Astro-Weird: What SIGN IS THIS GUY?
W.T.F. yourself.
Please bear with me on this.
The Scorpio Sex Academic sent me the link to this guys Personal Ad online. Okay, it’s a whole site. And it is TOTALLY worth a read. Trust me on this. Right through to the end because it gets better. I am not gonna do an Astro-Poll because peeps will just randomly click on impulse without reading his totally cuckoo yet genius personal ad. I am thinking he is a Leo and – as my head is still sore! – am going to simply relax & look forward to you guys commenting in the, um, comments stream. The World’s Most Grandiose Personal Ad In Online Dating History is here….
Note; he provides NO details re his birthsign…You’d think someone SO cosmic would deem it of fuqing vital importance. I mean, if he wants his next missus to have both a trim waistline, the ability to help him manifest his global vision, comfortable with earning trillions of dollars, adept at yoga and uncluttered – that chick would WANT to know his birthchart. Obviously.
LIBRA! maybe this a bit of the water carrier too.
No one can day dream about ethereal love to that extent, other than a libra.
Oh well, good luck to him. Can we keep tabs on his progress????
I couldn’t read the whole thing. I tried. But it was just too horrific. And hilarious. He’s really a comedian, isn’t he?
Hmmm, wow he is really putting it out there!! Mmm i would suggest leo moon, with maybe pisces sun…..that long list had me thinking of virgo maybe venus or mars?? not asking for much, ay?
I would have to say Leo because the constant pictures of himself with mercury in Sagittarius.
Just a guess
am.stunned.
that is one of the funniest (and disturbing) things ive ever seen.
“i am a GLOBAL VISIONARY….i am EXTREMELY BRILLIANT…”
i HATE the say this, but could he be a really low Sagg, masquerading as a truly cosmic high Sagg??? because i HAVE met Sagg men who believe themselves to be the spiritual/sexual incarnation of god- its the divine spark gone hideously wrong!
love the way he balances all the truly cringeworthy goddess talk with ‘MUST HAVE A TRIM WAIST, NO EXCEPTIONS’. how high minded of him, LOL!!
honestly when men go on and on about needing to find a goddess- and have such stringent criterea about the image of perfection that must manifest before them i worry about their issues with women. dude, have you looked in a MIRROR?? the flowery collared t-shirt matched with panama hat does not inspire the Super-Sexual (when shes not meditating all day) love goddess.
so yeah my vote is Sagg, which makes me ashamed to be one, but all that cosmic conciousness wrapped up in a ‘i hear directly from GOD’ BUT i need an athletic physique makes me think LOW LOW Sagg.
ie- makes me think that HE thinks he is some kind of love guru aka cult leader in the making.
sorry, i have to show this to everyone. absolute gold.
saggigal – I’m laughing so much I’m crying. “dude, have you looked in a MIRROR
Son got up to see what was wrong and I showed him the picture of this dude. Now he’s cracking up too.
Hilarious. I particularly love the pic right after the sexuality rant
DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR TO THE MAX.
I have no idea what sign he is – but thanks for the laugh Mystic.
And his eyes don’t look very healthy if he’s such a pure peep.
yeah, what’s with the pink eyeshadow under his eyes!! Or is it badly photoshopped to remove the dark circles?
The August 2004 pic ….. EEEEEEEEUUUUUUUWW. That shirt he’s wearing is truly VILE!!
yep that’s the smiling axe murderer pic – the blood red shirt an all.
it is one of the single most sexually unappealing things i have ever seen.
and yes- so MANY photos!
God almighty! I just got here and what a spin out!
I think saggigal is right onto it! Lower sagg, but with a shitload of windbag lower air all over his chart.
I had to speed read through it in case it cloyed my qi, but first reactions were:
a) this is a wannabe guru, unsuccessful on the whole but trawling the net for followers – dumb, lonely, female followers to be specific.
b) the putz isn’t interested in finding a mate at all. The whole thing is self promotion – a rambling ode to his favourite person.
c) out and out whackjob in the style of most cyber whackjobs and their incoherent manifestos
Interesting too, the chaotic style in which he writes is designed to have a hypnotic quality. It’s a really common technique among wannabe gurus to use insightful sounding language, eg, invoke the name of Buddha, use spiritual jargon, but mix it all up and throw in some utterly preposterous bullshit. The effect on the unsuspecting listener or reader is a kind of stunned, but highly suggestible stupor.
No wonder he’s still looking. The goddesses have given him the wide berth he deserves. Circe devised a potion to knock herself out and Lilith is out back digging a Mark Emerson sized hole.
Control freak putz extraordinaire!!!
Uber you are so smart it boggle my mind sometimes.
Kinda agree with (low )Saggo poss because of the Jupitertarian meglomania).
Kinda twisted, very.
Absolute gold alright. I too believe he is recruiting / road testing would be cult wives. What a laugh he cant be serious surely…and he is soooo appealing…what a nerve!
Soz meant to off been a reply to saggigal up further. Dont know what happened there??
Oh dear I fear he could be scorp. all that “clever” deliniation between submission and control.
anyhow, who says goddesses have trim waistlines (or an aversion to yellow teeth). obviously has never been to Avebury
http://www.artlex.com/ArtLex/s/images/stoneag_willendorf.lg.jpg
don’t you just adore the crochet beanie on that goddess. I had no idea crochet was so ancient
^_^
no way is he a Scorp. They don’t boast about themselves like Mr Creep does. They’re quietly confident and subtle. Nothing subtle about the weirdo.
Dahling Scorpalicious, I so concur…yes Scorpos DO NOT advertise. They vibe, and that’s about the extent of it. Except for some lower scorps.. but they are few and far between. Far more typical for Scorps to create a Circle of Stun, i.e. you get within that orbit and the gravitational pull can be ridiculous..
I would comment a bit further about the gentleman but one things is obvious, he’s not the man for me because i can’t be fussed to read the rest of it!
Am going with Leo Sun, Gem Rising, Libra Moon… ? No offense to those with the same astro signature.
I concur…been thinking about this and I do think there is some low Libran in their somewhere…’cos they must have the most beautiful maidens/or whores in all the land…so speaketh the ego…which brings me to yes there must be a large amount of low Leo in there somewhere and low Gem too. It is atrocious PR…and yes Scorps don’t need to advertise…they do just send out sonar.
tee hee…I just had vision of a Scorp with gravitational pull akin to black hole. Said Scorp stands near viable women (/men): they suddenly start to slide backwards and once realising what’s happening, scrabble madly to try to retain grip on Real World, clutching at chair legs, carpet, etc in an effort to oppose the power of the Vibe. But alas: Voomp! suddenly they are sucked into Scorp orbit until the black hole spits them out in a different dimension and somewhat rearranged.
xx
UP, welcome to MY world.. yes! You have just describe the Absolut Plutonic, haha…
LL, I think the ferocity with which he tries to couple plus some of the…clamminess really makes me go for the lower Libran influence. The best water signs can manage would be to go over mushy, but this whole thing is so…theorized, hence some misuse of the air influence.
UP that seems a pretty apt description.
FA it’s just awesome in its awefulness.
UP – “Scorp with gravitational pull akin to black hole”
that’s a BRILLIANT vision… hehe
FA – so is Absolut Plutonic! The ad for it could be the gates of Hades in the shape of the bottle.
Would be awesome if Absolut released a limited edition astrology range.
Absolut Plutonic would have to be a black / dark red vodka. Squid ink? Mulberry?
Absolut Plutonic would be a crystal ice cold vodka with a swirling strand of blood red pomegranate, offered to one with a tempting mysterious smile right at the gates of hell… hee hee
FA,
That sounds divinely wicked…So ~SMARTS~ on the way down, that must be sipped little by little as lethal sting to it…
My sister’s husband, a Gemini with Capricorn Moon (don’t know rising), calls her ‘Goddess’, primarly. She’s an Aries, Leo rising, Libra Moon.
When I last told her off (we have not spoken in nearly five years), I told her that maybe one day she’d get to the bottom of why she needs validation outside of herself as it goes back to childhood and she has issues she simply has not delt with…Do understand….
Its not unreasonable of course to be human and want to feel loved and belonging to something/someone, but did feel at times that the ‘Goddess’ thing was a bit OTT. Then again, they met at a woo-woo workshop…
So there ya go…Goddess weirding in action…
Sweetpea darling when someone claims to be a Goddess yet do not have the generosity of spirit, spaciousness of soul and depth of compassion to make such claims, or at least takes it to insane heights, methinks there is only one thing to do.
Shove a piece of lead under their nose and ask them to turn it into gold. If they can’t do the alchemy, they ain’t goddessy.
hee hee
oh god. i hope he’s not a scorp, i like most scorps far too much for that. i’ve never met a scorp who could hide their intensity under a veneer of hippy woo woo goddess-worship either.
cursed! that anonymous was ME! have moved computers…. forgot to reset name x
Cancer ? Pisces ? hmmm.
After scanning most of it I got more and more sus as I read. He contradicts himself on quite a few occasions. He talks about love, spirit , light etc. but works for a US aerospace co. that basically builds war machines, and has a very dark past. So he is either an idiot or totally unaware that he works for the dark side ?
He talks about his health ‘regime’ so many years of gym, meditation etc. The body shot looks like someone who does or has done little work, the posture etc.
He has heaps of head shots, like 2 would have sufficed? whats that about ? He mentions that his teeth look yellow in the photos and will soon be whitened ? shallow to the max ? This is the sort of guy that women should and obviously do steer clear of. He is so sure he is an angel , but has all the attributes of a smiling axe murderer. He lives in a fantasy world that is a total cliche’. Its like he took every new age cliche’ and put it up on the web. Oh, yeah, and he mentions that he shows applications to his friends, and they have a good laugh ? As the robot in Lost in Space would say ‘danger,danger’ will robinson.
“As the robot in Lost in Space would say ‘danger,danger’ will robinson.”
I’d wanted to use that quote the other day but could not remember Will Robinson’s name!!
Oh the pain, the paaaiiiiinnn !!!
“He is so sure he is an angel , but has all the attributes of a smiling axe murderer.”
I know one man whom this description would fit perfectly with regard to mating/coupling/loving relationships. Schizophrenic.
Pisces!
Scorpio!
‘If she has been a prostitute, that is GOOD!! We can discuss it at length. I have written a book (not yet published) entitled, Resurrecting the Innocence in Prostitutes. Fascinating topic! And it’s an important part of my Global Vision.’
I think I’ve been rendered speechless
I think there’s a fair bit of water there – check out the eyes (he has that vulnerable/weak watery look). I feel very sorry for this man but I also feel that the whole thing is scary – one of those headshots does look axe-murderery. shiver…..
and there’s the piscean spiritual thing going on but maybe a libran ego-centricity. I don’t think the hair is quite right for Leo – it’s not beautiful or dramatic enough.
I think you’re right something fishy. A Leo would have only posted whitened teeth photos and probably had hair transplant first. Seriously some of those pics are really bad and creepy. Why post so many???
I’m still laughing so much I’m leaving this site for awhile to calm down.
after reading his bilge, I think I need to go and gently wash my brain……….
Chesh exactly…and also to UB’s comment about it glomming onto her chi…(or at least that’d how I was feeling) like scary little tainted tentacles were trying to attach like so many electrodes to my aura. I realise that sounds just a wee bit dramatic….but eww eww eww.
Sorry that would be UV.
What a load of CRAP!!! With his self involvement and activities, how could he have time for any sort of relationship. I think he’s spent too much time alone so’s convinced himself that he’s something extraordinary. I feel it would be insulting to any sign to classify him as belonging to any. I’ve known two men with similar FIGJAM tendencies, one Scorp one Sag but he’s worse.
He grew up in the 60s and DOESN’T LIKE ROCK MUSIC. Says it drains energy or something. Probably blocks him from talking and thinking about himself. TOSSER!!
and he has a limited Goddess vision. Where are all the wonderful ancient earth mother images of beautiful buxom women. His Goddess image is pure fashion mag. or screen goddess
Yes, how dare he use the word ‘goddess’, when he means Biddable Bimbo?
