states, historians now say an Aries but the Virgin birth info. is thought provoking and makes sense to the Virgin birth stuff we learn when young.

    Reply

  16. Aqua Baby’s avatar

    Didn’t some medieval monks stuff up the Georgian calendar? Would that have affected the estimation of April 6? I’m not overly religious but I just cannot believe Jesus was an Aries…unless he bossed his followers into portraying him as selfless, humanitarian, all-wise, etc etc…

    Reply

    1. fallen angel’s avatar

      Yes, can you imagine him going, My Way or the High Way?

      I think it was actually “I am the Way, the Truth and The Light” which if he said that with a cocktail on one hand next to a pool would be so Piscean IMO.

      Reply

    2. davidl’s avatar

      look here AB, none of that silly typecasting now… jesus had many traits shared with the aries stereotype. Courage, strength, ability to persevere, honesty…should I go on ? Oh, and he was amazing in bed..

      Reply

      1. scorpalicious robot’s avatar

        oh Jesus Christ!!! :)

        Reply

        1. fallen angel’s avatar

          Scorpalicious, in a moment of passion I once called to the Deity, at the time was dating the Comedy Sagg who promptly corrected me and said, no Babe, is not God, is X.

          Funny bastard.

          Reply

          1. scorpalicious robot’s avatar

            Tee hee.. :)

      2. fallen angel’s avatar

        hmm. the sexual prowess would completely explain all the groupies in uniform (nuns) then ya?

        Reply

  17. Lexicorn’s avatar

    OK. Weighing in. Why not. I should defend my kind I s’pose.
    I’m all up for Jesus, the man, being any sign he liked, and Aries sounds about as apt as any other, actually quite fitting, and I’m very impressed with Uber’s citations. But all-we-peeps-here know that the Jesus we have created in pop-culture is just the latest retro recreation of the sun god, of the solstice, of the return of fire from the frost, which would make Apollo, Ra, Sol, Jebus et al, a personification of Capricorn… King of the Deities darlings.
    ;-)

    Reply