But enough about him! Time to go do something in nature i think.
Hey Chesh, amidst giggling at everyone’s wonderful feedback I came to your “FIGJAM” and I am truly stumped. Please do translate, if you have finished “gently washing your brain”! I sooooo love your sayings and I hope you dont mind me storing it in my word arsenal?
I am sure no goddess in her right mind would touch him with her toe! Hmm ….unless he pays one to!
FIGJAM = Fuq I’m Good, Just Ask Me
love it!
Heh Heh thanks hazelblackberry and Chesh. Truly hilarious : >
F uq I’ m G reat J ust A sk M e…….
I think this dude got seriously clobbered on the head by a flying bong at Woodstock while listening to Janis and purving on some naked groover-gal and has had his metaphors muddled ever since. Hence his aversion to rock music and his search for the goddess. He’s sort of taken all the best of the 60/70s and bent it.
Too funny!
*snorts with laughter*
He’s made me a titch angry too. Scary Mary is that man or alien?
Pisces sun maybe but there’s a lot more to it than that.
He doesn’t give birth date?
Looks like spawn of satan to me, yellow teeth and all.
Am very wary of peeps that call themselves ‘lightworkers’.
” But if you get to know me, I will make you laugh and laugh and laugh! Seriously!”
Oh… he made me laugh and laugh and laugh, alright. Just not for the reasons that he would be hoping for.
I think this web address should be changed from ‘find my goddess’ to ‘you’ll laugh, you cry… and you will probably want to root me*’
*in your dreams buddy. The kind of lady you want is too classy to go near you and you know it.
I will not go near any starsign for this guy… it will just be bad ju-ju.
Ahahaha!!!
So I did go back and read more. I LOVE this line:
I want her to assert herself as strongly as possible, and if I am wrong about something, I will welcome her passionate attempts to persuade me to change my position.
It doesn’t matter what start signhe is, he’s A Creep.
I looked at the photo on his site & couldn’t help imagining they had to photoshop the dribble off the corner of his mouth…
control freak- low capricorn
Abuser-if the woman is betrayed or harmed, he wants her to still love unconditionally.
If his partner is angry, he says she deals with it by looking within herself, thereby procluding the option of communicating to him if she’s angry about his actions.
Did anyone else think the “i’m about to be a gazillionaire” spiel read exactly like those scam emails from Nigeria? The ones that dangle wealth b4 u, but due to a (insert story), you have to pay them first.
Loved all the comments.
totally clear eyed, i was thinking the same thing. beneath his blah blah goddess worship are some really stone-age ideas about women. AND he is totally controlling as per his list of criteria for his goddess AND he is so obsessed with power and control and ‘submission’ in relationships that he has included an essay on that in his personal ad AND invented a whole new lexicon to try and justify his controlling tendencies as somehow being about ‘the goddess willingly surrendering’.
if you wanted a clear picture of him, you’d definitely ask the ex-wife.
but then ‘she may not see things the way i see them’. he’s not in touch with reality and he doesn’t particularly care.
I reckon he is an off the planet Aquarian (as opposed to on the planet Aquarians that are fresh air at its best)
I agree ….Up himself Aquarian
Screaming low Aqua. Its all I could think the whole way through…. World vision, immense faith in own intelligence, specific, fixed notions of the world…….. And cheerful verbal diahorea… Aqua
Have a GORGEOUS Aqua patient (Moon in Scorp on my Neptune so the vibe is comfortable in a healing environment. His cute little blonde wife comes in with him though and gets her massage with another therapist and I don’t feel “that certain something” anyway…)…
BUT! He’s a Republican bible thumper and me a Democrat heathen..lol
Told him today that if he ends up telling me “I told you so” with the politics here, I’m throwing him out of my massage room…He’s very set in his views and so for the sake of a peaceful massage, watch my words wisely and keep it in balance of not taking sides…
I only knew one other Aqua Man…my neurosurgen. He was the best Dr. ever and literally saved me but, an idiot in dating terms. Just found out last week he died…
Bless him. I’m walking around pain free because of his genius. Went to Oxford…
What does this have to do with this thread? Not sure beyond Aquas in general….
and Aquas are into cyber sex from what I’ve been told…….more into talking it in a behind the scene sort of way than actually doing the wild thing
oops, talking ‘about’ it……
OMG Chesh..
Over dinner one time, told the Aqua Doc that he uses his computer as a shield (I mean he was a very busy doc but he never picked up the phone! A girl needs something more!) He was sorta pissed about that cuz I let him have it but later he said he admired that…
You know I was just about to pipe in to say, noooo.. BUT just remembered I actually managed to seduce the Well Hung Uranian via IM as we reminisced over certain parts of the Exorcist, and how I suddenly bought a huge wall sized mirror!
So YES, technology definitely plays a part in their sexual repertoire!
Creep alert!!! I am disturbed and more disturbed. Did anyone read the strange little hex thing right at the end? This guy is a total nutter. I agree with the yellow teeth bit and puffy eyes, if he’s so pure and healthy, why???
i think because he’s in his sixties and not 58 or whatever he says. He’s 10 years older than he says he is.
I think Aqua with scorpio rising!
omkg he’s crazy
I agree Matty, with maybe an Aries moon??
thanks
im glad that someone thinks the same as moon! LOL!
yes deff aries moon or maybe a leo that might’ve given him the shovenistic edge! or maybe aries moon in leo…?
Wot I actually loved as I read was the rhtyhm – can never spell that work – i got into reading it. Sort of oh-okay, that sounds reasonable, yah, meditation is fab and it’s good to….WHAT THE FUQ????….And then yes, well it’s a reasonable expectation that….OH MY GOD…
Very true. He was probably trying to hypnotise with his charms
hey mystic future reference – rhythm
and what I was thinking (amongst other things) while reading it was that he could have saved the whole fuqing world in the time it took him to prepare his neurotic screed/job description/manifesto!
Ewwww!
Yuk icky yuk……… He obviously underestimates women’s intelligence, what woman would seriously find anything appealing about him. Although he did make me laugh only because I was cringing in my chair so much I nearly fell off it.
‘I have yellow teeth in the photos but just had them whitened & need to update new photos’ Look I only have one flaw, my teeth & I kindly pointed that out to you… Really?? I bet he smells like moth balls too.
Can you imagine the conversation of the first (& only) date……
‘So enough about me…. what do you like about me?’
I don’t want to know that much about anybody, way toooo much icky information.
Star sign, I can’t think….
OMG… A total misogynist. I actually feel sort of dirty after reading it and I am too scared to laugh. What the hell does this guy think he is emitting into the Universe?
I fear that no astrological sign would ever want to claim him… let’s hope he is really an ET from some far away planet who doesn’t want a Scientologist because they may cotton on to his secret. But if I had to guess: Sun- Pisces, Moon- Aries.
“What the hell does this guy think he is emitting into the Universe?”
Hopefully not his sperm…
lol. so true Sweetpea… maybe this is what it is all about anyway… natural selection. delusions of self = no partner and consequently no sex and no chance of offspring. one does have to wonder how he has managed to perfect his loving. surely there have not been guinea pigs silly enough
DIY
though he says he has three adult sons doesnt he? hopefully not imparting his genius ways with the ladies to them…
no no no noooooooooooooooooooooooo
I am pisces-aries… (with Leo rising, don’t make anything of that)
My thought was alien………seriously reptilian.
LOW Pisces, slithery.
YES Scorpionic, me too! I barely got past skimming then I had to skidaddle on out of there… and specially when he got to the sexuality bit, just the thought of his face beaded in sweat…eeeeeeuuuuuuuuwwwwww.
I think I need a shower…and I apologize on behalf of all of us who reside in the City of Angels, but yes, sometimes the insanity of this city breeds a brand of New Agey – “I am a Renaissance Man” sort of crap who would just as easily take you to task if you happened to set a frosty glass of something down on a glass table leaving a mark.. the “engineer” bit is loaded. Maybe its all those aviation fumes he’s been sucking in?
davidl had a good point about the mug shots..er I meant head shots, I mean after the nth I was beginning to feel like I was in the Smithsonian.
So who’s going to volunteer to email him to ask him what sign he is?
lol, i think Mystic should do it!
It will be the ‘send me a reply asking another question’ question (like the World doesn’t know enough about him already)
he says a lot about what he a) has done, b) wants to do and c) what he wants but not a lot about who he IS.
Totally true from what I deduced sf as well. He’s looking for someone to prop HIM up…Sad…
Then again, there comes a time when one does seek someone to prop them up (like older age)…See it all the time here in Palm Springs. Lots of rich, older men..lonely….wanting someone to be there when they croak over….
Just being realistic…And remaining single…
There’s a saying in French, which I unfortunately do not speak in any fluency whatsoever, but roughly translated is something like, “when one does not have time to build a house (i.e. a relationship), one buys one (i.e. a gold digger).
You know I am getting the weirdest vibe that he may hit it off with that diaper wearing astronaut…remember her? I mean, she’s been to outer space and eats pellets, surely she would qualify.
Agree with all comments above,but what jumped out to me was the hypocracy of TV situation —-hasn’t watched TV for 40 YEARS (!!!!) but is making a series to bring his ”ENLIGHTENED” messages to masses !!!! What a truly truly false prophet. Also picked up on his job + obvious immorality there. Could one amongst us reply + expose him for what he obviously isn’t?
I’ll say Sag because he describes himself as a “global visionary” and also the part where he specified hair length reminds me of a Sag profile i read when i dabbled in internet dating. I thought it was completely absurd to be that specific.
Mr Creep above also said he has loads of friends and this particular Sag i communicated with online had 700 friends on Facebook. He was full of himself and i knew they weren’t “real” friends!
oh no! I just find this and the link does not work! Made a coffee and all!
http://angelbase.com/ check this out
good detective work SF, this guy is some piece of work !
This just gets better – he’s completely INSANE – and note he’s put the creepy axe-murderer picture of himself on there WTF!! He’s asking for donations and he posts THAT picture
Thanks something fishy – I haven’t laughed this much for ages – hopefully this will keep the swine flu at bay
tax-exempt, non-profit humour, too, if you read the fine print. It sounds like a cult.
yeah, and he’s looking for A Tammy Faye
LOL – love the photo caption: “Mark- Chief Angel” !!!
am still cacking myself, its soo creepy and gross! but love the way he intends to heal the word with his Angel based computer paradigm! So bloody hilarious…
“theres nothing like this on any drawing board of any computer company i know…” YEAH- because its NUTS!
its almost too bizarre to believe.
Okay this is just way too strange. I wonder if you have to “donate” money to his cause (as a sign of your dedication and support for him) so THEN he can take you on a date and pay for everything
Do you notice how virtually none of the website outlines what the hell is product is… only that we will all be using it one day all over the World.
He is a nut case.
well done SF, did you notice that one of His goddess images is also an angel named Veronica. Waaaaay too much time on his hands. Will someone please pass the Coolade
Is it spiked Chesh?
hahaha, I did notice her name was Veronica and she is the guide on his ‘business’ website. Named after Betty and..perhaps?
You found it!!! Excellent, it IS a $$$’s cult!
We all have good intuition.
Oh in the name of all angels, I revoke thee! This psycho is giving us winged ones a bad name !
Chief Angel?? Like who? Lucifer?
It’s Mark at work…with a character refernece from a ‘loan broker’ and everything – this guy is impressive !!
Sacred Investment. Be awesome telly to doll someone with long hair & a trim waistline + a Shakti t-shirt to go meet him…
Mystic, when your darling eyes recover, I think you are the gal for the gig! Go Fish! Your waist would be suitably “trim” I don’t think I could do it, cos i have a very strong urge to poke a chopstick in his eye. Ooops, did I just type that? Muh-hahaha!
hehehe I’ll do it………………..mwahaa
the TV that is. and THEN the chopstick
Yes, but let’s hire a Lady Boy, ya?
I’d love to hear what his ex wife thinks about him and this site
I dunno about star sign.. thinking maybe Sag with Scorp Moon
oops that anon was me….
Absolutely…She’d give a real 411 low down…
I’m getting flashes of John Fowles book, ‘The Collector’ (collects butterflies and …women, in the cellar from memory)….more shivers
oh YES! great book!!
that book is so depressing. I was like wtf.
i read it in my teens when i was a goth. It appealed to me then. I’m intrigued by the creepy and macabre… naturally.
Great 1964 movie with Terence Stamp…
Hi Everyone – a search of his domain name lead me to this website
http://angelbase.com/ – yep stalkerish, but further info…
His full name is Mark L D Emerson, Chief Angel…there he is close to the bottom of the page.
I think low Sag too….or very off kilter Libra
Actually I hoped there’d be an About Me to glean his birthday from….just grasping, cos I want to know so badly
i searched his domain name too but i think that comment got snagged for moderation. Found a Mark L. Emerson in Culver City (near LA) with June 1951 as birthday… Also another with same name born in LA but in 01-31-1953. The year is a little off for him to be 58. So i don’t know.
Well detected! But yeah – all his stats seem to point to him being born in Nevada I think.
you think he might be BSing when he says he was born in downtown LA? could be. It costs big bucks to live in the Palisades.
I’d guess that is the case – since b-essing seems to come so naturally to him. But that June 51 birthday would fit and make him a Gemini – which also fits….
OK i did search Las Vegas and found one there:
1-14-1952 , hmmm… a cap?
i used this site:
http://www.birthdetails.com/ because i think he has removed or restricted his info on zabasearch.com
Does that one include all his initials Fox? I can’t believe I’m so invested in this mystery lol – but I could understand Capricorn at a push. The funny thing is – there’s a sub-thread on this thread higher up of people discovering all of this ahead of us that I missed – lol
the 1-14-53 is a real possibility. My first hubbo is 1-14 but different year and after we split he did a pretend he was a guru act to attract females. Completely spaced out and often stoned. It amazed me how often he had acolytes but he was good looking and bloody charming. As I read the screed I thought it sounded a bit like him.
@ cheshire cap: Yup. I know 2 other older cap males who do the guru thing as well. They were once “star athletes” or something in their younger days and love to amaze young beauties with their tall tales. so gross.
I had originally guessed aqua, leo or scorp but i’m now convinced low gem or low cap or low aqua. He is too picky for leo and most scorp men i know are not that picky about physical appearance.
@1-Virgo-1: None of those sites contain his whole initials. In fact it is truly odd he has that many middle names for an American. I wonder if his parents are british or something. When i first saw his name, I thought it was 2 separate people: Mark Laurence & Douglas Emerson.
Possible with the 1-14-52… my sleuth sources ID him as being 58. I’m not willing to pay for a background check but..I’m wondering, could he be the long lost love of the Octo-Mom???
Something is vibing they might be it for each other, 8 kids = instant cult, overexposure, tendency to overshare…
Administrative Contact:
Donald Emerson, Mark Laurence
Holy Realm of Surrendered Service
9775 Maryland Parkway #F279
Las Vegas, Nevada 89183
United States
(702) 806-5791 Fax —
Just spying the table of contents was enough for me to nearly turn back…Run…Run for your life!! LOL
Well okay…”Alcohol free…or nearly so”….Cab wise, that let’s me out. Pity…
“Has all her own hair”…Hmmm, kind of a double standard there as a bit more of his own would only be fair..
Cracked me up that he has a list of things that DO NOT count toward the 15 minute minimal meditation /spiritual practice time. Feels 15 mins. “pretty minimal for a goddess”….Yeah, that’s some lazy goddess (chuckle)….Maybe his standards not so high afterall?
I wouldn’t have a clue about what sign he is but I liked what Saggigal said about Sagg’s as it reminded me of someone my girlfriend was seeing who was on a bit of a similar trip and he had a wife he was not sleeping with (sure)…but two other women he was…..
“Mark Emerson”
Chief Angel
Yes, good one SF…
Teacher once said that angels (incarnated in human form) are not usually all that comfortable with having an ego. Mr. Emerson seems to have no problem!!
Sure knows how to mess up the spontaneity esp. if hoping to meet a “soul mate’…
“Has all her own hair”…Hmmm, kind of a double standard there as a bit more of his own would only be fair..
LOL. Hmmmm for one so spiritual he is very very picky on the physical must-haves and must-nots. I think the person fitting this description would actually be running the planet, solving world hunger and negotiating world peace and not dangling from Mark’s puppet strings. He’ll probably never understand why she gave him a miss….
Yes, can you imagine A REAL goddess dancing to his criteria…
Please…
She’d tell him to go flip himself and do it on his own damn alter…
*LOL*
On seeing the first photo, I also thought Leo (because he looked a lot like an old Leo boyfriend of mine). But I can’t get the thought of Male Gemini out of my mind – the control freaking, new-agey, suppressed aggression, hypocritical belief system and ‘forgive me while I’m power tripping and denying it’ stance just seems so male gemini to me. All about him too.
Wow – now you mention it. Yes! He has to be Low-Gemini…surely, that person you describe is exactly like an ex of mine too….and that website ad thing is ALL about him after all
my lord yes…. and the way that only a low gemini would think themselves capable of getting away with such absurdly large lies. I mean, the guy runs his own frakking Ponzi scheme and it wouldn’t shock me at all if his whole CV was made up too, eg. ‘i ran a student backpacking company while in college’ yada yada.
and he probably is lying about his age, too.
i like geminis but so many of the ones that i meet tend towards the LOW aspects of their sign.
OMG you are so funny
i cant access the link…..maybe he’s an alien or psychic and knows we are blogging about him like this
) The photo sure looks like a ‘beware’ face to me. I really want to read his spiel now.
aqua annie
if the link doesn’t work for you just go here:
http://www.findingmygoddess.com
or copy and paste that address in your url.
Wow! But what if all he claims turns out to be true? I reckon we’d have the second coming!
My favourite section is this:
‘If she has been a prostitute, that is GOOD!! We can discuss it at length. I have written a book (not yet published) entitled, Resurrecting the Innocence in Prostitutes. Fascinating topic! And it’s an important part of my Global Vision.’
Does that mean instead of churches we’d have bordellos instead?
Bring it On oh wise one…:-) or perhaps in his case this signature may be more appropriate.
:-
Am I the only one who gets that living in L.A. is symptomatic of someone who has no clue re: inner and outer quality of life? All the rest is inconsequential. To me that alone disqualifies him from any further consideration!!! What a typical la la land jerk. (Yes, I lived there for a couple of years in the mid 70′s.)
thanks ladies I’ve had some great laughs reading your comments.
Well, I’m a hundred twenty miles east of la la but I must defend that all are not nuts….
Maybe 120 mi. does make a diff? But then I’m nuts…
Don’t think it matters where I live….
Kalika, I DID officially apologize on behalf of my fair city for this kook.
Though yes on the symptomatic – PLUS isn’t this just so boomer??
It’s just such deluded spirituality. Trippy is the word that springs to mind
Interesting as Eckhart Tolle (German), said he had to write his books “on the west coast” (California). He didn’t know why.
Perhaps this is called the City of Angles for a reason. I’ve never given it much thought as been here since I was one year old. Europe is such a wonderful place but the energy here is very light and one notices it after being in Europe. Somene said that the further west you go, the freer you feel. Maybe for Australia as well?
Huh. I thought Eckhart wrote his books in Vancouver…or maybe he just lives there now?
There is something different about the light here…when its not being hindered by the smog, hee hee
He said he landed in BC but came further south…(if I recall properly from an interview…)
Well, Clyde, from what he claims, not just the second coming but the third, fourth, fifth, sixth…..
OMG another one!
The person suffering from Narcissistic Personality Disorder (hard to say with a lithp) has:
1. Has a grandiose sense of self-importance
2. Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance,
beauty or ideal love (megalomania)
3. Believes they are “special” and can only be understood by, or should associate with, people (or institutions) who are also “special” or of high status
4. Requires excessive admiration
5. Has a sense of entitlement
6. Is interpersonally exploitative
7. Lacks empathy
8. Is often envious of others or believes others are envious of him or her
9. Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder
and he’s on his way to world domination!!!! imagine the number of people all over the world who have been devoting hours of their time to reading and researching this man!!!!!! It’s driving me nuts!!!! Can someone solve the mystery quickly!!
I think the last thing any prostitute goddess would want is HIM slobbering all over her and crapping on about innocence regeneration or whatever. I like how he puts GLOBAL VISIONARY in caps. I HATE to say this but i think he is a LEO with Gemini or Aquarius rising.
And yes, he is obviously against hair extensions and dentists and televison but he is doing a GLOBAL VISIONARY TV SHOW and his prostitute GODDESS has to have her OWN HAIR but he is bald. Oh don’t start me.
And is he expecting a cabal of prostitude goddesses to fund his GLOBAL VISION through sacred investment. And am i stoned or was he boasting about his sexual technique? Someone shoudl warn Lachie Murdoch of this guys GLOBAL VISIONARY takeover plan.
Aahahahaha your comment made me laugh so hard.
The perfectionist and critical Virgo sun with Aquarius moon and rising, putting Leo on the descendant, making him King of his castle, no less the world.
PLEASE can someone e-mail him, explaining that waist circumference is only exceeded by the dimensions of her brain/expansion of her aura, whatevs and that she TOO is a GLOBAL VISIONARY chanelling angelic insights, currently based in Mogambo (a spa hotel where he is welcome to visit and see how the natives adore her sacred hide) and requiring but a small sacred investment of
10 million (USD) to manifest Angel TV. But that she needs his birth deets to run them through (invisble) celestial database device. It runs on spring water and her gigantic indigo aura – which, on a night without too much microwave interference – can be sensed from as far away as The Palisades, Palm Springs…
Tell him you/she lives in Zemblanity Heights and see if he GETS that. He is a GLOBAL VISIONARY GENIUS with an UNBEARABLE POIGNANT AND AMAZING sense of humour, he will get it. Surely.
And – this would be fun to trigger his Madonna Ho complex. He boasted about his dick being able to stay hard for hours, tantric thingie…SHE boasts that her, um, yoni is legendary – toned by three hours a day of secret Kahuna exercises & douches containing three drops of immortelle essential oil + magnesium.
Seriously – someone set up a damned hotmail & let’s get his birth deets. Don’t say ME. I have enuf to do and you know it…
When Matthew Minerva gets home from school HE can do it! Just say his name is Minerva Matthews, do LOTS OF CAPS & like wow seriously dude my hair is my own, i am thin waisted…
Minerva Matthews – yay!
hell of an out of school project.
WHAT!
LOL WHAT DO U WANT ME TO DO!?!
LMFAOOOOOOO OMG LOL IM TOO MUCH OF A JOKER SAGGO TO RESIST!
YOU WANT ME TO EMAIL THIS EGOCENTRIC IDIOT OF A HUMAN BEING TO TELL HIM TO GET BACK TO REALITY?!
MATT
Matt baby, Your Mission should you choose to accept it is to create an alter ego, i.e. Minerva Matthews of the wittled down waistline and abundant hair, and jailbait the psycho out of his lair. Get him all excited so he runs rushing out of the house barely having time to shove his false teeth in the hopes that your lovely fictionalized personage would appear as a vision.
All this after you get the birth deets of course. If not, this message will self-destruct in 60 seconds.
This is so funny!!! You crack me up.
I think Matthew can pull it off, no? I really do! GO Matthew!
ROFL
my face hurts from laughing soo much today. Mystic is this some kinda record – 190 posts since 10.45 am??? I think this is the funniest post ever. Or maybe I’m just pre swine flu infected.
Matt – if you succeed I’ll shout you a six month dailies subscription, promise – but it’s gotta be the real deal.
My personal favourite:
If she has been a prostitute, that is GOOD!! We can discuss it at length. I have written a book (not yet published) entitled, Resurrecting the Innocence in Prostitutes. Fascinating topic! And it’s an important part of my Global Vision.
Words fail me
Fallen Angel…..WHERE ARE YOU?
He’s in L.A………………………………….SWEETPEA?
Didya read THAT….i have got 2/3 thro’ & haven’t read comments yet. He’s in
same state.
This will be fun!
thanx
x
Hi Pegs,
Did read he was in the LA unified school district. He even looks a little familiar (yikes)…
But couldn’t place him further and some of the gals here did a run up on his “Southland” (LA) whereabouts. Sure FA will have something to add..
Ahh, can’t help but laugh though…Just when I think I’ll get home from work and get to bed early……THIS!! Lol…
So funny. Mystic you’re killin’ me…
HONEYS, surely my spy skills deserve worthier prey??
But I have added bits and pieces i.e. official age 58, in legal battle with church of scientology etc. I COULD do background check, but would rather save my money for a cult of my own choosing.
The whole Vegas thing is an Incorporation tactic designed for ease of set up and tax advantages. I have absolutely no justification, not even a wayward anthropological insight, to explain the steel wool hair, the teeth, the smarmy shirt, or the fact that at some point he apparently worked on something that was some kind of aerial transport, I mean the safety implications alone make me shudder…
I think he spent the 70′s completely high, did a whole reform job and seriously misjudged his charisma by at least several galaxies when he started this cult.. we need to check out the yoyos who commented on his site.
Ick.
He would have to be the 13th sign – A SPIDER!!
LOL!
Snap!
in that first pic I imagine he might grow fangs…
but um, yep, well, I get Leo from him too Mystic… and I’m slightly disturbed by the whole thing. He seems to take the whole law of attraction thing to extremes. Imagine being genuine about what he’s on about?? He does seem to really mean all that stuff and be totally well-intentioned about it.
But, well, I guess all of us here are outside of ‘the beams’ of this guy’s transmission – he certainly doesn’t turn me on (and darn it I really don’t need to imagine how a guy of his age plans to go about all that ‘sacred sex’ he plans to have with his impossibly perfect Goddess!)
especially if he plans to stay ‘drug free’. No viagra then?
Well intentioned as long as he’s in control and his compliant goddess fits the long long long long list of specs. By then she’d be unconscious though, so that could work.
don’t all con-men/narcissists actually BELIEVE their own shit? From my experience with these types they really DO
we all know this guy will NEVER find a woman like that, but I imagine there are plenty of women who’d be just lonely enough to modify themselves to fit his bill. Damn. Its so tragic.
Perhaps us witches could form the putz police and run an awareness campaign to protect lonely, impressionable women from megalomaniac qi vampires.
Either that or send him on a date with Camille Paglia. She’d cure him.
LOL at Date with Camille Paglia. She would so sort him out!
TA darling, I have just had sudden flash that his entire find his goddess page was the result of a decade of masturbating which he “believed” was some kind of sacrificial celibacy stage in honor of tantra as he cannot simply admit to himself that no woman is gonna go there.
Out of his honor for life blah blah he wouldn’t do Viagra, but he’s probably already ordered a penile pump, and has been practicing on this: http://www.realdoll.com/
Secretly lamenting that he is depriving the world of his awesomeness, barf.
Now as to the fangs… in honor of True Blood, I think the very vampires would stir in rebellion at the thought.
bah haha ha Angel!
but speaking of True Blood – he seriously reminds me of that fat old vamp that Amy staked, what WAS his name?
That would be Eddie Gauthier, supplier of V.. except, would you really want this guy’s blood anywhere near you? At least Eddie had the sense to be a bit of a shut-in and keep to himself no?
“The sound of his voice, his words, his appearance, the way he looks at her, his powerful mind, his radiant heart, his intense sexuality, his confidence, his poise, and his very presence…. weaken her knees, fill her stomach with butterflies, send shivers up her spine, make her heart pound, overwhelm her with desire, and make her VERY wet.”
Yeah FA, he wouldn’t get this reaction from a blow-up doll and I can’t imagine any real woman sliding off her computer chair from reading his wants. I think he’s practicing to write is first bodice-ripper. EEEUUUUW!!
Your average bodice ripper is much less clumsy.
yeah, I did say “practicing”
considering he also wants an actress, maybe he’s recruiting for a porn flick??
Darlings, men actually order and LIVE with those real rubber dolls, notice the suggestively open mouth and the er.. conveniently splayed legs, they are all uhm..anatomically correct.
The BBC had a special on it and they had some British engineer guy who described himself as superman saying he really couldn’t understand why women don’t want him. I did feel bad for him..but imagine the shock if you walked into his house and you met the two he had propped up on the bed???
I’m sure he’s thinking..at least they don’t talk back.
omg… he’s got some serious mother issues going on there..
I have *tears* streaming down my face. This is just all too funny. As my friend stated in an email: “Problem no 1 – the statement: She believes what I’m saying _is_ coming from God.”
Am feeling particularly unsympathetic to Gemini men after a run in with a predatory one last week so I reckon he might be a low Gemini. They often seem to be plagued with the misconception that people _constantly care_ what they think. After this and the whole opportunistic Cancerian, I’d like my stoic, far-away, uncommunicative Aqua back, thank you very much.
Blokes. Blergh.
(No, not you Matthew Minerva and Davidl!)
He may be like Obelix and so he swallowed a vat of it in the early 90s when he was a viagra sales rap with a cokehead ashtanga yoga teaching gf and the “invincibility” lingered??? Just a theory. And obviously an ashtanga yoga teacher wouldn’t pollute her body thus.
It’s a bit bloody much for him to ask that his Goddess-Prostitute be alcohol free as just to sit through dins with him would require at least a bottle. Unless they can inject St Johns Wort & lavender oil now???
Angel TV IS actually an awesome idea though.
c’mon Mystic, she would never sit through dinner with him – she doesn’t have TIME for dinner, between all that meditating, staying trim (trimming that waistline!) and perfecting her goddessly self so that she is fit for a sacred sex session, as well as being fit to recieve the Word of God from his lips. (plus he’s got his Goddess working with his three sons on his GLOBAL DOMINATION/VISION, sanctioned and supported by Angels and probably has a secret amphetamine addiction just to keep up with him)
ergh. I definitely feel dirty now.
exactly, he forgot to add that she needs to be pure of the affliction of requiring actual FOOD, towit that she should be a beautiful, clean BREATHARIAN (none of your dirty human foody stuff)
oh, and YEAH angel tv is SO awesome – but who for a host? I vote Dolly Parton (because she so dreamy) or perhaps Whoopie Goldburg, because she does that whole holy aura thing so well.
My father behaved like this right before he was diagnosed as “Hypermanic” and medicated with Lithium.
This person is a Leo (note lion features) in either Sun or Mars.
The rest is malfunctioning brain chemistry.
Guys he’s written a numbered and bullet pointed 30 odd page manifesto in order to get laid!!?? He’s gotta be a Virgo or Gemini with that rant-ability, as well as a bad-guru style Neptunian natal aspect with all that delusional thinking present. If this is as good as it gets “living in the light” pass me the scotch and bring on Armageddon!
For manifesto writing a Leo could/would get all pedantic. I’m still a little shocked he hasn’t provided a pattern for the uniform/piece of flimsy cheese cloth for his chosen one to wear…to inspire more candidates…and the shallow part of me tends to think that in thinning hair in Leos tends to warp something…so again that would fit.
I’m so glad I’m a carnivorous squared-eyed alcoholic.
I emailed him for his birth data… I’ll let you know!
You’re awesome TA!
I had sworn not to spend another second of my life on this dude, except of course to slag him off mercilessly in a Lilith fuelled bitch fest.
ditto but who can resist that? Good on you TA.
Meantime, he says he’s 58 (when web site posted, so 59/60 now), so pluto in leo,saturn in virgo and neptune in libra? Turning 60 and freaking out about growing old on his own?
Oops, sorry, didn’t realise there was a whole other page!
Looked at the photos again – eeeeew – and I reckon he’s a good 10 years older than he claims.
I’m going with low aqua – all talk, no action, controlling, fantasist, given to deception.
http://assme.org/2009/06/25/assme-investigates-gawker-made-him-semi-famous-so-we-give-you-more-mark-l-emerson-chief-angel/#more-5641
Babes, click on the link above – apparently he’s been in legal proceedings with the church of scientology.
Guys, don’t you feel sorry for anyone who has the same name as he does???
i saw this earlier on when I was still in stalker mode – tried to find more info about the legal docs but required registration on the govt dept website. I felt that was getting a little intense…lol
very impressed with your intense investigative work fishy
they say that pisceans are secretive, i know i certainly am in some ways but i LOVE uncovering other people’s hidden information and doing detective work! I used to fantisise about being a Humphrey Bogart-type private eye – i think i used to watch too many old movies. But the internet is just amazing for what you can uncover.
Leo with a good bit of Scorp in the planets – check out the Messainic zeal in the eyes in some of the shots.
Couldn’t read the whole thing, but by jingo he’s quite specific, eh?
Oh goodness, what a catch! Why on earth is he still single????
Thank you Mystic and crew, best laugh I’ve had in AGES.
Couldn’t even get through the first page of his tripe…Yep, doesn’t surpise me he’s a Scientology member…not to be cultist.
Lol Pisces Goat he’s NOT a scientologist. His Goddess-Ho must NOT BE A SCIENTOLOGIST.
No you HAVE to read thru the tripe. It seriously gets better.
Where’s Delia surely she can sort this out???
I’m sticking with my (ahem) *diagnosis* of NPD but as to his astrology I reckon Cancer. Something about the eyes, no astro-rationale for that one.
Cancerian NPD people really truly mean well but at the end of the day, they are dangerous sickos who need help. Sadly when the fantasy they have constructed starts to disintegrate, they get horribly depressed and usually hit the bottle big time. Hence the perfect Goddess/Prostitute in his fantasy world will not drink, and thereby reminding him of the grim times. It’s not about sex either. Narcissists generally don’t like sex very much, it confuses them they would prefer (surprise surprise) to masturbate. My narcissist didn’t like me drinking so I didn’t. Didn’t like me having friends so I got rid of them. Didn’t like me talking to anyone, so I didn’t, and er . . didn’t like me getting out of bed too quickly in the morning. I would lie there incredulous that I was going to have to ask his permission to get out of bed. FFS. Apparently my getting out of bed too quickly was a sign of my disturbed childhood/psychological state. The projection was the stuff of legend.
The repo man came to take his car and once he’d been sweet talked him out of it, all hell broke loose about MY financial irresponsibility.
We went to hell during the most blood curdling rows I have ever had with anyone. I met fire with fire until I finally worked out WTF was going on. I came back from hell, but not the “man of my dreams”–he’s still there. It has taken me years to recover him. NPDs are as you might have guessed my special subject. Very dangerous/disturbed people and very sad too, as it’s all an incredible front for some very deeply rooted and very sad self-loathing.
/ends rant.
big hug Link
Oh Link, I’m sorry one of my lower Kataka brethren pulled that on you, really… but you’re free now and obviously so much the better for it!
Hugs too!
i just re-read this whole thing!
wtf is this guy up himself or what!
A goddess of pure being” WTF!
If you dont like the length of this statement then we are not a match….?
WTF HE CAN STICK HIS LONG STATEMENT UP HIS ARSE FOR ALL I CARE!
SHESH!
No Minerva, I mean Matthew. YOU are to infiltrate by sending him a come hithery email as Minerva Matthews – don’t mention you a male or at school obviously, it could create the wrong impression.
And get his birthday!
DONE! I EMAILED HIM NOW LETS SEE WHAT HAPPENS
Hi Mark,
I am Minerva Matthews and I’m from Ontario, Canada! your profile has intrigued me… I found the length gave it a certain depth by the way and I too am deeply spiritual! I am right into Reiki, numerology, angels, spirit guiding’s & astrology. But I’m sorry to say that to fully accept you as a potential “love” I need a few detail too!
All I need is your birth-date in which I will be able to asses our possibilities!
I hope I haven’t offended you in any way and I’m sorry if I have disturbed you with this email… but I am too am looking for the right one and need reassurance!
ps. I am 175cm tall
I AM 38
and I don’t believe in sending photo’s via email as one it is not safe and two you never know who you might be talking to!
I am a reiki teacher at Toronto Course academy
and I don’t know what else to write!
waiting for your reply
Minerva Matthew’s
LOL
CONVINCING MAYBE NOT WELL THATS THE BEST I COULD DO ON SHORT NOTICE LOL I ACTUALLY CREATED AN EMAIL ACCOUNT minervamatthews@hotmail.com
lol
matt
thats me! ^^^^^^^
lol
sorry
So covert Matt you’ve gone all anon. Here’s hoping.
I’m not sure any of us can be sure what would grab his attention…although I have a feeling Uber Virgo’s Delia Antwerp Aars would understand.
HAHAHHAHAHAH
SHE’D BE ALL OVER HIM
but then would eat him and spit him out like that horrible skirt thing
love is just a fad to her
Delia’s avant garde tastes may be questionable, but she does have STANDARDS.
First of all, she’s still obsessed with the Aries Count and is busy planning a covert skydiving operation to infiltrate his maximum security villa on lake Como.
Second, she wouldn’t approach this knob unless there was something in it for her. So he’d have to be either ravingly hot or deliriously wealthy, but preferably both – and he’s neither. Even if he wasn’t a whackjob, she views monogamy as SO last millennium, and she’d only gotten through the a fraction of his site (after someone coaxed her to it by telling her he was a pupil of Sri Ravi Shankar) when she developed vertigo and a nosebleed. The upshot is she’s sworn off the Stillnox and diet pills since, or at least taking them together.
Perhaps I could of been more specific UV…she would understand, but dismiss out of hand?
Delia understand what would get the mega-putzes attention? Perhaps. Care factor, zero. Delia has mastered the gemini art of ‘you don’t exist’.
He doesn’t register on her radar. And because of all the air in her own chart, when you add more of the hot variety, she goes into a kind of hallucinatory delirium. She thought she developed vertigo from the Stillnox combo, but it was the heady mix of Mr Emerson’s ‘philosophy’ with her own vagaries. She thought she was reading L Ron Hubbard and quit when she got the nosebleed.
Delia is SO NOT waiting in a car for this douche bag to hobble around to open the door for her!!!! Anyways, I don’t think she’d be caught dead in the Volvo he probably drives.
fabulous darling. the veritable high school [albeit male] mata hari you are, sweetheart
xxx
I imagine you’ll be getting some weird shit in that inbox, Matty. Keep us posted.
good luck matty and if there’s way too much wierdness just delete that account…and call the cops !
Fabulous Alter Ego Matthew! The Institute of Sexy Spies salute you… though I wish I heard about this sooner before I let that last message self-destruct into an ashen mess, heehee
I think the Reiki teacher bit is brilliant, he’d SO go for that, if you need pics let me know. I like using obscure foreign porn star pics as they have slightly “I’m-a-crazy-ass-beatch-and-I’ll-do-you-sideways” look – very useful in luring out the psychotic.
Plus let’s face it once his eyes (and it seems his teeth may do it as well) glomp on her er..endowments, all that talk about spirituality will evaporate before you could finish saying Mi-Ner-Va!
Sideways is one of my faves..
Hmm, I’m sure among many oh Fiery One. hee hee
Matt I am copying this from page 1 – realised you may miss it in so many comments:
ROFL my face hurts from laughing soo much today. Mystic is this some kinda record – 190 posts since 10.45 am??? I think this is the funniest post ever. Or maybe I’m just pre swine flu infected.
Matt – if you succeed I’ll shout you a six month dailies subscription, promise – but it’s gotta be the real deal.
OMG FINGERS CROSSED THEN!
THANKYOU!
LOL
IF I SUCCEED OMG !
Very brave and clever! I’m trying to post some links to famous namesakes of yours…
Agent Fishy, I really like you, hee hee
I’d agree with Leo. It’s so all about him he totally missed the presentation.
Just look at all the circa 1991 coding on the webpage itself. He obviously got so caught up in telling us what a catch he is he totally forgot about what the page would look like. Not to mention all the “air quotes”.
I’m confused though about how she’s going to have spirituality at the CENTER of her life, when her life would clearly revolve around him.
Because he is the sun….again with the Leo bleh
did a search and found the following address: http://www.assme.org/tag/mark-l-emerson. Seems he is notorious.
Thanks for sharing that one Kalika…
yeah thanks Kalika. Very interesting.
http://www.linkedin.com/pub/minerva-mathews/7/38/4a5
http://adamwest.tripod.com/people.htm
http://rpiarchives.wordpress.com/2008/07/03/funky-names/
now i’m really ROFL, dear MM you didn’t suggest Minerva Matthews just by chance, did you? or am I just slow to catch on?
Seems there is a real one and a very famous fictional one. The plot thickens…
Well for US$4.95 and can have his birthdate, should I ? or are we confident that the emails will work ?
I can have, soz…. anything can be purchased in the old US of A
Well guess what guys, according to US govt. birth and death records, no one of this name exists ! rats…
I’m hardly surprised. He’s a monumental bullshitter for sure. Did you see the other link with his angel software scam? Did you blow US$4.95 on that?
yep..
I had only to look at his photo and ready his name and I knew – Aquarian with Leo, Aries or Scorpio Rising. What a shocker. The selfishness of this man was what really hit me between the eyes, closely followed by his complete delusion. My vote – Aquarian.
Sorry Mystic, I could not bring myself to finish reading it all. Life is just too brief …
Hello DavidL – are you well, pet? Lucky you have already snagged your “Goddess”. It is lovely how nicely you speak of your beloved.
Im good, hoping this guy isn’t an aries…..and how are you darling tormented one ?
thats me above I just left a dr. smith message for SP
Chook, I’m Ok thanks. I concur and hope that he isn’t an Aries! We just don’t need any more bad press. Things were a bit nutty this morning but that is just the weird astro atm.
I love Dr Zachary Smith – is he your secret alter ego?
If you look at my post near the top on page 1, it will make sense
oh the pain, the pain !!!
LOL…Can’t BELIEVE I didn’t remember the Doc’s name was Mr. Smith….But do remeber now…He was kinda whimpy eh Daveyl?
We used to watch that show here all the time!! (Lost in Space, peeps, just in case you too young!!)
“absolute comic genius”
this would have to be the best post and most fun EVER!!
I’m dying to know what sign he is. Good luck Matt!
Agree, Scorps! ive been chuckling about this all day…and i LOVE that matt (and TA) have written to him…feels like some secret undercover mission. perfecto for moon in scorpio right now. we can only hope he falls for Minerva’s charms…
hehe… i forgot about the Scorp moon!
The poor fuqer! If I were him, i would be utterly salivating at Minerva’s winsome little communique & a Reiki instructor at a college in Toronto, named after a character in Batman whom Catwoman actually ripped off! And yet it is also the GOddess of Wisdom – if he really is ALL that, there should be a really witty response referencing Batman & Reiki & Minerva aka Athena all in one go!
Or he might send MM a check-list for him to fill out & he will have to do in bloody geography & get totally done by some teacher thinking he gone totally flippo, filling out crap about his long blonde hair but not extensions and the Reiki practice in Reality Toronto for the perusal of dude in LA.
Lol, the image of Matt sitting in class writing as if a canadian reiki goddess is TOO funny
LMAO SAGGIGAL I AM A CANADIAN REIKI GODDESS!
LOL
IT MY PRIVATE PROJECT LMAO
ok…. have read the lot….. of bullsh…… mmm must be from the land who think they rule the world…… last time i checked a woman with this much ability talent beauty and brains would not need a faulty part of the male species to make her life complete
A pity that he doesn’t live in the land of aust as he would have learned a few lessons about females and how the real world works….
As for us mere mortal goddess… we should probability skip this male and hope that his computer business never makes the millions he has in mind as he may just make our world a worse place than it already is….
P.S. why would we waste our time/minds on replying to his web site…. we can find much more interesting things to do…….
because it’s fun….
I posted some links above but no-one’s going to see them now so I have to point out that Minerva Matthews was a character in the original Batman – am I the last to work this out? I thought that was very funny…kind of adds to the whole Carnevalesque OTT of this whole thing.
To celebrate the second thread with over 200 entries I just went and bought some grey trackies …..
you sexy thang….woohoo
Woof! There’s one more.
Seriously my son keeps checkng on me as he’s never heard me laugh so much (and I have a cough which makes him scared I’m choking). He’s in bed now though.
oh lord the grey trackies… i thought we would never speak of them again! *shudder* bad (regretful) times!!
This is a far more fun way to get to over 200 comments!!
you’re right FF there is something in the air, ive been laughing all day…maybe its the release of all the tension from the last two eclipses etc…? just getting a serious case of the giggles??
whatever it is, i love it. such a good vibe!
I know – I feel like I’m on happy gas or something – totally surreal.
I remember that….Never went to bed that night as blog went ape shit….I love it when this blog goes A.S.. Love cerebral chaos of the most amusing kind. Sorta like it did here with Mr. Luv Machine…
Woooo!
I think whatever it is in the air is starting to get to me! LOL. Nothing like a good chuckle
one must be comfortable when reading through 278 posts
davidl, in my experience, trakkies – grey or otherwise, are quite subtly complimentary to a man’s er…oh fuq, let me just say it, nethers. Is it just me?
I think a beautiful soft pair of trakkies just kind of tent the right way…oh it’s the moon in scorp, truly it is..hee hee
lol FA you’re right! I hadn’t really thought about it before.. re complementary-ness of nethers/groinal region (hahaha i love how delicate we’re being ,not) so, it’s not just you. it;’s the fabric. and the ass
thus trackies on the right person: kind of hot. it’s the relaxed man vibe.
omg and moon IS in scorp, I *was* wondering – overwhelming urge to add scorpy accessories for work outfit today (+ aviators). i love moon in scorp.
UP you should see me at the gym trying not to injure myself from ogling! haha.. yes far more appealing than somebody who comes up there in spandex bike shorts, bulging in all sorts of places and generally looking like they might sporadically yell, “Extreme Man!” in their own version of Tourette’s!
I have a Scorp tattoo on my left hip so I think I’m pretty much as scorpionically accessorized as one can get…
I’m so jealous – for some reason I can’t get into his site!!?!?!?!?
The comments are cracking me up tho… Anyone have any suggestions as to why?
Look on the first page of comments, someone else had the same problem and scorpalicious put up a link. Aw, heck, here it is http://www.findingmygoddess.com
that’s weird!! I was just checking the link you posted and I can’t get into the site either and i’ve tried different browsers and Mystic’s original link as well. Maybe the server crashed from too many peeps trying to access the site.
above link seems to be working from my computer…strange…
definitely something fishy going on
The link was working just fine today at work.
argh…see, it’s my fatal effect on machines and electrical equipment!
Thanks UB. It didn’t work from my lappie but managed from the iphone
I was gobsmacked… Then I thought, hold on I’M his goddess!!! LOL
I’m still trawling through the rest of the comments but I reckon he’s a Leo.. with some scorp going on somewhere? Just way too into himself and soo over the top with the sex stuff
Do you guys have kiddy safe computers. Maybe the censer gremlins deem his site unsafe
I think this guy is Virgo with Mercury in outerspace and Venus up his arse, it’s a shame he is such a total plonker king because I have all the attributes he requires.
You have? Do tell …
Helpless with laughter! Thanks for a great chuckle MM!
holy mackeral – I was just about crying laughing reading his list of demands. But of course he is not controlling. I don’t think the woman he requires exists in this realm.
And all that crap about how trim her waist has to be or she has to be prepared to trim it – no exceptions. It almost makes me feel as sick as when I just read on the smh site about the stuff up on the 2dayfm lie detector test today where they forced a 14 yr old girl to answering all these questions to her mum about sex on air & she ended up saying she had been raped when she was 12. I just faxed a complaint – it was so awful. How low can they go. And then they offered to pay for counselling – that won’t remove the scars they gave her today to get good ratings.
but the mum said she already knew about the rape – why on earth did she have the poor child in there anyway?
yes that makes it worse – they didn’t know but the mum did. They shouldn’t be allowed to put a child in a position like that just because mum has forced her on there for her 15 mins of fame.
…the venus/pluto opposition in action.
i just saw that on the news LT. Talk back radio is about as low as it gets. Cheap stunts, crap music, lowest common denominator. *shudder* I don’t listen to it. It’s disgusting… so is that story.
Good on you for filing a complaint but i doubt much will change. Kyle and Jackie bring the advertising $$ to the radio station.
yes true SR – probably why I haven’t had tv for years. I’ve never actually listened to their show – only heard that segment online.
I just get so upset at the mindless stupidity of those current affairs/talk back shows – I don’t need that in my life. I probably should be more zen about it.
I spent a week away somewhere with a tv the other week and watched the last episode of grey’s anatomy – I got all emotional and then I was I like hang on- this isn’t even real!! I’m so glad I’m not stuck to a box on a pre-programmed emotional roller coaster every night.
Cancer
was just reading a very funny blog about our mate Mark (not as funny as ours of course
and someone suggests that this guy must be Mark’s son – do have a read! http://gawker.com/news/douchebags/nightmare-online-dater-john-fitzgerald-page-is-the-worst-person-in-the-world-309684.php
Agent Fishy, alas his profile/post reads exactly like about 90% of the craigslist men for women posts do… and is it just me, or does he look like he got rejected by the Sopranos?
Holy fuq…I decided to take a peek at this guy’s site & mega3x
, absolute ROTFLMAO!!!!! Reading all the other comments have been spesh too!
Waiting for Minerva’s reply from this ‘guy’… I know it’s been covered already, but yeah, for a Tantra master etc, he doesn’t look it!!! How do I make one of those rolling-left-to-right smileys on this thread?
However did you find this Mystic!!! FUNNEEEEEE!
UPV – without the fullstop .:roll:
http://codex.wordpress.org/Using_Smilies
Oh MY God….*dumbfounded* :-%!
if i had not seen the site for myself i would have not believed it…
im not sure if matthew is going to get a reply, he needs (underlined) 10 essential items of information
1 firstname 2.1x facephoto 1x full lenght up to date *please* 3.height 4.zip code or local region 5. how you found the site 6.thoughts and feelings regarding his message 7 description of spiritual practices 8. any objections 9. any questions 10. Any additional “information you think might help me confirm your reply is legitimate”
in other words looks like he wont reply until he gets a a complete chapter of a book in reply
he claims he has had 116,000 vistis as of june 2009
“NOTE FOR PEOPLE WHO ENGAGE IN RIDICULE: I delete most negative replies without response. But some negative replies are FUNNY, and after my friends and I finish laughing at them, I occasionally reply just for fun! If you feel compelled to direct ridicule at me, go ahead and see if you are LUCKY enough to get a reply from me! LOL.
I have received numerous prank replies from “women” (and their ridiculing friends) who pose as seriously interested in being my Goddess. Evidently, these ridiculous people have nothing better to do with their lives. May God bless them with honesty and honorable life-purposes, both of which they currently lack. If you are a qualified lady who sends me a serious reply, please accept my apology for the necessity of my doing some detective work to confirm you are legitimate.”
yea i saw that!
HELL NO!
i was like
THIS CREEPY OLD GUY IS MORE LIKELY TO FALL IN LOVE WITH HIS REFLECTION/AUTOBIOGRAPHY THAN AN ACTUAL HUMAN BEING!
As for what sign he is i’d say he’s got a a big Virgo/Pisces Thing Going On (I mean who annotates their lonely ad with a point numbering system?!) a dash of Leo/Cancer thrown in for all that egomaniacal demands, and some aqaurius /gemini for all his towers in the sky
and finally he has friends? ….. are you sure
I think I saw him at a motel he was managing with his mother he said,
really into taxidermy from the look of the place….nice guy, friendly..
I once worked with a nut like this and he was a Taurean control freak who hated Leos……soooo who knows.
Only a Sagittarius male (in search of a Stepford Wife) could write anything so….so…verbose!
My money is on Saggo!
x Kim
REALLY?
you think a saggo did this…?
i know i must sound biased (being a saggo myself) but i do this only a low selfabsorbed Leo or dirt low gemini wouldve been capable…
I’m not even interested enough to click on his link.
It’s the eyebrows.
no thanks.
Hmmm … Aquarius, Leo rising and definitely some virgo or scorp. He would be SO much fun to know. You could write an entire sit com around his character.
Maybe saggo in there somewhere — but I just can’t own that. I really don’t think we’re capable of that kind of self-delusion. I mean — there was a moment where he demonstrated self-awareness and it was a beautiful moment … but then the angel’s called him back to the Light mission (which would obviously fall apart without his leadership).
for all his apparent megalomania, suggested narcissistic personality disorder, hints of psychopathia (controlling etc) and selfish perpetuation of damaging female stereotypes of beauty… DON’T WE ALL OWE THIS GUY A DRINK? who else that brought such joy to so many? And so instantly as on this blog. Bringing communities together, that’s what our mate Mark is all about.
You know, they say the most highly evolved spirutal beings are never really appreciated for their personalities at the time (case in point, our mate Jesus): it’s their EFFECT on the world that matters. I say,, cheeers to mr Brilliant Visionary (c)
, and Ta for the laughs
xx
I strongly suspect this guy has reached the age where he’s doing his own thing and doesn’t give a toss what anyone thinks. Maybe he’s taking the piss out of the online dating services??? He did say that he and his pals laugh at the responses. It all seems a bit OTT and like a bunch of blokes with a few bevies all adding their two cents worth.
you’re right Plutonic…he IS spreading the light!! LOL. bringing joy (in the form of hysterical laughter and bonding of whole internet communities) to the masses…
i doubt he’d have the time to let us buy him a drink tho…not with his ‘HUNDREDS’ of friends!!!
LOL, oh god, i could start up all over again today.
Hate to comment without reading the whole thing through … ( had to bale as I started to drown in all the detail)…but at least this guy is upfront. Respectfully, it took my ex fifteen years to articulate his weirdness.
Nobody has said Capricorn. I have two cap bros and a cap father. My last bf was a cap. Of those four, two (bro and bf) have exhaustive lists of rules and delineations for their ‘partner’. They both want robots, who have no true will of their own, who are happy to tow the line. They are incapable of falling in love due to being to aware of the perceived ‘faults’ of the woman they are with.
My father cap can’t commit as a father. My other brother cap is also afraid of stuff, but a very lovely soul and sweetie pie.
I am a goddess. I was named after a goddess (istar/innana= Istana!). All women are goddesses for eff’s sake.
This guy is an ugly dork. And his waistline is far too big, and he wears sandals with pants. I think he is a total misogynist. I think he is still not over his wife leaving him ( above capricorns haven’t got over ‘true love’, ever) and is ensuring he will never be with another woman. And he is gay. Cos he says he isn’t.
Remember one time a double Cap saying to me “I just want you to be the best you can be”….Uh, I thought I was.
And I’m a Cap Moon so not knocking Caps, but mentioned above that my brothter in law, Cap Moon, called/calls my sister “goddess”. Guess she must fit his criteria but then, she an Aries, Leo rising, Libra Moon and I think he not dare call her anything less…lol
THE NERVE! Though now that the AAC mentioned it my Cappo brother actually BLAMED all his infidelities on his Scorp wife, citing that her weight gain, sloppy house keeping made him do it.
However he did fail to mention what her ginormous salary and utter devotion to him did do.
I am a cap moon too. And dearly love my cap brothers.
Buuuuuut…. I also have a friend who is currently being tortured by a cap…. he is waiting ‘for the one’ too, so she is not up to scratch because she apparently isn’t the one. what the???.
Older cappo bro only dates uber hotties 20 years younger than himself. Then dumps them and starts with another. No way he is ever going to have to face true commitment either.
OOOOH, that so sounds familiar…I have a sort of Cap stalker, some guy I basically told that we could be friends i.e brekkie and lunch ok, no to drinks and dinner… and he purportedly admired me for my quick wit and repartee… except he made me feel like a performing monkey. As IF.
Then he insisted on asking me WHY I didn’t want to be more than friends so I just had to say it plain as day and vanilla,
“I don’t find you attractive though I’m sure some other lucky woman does.”
The odd thing, he STILL sends me text messages asking me out regardless of my saying I am living La Vida Pluto with Le Scorp.
Yep, I said cap way back in the thread
By this time, it WOULD be interesting to know!
And to think if we don’t find out, he’ll be “the one that got away”…sniff, wipe tear…
Yeah Chesh the double Cap was so full of himself that when I broke it off he said “you’ll be back”. It was laughable and I did laugh right there on the phone.
well, here is the response I got back from him:
Dear Danae,
Thank you for your interest in my website.
You have given me no information about yourself (other than the fact that you have an interest in my website). In contrast, I have presented a large amount of information about myself (on my website). It strikes me as odd that you want yet more information about me but offer no information about yourself or your motivation for requesting my birth information. Indeed, you didn’t even offer me YOUR birth information!
Mark
Funny Danae…
cagey fuqer isn’t he ? maybe that babe Minerva will have more luck.
nice observation davidl. very funny!
appeal to his ego too – say you are doing some anthropology phD on red hot lovers who know how to get their needs met (or something a bit more academic sounding than that maybe) – and you are assessing the natal charts to see if there is common aspects.
I was thinking along those lines too libran tiger and fox posted a Las Vegus phone number – studying the astro signature of visionary geniuses and that you are considering making a sacred investment to become an Angel blah blah. Too bad it’s 11.17 pm in Las Vegus right now.
OK, here is the second email he sent me today:
I will disclose my Vedic (joytish, non-western) chart, but not my birth:
Cancer rising, and Venus in Cancer.
Ketu in Leo; Rahu Aquarius.
Saturn in Virgo.
Jupiter in Pisces.
Sun, Merc, Mars in Taurus.
Moon in Gemini.
Vedic astrology uses the sidereal system non?
OMG HE EMAILED ME TODAY TOO!
OMG LOL
OMG TOTAL WANKER … am i allowed to say that … :S anyway this dude replies:
Dear Minerva, We are stuck since (1) you don’t believe in sending photos via email, and (2) I do not disclose my birth information to strangers. Also, I am suspicious of your inconsistent spelling of your own last name… both with and without an appostrophe. Mark
WHAT DO I DO!
LOL
IF ANYONE WANTS TO EMAIL HIM I CAN GIVE U THE EMAIL ACCOUNT DETAILS LOL
Damn…..I’m wanting to take up the challenge now!
You can be our next ‘suicide bomber’ LL, go girl !
YEA USE MY “CHARACTER” i mean its a waste of an email addy…
lol
just call him a bit of a hypocrite because he too cant spell – i fogot an apostrophe – HE CANT VEN SPELL APOSTROPHE!
OMG
So your name was not consistent, eh? Hilarious MM!
I would just ignore it now…But sounds like he has an eagle eye for spelling mistakes…I’m smelling an air sign like my brother in law….Gem Sun perhaps with Cap Moon!!
oooh, my ex was cap sun gem rising cap moon. he was a nut. and very similar with the rules etc.
Here we go again
I’m going to be laughing all night again.
lol im on the floor IM ACTUALLY ROFLING
ha,ha…I’ve GOT to get to bed…lol
This is just sooooo hysterical. I am at work and can’t control myself anymore. I have joined you on the floor MM.
He probably won’t give birth deets because he thinks you’re an ID thief
Darlings, say something about being “spiritual” etc and how you’re shy and just generally say that as you were not sure how serious he was. And goodness no you don’t want the year of birth just the date and time for astro – as surely he would understand being the Chief Angel (and apparently Chief Spell Checker as well) how UTTERLY critical one little request would be to determining the future of the Angel Base Empire, non?
Pander to his ego by saying THANK YOU for noticing the spelling of my last name, that’s M-a-t-t-h-e-w-s WITHOUT an aPostrophe anywhere to be found or hunted down.
but he can’t even spell apostrophe!
LOL I KNOW!
BLOODY HYPOCRITE
Oh yes, double p! I’d surely be using spell check if I was going to answer by email or MM, was that your boo-boo?
You posted just before me MM, soz, it wasn’t you…xo
Thank you for the entertainment!
The most comments I have ever seen for one of your posts
I posted it to my facebook and have been getting thanks and applause for making people laugh all day
The Ungrateful SHIT. If i was like him and i had the double hotness of women with names like Minerva and Danae i would be on my knees in abject fuqing gratitude. And inconsistent spelling of names. W.T.F. is THAT about? He cannot claim to be New Age, spew up all that New Age drivel and yet be apparently unwilling to let us know any astro data.
And SO judgemental with the inconsistent spelling of name shit. Maybe he is actually – brace yourselves as this IS scary – an Undead. Like if you go back to frescos on the wall in ancient Minoan civilisation he is there!!!! And he was also the assistant caretaker in The Shining.
Couldn’t he at least BANTER a bit??? Matthew, e-mail bk and say you’re really into astro and your ANgel told you that you had to be with an Earth Sign – if he can at least confirm/negate that you would LOVE to send him your hot Tantric Reiki Kahuna pix
lmfao! ok!
matt
YES I am officially YOUR Angel, and a real one at that (i.e. I don’t claim to be chief anything) – and I am telling you as I appear in the miasmic fog of spirits from beyond, that the elastic waistband on his trousers is THE sign that you may soulmates to be approved pending birth deets.
In fact you’re channelling right now…
LOL Mystic… see my latest post above for his Jyotish birth deets… I have taken the honesty policy and approached him saying truthfully I am just a fascinated observer and student of astro/alchemy and would like to learn more about the phenomena of HIM. I replied to the above post (telling me vedic astro guff) that I am only interested in western astro archetypes and thanks very much his data is of no use to me… He isn’t exactly charming in his replies…
and yeah, didn’t notice that my name and matts are actual Goddess names did he? So much for worship, ha.
the guy is a total nut. when did he last look in a mirror, or maybe he doesn’t believe in them either…..i keep shuddering.
Soz i mean Minerva and Danae e-mailing me. I know. Danae e-mails back saying you manage a brothel and you want to turn it New Age! make it all about angelic innocence etc etc…But that only someone with a well aspected Mars can work with you on this?
I still have this sneaking feeling that this is the type of guy who googles himself, daily…be interesting if he stumbled across this thread. I mean would he take it all as a compliment?
Is there any reason why Minerva or Danae cannot send him the pic of Kate Moss in the bath reading the How To Help Your Husband Get Ahead book?
I don’t think he’d follow models, would he??? That + the confession that one manages a brothel & is keen for some sort of free-client-angel-innocence restoring book deal tv synergy-new age johns deal could swing it?
Shit you are right. THough I haven’t tagged it with his n ame…Should I? Because he would be SO onto it.
Oh DON’T, because he’d probably get off on it. Literally.
And I cannot stand the thought of that. Nor the vile shirt as Scorpalicious so aptly pointed out earlier.
YEA AND HE’LL HAVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN HE FINDS OUT IMA GUY!
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
STOP making me laugh so hard Matty. My bladder’s about to explode.
LOL!!!
He doesn’t need to google his name, it’s enough that you’ve linked to his website MM. His stat counter would show where this sudden rush of referrals have been coming from i.e, mystic medusa.com. Word press stats unfortunately doesn’t give very many details, but most stat counters give lots and lots of details about referrals, ISP addresses, country of origin, hell some even give a fuqing google map!
Plus, Matt’s emails will show up as coming from ?Australia, (if you are in Australia Matt). Site statistics can be very specific, but where incoming links come from is basic stuff. And for someone of his inclinations, and apparent computing genius, (although his site does look a little crap, (probably a pre-template jobby) ) he will undoubtedly have a stat counter/site meter. No matter though he’ll be loving the attention.
I’d bet money he’s reading it already – all those links to his site/s would be on his log files and he’d be getting plenty of traffic from this site.
U think he reads log files?
Has anyone worked out what exactly the GLobal Vision IS? He is talking of doing a beta v.soon – i hope he does not intend to time it with the launch of the Large hadron particle collider so we have other dimensions opening up AND angelic communication from our tv sets
no but he probably checks his site statistics reports to see the referring sites where his incoming traffic is coming from – he seems like the kind of ego driven guy who would be into knowing who was talking about him.
or maybe not – he could be too busy planning angelic world domination!!
Okay someone with the e-mail address hecate@hotmail.com e-mails him with the i-have-a-brothel-dream spiel and someone ELSE e-mails him chanelling…Dear Ones, We represent the Arcturian Angels and we have chosen you to manifest our glory on Gaia only…we have decided we can’t give you the Lottery numbers for tomorrow night as your Moon is in Pisces…THus prompting him to say-no! My Moon is in xyz.
OK, here is the second email he sent me today(which I posted above, but may be easily missed:
I will disclose my Vedic (joytish, non-western) chart, but not my birth:
Cancer rising, and Venus in Cancer.
Ketu in Leo; Rahu Aquarius.
Saturn in Virgo.
Jupiter in Pisces.
Sun, Merc, Mars in Taurus.
Moon in Gemini.
Well something better than nothing TA – nice try. Can someone translate Vedic into Western astro??
does anyone know how to convert that to western ?
Ketu and Rahu are the nodes…
and I know vedic astro uses the sidereal system, so the constellations are out by about 30 degrees – so depending on which degree, say, his sun is, he could actually be an Aries.
Oh my god I DID miss this.
What a smarty pants!
Wanker.
Okay, Vedic astro is basically about (i always forget the exact) 23 degrees behind Western…So he would be looking at being a Sun sign LEO by our method. Ketu is the South Node-in Leo he says so he born in 1952 but Jupiter i n pisces 1951…Basically this info does not add up.
Because I can find Sun-Mercury-Mars in Gemini with the North Node in Aqua but the Venus is out – it’s in Aries…However he is basically a Taurus with Leo rising, by my estimation and a compleat prick. WAIT
It is TOTAL crap as even if you go with the Vedic, Jupiter was not in Pisces OR EVEN ARIES when the North Node was in Aquarius. So he is just trying to spout shit to bamboozle her
I did vote Leo first I think..but shame on him for even pulling the Kataka out!
I reckon he enjoyed doing this little puzzle, wanker.
I just so want to give this guy my best withering glare. Well, we’ll see if he continues his correspondance with me and comes up with some REAL astro data.
I mean corresponDENCe…
LEO OMG
:O HE DID WHAT!
OMG I SWEAR IF I WILL slap the Slu* (pardon my french) outa him! LOL just saw a movie and that is by far the best catchphrase!
OMG HELL NO!
THIS GUY IS SOOOOOOOOOOO GONE! TRUST ME I’LL BE UP ALL TONIGHT WORKING ON AN EMAIL AND I’LL SEND IT TO HIM TOMROW
OH SNAP IMA CALL THE PO-PO ON THIS HOE HOE
I KNEW IT I KNEW IT. SUN IN TAURUS.
*note that I do have a soft spot for Taureans.
There was just something in his tone that reminded me of one that I talked to on the phone the other night. Low Taurus?
I’ll bet my money he is a Leo… his modesty betrays him.
My comment just got eaten! (I think). If he has a stat counter on his site, he will see that he is getting a bunch of referrals from mysticmedusa.com. it’s enough that his site is linked to for him to back track here v. easily. Plus he’s the kinda guy that would definitely have a stat counter.
Yes he definitely has stats as he brags about how many hits his site is getting at the end of his long list of requirements.
And I think he mentioned he was going to become a billionaire by revolutionizing the Internet so he could escape the middle class…
LT, I’m sure if he just informed the middle class officially on some letterhead that he is indeed a member, they may actually take up a collection to expedite him on out of there!
lol FA you nearly made me drop my iPhone in the bath from laughing
out out damn spot
Heck, I’d contribute. I’d even host a telethon!
Yes, he’d so have a stat counter and would so be following any interest in his favourite subject (him). He’s an obsessive after all, as who else could write such a sprawling diatribe of requirements for his imaginary princess? And he’s manning the PC full time spitting out rejection slips to gobsmacked pranksters.
Hi Mark! Enjoying the attention? Yes Minnie Matthews is an underaged cyber transvestite.
Link had it right when she pegged him as a narcissist. It adds up that his astro is bullshit, he uses a made up name and he runs a memberless cyber cult from Las Vegas. The only tantra he practices is solo and in his head.
Goddesses of the Medusa Circle, we are so not his type.
His page is a ploy to ensnare a wealthy but unhinged Demerol addict and grift himself out of middle class purgatory. He’s anti Scientology because L Ron Hubbard got in first.
Recommended therapy is to lock him in a room with Beth Ditto, Germaine Greer and Ru Paul, with Camille Paglia in reserve. I’d pay to see that.
Oh and the best line of all is Mystic’s “W.T.F. yourself”
Thank u!
They’re not angry enough. Courtney Love would kill him. That bogus Vedic shit is seriously messed up.
i’d love to see Beth Ditto beat him up. I’d pay for that! She rocks!
They wouldn’t have to be angry. They’d take pleasure in verballing him into submission. He’d wish he never dreamt of a goddess.
LOL. so very true. i mean who does that?! oh i would love to put Cher in the mix also
Unbelievable! So many lolz.
I suspect it’s for real and not a big joke on his part … I used to work with a guy a bit like this, same age group (and told women on his online dating profile that he was 16 years younger, I mean he looked a bit younger than in his 60s but not that much!!). He had a long list of criteria for a woman, and went on quite a few dates but on Monday morning when we asked how they went, there was always some reason that she wasn’t good enough. He brought one to a work party and she was much younger, very nice, rather good looking & put up with us really well – but she was “too bossy”. Sometimes I wondered if he just liked the process of dating & the attention of discussing it all in detail on the lunchroom & really wasn’t looking for a life partner after all.
Anyway he was a Gemini, I will look up other chart aspects. He had a definite tendency to over-disclose about himself & his personal life, which I assumed was ego. But at least it was entertaining and provided amusing conversation at work & gossip. He was pretty judgmental but also into spirituality, especially the self-centred sort. Definitely had mother issues & ex-wife issues, ok a lot of older divorced guys do though. And blamed his ex wife for the divorce even though he had had affairs too. Oh and he would tell us about his sex life … It was a bit eww, he was clearly proud of his prowess though, but wanted a dame to be old-fashioned – a lady in public & defer to him. We always put that down to him being of the older generation, different set of morals & expectations. But he never took well to being told it was unfeminist.
Gods, he could be this guy’s slightly more well-adjusted brother.
It’s a hard road finding the perfect woman.
Nowhere near as bad as this guy though.
I did a check on astrodienst with the hindu chart/sideral system and by its calculations – his Yotish details do work out (sorry Mystic you have to remember the north node always goes backward so you have to add 23 degree to get its position- or i think that was your mistake, it gets complicated when you’re trying to do it in your head)
by atrodienst calculations he was born between 5 June and 14th June 1951, any earlier than and venus is in sideral gemini and any later than that and the sun slips into sideral gemini.
which makes him a daradadaaaa…….a western *Gemini* !
with mercury in iether western taurus/gemini
and venus in tropical cancer/gemini
Mars in Gemini – attention to spelling mistakes and ultra long lonely ad
and Jupiter in Aries.
His moon is any where between gemini and libra, my guess is its in libra as then its its close to neptune.
I put in a 10am for his birth time which makes him western Leo rising – so pluto is iether in the first or twelth house…. which kinda fits
if anybody wants the charts i got for him, i dunno if i can put it up anywhere…
Oh, good work…hats off to you for your working that one out!
nice work Antares! It all seems to fit.
Yaaaaaaay I was RIGHT! … not that I’m competitve or nuffin
gosh I’m actually starting to feel a tiny bit sorry for the guy now. It’s like he found Kali instead of Aphrodite here!
I know … 384 posts and counting … what was that about OCD?? LOL
nah, just entertainment
normally i would too but not after reading his replies to Matt and TA – he came across very cold.
that was in response to libran tiger.
yes well i guess if a man goes on a hunt for a goddess he really needs to be ready to accept her in all her faces/waistlines/hair lengths etc
exactly! he doesn’t sound very loving or open to me.
you get what you manifest for! lol!
Awesome work! Yes, I was trying to do several things at once, gazing at the ephemeris & automatically deducted 23 from his stupid node as well. Well he says his Moon sign in the original does he not? Anyway so he is a dratted Gemini – you see i thought even the most mad Gem would be saved by their S.O.H. and a sort of lightness….but no…And Moon in Libra would be more suave, surely…
“Mars in Gemini – attention to spelling mistakes..”
My Mars in Gem and mentioned that in post above…
Although, was pointed out he did not check his own spelling…DID NOT go the extra mile so I wonder now…
Actually, just using this post to see if gravatar shows up…
Oh there she is! My granddaughter when she was quite wee….
And no, do not always spell properly but who gives a flyin’…
my cappo ex who was rather similar with rules and stipulations, he had gemini rising!!
well if hes got that much Gemini in his chart, Mars, Sun and most probably Mercury – then YES it is a very cold calculating love, its only venus in cancer that could offset this and make him warmer or just appear that way especially if pluto is in the first house…. he wont suffer apparent fools gladly
You should really trip him out TA or Matt and send him his own birth chart back – the one he wouldn’t reveal.
Yes! Nice work Antares. Let the fuqer know we know (meaning Danae AND Minerva). Love to see his reply to that.
btw guys has anyone else noticed how ugly this dude is!
I MEAN IF HE WANT A GODDESS FOR HIMSELF – HE BETTER HOPE SHE’S BLIND!
HEY GUYS
I JUST SENT A NEW EMAIL – SHORT SIMPLE AND EASY
Dear Mark,
All i need to know is your star sign thats all!
I know you have your rules ect. and i respect them
i recently entered a a vision phase of my life – Neptunian Weirding! and my psychic later interpreted and explained how i was destined to marry a earth sign being, whether it be sun sign or rising. Do you meet the requirements…?
My name FYI is with an apostrophe but if you have a problem with my punctuation i certianly am concerned about your spelling – “appostrophe” –
….
minerva matthew’s
oh you are going to get a spelling slapback 4 sure minerva
you just snuck in there LT
You crack me up Matt-M!
Well done all, sorry I just had to be the 400th entry ! yay, a truly group effort, but now we know, Im finding him terribly sad and boring.
I’m bored with him now too.
So what’s next? Can we have a spanking session? You’re up first david.
Im ready, and waiting
WAIT! Latex is so not easy to slip into…wtf is the lube?? hee hee
Don’t get me (or Prowln) started…
Low Gemini fits. Looking back at Mystics description of Low Gemini:
http://mysticmedusa.com/2009/05/21/hi-lo-astro-haute-gemini-low-gemini/#comments
AMORAL. tick
DISHONEST. tick
A FLAKE. tick x100
HEARTLESS. tick
Love the FLAKE explanation: “Fearing that mediocrity is some kind of airborne afflication, Geminis seek to innoculate themselves against it by being gaga. A Gemini in free-wheeling flake mode is fearsome. No idea is too stupid to be entertained and no relationship so over the top or too improper that Gemini won’t launch it with gusto. Taboo turns them on – as sociopaths, they are immune to guilt………. ”
Love it Mystic.
Nothing against Geminis but this guy may just be the ultimate LOW Gemini ever.
And I’d put money on a Leo Moon. Low Leo according to Mystic:
Vain, Attention Seeking, Grandiose and Egomaniacal. “Their secret belief is that they are some sort of a higher power and, on a good day quite divine.”
I can’t wait to read Low Libra traits in September.
whoaaa… that is SO awesome! Way to go! *High* 5! or rather, paws in the air Mister Leo Man, shake whatcha got to bake!
HE REPLIED AGIAN!!!!!!!!
On the other hand, in your original email, it appears you intended to write “assess” but you wrote “I will be able to asses our possibilities!”. Hmmm…. Are you trying to make us into a pair of ungrammatical donkeys?? 
My concern was not your punctuation, but whether or not your email was legitimate (i.e. not a prank)…. I look for a lot of things to try to sort out the pranks from the legitimate women. Assuming you are legitimate, I apologize if I offended you. Your email arrived with another one from a purported 17-year-old girl who wanted to have my babies. I immediately busted the man who sent it, and he confessed in reply. I use Vedic astrology (jyotish), which differs from, and is superior to, Western astrology. In my Vedic chart, my Sun is in an earth sign. Mark
Dear Minerva, You GOT ME on the spelling of apostrophe!! LOL
EARTH SIGN!
HA LIAR!
Hey that really rocks! Maybe you could write back and point out that you’ve had a look at his Vedic and translated it to your Western and he looks decidedly Airy?????
Maybe, as per MM’s son’s advice re a woman’s absence making men go crazy with longing (or similar) you could wait for 3 days and THEN WRITE. I fantasise that by then he’ll be telling you everything you ever wanted to know (or not know) about his glorious self.
Hey, good work…
BTW anonymous is really me, something fishy…I seem to have been logged out…
or ask him to justify his asseretion that vedic is superior to western – he’s SOOOOO judgemental isn’t he?
and what’s with the donkeys….is he into animals???? thought he wouldn’t have a bar of pets…lol
Matt baby, I think he LUUUUURVES you!
I KNOW NOW IM LIKE SCARED!
LOL
MATT
Dude, he’s seriously flirting with you… notice the wordplay, the tender probing…eeeuuuuuw.
Brill Idea btw..why not keep emailing him, then when he’s all gooey say you have a “concern” that you’re not sure he can understand but perhaps because of his vastly superior experience with hookers, er I mean, writing about hookers as goddesses, you feel he is THE only person so ever special deigned by everyone and their mother on Mount Olympus..then you say… (notice the nervous yet trembling pause),
“Mark, you see…I’m a hermaphrodite. And NO, I didn’t just mispell aphrodite like a dyslexic. I can give you the best of both worlds.”
hee hee
Time for Auntie Über to step in and say, Minnie Matthews, don’t do anything you’re not comfortable with my sweet underaged transvestite hermaphrodite.
p.s. Saggos rock.
hes not a liar …
hes just playing with technicalities…his *Vedic* sign is in an earth sign Taurus
another really annoying Gemini trait… thats why they are associated with tricksters , conmen and thiefs…the scandanavian God Loki, heretics and heck even Old Nick himself.
ive had a look at sideral/vedic vs the tropical/western and for personality descriptions the western system always seem works better than the vedic…he is far too verbose to be a proper taurean
doesnt sound like he’d be too good at a quiz night does he ?
Matty, all is well in your loving world. If need be, he will be simple to get rid of….But do we now feel a bit sorry for him??? He is trying to flirt with you!
Maybe we should stop now – eclipse season?? but so much fun. Mystic didn’t you say awhile back about how the last week of July would be light and fun? Well it has definitely been entertaining here
Yes he’s so into you Minerva. I bet it was the neptunian weirding/ vision stuff that worked – nice touch.
Just let him down gently tell him you are a bit confused about your god/goddess aspects and leaving to Himalayas on 2 year silent retreat to find the source.
late to the party as usual ! why would dogs drain your energy ? should i email and ask ? i’d have to say i wouldnt fit his profile at all being thin, bad tempered and a snaggle toothed wench however whats the deal with the dogs ? !
I missed that about dogs. Too much detail in his requirements lol.
How can he not like cute puppies? Everyone loves puppies.
only a true psychopath would dislike puppies.
scorpy lovely – I wanted to acknowledge your new avatar last night but felt somehow it was not of this thread. Well SR -LOVE IT – very sexy – is it you – too bad for wolfy if it is some version of Little Red Riding Hood – very sexy coat but no match for wolfy!!
Oh thanks FF
Yes it’s one of my photos from my Little Red Riding Hood series. I made the red cape and my gemini friend posed for the shot with her red shoes. I also photographed the wolf with fake blood on his lips (a sag guy i fancied) It’s one of my fave photos – some kind of magic happened when i took his photo.
Yay! I was right about the Gemini (we think).
Go Matt – anyway, surely a hermaphrodite would be a bonus for him hehe
someone on here who is or knows a journalist should arrange a story – it would make a great article & I’m sure he would respond to that level of public attention!!
Agree that Aussie women would sort him out quicksmart, not put up with his nonsense!
yeah, he wouldn’t know if he was coming or going………
alright i am going to say it – astrologically what sort of woman would go for this guy ? he says he’s getting answers ! so who is answering ? i have to say the stuff about the sex creeps me out, all that stuff about lasting. yeuchoo. u’d think id be ok with it with a scorpio moon but i aint.
Lower than Lower Gem naturally, only they could withstand the pages and pages of soul-destroying factoids he seems intent on unleashing into the world..like a virus. Plus they’d get off on the mind & word games..
I did miss that part about the lasting bubble, now I feel like a toxic bath may be welcome. ick.
yeah ! it is a bit wrong isnt it fallen angel !
it doesnt really tally with the ball room dancing does it no pun intended.
http://groups.google.com/group/alt.invest.real-estate/browse_thread/thread/395901df1be6aa21/155a71ecd47e9601?#155a71ecd47e9601
http://dockets.justia.com/docket/court-cacdce/case_no-2:2005cv05591/case_id-176623/
he sued the entire scientology church!
amazing, I really want to put him in a room with sera beak of spiritualcowgirl, she would MELT his brain.
I have gladly spent an hour-plus of my life reading the comments on this post, (a big thank you all! )
Initially, I was thinking Aries, then Taurus…. but honestly, just knowing that he’s out there wandering around free makes me believe that working girls (he’s keen on them) – in fact all women everywhere should be encouraged to carry – in fact be supplied with – economy-size cans of capsicum spray.
You know, just in case…
he’d talk you into numbness first…so I think earplugs would be also be handy.
“Note: In the photos my teeth are yellowish, but I recently got them whitened by my dentist. I will do another photo shoot soon”
oh my god. That made me LOL so hard.
Ok. My guess is that he’s a Gemini with heavy Taurus influence. He comes across as a sensualist.
Call me crazy (Uranus in Libra in the 1st) but I like this guy. He’s put some thought into what he wants, he not asking for more than he’s willing to give and his broad vision is positive overall. I want to see him find his Goddess and revolutionize the world with his genius computer app or whatever. And become this billionaire who brings the world into the Light while opening car doors and waiting for his slim waisted non-scientologist ex prostie long haired mystic to stop yapping and take a bite of her food so he can eat because he’s starving.
I am totally feeling his vibe (venus and jupiter in Aquarius in the 5th). Big up Mark.
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I am fascinated with this guy. I understand and am okay with some of the things he is seeking, but his way of going about it is so backwards and weird. Plus, what is the whole “resurrecting the innocence in prostitutes” thing?
Someone upthread mentioned something about him having a dark past. Is that something gleaned from his chart, or is there some other information about him?
I suppose I just have a morbid fascination with crazy people.
Btw, I am Leo (Moon in Taurus) and I am getting a Gemini vibe from him.
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The fuqer has temporarily taken his site down…too busy auditioning goddesses?
did he ever respond to anyone – I forget….?
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